SEVERE buyer's remorse

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:And where exactly were you when this decision was made?

For us, more space, better schools, greater safety and neighbors who actually take care of their homes and quiet down at a reasonable hour made to the move easy, although I will admit it seemed almost too quiet at night at first. We were used to sirens on our block at least once a week after 11 PM. I never knew if the people in that house really overdosed that often or just thought the EMT guys were cute.

+1

I've lived in NOVA for 4 years and I still miss DC. I miss the city lifestyle - going out to new, trendy restaurants; hopping on the bus/Metro to visit friends; a rowhouse with a small/low maintenance yard, etc.

But when I think about my life now (with two young children), I realize the DC life is not compatible with what is now most important to me - raising a family. DC was best for me as a single person and even as a married person. But now that I'm a mom, I have new priorities. In NOVA the schools are great and my children are going to grow up with the kind of childhood I had - they can play basketball in the cul de sac with neighborhood kids, they can learn to ride bikes in the street and explore trails in nearby parks, they'll go to the school down the road with all the neighborhood kids and not worry about friends getting split up because of the crazy charter process. Our neighborhood in the city was walkable, but I would walk by things on a regular basis that weren't really kid-friendly. Sure, kids in the city may grow up to be more "worldly", but I'd rather protect my child from the drug dealers down the street who hung out on their porch all day long.

Give the suburbs a chance. They really have a lot of positives. I think it's okay to mourn the loss of your city lifestyle, but you can't have it all. You're definitely giving up something, but think about all that you're gaining.

What are you rambling on about?! I am a mom in DC and my kids are my first priority. I live in a 3800 sq ft house with NO drug dealers near it. My kids are happy and well adjusted. They play with friends, all of whom attend different schools. They also have friends in their school. Granted they attend a private school but I am not a big fan of public education these days due to the slavish devotion to standardized testing. If they were in FFC, they would be in private school. My kids also ride their bikes often. So I really don't understand why you can't have kids as a top priority AND live in DC too.

Sorry, us poor folks don't have the pleasure to live like you.

[Anonymous]

OP, think about all of the real restrictions that families in the city have. Not one of my urban friends has more than three kids, and the ones who have three, it is a set of twins after one child. The rest have two kids. It comes down to economics and I would hate to have to live like that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You can get 3800sf in parts of Spring Valley/AU Park these days. Just plan on getting cancer in a few years.....

New to DC. Explain cancer and AU.

The munitions were in spring valley, not AU park. I am not aware of anything ever being found in AU Park. I have seen these statements twice on DCUM but nowhere else. I agree I would not live in Spring Valley out of an abundance of caution even though there is no cancer cluster after the area was investigated.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here, thank you all for these great replies. We have a one year old, ran out of space where we were, and got priced out of larger places in the District. You are so right that I am mourning the end of an era! Lived in the city since 1995 and just never thought I would leave. This move is really a leap of faith that it will be better for the family - more space, terrific elementary in walking distance, no huge mortgage hanging over us. But inside I feel like a toddler throwing a tantrum - don't wanna go!

We recently made the move and OP, I know how you feel. After 20 years in DC and growing up in a soulless suburb of NoVa (I won't name which), our decision to move gave me panic attacks. I always thought we'd raise our child to be a sophisticated urban adventurer, full of confidence and verve. But the schools sucked, and while we were happy with our charter, none of our kid's neighborhood friends went to the same school. Arranging play dates and getting to afterschool activities involved lots of driving - so much for walkability. Our DC neighborhood was full of drug dealers and brothels, gradually giving way to young professionals in group homes. Very few families with kids. Lots of attitude and no sense of responsibility. Litter, vomit and blood stains on the sidewalk. There are some pockets of DC where the neighborhood schools are great but we couldn't afford them. And while I understand the appeal of Capitol Hill, I was afraid of rolling the dice to find a decent middle school when the time came. Anyway, these were our reasons for moving and you have your own. Yet I still mourned my lost ideal of a cultured, vibrant, walkable, diverse, urban life for my child. Fast forward two weeks after the move and we haven't looked back since. Our new neighborhood is full of DC transplants who haven't looked back either. Our kids all ride the bus together. My kid plays outside, rides her bike in the street, walks to her friends' houses and no one locks their doors. Crazy, I know. There is a stronger sense of community and civic responsibility than we ever had in DC. We know our neighbors. We can still walk to the grocery store, dry cleaners, coffee shop, CVS, and the schools are awesome. Sometimes the grass really is greener. OP, I wish you much happiness in your new neighborhood. Congratulations!

+1

I totally agree with you!

+2

i used to have regrets about leaving DC. like we should have stuck it out and made it work. glad to hear there are others like us! my dh and i talk about how you shouldn't have to try so hard to "make it work". living in the city with kids would have been too stressful, while the suburbs are much more comfortable.

[Anonymous]

walkable takes on a new meaning. we walk to friends houses, we walk to the pool, we walk to nature trails., we walk for exercise/peace and feel safe, and we drive a lot of places that just take 5 minutes--tons of ethnic restaurants, libraries, and kid friendly restaurants.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You can get 3800sf in parts of Spring Valley/AU Park these days. Just plan on getting cancer in a few years.....

New to DC. Explain cancer and AU.

The munitions were in spring valley, not AU park. I am not aware of anything ever being found in AU Park. I have seen these statements twice on DCUM but nowhere else. I agree I would not live in Spring Valley out of an abundance of caution even though there is no cancer cluster after the area was investigated.

There was an ambassador's residence in AU park that had found mustard gas--the Korean ambassador I think. Half of AU campus was military barracks and operations center during WW2.

[Anonymous]

omg

At least you fucking have a roof over your head.

smallest violin playing in the background . . .