When 1 parent practices and another doesn’t

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I love the fact that some posters tried to encourage you to bribe your kids to "choose" to go with you to church.

I'm with your husband. At least he hasn't told you to stop trying to indoctrinate your kids with bronze age fairy tales. You should give him more credit for trying to be respectful of your differences.

Catholicism is largely medieval fairy tales.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Please no Catholic bashing.

Both of us raised Catholic, though very lukewarmly, married in Church, baptized our kids, Catholic school. About 4 years ago I embraced my faith and returned to Church and Sacraments. My husband not so much. It is very hard because he will come to Mass if asked but won’t go to Confession, and still receives, and won’t make an effort to take kids without me. It’s hard because I feel my kids pick up on his attitude. Please, aside from prayers to St Monica , share how I can have grace for my husband but also raise my kids in the value that Sunday Mass is non negotiable. This is coming up because he took half our kids out to visit family and instead of finding a Mass (it’s CA, there are tons), they’re doing vacay stuff. I don’t mean to be a holy roller but it’s hard for me

I’m glad he got a weekend to see how happy life could be like without your domineering behavior.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Please no Catholic bashing.

Both of us raised Catholic, though very lukewarmly, married in Church, baptized our kids, Catholic school. About 4 years ago I embraced my faith and returned to Church and Sacraments. My husband not so much. It is very hard because he will come to Mass if asked but won’t go to Confession, and still receives, and won’t make an effort to take kids without me. It’s hard because I feel my kids pick up on his attitude. Please, aside from prayers to St Monica , share how I can have grace for my husband but also raise my kids in the value that Sunday Mass is non negotiable. This is coming up because he took half our kids out to visit family and instead of finding a Mass (it’s CA, there are tons), they’re doing vacay stuff. I don’t mean to be a holy roller but it’s hard for me

I’m glad he got a weekend to see how happy life could be like without your domineering behavior.

Right! He’s being himself! Just like OP is being herself

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Please no Catholic bashing.

Both of us raised Catholic, though very lukewarmly, married in Church, baptized our kids, Catholic school. About 4 years ago I embraced my faith and returned to Church and Sacraments. My husband not so much. It is very hard because he will come to Mass if asked but won’t go to Confession, and still receives, and won’t make an effort to take kids without me. It’s hard because I feel my kids pick up on his attitude. Please, aside from prayers to St Monica , share how I can have grace for my husband but also raise my kids in the value that Sunday Mass is non negotiable. This is coming up because he took half our kids out to visit family and instead of finding a Mass (it’s CA, there are tons), they’re doing vacay stuff. I don’t mean to be a holy roller but it’s hard for me

I’m glad he got a weekend to see how happy life could be like without your domineering behavior.

Right! He’s being himself! Just like OP is being herself

Ok these are making me laugh now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:WRT to “this is what we do”, I mean we go to Mass when we can, wherever we are and don’t give ourselves a bye week bc there’s hockey or vacation or we are just not feeling it. Just like the “this is what we do” families feel about teaching kids to brush their teeth, pick up trash, vote in every election or count to 3 when they’re mad. The anti Mass people will poke holes and say it’s Bronze Age fairy tales but the Catholic moms here posting seem to get it. But this has all been very humbling and helpful. Thanks all

I’m with you, OP.
I think the people saying that you should give your kids the choice probably wouldn’t feel the same way if your husband told them that they didn’t have to do their homework or take the SATs.

I don't understand that comparison to homework or SATs. Can you expand on that?

Sure. If OP’s husband didn’t feel that homework was important and didn’t make their kids do it if they didn’t want to or were busy doing other things, most people here would be telling her that her husband needs to get on board. Not that her kids should have a choice on whether or not they do homework.

Suppose the husband wasn't simply passive but actively took the position that the kids shouldn't be raised Catholic. What would you say then?

This isn't a situation where one decision is inherently better than another.

I would say the same thing as if the husband actively took the position that the kids shouldn’t worry about school and shouldn’t go to college. I understand that when kids are adults, they are going to make their own decisions, but as long as they are kids, I’m going to steer them in a certain direction.

You can say that one decision isn’t inherently better than the other, but I disagree.

