Gonzaga, Georgetown Prep, Langdon, Saint Anslems, St. Albans

[Anonymous]

Minority, middle-class family at Prep. Son loves the school and has thrived. I’ve found it challenging to befriend the other mothers but that’s my issue, not my son’s. Agree with previous posts that socio-economic status plays a bigger role than race.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:STA is run by CCC and Congo members. Big emphasis on status and wealth among parents though it varies by grade. Some forms have down to earth parents. Others might have a heavy concentration of the 4 Cs. We had boys in 2 forms and parent culture was night and day.

Different with the boys. You have some privileged white kids but they are kept in check for the most part because the culture among the boys values in this order 1) athletic prowess, 2) academic achievement, 3) sense of humor, 4) other talents, 5) parent status and money.

Not gonna lie. Black and Asian boys will hear stupid stuff and be on the receiving end of micro aggressions.School is not great at acknowledging or dealing with it. DEI director means well but is ineffectual. Few if any Latino or Native American boys. Zero in my boys’ grades. Interestingly among the Asians there are many white/Asian mixed kids.

Teachers are the great equalizer. They reward merit and don’t know or care about parent status. There a few conservatives in the history department but more political than racial. Overall teaching quality is strong in Upper School. The teachers made the school.

The admin is a mixed bag. HOS expresses liberal DEI thoughts but is terrified of the wealthy MAGA crowd. Anything explicit and overt admin will respond to. A boy was expelled a couple years ago for using a racial slur. More subtle and structural stuff they let slide. Eg. Lower School head favors white students but he can’t affect grades or appoint student leaders. It affects tone but not opportunities.

OTH, the focus at STA is on boys learning and the school promotes values without going overboard woke the way they do at Sidwell and GDS.

OP here - thank you so much for this thoughtful post. This is exactly what I was looking for. I appreciate you taking the time to truly hear what I was asking for and respond accordingly.

Very good post! My son recently graduated (last 2 yrs) as a white kid from a middle class, liberal family. All I can add as a white person is a strong agreement with the above hierarchy of values, although I would put athletic prowess and academic achievement as tied for most important among the boys. It is very respected and cool to be a high academic achiever as long as you don't brag about it.
1) athletic prowess, 1) academic achievement, 3) sense of humor, 4) other talents, 5) parent status and money.
The boys (especially at the high school level) really don't care who has money. My son was completely accepted by the boys and his friends' parents despite our lack of big money, prestige jobs or club memberships.

NP. Agree class and clubs are important. They may be "friends" with the black kids and lower class kids but no they are not flying to Nantucket with them or golfing with them. Very white wealthy experiences that your kid will be left out of. Family gatherings at the Met Club and Chevy and Congo happen often and you won't be part of that either. It does affect the kids left out.

You will get the same level of academic rigor and strong friendships for life at the Abbey. We know both schools well as well as the entire big three scene plus others like Landon via extended family. Minus on the Abbey side is less sports culture if this is important to your child. (We view this as a plus, though) and much, much, much less materialistic BS (a huge plus for us, and a major draw for us to this school over STA and others.) This means there is so much more social cohesion. We drive a 10 year old modest car to dropoff and don't feel out of place. We are so happy that our child can get a great education without the wealth/class baggage on offer elsewhere.

We have not found the Abbey to be a place with hostile attitudes towards anyone. Our child's class is majority students of color and the atmosphere is positive and supportive for everyone.

OP here - thanks for providing your perspective on the Abbey. How many classes are there per grade in highschool (or is that not really a thing to separate by class/homeroom)? I ask since you mentioned that your son's class was majority students of color. I'm pleasantly surprised to hear that. Do you find that the students of color mingle uniformly or self-segregate into their different groups? I don't have a judgment about it either way, I'm just curious?

Additionally, I've heard that all Abbey classes are taught at the AP level. Is this true? I'm a little concerned about that as in my mind, I equate that to mean that every class a student takes there is proceeding at a very rapid pace, which may impact depth of understanding for those who maybe can't keep up if every class is taught at a fast pace.

Finally, I believe that the Abbey high school class size is smaller than the other schools I listed for highschool. Have you found it to be too small for your son? Is this something he has voiced (perhaps if he started in middle school)?

