My daughter is the only white girl in her grade: ask me anything

[Anonymous]

OP, I think that it is awesome that you are so invested in your child's school experience. The reason that I think this is that I was a white student in a majority African American school when I was younger and my parents were nowhere near as interested in my school experience than you are. While the experience was very eye opening and has helped me become who I am today, it would have been easier if my parents understood that there are struggles when one is a minority anywhere, especially when you are one of few white kids in your class.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, I think that it is awesome that you are so invested in your child's school experience. The reason that I think this is that I was a white student in a majority African American school when I was younger and my parents were nowhere near as interested in my school experience than you are. While the experience was very eye opening and has helped me become who I am today, it would have been easier if my parents understood that there are struggles when one is a minority anywhere, especially when you are one of few white kids in your class.

Being a minority in a high ses white school is much different. Those children are taught to be inclusive and cordial to all regardless of color. When you are the minority in a lower ses minority majority those kids tend to exclude others and are not behaved. Furthermore society especially their society promotes the idea that reverse racism doesn't exist and is acceptable

[Anonymous]

"No, I think once you go thru the process with older one, your views change. When you have only one young kid like you, your views are still naive/innocent. Don't get me wrong. I think what you are doing is great but the reality can be harsh for your DD later. "

+1 million.

Here's the deal. Every one of my friends who was enthused about their diverse school when their kids were in K were reconsidering their decision to stay by third grade, when the lack of academic intensity becomes apparent. And all but one have pulled their kids from their original schools to put them into higher performing schools.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I think that it is awesome that you are so invested in your child's school experience. The reason that I think this is that I was a white student in a majority African American school when I was younger and my parents were nowhere near as interested in my school experience than you are. While the experience was very eye opening and has helped me become who I am today, it would have been easier if my parents understood that there are struggles when one is a minority anywhere, especially when you are one of few white kids in your class.

Being a minority in a high ses white school is much different. Those children are taught to be inclusive and cordial to all regardless of color. When you are the minority in a lower ses minority majority those kids tend to exclude others and are not behaved. Furthermore society especially their society promotes the idea that reverse racism doesn't exist and is acceptable

You cannot be serious, being a minority in a majority white school can be very isolating.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I think that it is awesome that you are so invested in your child's school experience. The reason that I think this is that I was a white student in a majority African American school when I was younger and my parents were nowhere near as interested in my school experience than you are. While the experience was very eye opening and has helped me become who I am today, it would have been easier if my parents understood that there are struggles when one is a minority anywhere, especially when you are one of few white kids in your class.

Being a minority in a high ses white school is much different. Those children are taught to be inclusive and cordial to all regardless of color. When you are the minority in a lower ses minority majority those kids tend to exclude others and are not behaved. Furthermore society especially their society promotes the idea that reverse racism doesn't exist and is acceptable

You cannot be serious, being a minority in a majority white school can be very isolating.

PP didn't read the post. The bolded is not what the above posts talks about. Ignore.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We were in the same position for 4 years except with a son. We ultimately did leave due to a need for a different level of instruction for our child, which the school couldn't provide because they were fighting an uphill battle to raise test scores to proficient.

The majority of the kids were learning at level, many below level, and many were ELL. The lack of academic diversity at a higher level in DC among lower performing schools is largely due to the demographic make-up of our city and systemic, generation poverty, which in DC just so happens to affect mostly "brown" people. Not fair, not cool, not sure what to do about it.

If they omitted ELL students' test scores from being included in school averages, I think it would go a long way in showing a truer reflection of how classrooms are working (because many ELL students are pulled out for separate/supplemental instruction that they need). That may attract more families invested in academics, and that may further increase scores and resources that these schools desperately need.

Didn't mean to hijack! Sorry!

If you want to figure out test scores for various subgroups, it's available. You need to go to LearnDC.org and drill down into the 'Next Generations Assessments' tab.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I think that it is awesome that you are so invested in your child's school experience. The reason that I think this is that I was a white student in a majority African American school when I was younger and my parents were nowhere near as interested in my school experience than you are. While the experience was very eye opening and has helped me become who I am today, it would have been easier if my parents understood that there are struggles when one is a minority anywhere, especially when you are one of few white kids in your class.

Being a minority in a high ses white school is much different. Those children are taught to be inclusive and cordial to all regardless of color. When you are the minority in a lower ses minority majority those kids tend to exclude others and are not behaved. Furthermore society especially their society promotes the idea that reverse racism doesn't exist and is acceptable

OP here.

"Reverse racism" does not exist. There is racism and then there is non-racism. Racial prejudice against white people does exist, and everyone knows it exists. Your post is racist as hell. "Those kids tend to exclude other and are not behaved" - listen to yourself. "Their society"?

School is a place where students learn how to behave in social situations. Some kids may not have learned this before. My kid was terrible at sharing and waiting in line. She is better at it now, but she's still not perfect. Her low SES black friends are similarly better at but not perfect at behaving well.

If there is anything that I've learned on DCUM, it's certainly that "those children" are ABSOLUTELY not taught to "be inclusive and cordial to all regardless of color." If that was the case, more of y'all would be sending your white kids to your majority non-white neighborhood schools.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"No, I think once you go thru the process with older one, your views change. When you have only one young kid like you, your views are still naive/innocent. Don't get me wrong. I think what you are doing is great but the reality can be harsh for your DD later. "

+1 million.

Here's the deal. Every one of my friends who was enthused about their diverse school when their kids were in K were reconsidering their decision to stay by third grade, when the lack of academic intensity becomes apparent. And all but one have pulled their kids from their original schools to put them into higher performing schools.

OP here.

