So tired of the wait

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We applied early and knew by the end of Nov. I don’t understand why students wait. Do you?

“We applied early”?

Did you apply to college too?

As in family. Parents are paying the tuition.

Yeah, of course they are. Doesn’t change the fact that it’s the kid’s process and the kid’s life.

But you know — you’ve got OP up there stressing about her kids’ applications seemingly more than they are.

Oh give it a rest. Parents can be just as invested (or not, in your case) whether they like to or not. To each their own.

They can. But it doesn’t make it healthy.

I’m so happy my parents didn’t participate in my application process at all.

I plan to stay out of my kid’s process.

You have no child going through this process, and no clue how much it has changed since the 90’s. Yet you are qualified to judge the OP harshly (and repeatedly) in a public forum? Your antipathy towards other parents is what’s unhealthy.

Don’t you have a hobby?

I’m not old enough to have gone to college in the 90s.

I’m just calling you all out for being way too invested in this process.

It’s a pretty rough process with almost nothing in common with when we went to school. This is like being a parent of a toddler and critiquing how people parent their teens. Just hold back until you’ve been there.

Or parents of normal kids critiquing how others parent special needs kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We applied early and knew by the end of Nov. I don’t understand why students wait. Do you?

“We applied early”?

Did you apply to college too?

As in family. Parents are paying the tuition.

Yeah, of course they are. Doesn’t change the fact that it’s the kid’s process and the kid’s life.

But you know — you’ve got OP up there stressing about her kids’ applications seemingly more than they are.

Oh give it a rest. Parents can be just as invested (or not, in your case) whether they like to or not. To each their own.

They can. But it doesn’t make it healthy.

I’m so happy my parents didn’t participate in my application process at all.

I plan to stay out of my kid’s process.

LOL. Wait til your smartest kid decides he wants to study anthropology at Florida Gulf Coast University because he intends to get buff & tan & bang a bunch of babes.

“Oh and by the way, FGCU costs $100,000/yr, so better delay that retirement, dad.”

Not being involved “at all” in the college application process is like buying a house without even seeing a picture of it. When 18 year olds can again afford college on the proceeds of a summer job, parents will happily duck out of the picture.

I was class of 2009 for college. It was expensive.

My parents trusted my college counselor and I to handle it.

and me.

My college counselor and me.

Go eat a praise sandwich, Millennial.
You have no power here.

Go obsess over your kid’s college application, while you talk about how “we’re applying to college.”

I am the poster who said, "I'm so up in my kid's process I'm wearing it as a hat."



We're having fun with it. I'm a widow and single parent, and my kids and I are ride or die. We're a team. We're happy to be alive and on the roller coaster.

Together.

The cool thing about boundaries isn't that they form us into little atomized, self-contained units: It's that they allow us to heal and grow and thrive as individuals while also connecting deeply to others through mutually-supportive shared experiences.

Boundaries aren't cool bc they separate us: It's that they make the healthy "we" possible.

So OF COURSE this process is one we're engaged in together. We all need support and guidance. Some people pay for support; some people find it at school and in their communities; and some people are supported by their families. Some are lucky enough to enjoy a combination.

"We" have separate lives and experiences -- and also go through the rough patches together, and ride the highs together.

And wait -- together.

Also, I'm pretty sure it's appropriate to say "we" since I fully wrote at least 2/3 of their essays on their behalf (gpt did the rest.)

j/k! just funny to see you clench like that lol

But genuinely: I feel sad for those who don't get to have the experience of being a highly-invested, deeply-committed member of another person's team. Or their beloved child's team -- right as they prepare for a really big, significant life transition. It's really pretty great -- though the waiting isssss sooooo lonnnnggggggggggggggg

I love that my kids are fully independent humans who know that they are never, ever in this alone.

We are 10000% a team. 100000% a "we."
And not only do they agree, but they'd wear it on a t-shirt lol.

Ride or die!

Gonna go log back into my kid's portals and refresh for a while. Just for funsies.

Enjoy your weird sense of superiority about being uninvolved while you... troll the college forums on DCUM at noon on a Wednesday.

* LIKE. A. HAT.

lol

Different parent here. This was hilarious and I loved it. Good for you for being an amazing mom and pulling all of this off while being a widow and single mom. You are an inspiration. Wishing good news for your kid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We applied early and knew by the end of Nov. I don’t understand why students wait. Do you?

