'coaching' my part-time goalie son behind the goal in U11 rec games
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Anonymous
yes that's me the OP. i was mad when i posted that but got over it. just felt coach could've done more. don't think he's learning or improving by failing like that. but whatever. i've moved on. (until the next game, that is  )
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Anonymous
If you want to be productive, go have a chat with the coach during the week (after practice, after school, just not right before the game). Tell em your kid is struggling in goal for X, Y, Z reasons, and that you hope the coach can help give him some pointers during the game. Hopefully the coach will pay more attention. Or, maybe volunteer to help coach the team and work with the GKs (guessing he splits duty with someone else?). Then you can help from a proper position to instruct him. All that said, you're not going to help him with instant reactions - if positioning is an issue, the reminder needs to come before the striker has the ball in the box - i.e., reminders when he's not in position well before the opponent has the ball in scoring position. Same thing for coming out to challenge - you can't yell at him then, as he'll be a step or more too late anyway - tell him after a play "Hey, tommy, when you see that you should be coming hard" or "hey Joey, you need to hold your line and let the defender help on that." |
Anonymous
It is Rec for crying out loud. Just let him have fun and learn on his own. |
Anonymous
| This original poster is a complete freak. |
Anonymous
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Frankly, I see nothing wrong with giving instant feebback or instruction at the game, coaches do that all the time during timeouts or substitution or between innings or at halftime. GK gets a lot of downtime between actions which is perfect for this, plus no practice can emulate game situations like a real game.
Especially since this is rec, which is about development and learning, and especially if the coach isn't doing that, then let the parents do it. |
Anonymous
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OP, I kind of get what you are saying -- it's tough to have your kid put in a tough situation with no support from the coach and kids yelling.
How well do you know soccer? How much experience does the coach have? If the coach is a dad who is muddling through because no one else offered to coach (the situation my brother was in a while ago) and you played enough to know what you are talking about, then I get it. If the coach is a former college standout with pro experience and you are a dad who never played (the case with my son in basketball --- I'm clueless dad), then you should approach the coach and ask how you can support your son and only do what he says. And in that case, don't coach from the sidelines. The other thing you can do is tape the game and (if your son wants to) watch it with him and help him try to where he needs to be. I did this with DS out of desperation a couple of years ago when he had a different, very unhelpful coach. DS had no idea what to do in the coach's offense (think playground 5 on 5 with each always playing iso --- until he got trapped and heaved a desperate lob pass --- and 4 kids watching), so we taped games and worked out patterns, then went to the park and worked on them (e.g. "point guard passes to the other guy on the perimeter and you know he tries to drive every time and turns it over, so how do you help?"). DS worked on boxing out for rebounds, setting a screen, running the baseline, etc. --- basically ways he could help the offense. Doing that a couple of times REALLY made a difference in DS's game --- he went from standing around watching the ball to being active and trying to help because he could start to see patterns in what was going on. I don't know if there are similar patterns that goal keepers can start to recognize, but if so and if you can work with helping your DS see them on tape and then work specifically on reacting to them in one on one practice (sometimes this takes some imagination with only you and him, but it's doable), it will probably help. |
Anonymous
There is everything wrong with giving instant feedback. The goal in the net is instant feedback. Keepers need to see thousands of shots to improve and learn to read the game. Your being in his ear, will do zero for his development, absolutely zero. The best thing you can do is just be supportive, and let him know that the game does not rest on his shoulders alone. But joysticking him will not make him better. Just sit in your chair and keep your mouth shut other than cheering. |
Anonymous
Yes, just chill. Sometimes the other team is just that good, and sometimes your kid's team is just that terrible. You shouting instructions like an asshole is not going to make your kid's team better. If all the coaching they received before the game is insufficient to stop the other team from scoring, then you shouting instructions like an asshole is not going to cause your kid's team to stop them either. As I told my son when he was goalie, to score a goal the other team has to get past your entire team first. Therefore it is everybody's fault if the other team scores, not just the goalie's fault. |
Anonymous
This is something I might go stomping over to tell my kid's team if I heard them yelling at my kid. |
Anonymous
Or you just tell your kid this privately and never address anyone's kid, unless you would like parents addressing your kid. Jesus, you sound like a total jerk. You might just stay the eff away from the game. |
Anonymous
Blow me. If other kids are yelling at my kid, they're going to get the rebuke they deserve. |
Anonymous
You are the embodiment of a rec parent. Talk to the coach about the "chatter" on the field. But as a parent you should set the example not only for your kid but for the other kids as well. They are 11 and can get a "pass" to a point, but as an adult, yelling at someone else's, you look like a jerk and are over stepping your boundaries. NEVER address another kid in a negative way, and best to simply leave negative comments to yourself all around. Just relax. Keep in mind that not a single person in this thread has endorsed your behavior. That alone should tell you something. Coach you kid during the week. Talk to your kid about how to take and shake of criticism. Those are the things that are positive that you can contribute, but on game day, keep your mouth shut. |
Anonymous
no YOU need to chill. nobody's shouting anything to anybody's ear, and nobody's acting like an asshole except in your twisted mind. i get it, you're wonderful, and everyone else who doesn't do it the way you do is just awful. |
Anonymous
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Maybe this is sport specific, but DS plays baseball and parents frequently call out to the kids as they are playing with play suggestions. Examples would be - choke up on the bat Jonny, get closer to the plate, back of the box, play is at first, creeping infield, look alive outfield, look for the steal. This chatter from the families (I've seen grandparents yell this stuff) is pretty standard. I've never heard a coach or ump tell the parents not to do it.
I try not to yell at my kid, as it is embarrassing for him. He wants to play on his own. I do provide suggestions when he is warming up pitching while his team is batting. The coaches provided zero input on pitching, and proper form is essential for arm care. He takes lessons, and I provide feedback if he is doing movements that could lead to injury. The coaches never say anything, and DS likes the feedback, as it's more private than when he's out on the field. If the coaches were knowledgeable and took the time to coach him on pitching, I wouldn't feel the need to be so involved during the game. |
Anonymous
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so there is a rule that prohibits this, in rec league? a few PPs mentioned as such in travel but none in rec.
BTW i didn't post some of those 'angry' comments. this is OP. |