DW refuses to dress out baby in anything but sleepers/rompers

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Does she have other signs of postpartum anxiety?

Weird, this is not a sign of postpartum anxiety.

And I've never met a dad who cares about this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:$1,000,000 on this post is from the MIL not the husband. Granny is upset that baby isn’t wearing the little suit she bought or the Prince George look a like outfit. No self respecting guy would notice let alone care that his baby son isn’t being dressed up in impractical gift outfits.

So my theory is that OP actually is the dad, but he's under heavy duress from the MIL who is demanding photos of the infant in the many ridiculous clothes she sent and is panicking because they baby is outgrowing the "newborn" and 0-3mo outfits already and she's not getting her moneys worth. So she harassing her son about it, and he's in turn harassing his wife, who is literally nursing a 3.5 week old baby around the clock and is just like "WTF who cares," the only appropriate response to anything this stupid when you have child who is less than a month old.

This poor woman is now going to be concern trolled by her own husband and his mother about how she must have PPA because, again, she isn't putting a 3 week old infant in enough "outfits."

[Anonymous]

Yeah. DH feeling this 3 weeks in, and posting to DCUM, is highly unlikely.

This is WAY more believable:


"DIL refuses to dress my grandbaby in anything but sleepers/rompers.

Essentially anything that’s not a one piece she won’t put on him. I (MIL) gifted her so many baby outfits and she will not put any two pieces on him and if I do she removes it at the next diaper change.

I asked her why and she claimed the baby pants were too tight on his abdomen and probably uncomfortable. She (DIL) is basically wasting my gifts and she doesn’t seem to care."

[Anonymous]

For once, DCUM is unanimous.


Op - you're being an idiot. Dress the baby how you like, take a picture, immediately put the baby back into rompers.

My wife puts the babies into rompers until they are a year old. She also does most of the childcare and diaper changing. Never occurred to me to comment

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Does she have other signs of postpartum anxiety?

Weird, this is not a sign of postpartum anxiety.

And I've never met a dad who cares about this.

Yes, claiming all the pants are too tight is definitely an anxiety red flag and I’m surprised more people aren’t picking upon this. Obviously wearing only rompers isn’t the end of the world but it sounds like she is not coping well right now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you wan to dress your child you should be able to do so. Why does your wife decide what the baby wears?

Many people dress their babies in clothes, it is normal. If there is an outfit you like or end any to wear (maybe gift giver is visiting), put it on baby.

Is your wife controlling in other ways?

Not usually she’s just very particular about how things are done with him.

She thinks that he doesn’t nurse as well in the outfits with pants because the waistband is too tight on his stomach. It’s not. It fits fine and he doesn’t seem uncomfortable I’m concerned it’s new mom anxiety on a whole new level.

Is she usually anxious? How old is the baby? If she starts to get anxious about regular everyday things or starts to try to control you and the environment, that is definitely worth a talk with the doctor.

3.5 weeks. I will keep that in mind to bring up at 6 weeks Appointment

Wait you are going to her obstetrician appointments? Does she not speak English? You seem very controlling for a DH.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think it would bother me if I dress the kid and then my spouse was changing it at the next diaper change (assuming no blow-out). The implication is that what I’m doing as a parent has to be undone. Sure it seems small, but these slights when you’re both new to this parenting world can feel huge and lead quickly to resentment and score keeping.

+1 it's a minor way of undermining that can leave to one parent feeling detached

They're undermining each other.

Op's wife says the baby nurses better in comfier clothes. Instead of reaching an agreement, Op unilaterally puts the baby in outfits that OP knows the wife doesn't want. That's undermining too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you wan to dress your child you should be able to do so. Why does your wife decide what the baby wears?

Many people dress their babies in clothes, it is normal. If there is an outfit you like or end any to wear (maybe gift giver is visiting), put it on baby.

Is your wife controlling in other ways?

Not usually she’s just very particular about how things are done with him.