A lot of my friends moved to the suburbs when they had kids. I don't want to do that, because I like where I live. I kind of resent your blanket "here's the deal" as though your experience is inevitable. It's not. I'm not putting my fingers in my ears ignoring the potential issues, but I personally am not going to take evasive action before the issues even arise. If the school stops meeting DD's academic needs, we can move somewhere that does. If middle school remains a huge clusterfuck in 3/4 years, we can move somewhere that is not. If she starts getting picked on for being white, my first choice would be to deal with that bullying like any other bullying and not assume that every kid she interacts with is going to be a racist bully.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"No, I think once you go thru the process with older one, your views change. When you have only one young kid like you, your views are still naive/innocent. Don't get me wrong. I think what you are doing is great but the reality can be harsh for your DD later. "

+1 million.

Here's the deal. Every one of my friends who was enthused about their diverse school when their kids were in K were reconsidering their decision to stay by third grade, when the lack of academic intensity becomes apparent. And all but one have pulled their kids from their original schools to put them into higher performing schools.

Yes, we know this. That doesn't mean you should try to crap on parents who send their kids to their neighborhood schools. You're being condescending.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I bet your pta sucks ass

I assume your question is "What is the PTA like at your school?"

We have one. I'm on it. It's not as diverse as I'd like (heavily weighted toward the parents of young white children). There are other non-official organized groups of parents. I would like to be able to bring everyone together, but I am not a miracle worker. It takes time.

Our PTA raises small amounts of money, usually through events and memberships, and we pay for things like field trips and teacher appreciation lunch and other random expenses. We are a Title 1 school, so we get a lot of benefits that PTAs cover at other schools, like aftercare being free or $80/mo this year, all lunches being free, enrichment happening through the school, etc. I would like to figure out how to get some better extracurricular activities in our aftercare program, but I don't have the time or money to do that by myself and I'm not going to demand other people do it for me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I think that it is awesome that you are so invested in your child's school experience. The reason that I think this is that I was a white student in a majority African American school when I was younger and my parents were nowhere near as interested in my school experience than you are. While the experience was very eye opening and has helped me become who I am today, it would have been easier if my parents understood that there are struggles when one is a minority anywhere, especially when you are one of few white kids in your class.

Being a minority in a high ses white school is much different. Those children are taught to be inclusive and cordial to all regardless of color. When you are the minority in a lower ses minority majority those kids tend to exclude others and are not behaved. Furthermore society especially their society promotes the idea that reverse racism doesn't exist and is acceptable

Ha! You should be ashamed. I hope you don't teach your children to make sweeping generalizations about different groups of people. The most horribly behaved child in my kid's class is high ses and white. Stop acting like white kids can't be assholes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"No, I think once you go thru the process with older one, your views change. When you have only one young kid like you, your views are still naive/innocent. Don't get me wrong. I think what you are doing is great but the reality can be harsh for your DD later. "

+1 million.

Here's the deal. Every one of my friends who was enthused about their diverse school when their kids were in K were reconsidering their decision to stay by third grade, when the lack of academic intensity becomes apparent. And all but one have pulled their kids from their original schools to put them into higher performing schools.

Where are your questions?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I think that it is awesome that you are so invested in your child's school experience. The reason that I think this is that I was a white student in a majority African American school when I was younger and my parents were nowhere near as interested in my school experience than you are. While the experience was very eye opening and has helped me become who I am today, it would have been easier if my parents understood that there are struggles when one is a minority anywhere, especially when you are one of few white kids in your class.

Being a minority in a high ses white school is much different. Those children are taught to be inclusive and cordial to all regardless of color. When you are the minority in a lower ses minority majority those kids tend to exclude others and are not behaved. Furthermore society especially their society promotes the idea that reverse racism doesn't exist and is acceptable

OP here.

"Reverse racism" does not exist. There is racism and then there is non-racism. Racial prejudice against white people does exist, and everyone knows it exists. Your post is racist as hell. "Those kids tend to exclude other and are not behaved" - listen to yourself. "Their society"?

School is a place where students learn how to behave in social situations. Some kids may not have learned this before. My kid was terrible at sharing and waiting in line. She is better at it now, but she's still not perfect. Her low SES black friends are similarly better at but not perfect at behaving well.

If there is anything that I've learned on DCUM, it's certainly that "those children" are ABSOLUTELY not taught to "be inclusive and cordial to all regardless of color." If that was the case, more of y'all would be sending your white kids to your majority non-white neighborhood schools.

+1000

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I think that it is awesome that you are so invested in your child's school experience. The reason that I think this is that I was a white student in a majority African American school when I was younger and my parents were nowhere near as interested in my school experience than you are. While the experience was very eye opening and has helped me become who I am today, it would have been easier if my parents understood that there are struggles when one is a minority anywhere, especially when you are one of few white kids in your class.

Being a minority in a high ses white school is much different. Those children are taught to be inclusive and cordial to all regardless of color. When you are the minority in a lower ses minority majority those kids tend to exclude others and are not behaved. Furthermore society especially their society promotes the idea that reverse racism doesn't exist and is acceptable

HA HA HA HA HA!!! Let me get this straight - no racism or excluding from the white kids because they know better. Only racism we need to worry about is the 'reverse racism'.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is she aware that she is "different"?

Sometimes. She is aware that she does not speak Spanish like many of her friends. She also knows that she has different hair. Other than that, no.

Aren't latino's white?

Did anyone come to her birthday party?

NP. Yes, Zoe Saldana, Jimmy Smits, Rosario Dawson, Rosie Perez, and LaLa Anthony are white.

No they are not white. Some of these people listed have African heritage in their backgrounds. I only say this because I know two of the people listed.