Is it responsible to spend 90K/yr in education?

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:It is incredible how expensive college is in this country. Even if you are a multi millionaire and money is not an issue, we should not normalize $100k/year for a college education.


+1
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I think it’s silly, no matter how much money you have.
If kid is brilliant, they will get merit scholarship.
If they are not, then college not for them.
Just my opinion.


A lot of schools don’t offer merit.

Our kids made grades high enough to get in, but since everyone that attends has similarly high stats there is no merit. But we can afford it. And are comfortable paying it - for both kids.

But that’s why we work, When We could likely retire. Work is easy. Money is good. Of course, We can save the money and leave an extra $500k (in todays money) to our grandkids when we die; but we decided to spend it on their parents’ education (and still leave them millions). This is Our choice and what works for us.

So Just because it’s silly for your bank account, it’s just another bill for ours.

Just my opinion!


You are an example of many people who are loaded enough to effortlessly afford it, there are people way more loaded than you are who don't even have to work to give their kids the most expensive private education. But it's irrelevant to the OP, because she wouldn't be asking this question had money not being an issue.
Anonymous
Private college is a luxury, simple as that. Prices rise because there are many people with money and competition is high and schools can charge it. I's a luxury product.

You already know the answer that going to a good state school is likely to give you the same result given all other variables (major, proactive job search and networking, etc) are the same. The only one factor that distinguishes $$$$ private schools from the state schools is larger pool or rich peers. If your kid is planning to capitalize on access to well-connected elites then it may be worth it, but there is zero guarantee this happens, it's a probability that's still rather small if you don't come from these circles already. If your kid is doing some special research or connected already with some professor/lab at one of these schools and it's their passion it also may be worth it, but still a luxury, and usually in that case you should expect some sort of FA or a scholarship.

Anonymous
Let me help you in a different way.

The most important question to ask yourself for decision making is how you survive a less favorable outcome in both cases. How bitter and broke will you feel if your kid goes to a $$$$ school and can't support himself vs. if he pays a discounted rate for a state school and ends up unemployed. It's the loss dilemma. Like a risk calculation. Can you afford this risk like a family with tens of mil NW that would just wave it off financially even if disappointed? If your kid doesn't make it, then having extra savings become even more instrumental in helping him get up on his feet or go to a grad school.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My oldest DS was accepted to both Northwestern University (90K/yr), and University of Virginia (40K/year) in 2020, and he decided to attend Northwestern University. The total cost of attendance is around 360K. His cousin attended UVA in 2020 (he was also accepted by Northwestern), and both he and DS received the same job at the same company. They both studied the same major, but his cousin has 200K in savings for not going to Northwestern. He will take my DS a long time to save up to 200K in post-tax money.

My younger DS is a HS senior, and I explained to him that if he should go to UVA, if accepted, because it would set him up much better financially for the future. I will invest that 200K towards his retirement. Not sure if I am doing the right thing here. Thoughts?


Unless your son was so academically advanced that the UVA Honors program would be a letdown, he was stupid. But it's hard to blame a kid for not understanding lifetime finances. That's on you. You basically played the role of a predatory loan officer, but you weren't even paid for it. You played your self and your family.



there is no such thing
Anonymous
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Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:UVA is one of the best state schools in the country so it’s an easy answer.


Unless your kid is better off a small college. Then a huge state school is a waste of money.


UVA isn't a huge state school like most of the other flagships. It has only 17,000 students. Also VA offers W&M which is an unusual
SLAC-sized public
Anonymous
OP - my DD was in a similar situation. She chose UVA over the expensive private. We were (secretly) pleased because FAFSA/CSS said we weren't entitled to financial aid and she received no merit offers (she applied to Ivies and the top SLACs which don't offer merit). So we were full freight everywhere she was accepted. So she went to UVA and we banked the difference and let it compound. She distinguished herself at UVA and is now finishing her DPhil at Oxbridge and is applying to law schools now - where, again, she will receive no financial aid and most likely no merit - but we can afford the ridiculous law fees because that UVA savings has grown to cover the $116k a year that the T3s want. Even UVA, a public law school, is $106k a year. I do shake my head at these fees but it us what it is. Anyhow, UVA worked out very well for DD and this family. Best of luck. Oh and, if possible. have your daughter get nominated by her high school for the Jefferson Scholarship ... but it may already be too late for that.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:My oldest DS was accepted to both Northwestern University (90K/yr), and University of Virginia (40K/year) in 2020, and he decided to attend Northwestern University. The total cost of attendance is around 360K. His cousin attended UVA in 2020 (he was also accepted by Northwestern), and both he and DS received the same job at the same company. They both studied the same major, but his cousin has 200K in savings for not going to Northwestern. He will take my DS a long time to save up to 200K in post-tax money.

My younger DS is a HS senior, and I explained to him that if he should go to UVA, if accepted, because it would set him up much better financially for the future. I will invest that 200K towards his retirement. Not sure if I am doing the right thing here. Thoughts?



OP- my oldest was also a 2020 HS graduate and he was also accepted to northwestern and UMD honors with merit. We are fortunate and have savings and a good income and could have covered the costs at either school. We showed him the numbers on a spread sheet (one year at northwestern would equal 4 years at UMD) and offered him a new car if he went to UMD. He went to UMD started working at Big 4 consulting in October. I think his outcome was the same for 1/4 of the cost + $26k for a car.

