Is it rude to compliment a random woman out in public on how beautiful & attractive she is?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have had young AA men compliment me but they do it in the way that it sounds genuine and complimentary without ever being creepy. I have not figured it out how they can be so very charming and effortless about it. I do not think an Asian or Latin man could do the same without sounding like a creep, and the same sentence by a White man would be stalker like! I am Asian, BTW.

It's called fear of being called a racist.

LOL. No, its not that. Some men can compliment in a matter of fact way and it sounds natural and genuine coming from their mouths, I think usually it is young AA men, because they are comfortable in the presence of women and mostly they tend to have more female friends growing up. Whites, Asians and Latinos come across as saying it as a "pick up" line. And that makes it creepy.

[Anonymous]

It depends. I've gotten this a few times at the grocery store and it's made my day. I don't mind an "Excuse me but you're...". If they're polite I just say "Oh! Thanks so much!" and move on. In those cases no one has ever tried to chat me up or anything so I took it was a genuine and non-threatening compliment with no strings attached.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have had young AA men compliment me but they do it in the way that it sounds genuine and complimentary without ever being creepy. I have not figured it out how they can be so very charming and effortless about it. I do not think an Asian or Latin man could do the same without sounding like a creep, and the same sentence by a White man would be stalker like! I am Asian, BTW.

It's called fear of being called a racist.

LOL. No, its not that. Some men can compliment in a matter of fact way and it sounds natural and genuine coming from their mouths, I think usually it is young AA men, because they are comfortable in the presence of women and mostly they tend to have more female friends growing up. Whites, Asians and Latinos come across as saying it as a "pick up" line. And that makes it creepy.

I'd only admit this on an anonymous forum but this is not it for me. I feel more comfortable rolling my eyes at or straight up arguing with a white guy I think is being inappropriate but I get scared sometimes if it's another ethnicity, or, I'm embarrassed to admit, a different class. Ie, trailer trash lolling white guy would make me nervous too. If I'm scared I'm less likely to fight back.

I will say that there is a certain kind of black guy who really can give salacious compliments in a way that feels fun and flirty that seems to be almost exclusive to them. I think it's because it's not leering its like they just genuinely enjoy beautiful women, there's no agenda.

For the most part though complimenting womem out of the blue is very hard to pull off non creepily so I'd avoid it

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have had young AA men compliment me but they do it in the way that it sounds genuine and complimentary without ever being creepy. I have not figured it out how they can be so very charming and effortless about it. I do not think an Asian or Latin man could do the same without sounding like a creep, and the same sentence by a White man would be stalker like! I am Asian, BTW.

It's called fear of being called a racist.

LOL. No, its not that. Some men can compliment in a matter of fact way and it sounds natural and genuine coming from their mouths, I think usually it is young AA men, because they are comfortable in the presence of women and mostly they tend to have more female friends growing up. Whites, Asians and Latinos come across as saying it as a "pick up" line. And that makes it creepy.

I'd only admit this on an anonymous forum but this is not it for me. I feel more comfortable rolling my eyes at or straight up arguing with a white guy I think is being inappropriate but I get scared sometimes if it's another ethnicity, or, I'm embarrassed to admit, a different class. Ie, trailer trash lolling white guy would make me nervous too. If I'm scared I'm less likely to fight back.

I will say that there is a certain kind of black guy who really can give salacious compliments in a way that feels fun and flirty that seems to be almost exclusive to them. I think it's because it's not leering its like they just genuinely enjoy beautiful women, there's no agenda.

For the most part though complimenting women out of the blue is very hard to pull off non creepily so I'd avoid it

Agree to the bolded. I also think that we can agree that cat-calls and obscene verbal harassment was not what was being talked about here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:black dude says to my female co-worker "dat ass. bless you girl" outside of our office. female co-worker just giggled.

no problems.

two days later...white guy (or even worse..Asian guy) says "hey I like your hair today".....reported to HR.

true story - this actually happened.

How is this true? Did it happen twice, with the same timing, with a white guy then an Asian guy? Or are you speculating about some of it? Because you sound like you're full of it.

[Anonymous]

I'm a straight, 34 year old woman, who loves complimenting others. Especially other women. I don't think women genuinely compliment other women enough. So if I'm at Whole Foods and I see someone on w/ a fabulous scarf, I'll tell her it's a great look. Or if I'm at an event and I see someone with fabulous hair or a knockout dress, I'll give her a compliment. My compliments are always sincere and are always met with very sweet gratitude, maybe because women don't do this enough? I just think if you see someone who deserves a compliment, you should be able to give them one sincerely, without being weird.

I gave a compliment to someone at the doctor's office today. She had a radiant smile that was absolutely infectious, and I told her that. Apparently the news she had received wasn't all that happy, and she gave me a light hug and thanked me, saying that turned around her day as she was smiling to avoid crying.

You never know what someone else is going through and if you can make them smile with a sweet compliment, why not?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:black dude says to my female co-worker "dat ass. bless you girl" outside of our office. female co-worker just giggled.

no problems.

two days later...white guy (or even worse..Asian guy) says "hey I like your hair today".....reported to HR.

true story - this actually happened.

How is this true? Did it happen twice, with the same timing, with a white guy then an Asian guy? Or are you speculating about some of it? Because you sound like you're full of it.

