Anyone on here with a current student at Princeton or very recent grad?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Unfortunately the part of Princeton "they" don't tell you about. As someone above mentioned a rather "rigid" and insular social structure. At this point the eating club dynamic is antiquated. Probably the best thing about the school is actually graduating from there. Tell your DC to sign up for a non-bicker and try to hang in there and graduate, two years will fly by in no time.

OP here yes I think that’s good advice. I wish that they could just make a couple of good friends and feel part of the community in some way.

Would your child have had difficulty making friends on any campus? Some kids are just hard-wired that way (like my DD) and the campus/college/university environment is irrelevant

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Unfortunately the part of Princeton "they" don't tell you about. As someone above mentioned a rather "rigid" and insular social structure. At this point the eating club dynamic is antiquated. Probably the best thing about the school is actually graduating from there. Tell your DC to sign up for a non-bicker and try to hang in there and graduate, two years will fly by in no time.

OP here yes I think that’s good advice. I wish that they could just make a couple of good friends and feel part of the community in some way.

Would your child have had difficulty making friends on any campus? Some kids are just hard-wired that way (like my DD) and the campus/college/university environment is irrelevant

No, not historically. Op here

[Anonymous]

OP, I strongly recommend Study Abroad. Being in a new place brings people together. Then follow some of those new kids to a sign-in EC.

Hugs to your kid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Failed at bicker?

That is tough.

Time to transfer.

OP here I think you are missing the point. Was saying people are siloed and has been trying for two years. Eating club was a path

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Unfortunately the part of Princeton "they" don't tell you about. As someone above mentioned a rather "rigid" and insular social structure. At this point the eating club dynamic is antiquated. Probably the best thing about the school is actually graduating from there. Tell your DC to sign up for a non-bicker and try to hang in there and graduate, two years will fly by in no time.

OP here yes I think that’s good advice. I wish that they could just make a couple of good friends and feel part of the community in some way.

Would your child have had difficulty making friends on any campus? Some kids are just hard-wired that way (like my DD) and the campus/college/university environment is irrelevant

No, not historically. Op here

Could you tell us more about your child's background - what types of interests do they have that you think got them admitted into Princeton in the first place?

Just being "mainstream and down to earth" alone doesn't tend to get a kid into Princeton, so they must have some other interests they could pursue in college (which is one way to make friends if for whatever reason they didn't find friends in their RA group or residential college). There is a sizable number of students who aren't interested in the bicker clubs at all, but get involved in other activities.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wonder if someone isn't trying to encourage an admitted student to turn down Princeton so their kid can get in off the waiting list. The admissions department indicated within the last week that they expect to make some offers within the next few weeks.

That wouldn’t be my first conclusion. Princeton is known to be kind of an unhappy place in recent years, hence all the suicides.

Nah, the vast majority of students have a great experience. You're wallowing in misery for reasons that have little to do with Princeton.

I know a few current students, I wouldn’t call it a joyful place, but kids make do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wonder if someone isn't trying to encourage an admitted student to turn down Princeton so their kid can get in off the waiting list. The admissions department indicated within the last week that they expect to make some offers within the next few weeks.

That wouldn’t be my first conclusion. Princeton is known to be kind of an unhappy place in recent years, hence all the suicides.

Nah, the vast majority of students have a great experience. You're wallowing in misery for reasons that have little to do with Princeton.

I know a few current students, I wouldn’t call it a joyful place, but kids make do.

I don’t think attending the top university in the country is a particular hardship. It’s not a cakewalk academically, though, and some kids struggle socially. However, a large majority of students surveyed recently say they’d do it all over again.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sounds like segregation is not uncommon at Princeton.

Sounds more like you don't know what you're talking about.

Speak for yourself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I wonder if someone isn't trying to encourage an admitted student to turn down Princeton so their kid can get in off the waiting list. The admissions department indicated within the last week that they expect to make some offers within the next few weeks.

Ummm. They would have already had to accept by now--it's May 28th. May 1st was the deadline.

