If you are rich, do you ever lie about it or downplay it?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You people are making me depressed. I have a dying close family member in another state, and we can't afford for me to take off work (I don't get paid time off) or the travel expenses so that I can go to the funeral. I'm a 32 y.o. working mom of 3. No money in savings due to lots of medical expenses this year.

I don't want to be rich. I don't need yacht clubs. I just want to be able to afford to go to a funeral when someone in my family dies.

Wait for the rich to chime in that you could be rich, too, if only you cancelled your cable.

[Anonymous]

I totally downplay our wealth and try to instill that in our children. I do write the $30k+ check/child for private school and was secretly proud when I overheard DS tell a friend that he couldn't go on the European spring break trip because we are saving money. I do cringe when I hear either DC tell friends we are going to our mountain house for the weekend. We drive our cars for 10 years before passing them on to out of state family and have no desire for the types of cars our friends drive (Lexus, Cadillac, BMW) though we would so enjoy that luxury.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I totally downplay our wealth and try to instill that in our children. I do write the $30k+ check/child for private school and was secretly proud when I overheard DS tell a friend that he couldn't go on the European spring break trip because we are saving money. I do cringe when I hear either DC tell friends we are going to our mountain house for the weekend. We drive our cars for 10 years before passing them on to out of state family and have no desire for the types of cars our friends drive (Lexus, Cadillac, BMW) though we would so enjoy that luxury.

contradictory?

[Anonymous]

I have relatives who are multimillionaires who spend the vast majority of their free time trying to wheedle the cheapest prices on airfares, rental cars, hotel rooms, and whatever they shop for. It's pathological, and I find myself so embarrassed for them.

I know it's how a lot of people stay rich, but it's just unseemly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You people are making me depressed. I have a dying close family member in another state, and we can't afford for me to take off work (I don't get paid time off) or the travel expenses so that I can go to the funeral. I'm a 32 y.o. working mom of 3. No money in savings due to lots of medical expenses this year.

I don't want to be rich. I don't need yacht clubs. I just want to be able to afford to go to a funeral when someone in my family dies.

Wait for the rich to chime in that you could be rich, too, if only you cancelled your cable.

I'm the pp who's family member is drying.

I have things I can sell. I have a LV wallet that was a gift to me a couple of years ago. Never been used - couldn't bring myself to take it out of the box. Wonder how long it would take someone on Craigslist to buy?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You people are making me depressed. I have a dying close family member in another state, and we can't afford for me to take off work (I don't get paid time off) or the travel expenses so that I can go to the funeral. I'm a 32 y.o. working mom of 3. No money in savings due to lots of medical expenses this year.

I don't want to be rich. I don't need yacht clubs. I just want to be able to afford to go to a funeral when someone in my family dies.

Wait for the rich to chime in that you could be rich, too, if only you cancelled your cable.

I'm the pp who's family member is drying.

I have things I can sell. I have a LV wallet that was a gift to me a couple of years ago. Never been used - couldn't bring myself to take it out of the box. Wonder how long it would take someone on Craigslist to buy?

Sorry, I completely hijacked this thread.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a friend that does this. She isn't fooling anyone. In fact, I find it rather patronizing when she does this. First, I'm not stupid. I know what country clubs, private school, real estate, nannies, etc. cost. Second, it's insulting to watch her tiptoe or be evasive about her lifestyle. (I never ask, but she qualifies everything with comments that downplay her wealth). It's as though she thinks I can't handle not having what she has.

You're rich, I'm not. I don't care, why do you?

I have a friend like that. He is always pretending to be "middle class American" It is annoying. Sometimes I have to tell him to cut the s**T. And BTW, you're paying for dinner!

This is exacly what I meant. Once a friend or acquaintence knows you are rich, they expect you to pay all the time, every time. If it's your best friend or family, some rich people don't mind as much. But who wants to pay for an acquaintence all the time?

Also, this thread is not meant to make people sad. I suggest you stop reading these types of threads if you are the jealous type. On the bright side, you can use them as motivation to get rich, but no need to hate.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a friend that does this. She isn't fooling anyone. In fact, I find it rather patronizing when she does this. First, I'm not stupid. I know what country clubs, private school, real estate, nannies, etc. cost. Second, it's insulting to watch her tiptoe or be evasive about her lifestyle. (I never ask, but she qualifies everything with comments that downplay her wealth). It's as though she thinks I can't handle not having what she has.

You're rich, I'm not. I don't care, why do you?

I have a friend like that. He is always pretending to be "middle class American" It is annoying. Sometimes I have to tell him to cut the s**T. And BTW, you're paying for dinner!

This is exacly what I meant. Once a friend or acquaintence knows you are rich, they expect you to pay all the time, every time. If it's your best friend or family, some rich people don't mind as much. But who wants to pay for an acquaintence all the time?

