Am I in the wrong here?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It sounds to me like the guy was on the phone. What evidence do you actually have that he was calling 911? And the fact that he was keeping an eye on you and your kid? You should be grateful, not pissed off. He was obviously making sure you weren't doing anything stupid, so lighten up. He was a concerned bystander - we honestly need more people like that.
Also, in the time it took you to walk to get your paper, someone could snatch your kid. Maybe he was making sure no one did that? Why do you assume the worst in this guy? I really don't get it.
And to answer your question, I actually do think that what you did was wrong. Five car widths is still too much to leave a kid unattended in my opinion. I always took my kid out of the car if I'm in public and walking away from the car. It's not that big of a deal when you consider the alternative consequences. But if you really felt that inconvenienced and really wanted a paper, nothing anyone here says to you will matter. But cut the old guy some slack. At the end of the day, he was concerned for your child.

Oh brother, PP! Yes, I'm really sure the OP cared more about the newspaper than her kid. Why do people on DCUM have to be such assholes, seriously.

Not what was said at all. I wonder what made you go there? Because perhaps you're an asshole yourself?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It sounds to me like the guy was on the phone. What evidence do you actually have that he was calling 911? And the fact that he was keeping an eye on you and your kid? You should be grateful, not pissed off. He was obviously making sure you weren't doing anything stupid, so lighten up. He was a concerned bystander - we honestly need more people like that.
Also, in the time it took you to walk to get your paper, someone could snatch your kid. Maybe he was making sure no one did that? Why do you assume the worst in this guy? I really don't get it.
And to answer your question, I actually do think that what you did was wrong. Five car widths is still too much to leave a kid unattended in my opinion. I always took my kid out of the car if I'm in public and walking away from the car. It's not that big of a deal when you consider the alternative consequences. But if you really felt that inconvenienced and really wanted a paper, nothing anyone here says to you will matter. But cut the old guy some slack. At the end of the day, he was concerned for your child.

Oh brother, PP! Yes, I'm really sure the OP cared more about the newspaper than her kid. Why do people on DCUM have to be such assholes, seriously.

Not what was said at all. I wonder what made you go there? Because perhaps you're an asshole yourself?

OK, then, what WERE you trying to imply with that statement? If you don't want your backhanded, snarky replies misinterpreted by the masses, then just spell it out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Holy shit! I really really would hate to live as terrified of baby thieves as y'all are. Your poor children! Overparented, incapable of being alone for all of 15 seconds, never allowed to exercise initiative or judgement?

I'm so glad mine are grown, but now I understand why so few of today's rising adults can cope!

This. Get a grip people.

What if you get your baby out of the car to bring the baby with you to the newspaper box and a car runs both you and your baby over! And if only you had left the baby in the car, then the old man would have at least saved your baby!

Who lives their life like this? Constantly coming up with absurd "what if" scenarios? It sounds exhausting.

Not all of us come up with absurd scenarios or live in fear, we just don't leave the baby alone in the car.

Except that typically when you ask people why they won't leave a baby in the car for 30 seconds or less (while the car is within eyesight the whole time), the absurd scenarios are the reason. Otherwise, what is your reason exactly?

[Anonymous]

I'm curious: what would have happened if you'd been mugged while buying a paper, and knocked unconscious? Or just passed out (it happens)? How long would it have taken for some anonymous passer-by to notice your kid strapped in the car seat, car off, and windows rolled-up?

I'm not even sure the guy overreacted.

There's an observation Feynman made where--when evaluating risk--you don't just have to look at the likelihood of something happening, you have to look at the consequences of that unlikely thing happening. Here the consequences are pretty awful.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It sounds to me like the guy was on the phone. What evidence do you actually have that he was calling 911? And the fact that he was keeping an eye on you and your kid? You should be grateful, not pissed off. He was obviously making sure you weren't doing anything stupid, so lighten up. He was a concerned bystander - we honestly need more people like that.
Also, in the time it took you to walk to get your paper, someone could snatch your kid. Maybe he was making sure no one did that? Why do you assume the worst in this guy? I really don't get it.
And to answer your question, I actually do think that what you did was wrong. Five car widths is still too much to leave a kid unattended in my opinion. I always took my kid out of the car if I'm in public and walking away from the car. It's not that big of a deal when you consider the alternative consequences. But if you really felt that inconvenienced and really wanted a paper, nothing anyone here says to you will matter. But cut the old guy some slack. At the end of the day, he was concerned for your child.