She thinks that he doesn’t nurse as well in the outfits with pants because the waistband is too tight on his stomach. It’s not. It fits fine and he doesn’t seem uncomfortable I’m concerned it’s new mom anxiety on a whole new level.

Is she usually anxious? How old is the baby? If she starts to get anxious about regular everyday things or starts to try to control you and the environment, that is definitely worth a talk with the doctor.

3.5 weeks. I will keep that in mind to bring up at 6 weeks Appointment

Your baby is 3.5 weeks old and you are on here complaining about how your wife dresses him? She's worried about his comfort while you want to play dress up with him like he's a freaking doll?

The audacity. The sheer audacity.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:$1,000,000 on this post is from the MIL not the husband. Granny is upset that baby isn’t wearing the little suit she bought or the Prince George look a like outfit. No self respecting guy would notice let alone care that his baby son isn’t being dressed up in impractical gift outfits.

So my theory is that OP actually is the dad, but he's under heavy duress from the MIL who is demanding photos of the infant in the many ridiculous clothes she sent and is panicking because they baby is outgrowing the "newborn" and 0-3mo outfits already and she's not getting her moneys worth. So she harassing her son about it, and he's in turn harassing his wife, who is literally nursing a 3.5 week old baby around the clock and is just like "WTF who cares," the only appropriate response to anything this stupid when you have child who is less than a month old.

This poor woman is now going to be concern trolled by her own husband and his mother about how she must have PPA because, again, she isn't putting a 3 week old infant in enough "outfits."

This!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Does she have other signs of postpartum anxiety?

Weird, this is not a sign of postpartum anxiety.

And I've never met a dad who cares about this.

Yes, claiming all the pants are too tight is definitely an anxiety red flag and I’m surprised more people aren’t picking upon this. Obviously wearing only rompers isn’t the end of the world but it sounds like she is not coping well right now.

Nope. The flag is “Dad’s” controlling attitude and behavior — which seems designed Yo induce anxiety in the mother of a newborn.
The second flag is in your comment assuming that you magically know how clothes you haven’t seen fit a baby you have never met. You know nothing about the size of the baby, the size of the clothes, or the design of the clothes. Lots of babies never fit newborn clothes, for example.
Dad sounds like a lot to cope with. I hope the Mom has some support with that.

[Anonymous]

My oldest is a teen now and I never put any of my three kids into anything but soft one piece outfits when they were that little except if it was a photo-op for the giver. I had no PPD, anxiety or grudges against the in-laws: those outfits really are just easiest in terms of changes and feeding.

If you don’t like what she puts your kid into, change the outfit every time you change him. But if she’s the one doing the bulk of care, as seems to be the case, she gets to pick the bulk of his clothes.

Also, as someone with much older children, you have a tough touch road ahead of you, OP, if you are this worked up and controlling this early on. Also, if your wife doesn’t blow up at you when you complain to the pediatrician that she has anxiety because she only puts the kid in one piece outfits, she’s a calmer woman than almost any woman living. Good luck!

[Anonymous]

I know why one piece wth a snap bottom is convenient, but why is a romper better than pants?

[Anonymous]

She sounds fabulous!!! That’s a smart mom! He doesn’t need pants and they do hurt the abdomen. Be grateful she cares so much!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I know why one piece wth a snap bottom is convenient, but why is a romper better than pants?

New poster here. My babies were all in rompers and sleepers until a year old or so. For me, it was the hassle of finding the matching pieces. So you know how people give you like, the top and matching bottom? Like the shirt with the car and then the little pants with the car pattern? I was so unbelievably tired and disorganized that I could never really find 2 of a matching set at once. So then it would be like blue car top with brown monkey pants or whatever and it just was a hassle and looked silly. Rompers and sleepers…were easy. Pick one and put on the baby. No digging around for matching pieces. You don’t even need socks in the winter if they have a sleeper on! So much easier for me.

We did dress baby in a couple of cute outfits for certain special events but they were definitely not the norm!

[Anonymous]

OP, is the possibility that some baby outfits go unworn worth the stress this will bring to your marriage?