True story!! The guy was white... wait he was Asian! Really happened'

I suspect there's a race-obsessed man posting often in this thread in an attempt to turn a thread about something women experience into his personal complaint board of victimhood.

[Anonymous]

If it is a very attractive guy who I like...it's cool....if it's some jerk off- no.

[Anonymous]

There was a thread in this a few weeks ago.
Yes, it's likely offensive if it's a man to a woman. Some women don't mind.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yeah, don't do that. It's pretty creepy as your lead off line. Talk about something else first and make her laugh. You can compliment her after you've had 10 minutes of real conversation.

-Attractive guy

Uhhh
- being on this site/forum
- responding to this thread
- signing yourself "attractive guy"

= wow. Not in a good way, should you misinterpret.

What's wrong with you, PP? Why can't he be on this board and chime in? His perspective is valid. And plenty of other PPs are calling themselves attractive and you seem fine with that. Don't be sexist.

[Anonymous]

I get a lot of comments on my body. Recent example- contractor working at my home said to me " what do you DO? I mean, not to sound weird but you have an amazing body". Other women comment on my arms or legs a lot. The contractor thing was weird and I didn't tell my husband as I k ewnit wiuld bother him. The only times it bothers me is when this happens in front of my daughter. I have a very lean muscular physique- and while I work hard at it a huge part of it is just genetics/body type. I always make sure to say that I had arms (or whatever) like this when I was little and that it's just my body type.

I love to compliment other women. I admire people who can really put themselves together well. I never, ever comment on someone's weight. Ever.

[Anonymous]

I do this a lot when out drunk with my financee. People do it to me if I'm dressed sharp too. Compliments make people happy - unless you're one of those man-hating SJW.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have had young AA men compliment me but they do it in the way that it sounds genuine and complimentary without ever being creepy. I have not figured it out how they can be so very charming and effortless about it. I do not think an Asian or Latin man could do the same without sounding like a creep, and the same sentence by a White man would be stalker like! I am Asian, BTW.

It's called fear of being called a racist.

LOL. No, its not that. Some men can compliment in a matter of fact way and it sounds natural and genuine coming from their mouths, I think usually it is young AA men, because they are comfortable in the presence of women and mostly they tend to have more female friends growing up. Whites, Asians and Latinos come across as saying it as a "pick up" line. And that makes it creepy.

I'd only admit this on an anonymous forum but this is not it for me. I feel more comfortable rolling my eyes at or straight up arguing with a white guy I think is being inappropriate but I get scared sometimes if it's another ethnicity, or, I'm embarrassed to admit, a different class. Ie, trailer trash lolling white guy would make me nervous too. If I'm scared I'm less likely to fight back.

I will say that there is a certain kind of black guy who really can give salacious compliments in a way that feels fun and flirty that seems to be almost exclusive to them. I think it's because it's not leering its like they just genuinely enjoy beautiful women, there's no agenda.

For the most part though complimenting women out of the blue is very hard to pull off non creepily so I'd avoid it

Agree to the bolded. I also think that we can agree that cat-calls and obscene verbal harassment was not what was being talked about here.

nah, it's the secret desire of many women to have a bbc experience that precludes them to think of this as rude or creepy. it's ok to admit you're turned on by AA guys complimenting you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have had young AA men compliment me but they do it in the way that it sounds genuine and complimentary without ever being creepy. I have not figured it out how they can be so very charming and effortless about it. I do not think an Asian or Latin man could do the same without sounding like a creep, and the same sentence by a White man would be stalker like! I am Asian, BTW.

It's called fear of being called a racist.

LOL. No, its not that. Some men can compliment in a matter of fact way and it sounds natural and genuine coming from their mouths, I think usually it is young AA men, because they are comfortable in the presence of women and mostly they tend to have more female friends growing up. Whites, Asians and Latinos come across as saying it as a "pick up" line. And that makes it creepy.

I'd only admit this on an anonymous forum but this is not it for me. I feel more comfortable rolling my eyes at or straight up arguing with a white guy I think is being inappropriate but I get scared sometimes if it's another ethnicity, or, I'm embarrassed to admit, a different class. Ie, trailer trash lolling white guy would make me nervous too. If I'm scared I'm less likely to fight back.

I will say that there is a certain kind of black guy who really can give salacious compliments in a way that feels fun and flirty that seems to be almost exclusive to them. I think it's because it's not leering its like they just genuinely enjoy beautiful women, there's no agenda.

For the most part though complimenting women out of the blue is very hard to pull off non creepily so I'd avoid it

Agree to the bolded. I also think that we can agree that cat-calls and obscene verbal harassment was not what was being talked about here.

nah, it's the secret desire of many women to have a bbc experience that precludes them to think of this as rude or creepy. it's ok to admit you're turned on by AA guys complimenting you.

I'm the PP. No this is not it at all. I really don't know how to describe it. It's something about how they just seem delighted to see a pretty lady. This is not universal, I think plenty of guys hitting on me of all ethnicities are creepy AF. This is a really specific thing. And I think it really has to do with feeling literally NO pressure. It's just like they're astounded to see a pretty face and can't help themselves telling you. It's weird.

[Anonymous]

I don't like it, don't draw attention to my appearance.
I would think you are shallow too.