“We applied early”?

Did you apply to college too?

As in family. Parents are paying the tuition.

Yeah, of course they are. Doesn’t change the fact that it’s the kid’s process and the kid’s life.

But you know — you’ve got OP up there stressing about her kids’ applications seemingly more than they are.

Oh give it a rest. Parents can be just as invested (or not, in your case) whether they like to or not. To each their own.

They can. But it doesn’t make it healthy.

I’m so happy my parents didn’t participate in my application process at all.

I plan to stay out of my kid’s process.

You have already failed. Your kid hasn't even APPLIED to college yet... and here you are on DCUM. Oh man, I wish I knew you in real life and could point out how smug and irritating you were about this process.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DD is also having trouble with the wait. She was rejected ED and has 5 EA acceptances (and one early RD) but is still waiting for 13 schools that don't release until mid-March or later. Most of her friends already know where they're going, and it's hard to hear them planning, finding roommates, etc. But her time will come.

I too am stressing about being able to visit the places we may need to visit in April.

Her time sure will come. Did you not read the recent post that launched the superb phrase “Dork Rumspringa”?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We applied early and knew by the end of Nov. I don’t understand why students wait. Do you?

“We applied early”?

Did you apply to college too?

As in family. Parents are paying the tuition.

Yeah, of course they are. Doesn’t change the fact that it’s the kid’s process and the kid’s life.

But you know — you’ve got OP up there stressing about her kids’ applications seemingly more than they are.

Oh give it a rest. Parents can be just as invested (or not, in your case) whether they like to or not. To each their own.

They can. But it doesn’t make it healthy.

I’m so happy my parents didn’t participate in my application process at all.

I plan to stay out of my kid’s process.

LOL. Wait til your smartest kid decides he wants to study anthropology at Florida Gulf Coast University because he intends to get buff & tan & bang a bunch of babes.

“Oh and by the way, FGCU costs $100,000/yr, so better delay that retirement, dad.”

Not being involved “at all” in the college application process is like buying a house without even seeing a picture of it. When 18 year olds can again afford college on the proceeds of a summer job, parents will happily duck out of the picture.

I was class of 2009 for college. It was expensive.

My parents trusted my college counselor and I to handle it.

Too bad. You might have ended at a better school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We applied early and knew by the end of Nov. I don’t understand why students wait. Do you?

“We applied early”?

Did you apply to college too?

As in family. Parents are paying the tuition.

Yeah, of course they are. Doesn’t change the fact that it’s the kid’s process and the kid’s life.

But you know — you’ve got OP up there stressing about her kids’ applications seemingly more than they are.

Oh give it a rest. Parents can be just as invested (or not, in your case) whether they like to or not. To each their own.

They can. But it doesn’t make it healthy.

I’m so happy my parents didn’t participate in my application process at all.

I plan to stay out of my kid’s process.

LOL. Wait til your smartest kid decides he wants to study anthropology at Florida Gulf Coast University because he intends to get buff & tan & bang a bunch of babes.

“Oh and by the way, FGCU costs $100,000/yr, so better delay that retirement, dad.”

Not being involved “at all” in the college application process is like buying a house without even seeing a picture of it. When 18 year olds can again afford college on the proceeds of a summer job, parents will happily duck out of the picture.

I was class of 2009 for college. It was expensive.

My parents trusted my college counselor and I to handle it.

and me.

My college counselor and me.

Go eat a praise sandwich, Millennial.
You have no power here.

Go obsess over your kid’s college application, while you talk about how “we’re applying to college.”

I am the poster who said, "I'm so up in my kid's process I'm wearing it as a hat."



We're having fun with it. I'm a widow and single parent, and my kids and I are ride or die. We're a team. We're happy to be alive and on the roller coaster.

Together.

The cool thing about boundaries isn't that they form us into little atomized, self-contained units: It's that they allow us to heal and grow and thrive as individuals while also connecting deeply to others through mutually-supportive shared experiences.

Boundaries aren't cool bc they separate us: It's that they make the healthy "we" possible.

So OF COURSE this process is one we're engaged in together. We all need support and guidance. Some people pay for support; some people find it at school and in their communities; and some people are supported by their families. Some are lucky enough to enjoy a combination.

"We" have separate lives and experiences -- and also go through the rough patches together, and ride the highs together.

And wait -- together.

