Anyone on here with a current student at Princeton or very recent grad?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My DC just finished their sophomore year. Went through bicker and did not get into eating club. (As the majority of people who bickered and most every they know!) They are a mainstream kid who has not found their people and doesn't have a group of friends in the way they would like. Frustrated with social structure of the school. Will mostly like join a sign in club in fall but they all seem to have a "personality" that is not their's. (LGBTQ, druggie etc). So miserable they are considering transferring. Can anyone with direct experience at the school over any advice or hope?

Sorry to hear. It’s a pretty common complaint.
I’d suggest transferring.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DC just finished their sophomore year. Went through bicker and did not get into eating club. (As the majority of people who bickered and most every they know!) They are a mainstream kid who has not found their people and doesn't have a group of friends in the way they would like. Frustrated with social structure of the school. Will mostly like join a sign in club in fall but they all seem to have a "personality" that is not their's. (LGBTQ, druggie etc). So miserable they are considering transferring. Can anyone with direct experience at the school over any advice or hope?

I know 6 families over the last 15 years who sent kids to Princeton.

3 athletic recruits , 3 normies

All umc from northeast but not dc umc level ses

The recruits stuck around, the normies transferred out - one to nescac and two to oos flagships

Make of that what you will

+10000

[Anonymous]

I knew nothing about these eating clubs until 30 minutes ago, coming across this thread. I just read about one of the open clubs...which counts Jeff Bezos as an alum. I think your kid will be fine.

[Anonymous]

Wouldn’t sign in already have happened? Starting to seem troll-y.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wouldn’t sign in already have happened? Starting to seem troll-y.

No in the fall

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wouldn’t sign in already have happened? Starting to seem troll-y.

Agree it reads like a troll post.

Was just observing the Class of 2024 at their Class Day celebration this weekend (Sam Waterston was their invited guest speaker) and they looked like an incredibly diverse, impressive group of seniors.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wouldn’t sign in already have happened? Starting to seem troll-y.

Agree it reads like a troll post.

Was just observing the Class of 2024 at their Class Day celebration this weekend (Sam Waterston was their invited guest speaker) and they looked like an incredibly diverse, impressive group of seniors.

I am the OP and I have absolutely no idea why this reads like a troll post. I wish it weren’t true. I am in no way saying it’s terrible school. It’s a wonderful school in many ways and probably 1 million interesting students. My student has just had trouble finding their tribe.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wouldn’t sign in already have happened? Starting to seem troll-y.

Agree it reads like a troll post.

Was just observing the Class of 2024 at their Class Day celebration this weekend (Sam Waterston was their invited guest speaker) and they looked like an incredibly diverse, impressive group of seniors.

I am the OP and I have absolutely no idea why this reads like a troll post. I wish it weren’t true. I am in no way saying it’s terrible school. It’s a wonderful school in many ways and probably 1 million interesting students. My student has just had trouble finding their tribe.

Very common for someone to accuse others of being a troll. Very boring.

OP: What type of person is your son/daughter seeking ?

I, too, suggest filling out & submitting transfer applications; this will cause your student to reevaluate his/her situation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wouldn’t sign in already have happened? Starting to seem troll-y.

Agree it reads like a troll post.

Was just observing the Class of 2024 at their Class Day celebration this weekend (Sam Waterston was their invited guest speaker) and they looked like an incredibly diverse, impressive group of seniors.

I am the OP and I have absolutely no idea why this reads like a troll post. I wish it weren’t true. I am in no way saying it’s terrible school. It’s a wonderful school in many ways and probably 1 million interesting students. My student has just had trouble finding their tribe.

How would you describe your kid's "tribe"?

[Anonymous]

Why is the social life there so rigidly structured?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wouldn’t sign in already have happened? Starting to seem troll-y.

Agree it reads like a troll post.

Was just observing the Class of 2024 at their Class Day celebration this weekend (Sam Waterston was their invited guest speaker) and they looked like an incredibly diverse, impressive group of seniors.

I am the OP and I have absolutely no idea why this reads like a troll post. I wish it weren’t true. I am in no way saying it’s terrible school. It’s a wonderful school in many ways and probably 1 million interesting students. My student has just had trouble finding their tribe.

Very common for someone to accuse others of being a troll. Very boring.

OP: What type of person is your son/daughter seeking ?

I, too, suggest filling out & submitting transfer applications; this will cause your student to reevaluate his/her situation.

Just regular mainstream down to earth people! Concern with transfer is hard to integrate socially junior year and no better off?

[Anonymous]

No Princeton experience but if they are going into Junior year, transferring out seems late for social improvement. It will be hard to integrate somewhere else in a meaningful way. Any why not stay to get the Princeton degree.

I'd recommend this route instead. Study abroad for one of their two remaining years. Either for an entire year in one place or for two separate semesters.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No Princeton experience but if they are going into Junior year, transferring out seems late for social improvement. It will be hard to integrate somewhere else in a meaningful way. Any why not stay to get the Princeton degree.

I'd recommend this route instead. Study abroad for one of their two remaining years. Either for an entire year in one place or for two separate semesters.

For example - if you can't manage to get abroad for the Fall (if that deadline has passed) - go abroad Jr year spring and Sr year fall. This will mean just getting through 2 semesters on campus, and spreading them out.

Could they also take summer classes to graduate early?

[Anonymous]

Do not transfer out of the Princeton brand name. No college is perfect. Your child needs to focus on academics and socially do whatever he/she wants to do. It's unfortunate that they are so sensitive to petty high school social dynamics. Princeton is incredible and they can do so much to maximize their experience there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am sympathetic but there seems to be a little “I wouldn’t want to belong to a club that would have me as a member” thinking going on here.

Np here, but I’m not sure what you are saying here with this?

It sounds like the kid thinks the sign in clubs are not right for her (because of their “personalities”) even though they are welcoming to everyone and therefore get lots of different kids. The bicker clubs have much stronger “personalities” and fewer “regular” kids because they are exclusionary—but that’s where she hopes to make friends.

I read OPs scenario as the bicker clubs had a broader set of "personalities" which included ones her DC felt she identified with and that when she considered the sign in clubs, the "personalities" did not include one her DC felt she identified with. I do agree, though, that if these sign-in clubs are more welcoming in nature (AND by construct), the DC should find one she feels best about (or knows another nice person signing up for) and give it a try.