Each grade is small - apx 30-40 kids. I think this makes it harder for kids to develop groups and cliques. They also have a house system so that kids mix across grades. My son has friends from all different demographics - Black, Asian, Latino, and white. He has Catholic friends, AME friends, Jewish friends, Protestant friends and agnostic friends. They are spread out across the DMV. It is really hard to tell income levels of the kids, this is not a focus among parents or kids. Classes are rigorous, and I think there is something on the website about what they are looking for. Teachers will offer help and support, though. Hope this helps you - the best thing is to really look at all the schools on your list, do shadow days, etc. You and your child will start to feel more drawn to some than others and will make your way to just the right spot.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:STA is run by CCC and Congo members. Big emphasis on status and wealth among parents though it varies by grade. Some forms have down to earth parents. Others might have a heavy concentration of the 4 Cs. We had boys in 2 forms and parent culture was night and day.

Different with the boys. You have some privileged white kids but they are kept in check for the most part because the culture among the boys values in this order 1) athletic prowess, 2) academic achievement, 3) sense of humor, 4) other talents, 5) parent status and money.

Not gonna lie. Black and Asian boys will hear stupid stuff and be on the receiving end of micro aggressions.School is not great at acknowledging or dealing with it. DEI director means well but is ineffectual. Few if any Latino or Native American boys. Zero in my boys’ grades. Interestingly among the Asians there are many white/Asian mixed kids.

Teachers are the great equalizer. They reward merit and don’t know or care about parent status. There a few conservatives in the history department but more political than racial. Overall teaching quality is strong in Upper School. The teachers made the school.

The admin is a mixed bag. HOS expresses liberal DEI thoughts but is terrified of the wealthy MAGA crowd. Anything explicit and overt admin will respond to. A boy was expelled a couple years ago for using a racial slur. More subtle and structural stuff they let slide. Eg. Lower School head favors white students but he can’t affect grades or appoint student leaders. It affects tone but not opportunities.

OTH, the focus at STA is on boys learning and the school promotes values without going overboard woke the way they do at Sidwell and GDS.

OP here - thank you so much for this thoughtful post. This is exactly what I was looking for. I appreciate you taking the time to truly hear what I was asking for and respond accordingly.

Very good post! My son recently graduated (last 2 yrs) as a white kid from a middle class, liberal family. All I can add as a white person is a strong agreement with the above hierarchy of values, although I would put athletic prowess and academic achievement as tied for most important among the boys. It is very respected and cool to be a high academic achiever as long as you don't brag about it.
1) athletic prowess, 1) academic achievement, 3) sense of humor, 4) other talents, 5) parent status and money.
The boys (especially at the high school level) really don't care who has money. My son was completely accepted by the boys and his friends' parents despite our lack of big money, prestige jobs or club memberships.

NP. Agree class and clubs are important. They may be "friends" with the black kids and lower class kids but no they are not flying to Nantucket with them or golfing with them. Very white wealthy experiences that your kid will be left out of. Family gatherings at the Met Club and Chevy and Congo happen often and you won't be part of that either. It does affect the kids left out.

You will get the same level of academic rigor and strong friendships for life at the Abbey. We know both schools well as well as the entire big three scene plus others like Landon via extended family. Minus on the Abbey side is less sports culture if this is important to your child. (We view this as a plus, though) and much, much, much less materialistic BS (a huge plus for us, and a major draw for us to this school over STA and others.) This means there is so much more social cohesion. We drive a 10 year old modest car to dropoff and don't feel out of place. We are so happy that our child can get a great education without the wealth/class baggage on offer elsewhere.

We have not found the Abbey to be a place with hostile attitudes towards anyone. Our child's class is majority students of color and the atmosphere is positive and supportive for everyone.

OP here - thanks for providing your perspective on the Abbey. How many classes are there per grade in highschool (or is that not really a thing to separate by class/homeroom)? I ask since you mentioned that your son's class was majority students of color. I'm pleasantly surprised to hear that. Do you find that the students of color mingle uniformly or self-segregate into their different groups? I don't have a judgment about it either way, I'm just curious?

Additionally, I've heard that all Abbey classes are taught at the AP level. Is this true? I'm a little concerned about that as in my mind, I equate that to mean that every class a student takes there is proceeding at a very rapid pace, which may impact depth of understanding for those who maybe can't keep up if every class is taught at a fast pace.

