What makes you drop a guy?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

In the mean time, I will continue to say that you are fucking idiots. In a few years, you'll be complaining bitterly that you can't find a husband, or that can't get pregnant because it too you to long to get married and you are too old, or that you can't believe your non-geeky DH just knocked up the OW. Keep chasing the cool guys, ladies. Have fun.

No one is looking for "cool guys". If you are looking for decent men and find that certain behavior from your dates raises red flags for you - go with your gut. I want to say that some women also have the same habits as listed on this thread. It depends on what you are willing to overlook and what you are not willing to overlook.

PP, you made a big leap here. It is not necessary for everyone to like geeky guys. It does not translate to "your ovaries will shrivel up" and "your DH will cheat". I also want to comment that thinking a geeky husband will not be an asshole or cheat with OW is pretty delusional. Their geekiness (behaviour and appearance) is not an antidote to cheating.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Plays golf
Plays video games
Plays poker

Golf??? Why? My DH plays golf and taught me. We often play together. During the week he plays with clients.

Golf is a divorce-able offense at my house. No golf.

Same here. Sorry, you don't get a hobby that takes up 75% of your free time. I'd never have kids with you. I know too many friends whose husbands work long hours during the week and then their husbands get one weekend day off too for golf. Fuck that noise.

[Anonymous]

Frequently shit-talking his ex-wife. Referring to ex-girlfriends as "crazy." Either: talking about being a father and expecting praise each time ("oh, it's so good you're involved"..yada) or not being up front about having children. Canceling and re-scheduling plans very early in a relationship and expecting me to understand, as if my time isn't of value. Either freaking out at my Ph.D. ("you must be really smart") or working hard to dismiss it ("well, they don't teach the real world in school"). Being weirded out by my spirituality. I like God, deal with it. Being competitive in any way. I'm looking for a partner, please try to see us on the same team. Otherwise, I'm just not interested in pursuing a relationship.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:Comes on too strong. One guy was talking marriage by the third date! Another told me he dumped his girlfriend for me.

The worst, though, was the guy who told me he had built a computer from scratch and had named it after his mother.

You don't deserve that guy. He's smart and he probably makes money and he probably stays home. If he is reasonable looking and reasonably fun, he's a keeper.

He stays home in his mom's basement.

That's a different problem then "tech-y" and "loves his mother."

Its not far off. Were you him?

No. I'm female. I went to an engineering school, though. I know tons of great male engineers and scientists. 90% of them are great catches. They might build a computer and name it after their mom or their girlfriend, though.

Great. Go date them then. If someone else is turned off by that and thinks a dude has daddy issues because of it then that's her preference, get over it.

I did. Found a great husband that way. Thanks!

In the mean time, I will continue to say that you are fucking idiots. In a few years, you'll be complaining bitterly that you can't find a husband, or that can't get pregnant because it too you to long to get married and you are too old, or that you can't believe your non-geeky DH just knocked up the OW. Keep chasing the cool guys, ladies. Have fun.

You sound bitter cause you cashed in too early. Try to keep it inside and let everyone else be happy will ya?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If he's dumb. Like a sharp guy who stands up to me.

Oh, so you're a bitch?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Continues seeing other women after things get physical.

What if you aren't any good?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Handsome, successful and generous. Has sex with him twice - it was absolutely horrible.
Had to tell him we were not a fit...

How was it "absolutely horrible"? Only way I can imagine sex being so bad is if he put it in the wrong hole.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Handsome, successful and generous. Has sex with him twice - it was absolutely horrible.
Had to tell him we were not a fit...

How was it "absolutely horrible"? Only way I can imagine sex being so bad is if he put it in the wrong hole.

