How would you feel/ react?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your insecurity will kill your marriage long before any other person will.

Right. What’s going on in your marriage that you think this is a threat?

[Anonymous]

Uhh your husband was up front, hasn't responded yet. I feel like your intense reaction is more of your guilt that they were together when you met than anything. Your DH did as well as he could in the scenario. I guess he has learned never to be honest with you again if you're making a big deal out of this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wonder how op will feel in 5 years when ex has partnered with someone else to what turns out to be the next billion dollar breakthrough idea, knowing she and her insecurity blocked her own blessing.

Well, this thread is about 5-1/2 years old so maybe OP will come back and let us know how it worked out!

Exactly!! People this is an old thread and OPs husband probably married his fiancé.

[Anonymous]

Ask him what night. Your college BF is in town and we need to make sure the kids are covered...

[Anonymous]

Ask him what night. Your college BF is in town and we need to make sure the kids are covered...

Exactly. He should be totally comfortable with this.

But I'm just a petty divorced b*tch, whose husband had an affair with a business colleague. In hindsight, I'll never try to stop a man again. If they're gonna cheat, they'll find a way. Hopefully, out of respect, your husband won't go to dinner with an ex while you have 2 young kids at home.

[Anonymous]

I didn't realize this an old thread. I want OP to come back and update.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Before I met dh, he had a fiance. Soon after they broke up, we got together. We have been married for 3 years and have a newborn and a two year old. We have been together for 5 years.

He tells me his ex called emailed him that she is in town in a few weeks. She would like to see him over dinner to potentially discuss doing business. They are in a similar industry.

WTF???
She knows he is married with kids.
He has not replied. He told me about it. He wanted to see how I felt about it.
I am not happy that he is even considering it. He said he will tell her no.

The business thing is BS, I am sure. It is an excuse. Plus, even if true, my dh is an idiot for considering having business dealings with her, (he works for a family owned business). The whole thing is inappropriate.
Yes, I am glad he was open about it but I think he is a little dumb.

How would you feel and or react?
I am interested in hearing from both men and women.

I'm a woman.
I wouldn't be thrilled about him meeting her, but if he told me about it and wanted to know what I thought before even responding to her, I would trust him.

Just because she was engaged to him, it doesn't mean she wants him now. I don't want any of my exes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your insecurity will kill your marriage long before any other person will.

+1

He told you about it. I wouldn't care personally.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I wonder how op will feel in 5 years when ex has partnered with someone else to what turns out to be the next billion dollar breakthrough idea, knowing she and her insecurity blocked her own blessing.

This thread is 6 years old. Maybe OP will see it.

[Anonymous]

Woman here. This wouldn't bother me at all.

If the only thing standing between your husband and cheating is one dinner with an ex, you've got serious problems in your marriage.

Why do you assume her reasoning is BS when they work in the same industry? This all sounds completely on the up and up to me, especially because he was completely honest and open with you about it.

If my husband wanted to go, either to be polite, or to catch up, or to see what the business deal is, that would all be fine with me. I have complete confidence that if he got (either before, during, or after dinner) vibes that she wanted him back, he'd leave, and we'd have a good laugh about it later.

[Anonymous]

Why do people revise threads that are almost 6 years old?

[Anonymous]

This is beyond inappropriate

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Before I met dh, he had a fiance. Soon after they broke up, we got together. We have been married for 3 years and have a newborn and a two year old. We have been together for 5 years.

He tells me his ex called emailed him that she is in town in a few weeks. She would like to see him over dinner to potentially discuss doing business. They are in a similar industry.

WTF???
She knows he is married with kids.
He has not replied. He told me about it. He wanted to see how I felt about it.
I am not happy that he is even considering it. He said he will tell her no.

The business thing is BS, I am sure. It is an excuse. Plus, even if true, my dh is an idiot for considering having business dealings with her, (he works for a family owned business). The whole thing is inappropriate.
Yes, I am glad he was open about it but I think he is a little dumb.

See you are going to get responses saying you are insecure and all this shit. No, you are not. I see clearly how this situation would be awful and how it would be make you feel. I’m starting to think guys are just dumb when it comes to this stuff. I’m married and I’m tired of this behavior from the men we married thinking, “well it’s just business, well I wasn’t doing anything inappropriate”. Meanwhile if they met up they would be having a gay ole time laughing giggling and skirting that line of being overly friendly. No, just no.
How would you feel and or react?
I am interested in hearing from both men and women.

[Anonymous]

He could discuss over phone in a half hour business meeting during the day, and if she insists on meeting (and he finds the opportunity good) then in the office with another associate present. It is possible it’s a work contact and nothing more.

[Anonymous]

^^oh, and he could also find out if referring her on or getting other contacts for himself for this opportunity is an option.