Also, this thread is not meant to make people sad. I suggest you stop reading these types of threads if you are the jealous type. On the bright side, you can use them as motivation to get rich, but no need to hate.

people are getting angry, not sad. reading stupid shit written by rich people makes me feel good about myself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why is that hilarious? I did live in Fairfax. If I say McLean, people may think "Oh, so you are one of those kinds of people"

It's hilarious that your image of McLean is the place where the super rich live (or at least, people rich enough to that they need to lie about their upbringing). It's not Central Park West, for God's sake. It's an affluent suburb, but that's it - not even the most affluent area in the metro area.

The super rich do live here. One of my neighbors is CEO of Northrop Grumman. His annual income is over $35M. That's just his annual HHI. He's not exactly alone.

I do recall a Washingtonian (I believe) article some time ago that pointed out the McLean had most of the highest cost property in the area. Not the highest cost per sq ft, just most of the expensive homes.

Plenty of normal ones, too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a friend that does this. She isn't fooling anyone. In fact, I find it rather patronizing when she does this. First, I'm not stupid. I know what country clubs, private school, real estate, nannies, etc. cost. Second, it's insulting to watch her tiptoe or be evasive about her lifestyle. (I never ask, but she qualifies everything with comments that downplay her wealth). It's as though she thinks I can't handle not having what she has.

You're rich, I'm not. I don't care, why do you?

I have a friend like that. He is always pretending to be "middle class American" It is annoying. Sometimes I have to tell him to cut the s**T. And BTW, you're paying for dinner!

This is exacly what I meant. Once a friend or acquaintence knows you are rich, they expect you to pay all the time, every time. If it's your best friend or family, some rich people don't mind as much. But who wants to pay for an acquaintence all the time?

Also, this thread is not meant to make people sad. I suggest you stop reading these types of threads if you are the jealous type. On the bright side, you can use them as motivation to get rich, but no need to hate.

I'm the first pp. I would never ever expect a rich friend to pay for me. If this friend tried to pay for me, I'd be even more annoyed. I'm not rich, but I can pay for my own damn lunch, dinner, drinks or whatever. I don't need her grandfather to pay for me via her trust fund. I just hate that she thinks I can't handle her wealth. I like her because she's fun and nice and money doesn't change that. Before we had kids, it was never apparent how wealthy she really was. Now that it's more obvious, it's like she's constantly trying to downplay it, but that just brings more attention to it. It's more embarrassing to me than if she would just own it. She's sitting on a mountain of trust fund cash. Lucky her. I just wish she didn't find it so difficult to hang out with people who aren't.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DH and I are in our late twenties and make almost $300k combined. We live in a two bedroom apartment, have no furniture, drive used Hyundais, and don't take vacations - we work all the time. Working makes us happy. The few friends we have would probably shit bricks if we knew how much money we were sitting on.

"Hiding" our income is probably easier due to our ages. (We don't think of it as hiding - we are just not spenders.) At some point, I guess we will probably stretch out legs a bit financially.

Are you planning to have kids? Why haven't you bought a home?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I lie about it all the time. My DH makes an obscene amount of money. I try to avoid questions about it, but I definitely downplay things.

This worked for me until we bought a vacation house.

We have two neighbors both of whom have vacation homes. Both families make a lot less than we do. They did it by cutting their expenses to the bone, having a cheap primary residence and buying a moderate or inexpensive second home. To me, that says both families are frugal but not rich.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why is that hilarious? I did live in Fairfax. If I say McLean, people may think "Oh, so you are one of those kinds of people"

It's hilarious that your image of McLean is the place where the super rich live (or at least, people rich enough to that they need to lie about their upbringing). It's not Central Park West, for God's sake. It's an affluent suburb, but that's it - not even the most affluent area in the metro area.

What Virginia suburb is wealthier? Do you know of a house in McLean that is worth less than a million?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why is that hilarious? I did live in Fairfax. If I say McLean, people may think "Oh, so you are one of those kinds of people"

It's hilarious that your image of McLean is the place where the super rich live (or at least, people rich enough to that they need to lie about their upbringing). It's not Central Park West, for God's sake. It's an affluent suburb, but that's it - not even the most affluent area in the metro area.

What Virginia suburb is wealthier? Do you know of a house in McLean that is worth less than a million?

If you do a search on redfin right now, there are 58 properties (or lots) listed for sale in McLean at less than $1 million.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why is that hilarious? I did live in Fairfax. If I say McLean, people may think "Oh, so you are one of those kinds of people"

It's hilarious that your image of McLean is the place where the super rich live (or at least, people rich enough to that they need to lie about their upbringing). It's not Central Park West, for God's sake. It's an affluent suburb, but that's it - not even the most affluent area in the metro area.

What Virginia suburb is wealthier? Do you know of a house in McLean that is worth less than a million?

Middleburg, the plains...