Also, I'm pretty sure it's appropriate to say "we" since I fully wrote at least 2/3 of their essays on their behalf (gpt did the rest.)

j/k! just funny to see you clench like that lol

But genuinely: I feel sad for those who don't get to have the experience of being a highly-invested, deeply-committed member of another person's team. Or their beloved child's team -- right as they prepare for a really big, significant life transition. It's really pretty great -- though the waiting isssss sooooo lonnnnggggggggggggggg

I love that my kids are fully independent humans who know that they are never, ever in this alone.

We are 10000% a team. 100000% a "we."
And not only do they agree, but they'd wear it on a t-shirt lol.

Ride or die!

Gonna go log back into my kid's portals and refresh for a while. Just for funsies.

Enjoy your weird sense of superiority about being uninvolved while you... troll the college forums on DCUM at noon on a Wednesday.

* LIKE. A. HAT.

lol

Different parent here. This was hilarious and I loved it. Good for you for being an amazing mom and pulling all of this off while being a widow and single mom. You are an inspiration. Wishing good news for your kid.

DP. Thank you, PPs. You made me smile.
It has been a rather challenging year for us, but I am lucky that I have close relationships with my college age Greek-life student and my high school senior who will likely have more of a "dork rumspringa" experience (love that). We are definitely a "we" household that respects individuality too.

To the smug millennial:parenting a teen is hard. You have absolutely no idea now what challenges you might face. You might get lucky and have a kid that glides through high school and college.

But usually a kid hits a wall at some point, whether it is social or academic or emotional. I hope you become the kind of parent that your teenage kid trusts enough to engage. (You aren't coming across as that kind of parent now.) There is a difference between being a controlling/anxious helicopter parent and a supportive and engaged parent. I recommend that you try to catch on to those nuances.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DD is also having trouble with the wait. She was rejected ED and has 5 EA acceptances (and one early RD) but is still waiting for 13 schools that don't release until mid-March or later. Most of her friends already know where they're going, and it's hard to hear them planning, finding roommates, etc. But her time will come.

I too am stressing about being able to visit the places we may need to visit in April.

Congrats on the acceptances? Does she have one she’s excited about? My son has also been accepted by half a dozen schools, including one he’s very excited about (w/ merit too) and we’re proceeding as if he’ll be attending that school. We’re waiting for another half dozen reach and far reach schools in the RD. If something works out then, it’s going to be a bonus for him (though it’s likely a fair bit more expensive, so tough choice)!

She likes all of them (and got a lot of merit aid) and is in the running for a full-tuition scholarship at one. We are trying to visit all of them. But if I had to bet, I'd guess she will attend one of the ones she has yet to hear from.

If she’s having trouble with the wait like you said, she may not really like her current all that much, tbh.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DD is also having trouble with the wait. She was rejected ED and has 5 EA acceptances (and one early RD) but is still waiting for 13 schools that don't release until mid-March or later. Most of her friends already know where they're going, and it's hard to hear them planning, finding roommates, etc. But her time will come.

I too am stressing about being able to visit the places we may need to visit in April.

Her next problem will be deciding which school to attend.

Try to help her focus on her success thus far.

And honestly , she should start narrowing down already.

Admitted student days tend to overlap, so it would help her to have a sense of her favorites, among the Admissions.

( I suggest she read posts from current students, and survey results, on UNIGO)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We applied early and knew by the end of Nov. I don’t understand why students wait. Do you?

“We applied early”?

Did you apply to college too?

As in family. Parents are paying the tuition.

Yeah, of course they are. Doesn’t change the fact that it’s the kid’s process and the kid’s life.

But you know — you’ve got OP up there stressing about her kids’ applications seemingly more than they are.

Oh give it a rest. Parents can be just as invested (or not, in your case) whether they like to or not. To each their own.

They can. But it doesn’t make it healthy.

I’m so happy my parents didn’t participate in my application process at all.

I plan to stay out of my kid’s process.

LOL. Wait til your smartest kid decides he wants to study anthropology at Florida Gulf Coast University because he intends to get buff & tan & bang a bunch of babes.

“Oh and by the way, FGCU costs $100,000/yr, so better delay that retirement, dad.”

Not being involved “at all” in the college application process is like buying a house without even seeing a picture of it. When 18 year olds can again afford college on the proceeds of a summer job, parents will happily duck out of the picture.

I was class of 2009 for college. It was expensive.

