Is it responsible to spend 90K/yr in education?

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I had this conversation with my SIL and nephew over thanksgiving. They have more money than us and easily are spending 90k a year for the kids in undergrad. I explained that we cannot go this route. We will fully pay for a solid in state public school because that’s what we can do. We will strongly advise them to not take out loans that young. Save the debt for grad school when they have a better sense of what they want.


That is the smartest path. If you don't have the money saved (and saved while still adequately saving for retirement), then it is not smart to spend it. where you go does not really matter---what you do while in college matters much more. Outside of IB/High level finance as a 22 yo, it does not matter where you attend college. FAANG hires at much more than T20 schools. Your kid will be paid the same as kids at a T20. It's easier to distinguish yourself and get recommendations for grad school when you can be top dog at a school.

Anonymous
When I recruit, I am much more interested in state school graduates than private college graduates; I think of the latter as either spoiled or bad with math.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:When I recruit, I am much more interested in state school graduates than private college graduates; I think of the latter as either spoiled or bad with math.


Sounds like discrimination to me
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:When I recruit, I am much more interested in state school graduates than private college graduates; I think of the latter as either spoiled or bad with math.


Sounds like discrimination to me


Especially since many attend on Full FA or are full pay and can easily afford it. Given the choice between State U (with 20K+ undergrads) versus T25 (most with 4-7K undergrads) I do believe smaller is often better. Not 45K+ better unless you can easily afford it. But you shouldn't penalize those who choose it (most can afford it)
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Northwestern is very different than UVA. It’s a top top Tier 1 research university. It’s not the Harvard of the Midwest anymore, it’s actually the MIT of the Midwest.

Its humanities program is very good, but UVA likely is the same or exceed.

I was FA at NU and unless my child wanted to study one of the sciences or engineering there,
I would have them go to UVA. If it’s sciences, I would have them go to NU with a strong plan of how to engage their professors and get into an R&D lab. I work in technology and R&D now and the Stanford and MIT folks see my degree and know I’m not to be trifled with on the technical front, which is awesome. Maybe someday I can reach my full potential and sit on some tech or R&D heavy boards, and NU would play a role in that, but maybe not.

But if your younger son/daughter wants to be a lawyer or finance person, send him/her to UVA.


I went to NU and can somewhat get behind this. My spouse and I both majored in STEM, both got lab connections and both got second author on articles in good journals before graduating from undergrad. I got to work on some really complex analytical equipment as an undergrad. My spouse still regularly talks to the professor from his lab and gets students sent his way for referrals.

However, my husband also has worked with kids from local schools like Maryland and Mason who he met through internship programs and helped them connect with jobs too. So a motivated kid can do well anywhere.

If there's a specific program or professor, it's a consideration. But I'm most concerned about families and students who'd have to take on a lot of debt. Is it really going to be worth 400k, maybe more? I just am not sure. It's just a jaw dropping amount of money. My kids are young but despite both of us being alums, we're a bit skeptical.

Interestingly the NU alumni who interviewed me when I was 17 similarly cautioned me and asked me to think about my state school as an option (he was a lawyer). I got financial aid which made it easier.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I had this conversation with my SIL and nephew over thanksgiving. They have more money than us and easily are spending 90k a year for the kids in undergrad. I explained that we cannot go this route. We will fully pay for a solid in state public school because that’s what we can do. We will strongly advise them to not take out loans that young. Save the debt for grad school when they have a better sense of what they want.


And depending on the field they are in, they won't need to go to graduate school. I studied electrical engineering and most of my senior courses were cross listed with graduate courses. At my company very few engineers actually went to grad school.

If you want to be a doctor or lawyer then you obviously need a graduate education.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I had this conversation with my SIL and nephew over thanksgiving. They have more money than us and easily are spending 90k a year for the kids in undergrad. I explained that we cannot go this route. We will fully pay for a solid in state public school because that’s what we can do. We will strongly advise them to not take out loans that young. Save the debt for grad school when they have a better sense of what they want.


And depending on the field they are in, they won't need to go to graduate school. I studied electrical engineering and most of my senior courses were cross listed with graduate courses. At my company very few engineers actually went to grad school.

If you want to be a doctor or lawyer then you obviously need a graduate education.


Very few engineering majors "need" grad school. Unless they want their PHD/Academia/Hardcore research at a pharmaceutical or other type of company that requires it. Fact is you should get some work experience with just your BS---and if an advanced degree is needed then do it later. Much better to have a clue what area you want to focus your MS/PHD in rather than just doing it immediately. Most engineering don't need it. You learn on the job and advance from there.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:When I recruit, I am much more interested in state school graduates than private college graduates; I think of the latter as either spoiled or bad with math.


Sounds like discrimination to me


All of the competitive fields like investment banking absolutely discriminate. The whole college ranking thing is more or less a joke. You are buying a brand. I work with someone who did undergrad at a school ranked around 200-250 and then studied engineering at Univ of Michigan. He basically said that there wasn't much of a difference in terms of difficulty.
Anonymous
I would possibly choose UVA over Northwestern regardless of cost. Culture, etc.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I would possibly choose UVA over Northwestern regardless of cost. Culture, etc.


Well I would choose Northwestern any day over UVA. And did back in the day (well didn't even apply to UVA as NU was 10000x better for one of my majors) Really depends if you want to remain in VA all your life or meet people from all over the USA and the world at college

Anonymous
What would they study at each school? That could be a factor. I studied engineering at UMD and now I'm a software engineer at a FAANG and make 650k/yr working 40 hr/week. Had a gone to the elite private school I wanted to go to (didn't get in), I would have studied economics and had a horrible investment banking job working 80 hr/week and making less. The only reason I studied engineering is because UMD has a great engineering program and a horrible economics program. Or I would have pivoted and ended up on FAANG and made the same, maybe with some richer friends.
Anonymous
This seems like a pointless conversation because your child has yet to be accepted to both schools. Think about this AFTER. And like others have said, consider major, geography, and campus culture.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:When I recruit, I am much more interested in state school graduates than private college graduates; I think of the latter as either spoiled or bad with math.


So odd, bc it’s the really bright ones who get substantial scholarships at privates. State schools can’t offer the same scholarships.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I think it’s silly, no matter how much money you have.
If kid is brilliant, they will get merit scholarship.
If they are not, then college not for them.
Just my opinion.


This is a wild take. And off the mark of reality when it comes to merit scholarships.
Anonymous
I used to tell DH that it is better to buy our DC a house instead of paying for private from 3 years old till 22 years old. However DC got a job for 300k/year two years after college, so maybe it is worth it. Otherwise I still would have preferred to buy a house as gift.
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