In such a situation, why do you think your beliefs and wishes should trump the husband's?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:WRT to “this is what we do”, I mean we go to Mass when we can, wherever we are and don’t give ourselves a bye week bc there’s hockey or vacation or we are just not feeling it. Just like the “this is what we do” families feel about teaching kids to brush their teeth, pick up trash, vote in every election or count to 3 when they’re mad. The anti Mass people will poke holes and say it’s Bronze Age fairy tales but the Catholic moms here posting seem to get it. But this has all been very humbling and helpful. Thanks all

No it is no where near the same.

Those are life skills.

You are trying to indoctrinate your children into a cult that is currently suing to help abusers of children. And you want your kids to be more involved.
You are trying to control your DH and you changed the rules, why in the world should he need to go to Church? He is an adult for god's sake.

Not OP: There is nothing wrong with the teachings of Jesus Christ. There is nothing wrong with getting your children in the habit of being reflective and expressing gratitude or establishing a weekly habit of sitting in communion with others without devices!!!

And there's nothing wrong with deciding the Catholic church isn't for you or your children.

I mean, it’s kind of odd to decide that and then marry another Catholic, baptize your kids, and send them to Catholic school.

I think OP’s husband is just being lazy. He isn’t taking an ideological position.

The OP wasn't much of a practicing Catholic until 4 years ago. Lot of people have their kids baptized or choose catholic school more for social/cultural reasons than religious reasons. The OP seems to suggest that was the case here. It sounds like she changed course more than the husband.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:WRT to “this is what we do”, I mean we go to Mass when we can, wherever we are and don’t give ourselves a bye week bc there’s hockey or vacation or we are just not feeling it. Just like the “this is what we do” families feel about teaching kids to brush their teeth, pick up trash, vote in every election or count to 3 when they’re mad. The anti Mass people will poke holes and say it’s Bronze Age fairy tales but the Catholic moms here posting seem to get it. But this has all been very humbling and helpful. Thanks all

No it is no where near the same.

Those are life skills.

You are trying to indoctrinate your children into a cult that is currently suing to help abusers of children. And you want your kids to be more involved.
You are trying to control your DH and you changed the rules, why in the world should he need to go to Church? He is an adult for god's sake.

Not OP: There is nothing wrong with the teachings of Jesus Christ. There is nothing wrong with getting your children in the habit of being reflective and expressing gratitude or establishing a weekly habit of sitting in communion with others without devices!!!

That doesn’t have to be in a church, especially one with long track record of organized criminal activity against child victims. There is in fact something wrong with that. Why teach your child that raping children is OK?

/
Yes, it does. Nothing has replaced organized faith in our society.

And I’m not teaching my child that raping children is okay. That is as absurd as the RWNJ calling pro-choice advocates baby murderers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:WRT to “this is what we do”, I mean we go to Mass when we can, wherever we are and don’t give ourselves a bye week bc there’s hockey or vacation or we are just not feeling it. Just like the “this is what we do” families feel about teaching kids to brush their teeth, pick up trash, vote in every election or count to 3 when they’re mad. The anti Mass people will poke holes and say it’s Bronze Age fairy tales but the Catholic moms here posting seem to get it. But this has all been very humbling and helpful. Thanks all

No it is no where near the same.

Those are life skills.

You are trying to indoctrinate your children into a cult that is currently suing to help abusers of children. And you want your kids to be more involved.
You are trying to control your DH and you changed the rules, why in the world should he need to go to Church? He is an adult for god's sake.

Not OP: There is nothing wrong with the teachings of Jesus Christ. There is nothing wrong with getting your children in the habit of being reflective and expressing gratitude or establishing a weekly habit of sitting in communion with others without devices!!!

That doesn’t have to be in a church, especially one with long track record of organized criminal activity against child victims. There is in fact something wrong with that. Why teach your child that raping children is OK?

/
Yes, it does. Nothing has replaced organized faith in our society.

And I’m not teaching my child that raping children is okay. That is as absurd as the RWNJ calling pro-choice advocates baby murderers.

If you starved a lion for 6 months and then put a lamb in front of it, what do you think would happen? This is exactly what the Catholic priest system is.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:WRT to “this is what we do”, I mean we go to Mass when we can, wherever we are and don’t give ourselves a bye week bc there’s hockey or vacation or we are just not feeling it. Just like the “this is what we do” families feel about teaching kids to brush their teeth, pick up trash, vote in every election or count to 3 when they’re mad. The anti Mass people will poke holes and say it’s Bronze Age fairy tales but the Catholic moms here posting seem to get it. But this has all been very humbling and helpful. Thanks all

No it is no where near the same.