My parents trusted my college counselor and I to handle it.

and me.

My college counselor and me.

Go eat a praise sandwich, Millennial.
You have no power here.

Go obsess over your kid’s college application, while you talk about how “we’re applying to college.”

I am the poster who said, "I'm so up in my kid's process I'm wearing it as a hat."



We're having fun with it. I'm a widow and single parent, and my kids and I are ride or die. We're a team. We're happy to be alive and on the roller coaster.

Together.

The cool thing about boundaries isn't that they form us into little atomized, self-contained units: It's that they allow us to heal and grow and thrive as individuals while also connecting deeply to others through mutually-supportive shared experiences.

Boundaries aren't cool bc they separate us: It's that they make the healthy "we" possible.

So OF COURSE this process is one we're engaged in together. We all need support and guidance. Some people pay for support; some people find it at school and in their communities; and some people are supported by their families. Some are lucky enough to enjoy a combination.

"We" have separate lives and experiences -- and also go through the rough patches together, and ride the highs together.

And wait -- together.

Also, I'm pretty sure it's appropriate to say "we" since I fully wrote at least 2/3 of their essays on their behalf (gpt did the rest.)

j/k! just funny to see you clench like that lol

But genuinely: I feel sad for those who don't get to have the experience of being a highly-invested, deeply-committed member of another person's team. Or their beloved child's team -- right as they prepare for a really big, significant life transition. It's really pretty great -- though the waiting isssss sooooo lonnnnggggggggggggggg

I love that my kids are fully independent humans who know that they are never, ever in this alone.

We are 10000% a team. 100000% a "we."
And not only do they agree, but they'd wear it on a t-shirt lol.

Ride or die!

Gonna go log back into my kid's portals and refresh for a while. Just for funsies.

Enjoy your weird sense of superiority about being uninvolved while you... troll the college forums on DCUM at noon on a Wednesday.

* LIKE. A. HAT.

lol

Only on DCUM are the choices completely and utterly up your child’s business or uninvolved.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m sorry, but you knew going into this process that RD can take until March for results. Enjoy this lull because once a decision date has been published, your anxiety level will rise again.

NP, and we thought DD was only applying EA but surprised us and submitted 5 RD applications in January. She got in to 5 of her 6 EAs but now we wait. And shockingly, she a mess. Stressed out and overwhelmed. Such a ridiculous process.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It will get exciting again in May/June . I promise. And then so sad because- that’s it. Their childhood is over and they’re leaving. Try to enjoy them now while they are home. You will be glad you did.

That is so so sad. It flies by so quickly

I truly felt grief after my kid graduated. Like after my close family members died. It didn’t last too long but initially it was a cloud of sadness.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We applied early and knew by the end of Nov. I don’t understand why students wait. Do you?

“We applied early”?

Did you apply to college too?

As in family. Parents are paying the tuition.

Yeah, of course they are. Doesn’t change the fact that it’s the kid’s process and the kid’s life.

But you know — you’ve got OP up there stressing about her kids’ applications seemingly more than they are.

Oh give it a rest. Parents can be just as invested (or not, in your case) whether they like to or not. To each their own.

They can. But it doesn’t make it healthy.

I’m so happy my parents didn’t participate in my application process at all.

I plan to stay out of my kid’s process.

LOL. Wait til your smartest kid decides he wants to study anthropology at Florida Gulf Coast University because he intends to get buff & tan & bang a bunch of babes.

“Oh and by the way, FGCU costs $100,000/yr, so better delay that retirement, dad.”

Not being involved “at all” in the college application process is like buying a house without even seeing a picture of it. When 18 year olds can again afford college on the proceeds of a summer job, parents will happily duck out of the picture.

I was class of 2009 for college. It was expensive.

My parents trusted my college counselor and I to handle it.

and me.

My college counselor and me.

Go eat a praise sandwich, Millennial.
You have no power here.

Go obsess over your kid’s college application, while you talk about how “we’re applying to college.”

I am the poster who said, "I'm so up in my kid's process I'm wearing it as a hat."



We're having fun with it. I'm a widow and single parent, and my kids and I are ride or die. We're a team. We're happy to be alive and on the roller coaster.

Together.

The cool thing about boundaries isn't that they form us into little atomized, self-contained units: It's that they allow us to heal and grow and thrive as individuals while also connecting deeply to others through mutually-supportive shared experiences.