The only scenario available in your strange fantasy would be to dissuade someone else from accepting a potential WL offer. As someone who does have a kid on the WL, that is about the most ridiculous thing I've read.

Just another person starting trouble more likely.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Unfortunately the part of Princeton "they" don't tell you about. As someone above mentioned a rather "rigid" and insular social structure. At this point the eating club dynamic is antiquated. Probably the best thing about the school is actually graduating from there. Tell your DC to sign up for a non-bicker and try to hang in there and graduate, two years will fly by in no time.

How are eating clubs different from fraternities and sororities? Sounds similar to me, but I’m curious.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Unfortunately the part of Princeton "they" don't tell you about. As someone above mentioned a rather "rigid" and insular social structure. At this point the eating club dynamic is antiquated. Probably the best thing about the school is actually graduating from there. Tell your DC to sign up for a non-bicker and try to hang in there and graduate, two years will fly by in no time.

OP here yes I think that’s good advice. I wish that they could just make a couple of good friends and feel part of the community in some way.

Would your child have had difficulty making friends on any campus? Some kids are just hard-wired that way (like my DD) and the campus/college/university environment is irrelevant

OP. Hugs from another parent.
My kid struggled socially in another pretty highly rated T-20. Found friends once major was declared. Small group goes to classes, studies together, works on group projects. Key is to find an activity with consistent 'bonding.' Clubs are often too casual. Sending Good energy to you and your child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wonder if someone isn't trying to encourage an admitted student to turn down Princeton so their kid can get in off the waiting list. The admissions department indicated within the last week that they expect to make some offers within the next few weeks.

That wouldn’t be my first conclusion. Princeton is known to be kind of an unhappy place in recent years, hence all the suicides.

Nah, the vast majority of students have a great experience. You're wallowing in misery for reasons that have little to do with Princeton.

To outsiders, this sounds exactly like the kind of misery that Princeton is known for.

I think Princeton has changed in recent years. Alumni from the past seem to have very fond memories and a lot of close friends. It’s the opposite for current students and more recent grads.

[Anonymous]

Just want to add to all the advice to seriously consider a study abroad semester. Have your kid get in touch with the office and ask if there are any programs that still have spots for the fall.

[Anonymous]

I’d recommend joining the sign in club or the 4 year colleges with the most people she knows. Even if most of her friends from first two years got into the bicker club of choice, 2 years is still a lot of time to develop new relationships. Social scene doesn’t have to be only through the eating clubs…foster friendships from classes and extracurriculars as well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I wonder if someone isn't trying to encourage an admitted student to turn down Princeton so their kid can get in off the waiting list. The admissions department indicated within the last week that they expect to make some offers within the next few weeks.

That wouldn’t be my first conclusion. Princeton is known to be kind of an unhappy place in recent years, hence all the suicides.

Nah, the vast majority of students have a great experience. You're wallowing in misery for reasons that have little to do with Princeton.

To outsiders, this sounds exactly like the kind of misery that Princeton is known for.

I think Princeton has changed in recent years. Alumni from the past seem to have very fond memories and a lot of close friends. It’s the opposite for current students and more recent grads.

A recent survey of graduating students found that 92% would attend Princeton again if they had a do-over. That’s a fairly high percentage, but maybe it was higher in the past.

If they wanted to boost the percentage of happy students they could inflate grades and offer admission to a less diverse group of students. They see their mission as offering unparalleled resources and opportunities to a diverse and talented group of students, but they don’t relax their academic standards like some T20 schools and they largely leave it up to students to chart their own academic and social paths (although all freshmen and sophomores are members of residential colleges that organize a lot of social events). They also have a lot of kids pursuing challenging STEM majors, and some struggle to keep up. The same thing happens in STEM programs at many universities, but it may hit differently at Princeton because you mostly have kids who’ve always known only success and may not have the same resilience as kids elsewhere.

For those who do navigate Princeton successfully, there’s generally no other place they’d rather have attended.