Finally, I believe that the Abbey high school class size is smaller than the other schools I listed for highschool. Have you found it to be too small for your son? Is this something he has voiced (perhaps if he started in middle school)?

Each grade is small - apx 30-40 kids. I think this makes it harder for kids to develop groups and cliques. They also have a house system so that kids mix across grades. My son has friends from all different demographics - Black, Asian, Latino, and white. He has Catholic friends, AME friends, Jewish friends, Protestant friends and agnostic friends. They are spread out across the DMV. It is really hard to tell income levels of the kids, this is not a focus among parents or kids. Classes are rigorous, and I think there is something on the website about what they are looking for. Teachers will offer help and support, though. Hope this helps you - the best thing is to really look at all the schools on your list, do shadow days, etc. You and your child will start to feel more drawn to some than others and will make your way to just the right spot.

OP here - thank you for sharing this. I very much appreciate it. I agree, I think it will become clearer as we get further along in the application (and acceptance process). We have some friends at Saint Anslems so have some direct feedback on that school, which is why I didn't want/need this thread to go off the rails re. Their college placements. I don't have as much knowledge about the other schools on our list. We are visiting them now. What's interesting is that we've visited one or two and have gotten a good vibe, but then hear from friends that they have friends who may have had terrible experiences at a school that we just had a lovely experience at the open house. Hence the creation of this thread.

I'm hoping those at the schools can share their honest, thoughtful experience about their schools. No school is perfect. So I'm hoping to get real, honest feedback. For example, I've heard first hand that the level of homework at Saint Anslems is intense. Much more initially than the number of hours they suggest. I'd hope that posters from the school would have shared that here. When does it get better? Do you honestly wish it was less? In the end, was the homework worth it? That's the type of insight I'm hoping for. The posters from St. Albans both gave truly thoughtful, honest feedback re. their experiences, which I very much appreciated.

[Anonymous]

Hi OP. This is my son’s 5th year at the Abbey and I’ve heard from many parents, including those that have multiple boys there, that the homework level really depends on the boy. My son is at the top of his class and gets most of his homework done on the metro with maybe 30-60min more at home. He’ll maybe do 2-4 hours on the weekends. I’ve heard other parents say the same. I don’t think my son is a genius but he is really motivated to get the work done fast so he can do stuff he enjoys more. Just wanted to share a different perspective. That said, he doesn’t have a lot of extracurricular commitments - that could be challenging.

[Anonymous]

There is definitely homework at the Abbey. In the case of my son, he has only had trouble with one subject.he gets frustrated sometimes with that it overall it is ok. I think this is for two reasons: he was bored out of his mind in public school and appreciate the challenge. FWIW, I haven’t seen any homework assignments that are kind of meaningless busy work. And the second thing is he understands that if he wants to participate in a place that is as unique and welcoming is the Abbey then homework is the thing that he needs to do to stay there. He is more than happy to do that.

[Anonymous]

When we set out to find the right all-boys school for our son, we knew exactly what we wanted:

Strong academics.
Catholic values—or something like that.
A sense of brotherhood.
And, of course, diversity.

The kind of diversity that looks great on a website but still feels reassuring when you drop your kid off in the morning.

We first toured DeMatha, and it was…energetic. So much energy! So much music! So much art! So much personality! My husband whispered, “You can feel the brotherhood.” I whispered back, “You can feel the brotherhood.” We loved it, but ultimately felt our son might “get lost in the crowd,” which was code for “we didn’t see anyone else from country club.”

At Gonzaga, we were told the boys learn to serve others and challenge injustice. The admissions director proudly noted, “Our student body is one of the most diverse among Jesuit schools.” We nodded enthusiastically, pretending not to notice that “diverse” apparently meant “one student of color for every four rowing shells.”

Georgetown Prep felt comfortable. There was a Starbucks nearby, and the campus had a pond that whispered “legacy.” The admissions video featured boys of every background, each one talking about leadership while standing in front of brick architecture that probably cost more than our house. When they mentioned their “global perspective,” my husband teared up a little. He studied abroad once, in London.

St. Albans impressed us with its charm and Episcopalian restraint. “We’re 43% students of color,” the headmaster said, his smile both humble and rehearsed. We loved the number. It sounded like justice with manners.