Those are life skills.

You are trying to indoctrinate your children into a cult that is currently suing to help abusers of children. And you want your kids to be more involved.
You are trying to control your DH and you changed the rules, why in the world should he need to go to Church? He is an adult for god's sake.

Not OP: There is nothing wrong with the teachings of Jesus Christ. There is nothing wrong with getting your children in the habit of being reflective and expressing gratitude or establishing a weekly habit of sitting in communion with others without devices!!!

That doesn’t have to be in a church, especially one with long track record of organized criminal activity against child victims. There is in fact something wrong with that. Why teach your child that raping children is OK?

/
Yes, it does. Nothing has replaced organized faith in our society.

And I’m not teaching my child that raping children is okay. That is as absurd as the RWNJ calling pro-choice advocates baby murderers.

Education is much, much more beneficial to a functioning society than religion ever was. Certainly more than playing cannibalism.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:WRT to “this is what we do”, I mean we go to Mass when we can, wherever we are and don’t give ourselves a bye week bc there’s hockey or vacation or we are just not feeling it. Just like the “this is what we do” families feel about teaching kids to brush their teeth, pick up trash, vote in every election or count to 3 when they’re mad. The anti Mass people will poke holes and say it’s Bronze Age fairy tales but the Catholic moms here posting seem to get it. But this has all been very humbling and helpful. Thanks all

No it is no where near the same.

Those are life skills.

You are trying to indoctrinate your children into a cult that is currently suing to help abusers of children. And you want your kids to be more involved.
You are trying to control your DH and you changed the rules, why in the world should he need to go to Church? He is an adult for god's sake.

Not OP: There is nothing wrong with the teachings of Jesus Christ. There is nothing wrong with getting your children in the habit of being reflective and expressing gratitude or establishing a weekly habit of sitting in communion with others without devices!!!

That doesn’t have to be in a church, especially one with long track record of organized criminal activity against child victims. There is in fact something wrong with that. Why teach your child that raping children is OK?

/
Yes, it does. Nothing has replaced organized faith in our society.

And I’m not teaching my child that raping children is okay. That is as absurd as the RWNJ calling pro-choice advocates baby murderers.

Education is much, much more beneficial to a functioning society than religion ever was. Certainly more than playing cannibalism.

Except you've forgotten that throughout history religious institutions have been the primary educators of many children.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:WRT to “this is what we do”, I mean we go to Mass when we can, wherever we are and don’t give ourselves a bye week bc there’s hockey or vacation or we are just not feeling it. Just like the “this is what we do” families feel about teaching kids to brush their teeth, pick up trash, vote in every election or count to 3 when they’re mad. The anti Mass people will poke holes and say it’s Bronze Age fairy tales but the Catholic moms here posting seem to get it. But this has all been very humbling and helpful. Thanks all

No it is no where near the same.

Those are life skills.

You are trying to indoctrinate your children into a cult that is currently suing to help abusers of children. And you want your kids to be more involved.
You are trying to control your DH and you changed the rules, why in the world should he need to go to Church? He is an adult for god's sake.

Not OP: There is nothing wrong with the teachings of Jesus Christ. There is nothing wrong with getting your children in the habit of being reflective and expressing gratitude or establishing a weekly habit of sitting in communion with others without devices!!!

That doesn’t have to be in a church, especially one with long track record of organized criminal activity against child victims. There is in fact something wrong with that. Why teach your child that raping children is OK?

/
Yes, it does. Nothing has replaced organized faith in our society.

And I’m not teaching my child that raping children is okay. That is as absurd as the RWNJ calling pro-choice advocates baby murderers.

Education is much, much more beneficial to a functioning society than religion ever was. Certainly more than playing cannibalism.

Except you've forgotten that throughout history religious institutions have been the primary educators of many children.

Of course, get 'em young and train them :roll:

[Anonymous]

You pulled the bait and switch. He thought you were cafeteria, and you turned evangelical. This is a you problem. Talk to god and find peace in not having indoctrinated children.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:WRT to “this is what we do”, I mean we go to Mass when we can, wherever we are and don’t give ourselves a bye week bc there’s hockey or vacation or we are just not feeling it. Just like the “this is what we do” families feel about teaching kids to brush their teeth, pick up trash, vote in every election or count to 3 when they’re mad. The anti Mass people will poke holes and say it’s Bronze Age fairy tales but the Catholic moms here posting seem to get it. But this has all been very humbling and helpful. Thanks all

No it is no where near the same.

