DC didn’t do SAT prep

[Anonymous]

What schools is your DC thinking about?

[Anonymous]

Where do you live, OP?

We focused on test optional schools. My oldest kid had undiagnosed ADHD and did not have any accommodations, so the score was around the same as your son's score.

Kid took a Princeton Review class and score did not increase. Princeton Review refunded our $1400 because kid attended every session and did every homework assignment, and the score did not increase by their promised amount. ADHD for the win! LOL

They ended up at a school they LOVE. They are so happy. So, this can still end well.

I'm sorry that it's stressful now. Your ex sounds like a bloviator, and I hope all works out. And, if son doesn't get into the school he wanted (or that daddy wanted), then he will learn quite the lesson. He might learn the lesson that daddy is a cheap mfer.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:With the ex saying things like only the top schools are worth attending and if you don’t get in it isn’t worth going to college at all, but also dismissing and discounting the value of SAT prep, is there a possibility that he’s trying to sabotage the whole thing so he doesn’t have to pay for college? Does he want your son to go into the trades or military or something totally different?

This is what I think and why I mentioned that the son might learn the lesson that daddy is cheap. Cheap, cheap, cheap.

[Anonymous]

If a kid is motivated, there are amazing free and low-cost resources out there for SAT prep (starting with Khan Academy but going way beyond it). Just check out the SAT subreddit, for example. A kid who is smart enough to score in the 1300s without prep can also learn how to improve. Yes, a private tutor can be helpful for less motivated kids, but if you can convince your son to take the test seriously, it is absolutely not necessary. I'm honestly not convinced that one-size-fits-all classes help much at all.

There are also many colleges where your son would likely be fine either submitting a 1400 or going TO.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:1. Your son’s SAT score is better than fine.

2. If you can’t even afford to spring for an SAT prep course then you ain’t paying for your kid to go to a private college.

3. Your kid ain’t getting into UVA, W&M and probably Tech regardless.

4. So JMU it is. And it’s a great school.

5. Stop blaming your ex for your kid’s laziness.

DP.

#5 No, another parent actively discrediting the value of something (i.e. test prep class) or valuing it, can have an impact on how it is received by a DC who tends toward being lazy or is not a self-starter.

Maybe you can pitch it to the X that higher SAT score is likely to lead to more scholarship opportunities for the student (less $ for X to pay) as well as opening up DCs options. Also, it does sound like you, X, and DC should talk to guidance counselor and see the data 9Naviance, etc.) to get a realistic understanding of what is possible with your DCs current grades and SATs.

The score is secondary until there is a common understanding of schools that are realistic for OP's son among all involved. It is going to be a more combative mess otherwise. Hopefully, the counselor can inject a dose of reality that will help everyone to varying degrees and also motivate the son to do what is necessary for a school that he wants. The SAT may be distracting from issues of fit as well. Not hearing much about that here. What does he want from a school?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:With the ex saying things like only the top schools are worth attending and if you don’t get in it isn’t worth going to college at all, but also dismissing and discounting the value of SAT prep, is there a possibility that he’s trying to sabotage the whole thing so he doesn’t have to pay for college? Does he want your son to go into the trades or military or something totally different?

This is what I think and why I mentioned that the son might learn the lesson that daddy is cheap. Cheap, cheap, cheap.

We don’t know the entire situation. He may be paying a lot in child support and cannot afford it. Mom is also cheap as she has a good income and refuses to pay as well. There is no reason why she can’t do it if it’s important to her. Kid has a good score.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:1. Your son’s SAT score is better than fine.

2. If you can’t even afford to spring for an SAT prep course then you ain’t paying for your kid to go to a private college.

3. Your kid ain’t getting into UVA, W&M and probably Tech regardless.

4. So JMU it is. And it’s a great school.

5. Stop blaming your ex for your kid’s laziness.

1. See PP’s post about TO and how it has led to SAT inflation and intimidation due to kids with lesser scores not submitting.

2. OP can afford it but does not want to set a precedent with ex H.

Where are you getting this from?? She said:

“without his dad on board I couldn’t swing it on my own financially.”

OP here. I could have phrased it better. Technically yes I can pay 1 or 2 k for prep but there are factors for not wanting to do it on my own. Happy?

I'm not the PP, but if you make 120K a year you can afford this on your own. Is it fair, because your exH should be chipping in? No. But I presume that's why he's your ex. So you can either prioritize your kid's SAT prep (and there's no guarantee he'll get a 1500+ even with the prep), or just let it go.

+1. Agree with this, but FYI, there are cheaper alternatives to SAT prep online. Has your kid tried the Khan Academy free SAT prep?

Khan doesn’t offer what it used to, not since the digital SAT came in. I wish people would stop assuming it’s that easy.