Oh brother, PP! Yes, I'm really sure the OP cared more about the newspaper than her kid. Why do people on DCUM have to be such assholes, seriously.

Not what was said at all. I wonder what made you go there? Because perhaps you're an asshole yourself?

OK, then, what WERE you trying to imply with that statement? If you don't want your backhanded, snarky replies misinterpreted by the masses, then just spell it out.

Do you think that most people who accidentally leave their kid to die in a hot car "don't care about their kid"? Or do you think they just make a really, really bad choice?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm curious: what would have happened if you'd been mugged while buying a paper, and knocked unconscious? Or just passed out (it happens)? How long would it have taken for some anonymous passer-by to notice your kid strapped in the car seat, car off, and windows rolled-up?

I'm not even sure the guy overreacted.

There's an observation Feynman made where--when evaluating risk--you don't just have to look at the likelihood of something happening, you have to look at the consequences of that unlikely thing happening. Here the consequences are pretty awful.

I know, right? You never know what could happen. That's why I never ever ever let my baby out of my sight, even at night when she's asleep in her crib. I mean, what if I was kidnapped by terrorists and my husband spontaneously combusted? I get around this by taping my eyelids open at night and suspending myself over my baby's crib with bungee cords (video monitors can break, you know). CONSTANT VIGILANCE!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm curious: what would have happened if you'd been mugged while buying a paper, and knocked unconscious? Or just passed out (it happens)? How long would it have taken for some anonymous passer-by to notice your kid strapped in the car seat, car off, and windows rolled-up?

I'm not even sure the guy overreacted.

There's an observation Feynman made where--when evaluating risk--you don't just have to look at the likelihood of something happening, you have to look at the consequences of that unlikely thing happening. Here the consequences are pretty awful.

I know, right? You never know what could happen. That's why I never ever ever let my baby out of my sight, even at night when she's asleep in her crib. I mean, what if I was kidnapped by terrorists and my husband spontaneously combusted? I get around this by taping my eyelids open at night and suspending myself over my baby's crib with bungee cords (video monitors can break, you know). CONSTANT VIGILANCE!

Seriously. There are some paranoid people out there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm curious: what would have happened if you'd been mugged while buying a paper, and knocked unconscious? Or just passed out (it happens)? How long would it have taken for some anonymous passer-by to notice your kid strapped in the car seat, car off, and windows rolled-up?

I'm not even sure the guy overreacted.

There's an observation Feynman made where--when evaluating risk--you don't just have to look at the likelihood of something happening, you have to look at the consequences of that unlikely thing happening. Here the consequences are pretty awful.

I know, right? You never know what could happen. That's why I never ever ever let my baby out of my sight, even at night when she's asleep in her crib. I mean, what if I was kidnapped by terrorists and my husband spontaneously combusted? I get around this by taping my eyelids open at night and suspending myself over my baby's crib with bungee cords (video monitors can break, you know). CONSTANT VIGILANCE!

Presumably your husband is there. Also, if you both were to die in your sleep (obviously not going to happen) your child wouldn't be baked to death in a car over a relatively short time.

There's a reason folks get worked up over this stuff--and why people call the police if you leave a *dog* unattended in a car on a hot day, much less a child. No one ever thinks something bad is going to happen to them; that's why it keeps happening to people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It sounds to me like the guy was on the phone. What evidence do you actually have that he was calling 911? And the fact that he was keeping an eye on you and your kid? You should be grateful, not pissed off. He was obviously making sure you weren't doing anything stupid, so lighten up. He was a concerned bystander - we honestly need more people like that.
Also, in the time it took you to walk to get your paper, someone could snatch your kid. Maybe he was making sure no one did that? Why do you assume the worst in this guy? I really don't get it.
And to answer your question, I actually do think that what you did was wrong. Five car widths is still too much to leave a kid unattended in my opinion. I always took my kid out of the car if I'm in public and walking away from the car. It's not that big of a deal when you consider the alternative consequences. But if you really felt that inconvenienced and really wanted a paper, nothing anyone here says to you will matter. But cut the old guy some slack. At the end of the day, he was concerned for your child.

Oh brother, PP! Yes, I'm really sure the OP cared more about the newspaper than her kid. Why do people on DCUM have to be such assholes, seriously.

Not what was said at all. I wonder what made you go there? Because perhaps you're an asshole yourself?