At Landon, the admissions office described the school as “evolving.” We took that to mean “still figuring out how to talk about diversity without whispering it.” Our tour guide said they had “a lot more public school kids now,” which we took as a warning.

Then there was St. Anselm’s—small, earnest, and full of genuine tradition. Actual monks! Our son said it felt “too quiet.” We said that was the sound of discernment. He rolled his eyes. We took that as spiritual growth.

In the end, we chose a school that “values diversity” while “maintaining rigorous standards,” which is parental shorthand for some variety, same comfort level. We tell our friends it was the perfect balance of tradition and inclusion.

And every time the newsletter features our son in a group photo next to a boy named Alejandro, we proudly forward it to everyone: “Look at this! This is the future!”

We mean it, too. We just hope the future still has a good lacrosse program.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When we set out to find the right all-boys school for our son, we knew exactly what we wanted:

Strong academics.
Catholic values—or something like that.
A sense of brotherhood.
And, of course, diversity.

The kind of diversity that looks great on a website but still feels reassuring when you drop your kid off in the morning.

We first toured DeMatha, and it was…energetic. So much energy! So much music! So much art! So much personality! My husband whispered, “You can feel the brotherhood.” I whispered back, “You can feel the brotherhood.” We loved it, but ultimately felt our son might “get lost in the crowd,” which was code for “we didn’t see anyone else from country club.”

At Gonzaga, we were told the boys learn to serve others and challenge injustice. The admissions director proudly noted, “Our student body is one of the most diverse among Jesuit schools.” We nodded enthusiastically, pretending not to notice that “diverse” apparently meant “one student of color for every four rowing shells.”

Georgetown Prep felt comfortable. There was a Starbucks nearby, and the campus had a pond that whispered “legacy.” The admissions video featured boys of every background, each one talking about leadership while standing in front of brick architecture that probably cost more than our house. When they mentioned their “global perspective,” my husband teared up a little. He studied abroad once, in London.

St. Albans impressed us with its charm and Episcopalian restraint. “We’re 43% students of color,” the headmaster said, his smile both humble and rehearsed. We loved the number. It sounded like justice with manners.

At Landon, the admissions office described the school as “evolving.” We took that to mean “still figuring out how to talk about diversity without whispering it.” Our tour guide said they had “a lot more public school kids now,” which we took as a warning.

Then there was St. Anselm’s—small, earnest, and full of genuine tradition. Actual monks! Our son said it felt “too quiet.” We said that was the sound of discernment. He rolled his eyes. We took that as spiritual growth.

In the end, we chose a school that “values diversity” while “maintaining rigorous standards,” which is parental shorthand for some variety, same comfort level. We tell our friends it was the perfect balance of tradition and inclusion.

And every time the newsletter features our son in a group photo next to a boy named Alejandro, we proudly forward it to everyone: “Look at this! This is the future!”

We mean it, too. We just hope the future still has a good lacrosse program.

OP here - what a great post! Thanks for this perspective on all the schools that you visited. If I were to guess, based on what you wrote, did you end up at Georgetown Prep?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When we set out to find the right all-boys school for our son, we knew exactly what we wanted:

Strong academics.
Catholic values—or something like that.
A sense of brotherhood.
And, of course, diversity.

The kind of diversity that looks great on a website but still feels reassuring when you drop your kid off in the morning.

We first toured DeMatha, and it was…energetic. So much energy! So much music! So much art! So much personality! My husband whispered, “You can feel the brotherhood.” I whispered back, “You can feel the brotherhood.” We loved it, but ultimately felt our son might “get lost in the crowd,” which was code for “we didn’t see anyone else from country club.”

At Gonzaga, we were told the boys learn to serve others and challenge injustice. The admissions director proudly noted, “Our student body is one of the most diverse among Jesuit schools.” We nodded enthusiastically, pretending not to notice that “diverse” apparently meant “one student of color for every four rowing shells.”

Georgetown Prep felt comfortable. There was a Starbucks nearby, and the campus had a pond that whispered “legacy.” The admissions video featured boys of every background, each one talking about leadership while standing in front of brick architecture that probably cost more than our house. When they mentioned their “global perspective,” my husband teared up a little. He studied abroad once, in London.

St. Albans impressed us with its charm and Episcopalian restraint. “We’re 43% students of color,” the headmaster said, his smile both humble and rehearsed. We loved the number. It sounded like justice with manners.