The further I am removed from college admissions, I think in most cases state schools can provide the same outcome for jobs at a fraction of the cost.
Anonymous
I went to Cornell in the late 80s and my dad cringed at the 10K tuition. There is enough money in our daughter's 529 to cover whatever school she wants to attend. A couple of the schools (WashU and NW) would basically wipeout her 529. We have recommended she consider all the factors in selecting a school, including the benefit of going to schools with significant merit aid.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Let me help you in a different way.

The most important question to ask yourself for decision making is how you survive a less favorable outcome in both cases. How bitter and broke will you feel if your kid goes to a $$$$ school and can't support himself vs. if he pays a discounted rate for a state school and ends up unemployed. It's the loss dilemma. Like a risk calculation. Can you afford this risk like a family with tens of mil NW that would just wave it off financially even if disappointed? If your kid doesn't make it, then having extra savings become even more instrumental in helping him get up on his feet or go to a grad school.


Why does state school mean unemployed as an outcome?
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:OP - my DD was in a similar situation. She chose UVA over the expensive private. We were (secretly) pleased because FAFSA/CSS said we weren't entitled to financial aid and she received no merit offers (she applied to Ivies and the top SLACs which don't offer merit). So we were full freight everywhere she was accepted. So she went to UVA and we banked the difference and let it compound. She distinguished herself at UVA and is now finishing her DPhil at Oxbridge and is applying to law schools now - where, again, she will receive no financial aid and most likely no merit - but we can afford the ridiculous law fees because that UVA savings has grown to cover the $116k a year that the T3s want. Even UVA, a public law school, is $106k a year. I do shake my head at these fees but it us what it is. Anyhow, UVA worked out very well for DD and this family. Best of luck. Oh and, if possible. have your daughter get nominated by her high school for the Jefferson Scholarship ... but it may already be too late for that.


You are aware of how insufferable you sound, right?
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:To spend that much money on college, I would require that (1) I reached financial independence/no longer needed to work and (2) spending that much would in no way whatsoever change the probability of my money running out before age 95.


Good plan. But it can be done before that. As long as you have targeted/saved for college (in 529 or otherwise), are also saving well for retirement (so that you can fund living to 95 and afford 4-5 years in advanced care), I think you can still be working. I would also want to be on track to have a paid off home by 55, if not sooner.

IMO the key is targeted savings for college and being well set otherwise.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I think it’s silly, no matter how much money you have.
If kid is brilliant, they will get merit scholarship.
If they are not, then college not for them.
Just my opinion.


A lot of schools don’t offer merit.

Our kids made grades high enough to get in, but since everyone that attends has similarly high stats there is no merit. But we can afford it. And are comfortable paying it - for both kids.

But that’s why we work, When We could likely retire. Work is easy. Money is good. Of course, We can save the money and leave an extra $500k (in todays money) to our grandkids when we die; but we decided to spend it on their parents’ education (and still leave them millions). This is Our choice and what works for us.

So Just because it’s silly for your bank account, it’s just another bill for ours.

Just my opinion!


You are an example of many people who are loaded enough to effortlessly afford it, there are people way more loaded than you are who don't even have to work to give their kids the most expensive private education. But it's irrelevant to the OP, because she wouldn't be asking this question had money not being an issue.


Or just someone who also targeted saving for college from time kids were little. I know plenty of people who only make $250-300K who manage to save for 90K college (and are not going into debt)---they simply chose to save and make education a priority. Think about it. If you were living on $125-150K at one time, then incomes went up to $250K, you can choose to save at least 50% of that for college and bingo you will be set. I do get that the other 50% likely went to retirement savings and other items. But fact is, many people choose not to save--and that's okay, but don't claim you couldn't have saved if you wanted to
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:[url]
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:UVA is one of the best state schools in the country so it’s an easy answer.


Unless your kid is better off a small college. Then a huge state school is a waste of money.


UVA isn't a huge state school like most of the other flagships. It has only 17,000 students. Also VA offers W&M which is an unusual
SLAC-sized public


That's still a large school. My kids targeted schools with 5-8K undergrads. They both knew they would do better at a school that size. Their HS was 2600, so they also knew they wanted more than 1-2K students (and one wanted engineering so that size was out anyhow for the major).
Sure my kid could attend a large school and "survive" but they will thrive more easily at a 5-8K school.
And if your kid is "qualified" for a T25, they can easily go to the 30-75 range and get good merit. my top kid did that at several schools--including one around 50 that gave $42K/year merit. So yearly cost would be $45K---not that much more than the 27-28K for state schools.
Anonymous
I don’t understand folks who say “money isn’t an issue for us” when it comes to paying for private college. Are they saying that money isn’t an issue for them for ANYTHING, anything relating to their kids, or anything relating to their kids’ education? If it’s the first, that’s great, good for you, but there are very, very few of you out there. If it’s the second, well, congratulations on spoiling your children. But if it’s the third, why shouldn’t cost matter to when it comes to college? Why pay more - sometimes much more - for this one particular item in the absence of any evidence of any tangle difference in outcome?

Posters will respond that it's all about "fit," and that their kids deserve to go anywhere they want to college, but why is that the case? Why is it so difficult for parents to understand that it's not a marriage - it's college - and fitting into a glass slipper is not a requirement? this way of thinking is coddling to the extreme.
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