Why do people marry unattractive people?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Assume great wealth is not involved. I just don’t get it.

Same way people marry mean, stupid and annoying people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Assume great wealth is not involved. I just don’t get it.

They don't want high maintenance people who are more likely to cheat as well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There’s probably a lot you don’t get.

+1

I have dated people who are from, is roughly say, a 4 to a 10 in physical attractiveness. The best I've ever looked was probably a 7. I'm probably a 3 now.

I have an awesome personality, I'm smart, I've done impressive things with my life, and I'm good company. I'm an interesting date and a good partner.

Never had a problem getting dates before I married. No longer interested in dating now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There’s probably a lot you don’t get.

Explain more, unless it's just a drive-by insult

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What? How is this a question?

First off, some people are "unattractive" themselves. I am guessing you are not confused by ugly people marrying ugly people? And that you are confused by people who are 8/9 on the looks scale marrying people who are 5/6/7? I mean ... looks are only part of who someone is. And there are other things that are at least as important if not more so when choosing a life partner. How do you get to be an adult and not understand that?

Assortive mating is definitely a thing. I'm not denying that. But multiple traits -- not just physical attractiveness (or "great wealth" as you put it) -- are involved.

OP here. How can a person maintain a marriage to someone who is not physically attractive? I married a funny really good looking guy. Now granted he's a worker bee not a management type, doesn't do a lot with the kids or around the house without me asking him, etc., but we've been married over 15 years. I couldn't put up with the laziness and ordinariness of his ambitions unless he were good looking. KWIM?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Assume great wealth is not involved. I just don’t get it.

Are you still single or were you dumped?

I see why ……

Neither. Married over 15 years.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sometimes there is just something about someone that attracts a mate.
Humor, quirks, goals, compatibility, etc.

Even people considered "ugly" can be quite "attractive", such as Vin Diesel for example. Not that good looking at all, sloping forehead, big nose, droopy face, but he has something about him that makes him hot.

Yeah, he’s insanely fit (and rich.)

Ok there's another thing - why would you marry a guy who's got a fit body buthisface/butherface? Face is much more important than body.

[Anonymous]

Pollinators need to survive and choose flowers that look insignificant to others.

[Anonymous]

What a troll

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Pollinators need to survive and choose flowers that look insignificant to others.

This. I'm uggo but have a great waist to hip ratio.

[Anonymous]

I didn’t date a ton, but my DH is the least physically attractive of the men I dated - though the first person I dated (teenager at the time) was already very fit and went on to be a professional athlete so it’s probably unfair to compare others to him. My DH and I started dating in college - I didn’t think I’d marry him, but I liked his intelligence, quick / funny wit, and his excellent ability to listen and offer sound advice. He often is able to help calm me when stressed. He is quick with a hug or shoulder rub or compliment which isn’t something I saw much with my own parents and really appreciate. He also is very open to feedback / trying things in the bedroom. I didn’t know this when we got together, but it turns out he’s a very loving and involved father. I do wish he kept himself in better shape and also wish he took on a larger share of housework without being asked (we both work out of the house full time), but overall although it could be fun to be with someone I find hot, I don’t regret my choice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What? How is this a question?

First off, some people are "unattractive" themselves. I am guessing you are not confused by ugly people marrying ugly people? And that you are confused by people who are 8/9 on the looks scale marrying people who are 5/6/7? I mean ... looks are only part of who someone is. And there are other things that are at least as important if not more so when choosing a life partner. How do you get to be an adult and not understand that?

Assortive mating is definitely a thing. I'm not denying that. But multiple traits -- not just physical attractiveness (or "great wealth" as you put it) -- are involved.

OP here. How can a person maintain a marriage to someone who is not physically attractive? I married a funny really good looking guy. Now granted he's a worker bee not a management type, doesn't do a lot with the kids or around the house without me asking him, etc., but we've been married over 15 years. I couldn't put up with the laziness and ordinariness of his ambitions unless he were good looking. KWIM?

So you married a dud bc you thought he was good looking? That’s sad OP. I’m sorry for what your future probably holds.

[Anonymous]

You just need to study pollinators and botany to get your question answered.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm no prize pig myself

I’m ribbonless at the county fair.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Assume great wealth is not involved. I just don’t get it.

Someone married you. Ask them.