Boundaries aren't cool bc they separate us: It's that they make the healthy "we" possible.

So OF COURSE this process is one we're engaged in together. We all need support and guidance. Some people pay for support; some people find it at school and in their communities; and some people are supported by their families. Some are lucky enough to enjoy a combination.

"We" have separate lives and experiences -- and also go through the rough patches together, and ride the highs together.

And wait -- together.

Also, I'm pretty sure it's appropriate to say "we" since I fully wrote at least 2/3 of their essays on their behalf (gpt did the rest.)

j/k! just funny to see you clench like that lol

But genuinely: I feel sad for those who don't get to have the experience of being a highly-invested, deeply-committed member of another person's team. Or their beloved child's team -- right as they prepare for a really big, significant life transition. It's really pretty great -- though the waiting isssss sooooo lonnnnggggggggggggggg

I love that my kids are fully independent humans who know that they are never, ever in this alone.

We are 10000% a team. 100000% a "we."
And not only do they agree, but they'd wear it on a t-shirt lol.

Ride or die!

Gonna go log back into my kid's portals and refresh for a while. Just for funsies.

Enjoy your weird sense of superiority about being uninvolved while you... troll the college forums on DCUM at noon on a Wednesday.

* LIKE. A. HAT.

lol

Only on DCUM are the choices completely and utterly up your child’s business or uninvolved.

I recognize this is a DCUM narrative. What I don't understand is why they push this agenda on an anonymous forum. What satisfaction do they get by doing that?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We applied early and knew by the end of Nov. I don’t understand why students wait. Do you?

“We applied early”?

Did you apply to college too?

As in family. Parents are paying the tuition.

Yeah, of course they are. Doesn’t change the fact that it’s the kid’s process and the kid’s life.

But you know — you’ve got OP up there stressing about her kids’ applications seemingly more than they are.

Oh give it a rest. Parents can be just as invested (or not, in your case) whether they like to or not. To each their own.

They can. But it doesn’t make it healthy.

I’m so happy my parents didn’t participate in my application process at all.

I plan to stay out of my kid’s process.

You have already failed. Your kid hasn't even APPLIED to college yet... and here you are on DCUM. Oh man, I wish I knew you in real life and could point out how smug and irritating you were about this process.

Daymmm. 😂 This is one of the best posts I’ve ever seen on DCUM!! 100% true.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We applied early and knew by the end of Nov. I don’t understand why students wait. Do you?

“We applied early”?

Did you apply to college too?

As in family. Parents are paying the tuition.

Yeah, of course they are. Doesn’t change the fact that it’s the kid’s process and the kid’s life.

But you know — you’ve got OP up there stressing about her kids’ applications seemingly more than they are.

Oh give it a rest. Parents can be just as invested (or not, in your case) whether they like to or not. To each their own.

They can. But it doesn’t make it healthy.

I’m so happy my parents didn’t participate in my application process at all.

I plan to stay out of my kid’s process.

LOL. Wait til your smartest kid decides he wants to study anthropology at Florida Gulf Coast University because he intends to get buff & tan & bang a bunch of babes.

“Oh and by the way, FGCU costs $100,000/yr, so better delay that retirement, dad.”

Not being involved “at all” in the college application process is like buying a house without even seeing a picture of it. When 18 year olds can again afford college on the proceeds of a summer job, parents will happily duck out of the picture.

I was class of 2009 for college. It was expensive.

My parents trusted my college counselor and I to handle it.

and me.

My college counselor and me.

Go eat a praise sandwich, Millennial.
You have no power here.

Go obsess over your kid’s college application, while you talk about how “we’re applying to college.”

I am the poster who said, "I'm so up in my kid's process I'm wearing it as a hat."



We're having fun with it. I'm a widow and single parent, and my kids and I are ride or die. We're a team. We're happy to be alive and on the roller coaster.

Together.

The cool thing about boundaries isn't that they form us into little atomized, self-contained units: It's that they allow us to heal and grow and thrive as individuals while also connecting deeply to others through mutually-supportive shared experiences.

Boundaries aren't cool bc they separate us: It's that they make the healthy "we" possible.

So OF COURSE this process is one we're engaged in together. We all need support and guidance. Some people pay for support; some people find it at school and in their communities; and some people are supported by their families. Some are lucky enough to enjoy a combination.

"We" have separate lives and experiences -- and also go through the rough patches together, and ride the highs together.