At Landon, the admissions office described the school as “evolving.” We took that to mean “still figuring out how to talk about diversity without whispering it.” Our tour guide said they had “a lot more public school kids now,” which we took as a warning.

Then there was St. Anselm’s—small, earnest, and full of genuine tradition. Actual monks! Our son said it felt “too quiet.” We said that was the sound of discernment. He rolled his eyes. We took that as spiritual growth.

In the end, we chose a school that “values diversity” while “maintaining rigorous standards,” which is parental shorthand for some variety, same comfort level. We tell our friends it was the perfect balance of tradition and inclusion.

And every time the newsletter features our son in a group photo next to a boy named Alejandro, we proudly forward it to everyone: “Look at this! This is the future!”

We mean it, too. We just hope the future still has a good lacrosse program.

OP here - what a great post! Thanks for this perspective on all the schools that you visited. If I were to guess, based on what you wrote, did you end up at Georgetown Prep?

Nice guess, but, no. I said, "good lacrosse program."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When we set out to find the right all-boys school for our son, we knew exactly what we wanted:

Strong academics.
Catholic values—or something like that.
A sense of brotherhood.
And, of course, diversity.

The kind of diversity that looks great on a website but still feels reassuring when you drop your kid off in the morning.

We first toured DeMatha, and it was…energetic. So much energy! So much music! So much art! So much personality! My husband whispered, “You can feel the brotherhood.” I whispered back, “You can feel the brotherhood.” We loved it, but ultimately felt our son might “get lost in the crowd,” which was code for “we didn’t see anyone else from country club.”

At Gonzaga, we were told the boys learn to serve others and challenge injustice. The admissions director proudly noted, “Our student body is one of the most diverse among Jesuit schools.” We nodded enthusiastically, pretending not to notice that “diverse” apparently meant “one student of color for every four rowing shells.”

Georgetown Prep felt comfortable. There was a Starbucks nearby, and the campus had a pond that whispered “legacy.” The admissions video featured boys of every background, each one talking about leadership while standing in front of brick architecture that probably cost more than our house. When they mentioned their “global perspective,” my husband teared up a little. He studied abroad once, in London.

St. Albans impressed us with its charm and Episcopalian restraint. “We’re 43% students of color,” the headmaster said, his smile both humble and rehearsed. We loved the number. It sounded like justice with manners.

At Landon, the admissions office described the school as “evolving.” We took that to mean “still figuring out how to talk about diversity without whispering it.” Our tour guide said they had “a lot more public school kids now,” which we took as a warning.

Then there was St. Anselm’s—small, earnest, and full of genuine tradition. Actual monks! Our son said it felt “too quiet.” We said that was the sound of discernment. He rolled his eyes. We took that as spiritual growth.

In the end, we chose a school that “values diversity” while “maintaining rigorous standards,” which is parental shorthand for some variety, same comfort level. We tell our friends it was the perfect balance of tradition and inclusion.

And every time the newsletter features our son in a group photo next to a boy named Alejandro, we proudly forward it to everyone: “Look at this! This is the future!”

We mean it, too. We just hope the future still has a good lacrosse program.

OP here - what a great post! Thanks for this perspective on all the schools that you visited. If I were to guess, based on what you wrote, did you end up at Georgetown Prep?

(It was satire)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DS is a minority and has had a great experience at Prep. I know Prep has a reputation of being a Waspy jock school. While there are certainly kids who fit that profile, many kids at Prep don’t and still find their people.

15% of kids at Prep are international students and board at the school. This contributes significantly to the diversity of the student body.

WASPs would be aghast at the notion they attend a Catholic school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When we set out to find the right all-boys school for our son, we knew exactly what we wanted:

Strong academics.
Catholic values—or something like that.
A sense of brotherhood.
And, of course, diversity.

The kind of diversity that looks great on a website but still feels reassuring when you drop your kid off in the morning.

We first toured DeMatha, and it was…energetic. So much energy! So much music! So much art! So much personality! My husband whispered, “You can feel the brotherhood.” I whispered back, “You can feel the brotherhood.” We loved it, but ultimately felt our son might “get lost in the crowd,” which was code for “we didn’t see anyone else from country club.”

