'coaching' my part-time goalie son behind the goal in U11 rec games

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:so there is a rule that prohibits this, in rec league? a few PPs mentioned as such in travel but none in rec.

BTW i didn't post some of those 'angry' comments. this is OP.

What is enforced in Rec may be more lax but 5 pages worth of comments have told you that it is bad form and to not do it. Isn't that clear enough for you to understand?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:so there is a rule that prohibits this, in rec league? a few PPs mentioned as such in travel but none in rec.

BTW i didn't post some of those 'angry' comments. this is OP.

Some fields are marked differently than others, and some refs differ from others. One NCSL ref made parents stay in a marked area. Others are totally lax -- I'm the one who mentioned the U9 travel dad standing behind his kid and "coaching" with a lot of tough-guy talk. That was at a school in which it's not really practical to keep parents completely out of the "end zone" area, but still ...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My daughter is a youth soccer referee. If you were coaching from the sidelines or behind the goal, she would give you a warning. If you kept doing it, or did any of the other behavior that you've cited, she would send you to your car. If you continued, she'd declare a forfeit and send your kid's whole team to the parking lot.

And yes, I've seen her, at 5'2" and barely 100 lbs, take on parents like you and do exactly as I said.

Good for her. Seriously - more refs in travel need to do this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Maybe this is sport specific, but DS plays baseball and parents frequently call out to the kids as they are playing with play suggestions. Examples would be - choke up on the bat Jonny, get closer to the plate, back of the box, play is at first, creeping infield, look alive outfield, look for the steal. This chatter from the families (I've seen grandparents yell this stuff) is pretty standard. I've never heard a coach or ump tell the parents not to do it.

Yikes! That kind of thing drives me crazy. When we get too much of this going on, my son's coach politely reminds everyone that it really helps the kids to just have one coach on the field. Everyone gets the message.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:so there is a rule that prohibits this, in rec league? a few PPs mentioned as such in travel but none in rec.

BTW i didn't post some of those 'angry' comments. this is OP.

Some fields are marked differently than others, and some refs differ from others. One NCSL ref made parents stay in a marked area. Others are totally lax -- I'm the one who mentioned the U9 travel dad standing behind his kid and "coaching" with a lot of tough-guy talk. That was at a school in which it's not really practical to keep parents completely out of the "end zone" area, but still ...

The rule in WAGS is that parents have to stand between the 18 yard boxes on the sideline opposite the team. Refs don't typically enforce it, but pretty sure they would if a parent stood right behind the goal coaching. (I have take photos from well behind the goal and haven't been told not to, but different situation).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:so there is a rule that prohibits this, in rec league? a few PPs mentioned as such in travel but none in rec.

BTW i didn't post some of those 'angry' comments. this is OP.

What is enforced in Rec may be more lax but 5 pages worth of comments have told you that it is bad form and to not do it. Isn't that clear enough for you to understand?

NP here without rec experience. I have only skimmed this thread but from OP's first post I got the idea he realized it might be bad form, or he wouldn't have asked the question. What's the solution to the kids yelling at OP's son when he lets a goal in? The coach will handle this, or OP should ask the coach to handle this?

[Anonymous]

is it even realistic to expect a coach to give any instruction to the goalie in a game? they're the furthest away from the coach and i've only heard something like 'use your hand' when the kid evidently forgot he could

[Anonymous]

We've had hard losses, if there were ever any issues with kids yelling at other kids then it was brought to the attention of the coach. If you are doing MSI soccer they have entire rules about parent's during games.If fact they have a parent "TSL" who is to monitor behavior of other parents. No coaching from parents unless they are the coaching, its ok to encourage "good job" but if you are frustrated with a player, a coach or the ref zip it or be expected to leave the game.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:so there is a rule that prohibits this, in rec league? a few PPs mentioned as such in travel but none in rec.

BTW i didn't post some of those 'angry' comments. this is OP.

What is enforced in Rec may be more lax but 5 pages worth of comments have told you that it is bad form and to not do it. Isn't that clear enough for you to understand?

NP here without rec experience. I have only skimmed this thread but from OP's first post I got the idea he realized it might be bad form, or he wouldn't have asked the question. What's the solution to the kids yelling at OP's son when he lets a goal in? The coach will handle this, or OP should ask the coach to handle this?

I'm pretty sure I recommended that he talk with the coach about the kids negative comments but to never address the kids directly. As a parent, he should be positive on the sideline and discuss any of the negative comments from teammates with his son away from the game.

All the kids are learning the game and that is why it is called "Rec" for short from "Recreation" for a reason. The game is supposed to be recreational and fun. Competition is a part of the fun, but leave that to the kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:is it even realistic to expect a coach to give any instruction to the goalie in a game? they're the furthest away from the coach and i've only heard something like 'use your hand' when the kid evidently forgot he could

Yes, it is. At U11 rec the fields are small-sided anyway. The GK may be closer than a mid fielder or striker on the far side.

Here's the general problem - you can't coach soccer like the kids are radio controlled players. First, they can't react quickly enough. second, they have to figure out what to do on their own in real-time. That is true for field players as well as keepers.

Coaches have to let them play; parents have to let them play. Coaching specifics needs to happen during practices - when they can stop a scrimmage or show them in a drill. And if the coach won't do that for the keeper, then the OP dad needs to take his kid out to a field himself some evening and show him what to do. It's not that hard to teach the basics, whether it's scooping, catching, punching, or positioning. That all needs to be worked on in the environment of practice, not a game, when you can fix the problems.

E.g., if he's always out of position, show him how to keep his bearings, where he needs to be for angles, etc. If he needs work on catching, throw/kick him bouncing and high balls. Do some scooping, with rollers, encouraging him to come out. Show him how to dive properly. If necessary, sign him up for a GK clinic.

[Anonymous]

Perfect timing!!! Arlington Rec is having silent soccer this weekend. Zip your pie hole.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:so there is a rule that prohibits this, in rec league? a few PPs mentioned as such in travel but none in rec.

BTW i didn't post some of those 'angry' comments. this is OP.

Yes, totally there is a rev league rule against parents standing behind the goal.
At a Stoddert rev game the ref would kick the coach out first for not properly controlling his/her parents.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Perfect timing!!! Arlington Rec is having silent soccer this weekend. Zip your pie hole.

Bring a box of lollipops for the parents... Sad, but effective.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:is it even realistic to expect a coach to give any instruction to the goalie in a game? they're the furthest away from the coach and i've only heard something like 'use your hand' when the kid evidently forgot he could

The time to coach a kid is in practice - never in a game. A quiet coach during a soccer game is a skilled one.
Take some soccer coaching classes - they're fun and informative.
I hate that many rec leagues don't require any coaching courses.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:is it even realistic to expect a coach to give any instruction to the goalie in a game? they're the furthest away from the coach and i've only heard something like 'use your hand' when the kid evidently forgot he could

The time to coach a kid is in practice - never in a game. A quiet coach during a soccer game is a skilled one.
Take some soccer coaching classes - they're fun and informative.
I hate that many rec leagues don't require any coaching courses.

Seriously, our rec coach is a million times better than my other kid's travel coach.

The travel kid has a micromanaging screamer during games that does not let players figure things out for themselves...add in the sideline coaching from the dads and my head is about to explode.