And wait -- together.

Also, I'm pretty sure it's appropriate to say "we" since I fully wrote at least 2/3 of their essays on their behalf (gpt did the rest.)

j/k! just funny to see you clench like that lol

But genuinely: I feel sad for those who don't get to have the experience of being a highly-invested, deeply-committed member of another person's team. Or their beloved child's team -- right as they prepare for a really big, significant life transition. It's really pretty great -- though the waiting isssss sooooo lonnnnggggggggggggggg

I love that my kids are fully independent humans who know that they are never, ever in this alone.

We are 10000% a team. 100000% a "we."
And not only do they agree, but they'd wear it on a t-shirt lol.

Ride or die!

Gonna go log back into my kid's portals and refresh for a while. Just for funsies.

Enjoy your weird sense of superiority about being uninvolved while you... troll the college forums on DCUM at noon on a Wednesday.

* LIKE. A. HAT.

lol

Only on DCUM are the choices completely and utterly up your child’s business or uninvolved.

I recognize this is a DCUM narrative. What I don't understand is why they push this agenda on an anonymous forum. What satisfaction do they get by doing that?

It’s only pushed by those who are up their child’s business. Easier to defend it if the alternative is emotional abandonment as they seem to think it is.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We applied early and knew by the end of Nov. I don’t understand why students wait. Do you?

“We applied early”?

Did you apply to college too?

As in family. Parents are paying the tuition.

Yeah, of course they are. Doesn’t change the fact that it’s the kid’s process and the kid’s life.

But you know — you’ve got OP up there stressing about her kids’ applications seemingly more than they are.

Oh give it a rest. Parents can be just as invested (or not, in your case) whether they like to or not. To each their own.

They can. But it doesn’t make it healthy.

I’m so happy my parents didn’t participate in my application process at all.

I plan to stay out of my kid’s process.

LOL. Wait til your smartest kid decides he wants to study anthropology at Florida Gulf Coast University because he intends to get buff & tan & bang a bunch of babes.

“Oh and by the way, FGCU costs $100,000/yr, so better delay that retirement, dad.”

Not being involved “at all” in the college application process is like buying a house without even seeing a picture of it. When 18 year olds can again afford college on the proceeds of a summer job, parents will happily duck out of the picture.

I was class of 2009 for college. It was expensive.

My parents trusted my college counselor and I to handle it.

and me.

My college counselor and me.

Go eat a praise sandwich, Millennial.
You have no power here.

Go obsess over your kid’s college application, while you talk about how “we’re applying to college.”

I am the poster who said, "I'm so up in my kid's process I'm wearing it as a hat."



We're having fun with it. I'm a widow and single parent, and my kids and I are ride or die. We're a team. We're happy to be alive and on the roller coaster.

Together.

The cool thing about boundaries isn't that they form us into little atomized, self-contained units: It's that they allow us to heal and grow and thrive as individuals while also connecting deeply to others through mutually-supportive shared experiences.

Boundaries aren't cool bc they separate us: It's that they make the healthy "we" possible.

So OF COURSE this process is one we're engaged in together. We all need support and guidance. Some people pay for support; some people find it at school and in their communities; and some people are supported by their families. Some are lucky enough to enjoy a combination.

"We" have separate lives and experiences -- and also go through the rough patches together, and ride the highs together.

And wait -- together.

Also, I'm pretty sure it's appropriate to say "we" since I fully wrote at least 2/3 of their essays on their behalf (gpt did the rest.)

j/k! just funny to see you clench like that lol

But genuinely: I feel sad for those who don't get to have the experience of being a highly-invested, deeply-committed member of another person's team. Or their beloved child's team -- right as they prepare for a really big, significant life transition. It's really pretty great -- though the waiting isssss sooooo lonnnnggggggggggggggg

I love that my kids are fully independent humans who know that they are never, ever in this alone.

We are 10000% a team. 100000% a "we."
And not only do they agree, but they'd wear it on a t-shirt lol.

Ride or die!

Gonna go log back into my kid's portals and refresh for a while. Just for funsies.

Enjoy your weird sense of superiority about being uninvolved while you... troll the college forums on DCUM at noon on a Wednesday.

* LIKE. A. HAT.

lol

You’re hilarious! And awesome!! Guessing your kids are, too. Thanks so much for weighing in.

Btw, I’m gonna steal “LIKE. A. HAT.” 😜