OK, then, what WERE you trying to imply with that statement? If you don't want your backhanded, snarky replies misinterpreted by the masses, then just spell it out.

Do you think that most people who accidentally leave their kid to die in a hot car "don't care about their kid"? Or do you think they just make a really, really bad choice?

First of all, I have never heard of a baby dying in a hot car from someone getting a newspaper from the box. It's ridiculous to even consider this as a possibility.

Read the bolded statement above. "If you felt inconvenienced and really wanted a paper, nothing anyone says here will matter." You're trying to tell me that the subtext of that statement was NOT that "your convenience is more important than your child's safety and you're so stubborn that you would never see otherwise"? Mmmmmkay.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm curious: what would have happened if you'd been mugged while buying a paper, and knocked unconscious? Or just passed out (it happens)? How long would it have taken for some anonymous passer-by to notice your kid strapped in the car seat, car off, and windows rolled-up?

I'm not even sure the guy overreacted.

There's an observation Feynman made where--when evaluating risk--you don't just have to look at the likelihood of something happening, you have to look at the consequences of that unlikely thing happening. Here the consequences are pretty awful.

I know, right? You never know what could happen. That's why I never ever ever let my baby out of my sight, even at night when she's asleep in her crib. I mean, what if I was kidnapped by terrorists and my husband spontaneously combusted? I get around this by taping my eyelids open at night and suspending myself over my baby's crib with bungee cords (video monitors can break, you know). CONSTANT VIGILANCE!

Presumably your husband is there. Also, if you both were to die in your sleep (obviously not going to happen) your child wouldn't be baked to death in a car over a relatively short time.

There's a reason folks get worked up over this stuff--and why people call the police if you leave a *dog* unattended in a car on a hot day, much less a child. No one ever thinks something bad is going to happen to them; that's why it keeps happening to people.

Well, in the scenario I posted, my husband wasn't available due to spontaneous combustion, which could then burn the house down (no one ever thinks this could happen to them UNTIL IT DOES), but whatever. If you really feel that your own personal comfort from sleeping is more important than your child's safety, then there's nothing I can do to convince you otherwise.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm curious: what would have happened if you'd been mugged while buying a paper, and knocked unconscious? Or just passed out (it happens)? How long would it have taken for some anonymous passer-by to notice your kid strapped in the car seat, car off, and windows rolled-up?

I'm not even sure the guy overreacted.

There's an observation Feynman made where--when evaluating risk--you don't just have to look at the likelihood of something happening, you have to look at the consequences of that unlikely thing happening. Here the consequences are pretty awful.

So it's better to be mugged and knocked unconscious while holding your baby? What if the mugger hurts your baby? What if you passed out and fell on top of your baby and crushed her to death?

We could play this game all day, folks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When my kids were infants, yes, I would have brought them with me, even if only 5 spaces away. Not in a snap n go, I didn't have one....I would have either taken them out of their carseat and put them in a Baby Bjorn/sling, or taken the whole car seat with me.

I'd rather have someone over react, then not react at all and a child end up dead.

I agree with this. Give the old guy a break - he was thinking about the safety of your child.

[Anonymous]

Remember that Friends episode when Emma gets locked in the apartment?

http://youtu.be/QUORgpbwBjY

[Anonymous]

Hey folks,

PP here who brought up the specter of children dying in the hot car not because I think that is going to happen in 2 minutes, but maybe the man who witnessed this had it on his mind. He had no idea she was stepping out for a minute. For all he knew she, like others who had totally forgotten their kids were asleep in the car seat, was unaware there was a child in the car. We think this is ridiculous, but the fact is it happens and it is a toally preventable tragedy.

So, I suggest everyone calm down. Whether this mom did anything wrong/that you would/wouldn't do, the point is that someone witnessed this and thought it was important enough to make a call. I personally would prefer someone to call me out on that than the miniscule possibility that I didn't realize my kid was in the car and discovered the hard way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm curious: what would have happened if you'd been mugged while buying a paper, and knocked unconscious? Or just passed out (it happens)? How long would it have taken for some anonymous passer-by to notice your kid strapped in the car seat, car off, and windows rolled-up?

I'm not even sure the guy overreacted.

There's an observation Feynman made where--when evaluating risk--you don't just have to look at the likelihood of something happening, you have to look at the consequences of that unlikely thing happening. Here the consequences are pretty awful.

Then you'd never drive in a car or fly in a plane, right?