Those are life skills.

You are trying to indoctrinate your children into a cult that is currently suing to help abusers of children. And you want your kids to be more involved.
You are trying to control your DH and you changed the rules, why in the world should he need to go to Church? He is an adult for god's sake.

Not OP: There is nothing wrong with the teachings of Jesus Christ. There is nothing wrong with getting your children in the habit of being reflective and expressing gratitude or establishing a weekly habit of sitting in communion with others without devices!!!

That doesn’t have to be in a church, especially one with long track record of organized criminal activity against child victims. There is in fact something wrong with that. Why teach your child that raping children is OK?

/
Yes, it does. Nothing has replaced organized faith in our society.

And I’m not teaching my child that raping children is okay. That is as absurd as the RWNJ calling pro-choice advocates baby murderers.

Education is much, much more beneficial to a functioning society than religion ever was. Certainly more than playing cannibalism.

Except you've forgotten that throughout history religious institutions have been the primary educators of many children.

How did that work out for indigenous children?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:WRT to “this is what we do”, I mean we go to Mass when we can, wherever we are and don’t give ourselves a bye week bc there’s hockey or vacation or we are just not feeling it. Just like the “this is what we do” families feel about teaching kids to brush their teeth, pick up trash, vote in every election or count to 3 when they’re mad. The anti Mass people will poke holes and say it’s Bronze Age fairy tales but the Catholic moms here posting seem to get it. But this has all been very humbling and helpful. Thanks all

No it is no where near the same.

Those are life skills.

You are trying to indoctrinate your children into a cult that is currently suing to help abusers of children. And you want your kids to be more involved.
You are trying to control your DH and you changed the rules, why in the world should he need to go to Church? He is an adult for god's sake.

Not OP: There is nothing wrong with the teachings of Jesus Christ. There is nothing wrong with getting your children in the habit of being reflective and expressing gratitude or establishing a weekly habit of sitting in communion with others without devices!!!

That doesn’t have to be in a church, especially one with long track record of organized criminal activity against child victims. There is in fact something wrong with that. Why teach your child that raping children is OK?

/
Yes, it does. Nothing has replaced organized faith in our society.

And I’m not teaching my child that raping children is okay. That is as absurd as the RWNJ calling pro-choice advocates baby murderers.

Education is much, much more beneficial to a functioning society than religion ever was. Certainly more than playing cannibalism.

Except you've forgotten that throughout history religious institutions have been the primary educators of many children.

And notice how the speed of progress increased dramatically as civilizations moved away from that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:WRT to “this is what we do”, I mean we go to Mass when we can, wherever we are and don’t give ourselves a bye week bc there’s hockey or vacation or we are just not feeling it. Just like the “this is what we do” families feel about teaching kids to brush their teeth, pick up trash, vote in every election or count to 3 when they’re mad. The anti Mass people will poke holes and say it’s Bronze Age fairy tales but the Catholic moms here posting seem to get it. But this has all been very humbling and helpful. Thanks all

No it is no where near the same.

Those are life skills.

You are trying to indoctrinate your children into a cult that is currently suing to help abusers of children. And you want your kids to be more involved.
You are trying to control your DH and you changed the rules, why in the world should he need to go to Church? He is an adult for god's sake.

Not OP: There is nothing wrong with the teachings of Jesus Christ. There is nothing wrong with getting your children in the habit of being reflective and expressing gratitude or establishing a weekly habit of sitting in communion with others without devices!!!

That doesn’t have to be in a church, especially one with long track record of organized criminal activity against child victims. There is in fact something wrong with that. Why teach your child that raping children is OK?

/
Yes, it does. Nothing has replaced organized faith in our society.

And I’m not teaching my child that raping children is okay. That is as absurd as the RWNJ calling pro-choice advocates baby murderers.

Education is much, much more beneficial to a functioning society than religion ever was. Certainly more than playing cannibalism.

Except you've forgotten that throughout history religious institutions have been the primary educators of many children.

And notice how the speed of progress increased dramatically as civilizations moved away from that.

Correct!