Questions are still similar.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:With the ex saying things like only the top schools are worth attending and if you don’t get in it isn’t worth going to college at all, but also dismissing and discounting the value of SAT prep, is there a possibility that he’s trying to sabotage the whole thing so he doesn’t have to pay for college? Does he want your son to go into the trades or military or something totally different?

This is what I think and why I mentioned that the son might learn the lesson that daddy is cheap. Cheap, cheap, cheap.

Maybe daddy is sending a lot of child support to mommy but she just doesn’t want to spend the money on SAT prep.

[Anonymous]

1320 takes UVA off the table. Lots more options if you can push it over 1500.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:1. Your son’s SAT score is better than fine.

2. If you can’t even afford to spring for an SAT prep course then you ain’t paying for your kid to go to a private college.

3. Your kid ain’t getting into UVA, W&M and probably Tech regardless.

4. So JMU it is. And it’s a great school.

5. Stop blaming your ex for your kid’s laziness.

1. See PP’s post about TO and how it has led to SAT inflation and intimidation due to kids with lesser scores not submitting.

2. OP can afford it but does not want to set a precedent with ex H.

Where are you getting this from?? She said:

“without his dad on board I couldn’t swing it on my own financially.”

OP here. I could have phrased it better. Technically yes I can pay 1 or 2 k for prep but there are factors for not wanting to do it on my own. Happy?

I'm not the PP, but if you make 120K a year you can afford this on your own. Is it fair, because your exH should be chipping in? No. But I presume that's why he's your ex. So you can either prioritize your kid's SAT prep (and there's no guarantee he'll get a 1500+ even with the prep), or just let it go.

+1. Agree with this, but FYI, there are cheaper alternatives to SAT prep online. Has your kid tried the Khan Academy free SAT prep?

Khan doesn’t offer what it used to, not since the digital SAT came in. I wish people would stop assuming it’s that easy.

Questions are still similar.

+1. I know a lot of kids who use khan test prep. It’s certainly better than “goofing around and taking the test” which is what OP’s kid did

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If a kid is motivated, there are amazing free and low-cost resources out there for SAT prep (starting with Khan Academy but going way beyond it). Just check out the SAT subreddit, for example. A kid who is smart enough to score in the 1300s without prep can also learn how to improve. Yes, a private tutor can be helpful for less motivated kids, but if you can convince your son to take the test seriously, it is absolutely not necessary. I'm honestly not convinced that one-size-fits-all classes help much at all.

There are also many colleges where your son would likely be fine either submitting a 1400 or going TO.

The issue seems to be that the kid is not particularly motivated.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If a kid is motivated, there are amazing free and low-cost resources out there for SAT prep (starting with Khan Academy but going way beyond it). Just check out the SAT subreddit, for example. A kid who is smart enough to score in the 1300s without prep can also learn how to improve. Yes, a private tutor can be helpful for less motivated kids, but if you can convince your son to take the test seriously, it is absolutely not necessary. I'm honestly not convinced that one-size-fits-all classes help much at all.

There are also many colleges where your son would likely be fine either submitting a 1400 or going TO.

The issue seems to be that the kid is not particularly motivated.

Then OP should stop stressing because the kid will go to state school, maybe at best Tulane or SMU level and those schools take everyone ED

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Where do you live, OP?

We focused on test optional schools. My oldest kid had undiagnosed ADHD and did not have any accommodations, so the score was around the same as your son's score.

Kid took a Princeton Review class and score did not increase. Princeton Review refunded our $1400 because kid attended every session and did every homework assignment, and the score did not increase by their promised amount. ADHD for the win! LOL

They ended up at a school they LOVE. They are so happy. So, this can still end well.

I'm sorry that it's stressful now. Your ex sounds like a bloviator, and I hope all works out. And, if son doesn't get into the school he wanted (or that daddy wanted), then he will learn quite the lesson. He might learn the lesson that daddy is a cheap mfer.

Please list everything you know from what you've been told that makes dad sound like a bloviator.

Also, mom agrees with dad that kid could self study. Kid didn't. Why does dad sound cheap for not wanting to pay for something that kid's history shows he likely won't be motivated to do much? The truth of the matter is that it is not that important to dad, kid or mom (who now admits she can afford to pay $1-$2k in SAT prep) for any one of them to step up and pay for it.

[Anonymous]

Some kids need more structure and accountability to get things done. It’s not a failing for an in-person prep class to be what a kid needs in order to study effectively.

Mom has to decide if she wants to stand on principle with Dad more than she wants kid to have the prep class.

Dad’s attitude that only the most prestigious schools are worth attending and if you don’t get in there - entirely on your own steam, no prep classes allowed, apparently - then you might as well not go to college at all makes him sound like a jerk and not a helpful influence on the kid.

[Anonymous]

#1 Priority: Learn to make the most of the Desmos calculator for math!! This alone will save him time and boost his score.

There are tons of free (and short) videos out there with the necessary tips and shortcuts.

Here's one example: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-pGNBb8M3LQ