I bet later on in life this child will remember the ONE grownup out of many who actually spoke up about how inappropriate this Mother’s comment was and be grateful that someone had the balls to advocate for her. Groupthink can be a very negative thing. Sometimes it just takes one person to stand up for another person - just one. And that one person has the ability to make a world of difference. |
| MYOB |
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Mom was being judged bcs her child was misbehaving. Then she was judged bcs she said something. And OP, presumably another mom, decided to pile it on.
Not cool. |
| OP, YTA. |
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Normally, I respond to these posts as out of line.
I don’t think you were in this case. I understand why she said it in the moment, and you offered her a perspective the moment didn’t provide her otherwise. She might reflect on this moment and bite her tongue next time. |
| Omg, the poor woman probably felt embarrassed and awkward and was trying to make a comment to diffuse the situation. You made it worse. |
Yes, this has been covered. OP expressed her regret. It's ok to stop piling on, now. |
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Inappropriate/WAAAAAY out of line. What was your goal?
Someone was having a rotten day. Instead of being kind and telling her 'don't worry, we have all been there' or 'hard to believe it, but you do miss even the bad days with kids' you chose to make her day worse. At a port of call on a Mexican cruise a couple months ago, a frustrated mother was trying to get her two overtired cranky toddlers back through the open market shopping area to the cruise security line before the sailing. Every human in the vicinity, all our teen/tween kids overhead the mother yell "you are the biggest dick in all of Mexico!!!!" to one toddler. I know she really was just feeling embarrassed and feeling a need to tell the adults around 'hey, I know this kid is being a brat- sorry'. It was 5% funny (like if it was a movie, not real life) But it was just SO MEAN. My kids have been quoting her for weeks w sad faces... they felt so badly for the kids. I wanted them to know it's normal and ok to feel overwhelmed w kids but to choose a better option. Anyway I asked if she was on xxxx cruise line and she was on the same one as us. I told her we were going in the same direction. Could my kids take some of her bags and I'd carry the toddler. She was like 'YUP'. The toddler was so so shocked but entertained by my kids that he shut up and off we went. If she'd told me to go F myself I'd have kept walking but sometimes people just need to not feel judged and to get a little help. |
Good heavens. I remember when my kid was a kid in the 1990s parents would quote the Bill Cosby line (from his standup comedy quoting his mom) "I brought you into this world, I can take you out of it." I thought it was a horrifying thing to say, and these were trashy people in general (it was a working class neighborhood, I was floored when I moved into this cheap duplex and a neighbor's kids came to introduce themselves and immediately opened my freezer to see what was in there--I was poor and had grown up working class but never would have dreamed that to be ok) but wouldn't have called CPS. I did call CPS about the kid who would show up at midnight asking if my kid could come out and play and once told us about a fire he'd built in his basement and turned out to wear a knife strapped to his leg. Kid was 10. His mom also stole my rose bush while I was moving to the house we bought. As for shopping with kids, plenty of people have no choice so shut up about that. I would have just apologized to the woman for staring if I said anything at all. |