You never had bad sex? Wow. Lucky you. You probably don't even know if your woman orgasms with you

Well, he didn't feel the temp I needed. Couldn't perform oral. When kissed my nipples, his saliva was all over the place. So it was "absolutely horrible". I thought he was too nervous during our first night. Apparently he is just bad at it. Maybe there are women who are too desperate for a man and don't care about the sex but I do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Handsome, successful and generous. Has sex with him twice - it was absolutely horrible.
Had to tell him we were not a fit...

How was it "absolutely horrible"? Only way I can imagine sex being so bad is if he put it in the wrong hole.

You never had bad sex? Wow. Lucky you. You probably don't even know if your woman orgasms with you

Well, he didn't feel the temp I needed. Couldn't perform oral. When kissed my nipples, his saliva was all over the place. So it was "absolutely horrible". I thought he was too nervous during our first night. Apparently he is just bad at it. Maybe there are women who are too desperate for a man and don't care about the sex but I do.

Did you do anything to help him meet your needs?

How did you tell him you were not a fit?

[Anonymous]

Beer breath
Farts in my presence
Doesn't keep promises
He spends weekends in another town ( he may have somebody else...)
When we go out, he constantly looks at other women.
Doesn't look at my eyes

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Comes on too strong. One guy was talking marriage by the third date! Another told me he dumped his girlfriend for me.

The worst, though, was the guy who told me he had built a computer from scratch and had named it after his mother.

You don't deserve that guy. He's smart and he probably makes money and he probably stays home. If he is reasonable looking and reasonably fun, he's a keeper.

I know, I thought the computer guy sounded sweet. Smart and loves family. What's not to like?

[Anonymous]

I have dropped guys for the following:

Too emotionally needy
Begged me to go out with him again after I said I didn't think we were compatible
Lied to me about his age
Wanted to inspect my fingernails, and spent a lot of time judging my appearance rather than trying to get to know me
Controlling - answered questions direct at me, instead of letting me answer for myself

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Handsome, successful and generous. Has sex with him twice - it was absolutely horrible.
Had to tell him we were not a fit...

How was it "absolutely horrible"? Only way I can imagine sex being so bad is if he put it in the wrong hole.

You never had bad sex? Wow. Lucky you. You probably don't even know if your woman orgasms with you

Well, he didn't feel the temp I needed. Couldn't perform oral. When kissed my nipples, his saliva was all over the place. So it was "absolutely horrible". I thought he was too nervous during our first night. Apparently he is just bad at it. Maybe there are women who are too desperate for a man and don't care about the sex but I do.

Did you do anything to help him meet your needs?

How did you tell him you were not a fit?

Of course I tried to help him understand my needs. But it shouldn't be that hard and I certainly have zero interest in having to "teach" a man.
I told him I didn't feel the chemistry. A coupe of months later started a relationship with the right guy. Chemistry is very important. Looking back I remember that same guy who was bad in bed, gave me unpleasant goosebumps when held my hand. I was naive to think that chemistry can be developed over some time. He was a very good guy and I guess I wanted to give it a try because it's not easy to meet kind and generous men.

[Anonymous]

I will add:
Angry men
Men I can't count on

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

In the mean time, I will continue to say that you are fucking idiots. In a few years, you'll be complaining bitterly that you can't find a husband, or that can't get pregnant because it too you to long to get married and you are too old, or that you can't believe your non-geeky DH just knocked up the OW. Keep chasing the cool guys, ladies. Have fun.

No one is looking for "cool guys". If you are looking for decent men and find that certain behavior from your dates raises red flags for you - go with your gut. I want to say that some women also have the same habits as listed on this thread. It depends on what you are willing to overlook and what you are not willing to overlook.

PP, you made a big leap here. It is not necessary for everyone to like geeky guys. It does not translate to "your ovaries will shrivel up" and "your DH will cheat". I also want to comment that thinking a geeky husband will not be an asshole or cheat with OW is pretty delusional. Their geekiness (behaviour and appearance) is not an antidote to cheating.

Right. Who was that guy who overdosed on his yacht with a prostitute? He looked geeky.