At Gonzaga, we were told the boys learn to serve others and challenge injustice. The admissions director proudly noted, “Our student body is one of the most diverse among Jesuit schools.” We nodded enthusiastically, pretending not to notice that “diverse” apparently meant “one student of color for every four rowing shells.”

Georgetown Prep felt comfortable. There was a Starbucks nearby, and the campus had a pond that whispered “legacy.” The admissions video featured boys of every background, each one talking about leadership while standing in front of brick architecture that probably cost more than our house. When they mentioned their “global perspective,” my husband teared up a little. He studied abroad once, in London.

St. Albans impressed us with its charm and Episcopalian restraint. “We’re 43% students of color,” the headmaster said, his smile both humble and rehearsed. We loved the number. It sounded like justice with manners.

At Landon, the admissions office described the school as “evolving.” We took that to mean “still figuring out how to talk about diversity without whispering it.” Our tour guide said they had “a lot more public school kids now,” which we took as a warning.

Then there was St. Anselm’s—small, earnest, and full of genuine tradition. Actual monks! Our son said it felt “too quiet.” We said that was the sound of discernment. He rolled his eyes. We took that as spiritual growth.

In the end, we chose a school that “values diversity” while “maintaining rigorous standards,” which is parental shorthand for some variety, same comfort level. We tell our friends it was the perfect balance of tradition and inclusion.

And every time the newsletter features our son in a group photo next to a boy named Alejandro, we proudly forward it to everyone: “Look at this! This is the future!”

We mean it, too. We just hope the future still has a good lacrosse program.

OP here - what a great post! Thanks for this perspective on all the schools that you visited. If I were to guess, based on what you wrote, did you end up at Georgetown Prep?

Nice guess, but, no. I said, "good lacrosse program."

No school mentioned has a particularly good lacrosse program.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When we set out to find the right all-boys school for our son, we knew exactly what we wanted:

Strong academics.
Catholic values—or something like that.
A sense of brotherhood.
And, of course, diversity.

The kind of diversity that looks great on a website but still feels reassuring when you drop your kid off in the morning.

We first toured DeMatha, and it was…energetic. So much energy! So much music! So much art! So much personality! My husband whispered, “You can feel the brotherhood.” I whispered back, “You can feel the brotherhood.” We loved it, but ultimately felt our son might “get lost in the crowd,” which was code for “we didn’t see anyone else from country club.”

At Gonzaga, we were told the boys learn to serve others and challenge injustice. The admissions director proudly noted, “Our student body is one of the most diverse among Jesuit schools.” We nodded enthusiastically, pretending not to notice that “diverse” apparently meant “one student of color for every four rowing shells.”

Georgetown Prep felt comfortable. There was a Starbucks nearby, and the campus had a pond that whispered “legacy.” The admissions video featured boys of every background, each one talking about leadership while standing in front of brick architecture that probably cost more than our house. When they mentioned their “global perspective,” my husband teared up a little. He studied abroad once, in London.

St. Albans impressed us with its charm and Episcopalian restraint. “We’re 43% students of color,” the headmaster said, his smile both humble and rehearsed. We loved the number. It sounded like justice with manners.

At Landon, the admissions office described the school as “evolving.” We took that to mean “still figuring out how to talk about diversity without whispering it.” Our tour guide said they had “a lot more public school kids now,” which we took as a warning.

Then there was St. Anselm’s—small, earnest, and full of genuine tradition. Actual monks! Our son said it felt “too quiet.” We said that was the sound of discernment. He rolled his eyes. We took that as spiritual growth.

In the end, we chose a school that “values diversity” while “maintaining rigorous standards,” which is parental shorthand for some variety, same comfort level. We tell our friends it was the perfect balance of tradition and inclusion.

And every time the newsletter features our son in a group photo next to a boy named Alejandro, we proudly forward it to everyone: “Look at this! This is the future!”

We mean it, too. We just hope the future still has a good lacrosse program.

OP here - what a great post! Thanks for this perspective on all the schools that you visited. If I were to guess, based on what you wrote, did you end up at Georgetown Prep?

Nice guess, but, no. I said, "good lacrosse program."

No school mentioned has a particularly good lacrosse program.

lol, all but St Anselms do actually.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When we set out to find the right all-boys school for our son, we knew exactly what we wanted:

Strong academics.
Catholic values—or something like that.
A sense of brotherhood.
And, of course, diversity.

