Is there really any way to have another relationship without destroying the marriage?

[ThatSmileyFaceGuy]

Anonymous wrote:

ThatSmileyFaceGuy wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He might be all flirt and no action, though, as I said. I guess that's safer. Is feeling someone's lust just as good as indulging in it?

It can be, especially if you are unsure if you really want to take it to the next step. Just knowing that you are still sexually desireable to men other then DH, certainly as we get older, can often be enough to encourage you to be the woman that they see. The woman that they lust after.

You know, I would take it to the next step, but not if he's going to be wracked with guilt. I want him to want it as much as I do.

AS to his guilt afterward, who can say. He could agressivly move things forward with you, be with you, and then afterward feel the guilt. You could as well. One thing to remember, is it worth losing him as a freind to sleep with him?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

ThatSmileyFaceGuy wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He might be all flirt and no action, though, as I said. I guess that's safer. Is feeling someone's lust just as good as indulging in it?

It can be, especially if you are unsure if you really want to take it to the next step. Just knowing that you are still sexually desireable to men other then DH, certainly as we get older, can often be enough to encourage you to be the woman that they see. The woman that they lust after.

You know, I would take it to the next step, but not if he's going to be wracked with guilt. I want him to want it as much as I do.

I completely understand that. I'm the PP with the semi-open marriage. Guilt can really ruin it for both parties. That's why I choose to go with honesty even though it can be difficult.

[Anonymous]

I must say, bold as it is, we're not really friends now. No friendship to ruin.

[ThatSmileyFaceGuy]

Anonymous wrote:I must say, bold as it is, we're not really friends now. No friendship to ruin.

So then if you aren't worried about that, then go flirt agressively, enjoy yourself. Either he will or he won't. But, either way you will remember what it feels like to be a sexually confident woman. That could be enough to put the spark back in to your marriage.

[Anonymous]

ThatSmileyFaceGuy wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I must say, bold as it is, we're not really friends now. No friendship to ruin.

So then if you aren't worried about that, then go flirt agressively, enjoy yourself. Either he will or he won't. But, either way you will remember what it feels like to be a sexually confident woman. That could be enough to put the spark back in to your marriage.

It could but it could also ruin the marriage if you fall in love or if you get caught. I'm not judgmental about these things at all. Personally, I think 30, 40, 50 years of strict monogamy is a lot to expect from anyone. But be honest with yourself about the risks.

[Anonymous]

Have you specifically talked about this, or was it vague but definite flirting that has now stopped with no explanation?

[Anonymous]

ThatSmileyFaceGuy wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I must say, bold as it is, we're not really friends now. No friendship to ruin.

So then if you aren't worried about that, then go flirt agressively, enjoy yourself. Either he will or he won't. But, either way you will remember what it feels like to be a sexually confident woman. That could be enough to put the spark back in to your marriage.

I like this advice, thanks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Have you specifically talked about this, or was it vague but definite flirting that has now stopped with no explanation?

We have specifically talked about this. The flirting hasn't stopped. Things just haven't progressed.

[Anonymous]

Got it. Maybe he's all talk.

[Anonymous]

OP, how would your respective children feel if they heard you two talking this way? Can you see the confusion in their eyes when they see you kiss someone who is not their dad?

Would you deliberately harm your kids physically? If not, then don't harm them emotionally and mentally and spiritually.

If you can't stop thinking about yourself long enough to care about your husband and this man's wife, for the love of God, think about your children. When you start fantasizing about him, substitute your sobbing kids the night your husband finds out and leaves in agony while your kids scream "Daddy, why are you leaving?"

[Anonymous]

PP, total buzz kill.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:PP, total buzz kill.

It's all fun and games until you knife a few kids through their souls.

[ThatSmileyFaceGuy]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Have you specifically talked about this, or was it vague but definite flirting that has now stopped with no explanation?

We have specifically talked about this. The flirting hasn't stopped. Things just haven't progressed.

Well then, if you are sure to want to take it further, then make the next move. Get him alone and kiss him.

[Anonymous]

ThatSmileyFaceGuy wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Have you specifically talked about this, or was it vague but definite flirting that has now stopped with no explanation?

We have specifically talked about this. The flirting hasn't stopped. Things just haven't progressed.

Well then, if you are sure to want to take it further, then make the next move. Get him alone and kiss him.

I'll have to think about that. Other than one time, when he gave me a very short ride somewhere, we've never been alone.

[ThatSmileyFaceGuy]

Anonymous wrote:

ThatSmileyFaceGuy wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Have you specifically talked about this, or was it vague but definite flirting that has now stopped with no explanation?

We have specifically talked about this. The flirting hasn't stopped. Things just haven't progressed.

Well then, if you are sure to want to take it further, then make the next move. Get him alone and kiss him.

I'll have to think about that. Other than one time, when he gave me a very short ride somewhere, we've never been alone.

Sure think about it, it's not a decision to be made lightly. As for never being alone, all you need is three minutes to wrap him in your arms and kiss him soundly.