The kind of diversity that looks great on a website but still feels reassuring when you drop your kid off in the morning.

We first toured DeMatha, and it was…energetic. So much energy! So much music! So much art! So much personality! My husband whispered, “You can feel the brotherhood.” I whispered back, “You can feel the brotherhood.” We loved it, but ultimately felt our son might “get lost in the crowd,” which was code for “we didn’t see anyone else from country club.”

At Gonzaga, we were told the boys learn to serve others and challenge injustice. The admissions director proudly noted, “Our student body is one of the most diverse among Jesuit schools.” We nodded enthusiastically, pretending not to notice that “diverse” apparently meant “one student of color for every four rowing shells.”

Georgetown Prep felt comfortable. There was a Starbucks nearby, and the campus had a pond that whispered “legacy.” The admissions video featured boys of every background, each one talking about leadership while standing in front of brick architecture that probably cost more than our house. When they mentioned their “global perspective,” my husband teared up a little. He studied abroad once, in London.

St. Albans impressed us with its charm and Episcopalian restraint. “We’re 43% students of color,” the headmaster said, his smile both humble and rehearsed. We loved the number. It sounded like justice with manners.

At Landon, the admissions office described the school as “evolving.” We took that to mean “still figuring out how to talk about diversity without whispering it.” Our tour guide said they had “a lot more public school kids now,” which we took as a warning.

Then there was St. Anselm’s—small, earnest, and full of genuine tradition. Actual monks! Our son said it felt “too quiet.” We said that was the sound of discernment. He rolled his eyes. We took that as spiritual growth.

In the end, we chose a school that “values diversity” while “maintaining rigorous standards,” which is parental shorthand for some variety, same comfort level. We tell our friends it was the perfect balance of tradition and inclusion.

And every time the newsletter features our son in a group photo next to a boy named Alejandro, we proudly forward it to everyone: “Look at this! This is the future!”

We mean it, too. We just hope the future still has a good lacrosse program.

Love this! Please post often!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When we set out to find the right all-boys school for our son, we knew exactly what we wanted:

Strong academics.
Catholic values—or something like that.
A sense of brotherhood.
And, of course, diversity.

The kind of diversity that looks great on a website but still feels reassuring when you drop your kid off in the morning.

We first toured DeMatha, and it was…energetic. So much energy! So much music! So much art! So much personality! My husband whispered, “You can feel the brotherhood.” I whispered back, “You can feel the brotherhood.” We loved it, but ultimately felt our son might “get lost in the crowd,” which was code for “we didn’t see anyone else from country club.”

At Gonzaga, we were told the boys learn to serve others and challenge injustice. The admissions director proudly noted, “Our student body is one of the most diverse among Jesuit schools.” We nodded enthusiastically, pretending not to notice that “diverse” apparently meant “one student of color for every four rowing shells.”

Georgetown Prep felt comfortable. There was a Starbucks nearby, and the campus had a pond that whispered “legacy.” The admissions video featured boys of every background, each one talking about leadership while standing in front of brick architecture that probably cost more than our house. When they mentioned their “global perspective,” my husband teared up a little. He studied abroad once, in London.

St. Albans impressed us with its charm and Episcopalian restraint. “We’re 43% students of color,” the headmaster said, his smile both humble and rehearsed. We loved the number. It sounded like justice with manners.

At Landon, the admissions office described the school as “evolving.” We took that to mean “still figuring out how to talk about diversity without whispering it.” Our tour guide said they had “a lot more public school kids now,” which we took as a warning.

Then there was St. Anselm’s—small, earnest, and full of genuine tradition. Actual monks! Our son said it felt “too quiet.” We said that was the sound of discernment. He rolled his eyes. We took that as spiritual growth.

In the end, we chose a school that “values diversity” while “maintaining rigorous standards,” which is parental shorthand for some variety, same comfort level. We tell our friends it was the perfect balance of tradition and inclusion.

And every time the newsletter features our son in a group photo next to a boy named Alejandro, we proudly forward it to everyone: “Look at this! This is the future!”

We mean it, too. We just hope the future still has a good lacrosse program.

43% is a stretch

[Anonymous]

43% at STA?

My question would be, “Exactly what groups included under your definition of POC?”