My BFF will only date "tall" men so that she feels small in comparison

[Anonymous]

Simple statistics- about 1 in 7 men are above 6ft, so if that's a mandatory trait, you're already eliminating a majority from consideration before things like career, values, hobbies, etc come into play. Then throw in the general cutthroat nature of DC dating and those eligible 6ft men are very aware that they can play the field. OP's friend is entitled to keep holding out, but if she's looking for a relationship with real substance, it seems a bit misguided to place a trait men have zero control over as priority #1

[Anonymous]

No one wants a short man.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Simple statistics- about 1 in 7 men are above 6ft, so if that's a mandatory trait, you're already eliminating a majority from consideration before things like career, values, hobbies, etc come into play. Then throw in the general cutthroat nature of DC dating and those eligible 6ft men are very aware that they can play the field. OP's friend is entitled to keep holding out, but if she's looking for a relationship with real substance, it seems a bit misguided to place a trait men have zero control over as priority #1

What does control have to do with anything? Most of the traits women *should* find most important fall into this category, like impulse control, executive function, IQ, etc.

[Anonymous]

Why are you so hung up on your friend's kinks? I think the correct response here is "more for me!" and carry on with your life.

[Anonymous]

People find different things attractive - who cares that height is an issue for your friend. I'm only 5'3" and pretty much just find tall men attractive. The shortest person I dated was 6'1" and my DH is 6'4". People are allowed to have personal preferences.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She is 55, she likes what she likes. Leave her TF alone.

She clearly doesn’t NEED a man she just prefers certain ones.

WTF do you care who she dates?

I care that I just discovered she's kind of pathetic.

You're salty.

[Anonymous]

I'm also 55 and I think this 6ft thing is just backlash over so many years where women were judged for physical attributes they had no control over. I've been married for 20 years but at no point did I ever consider a guy's height when I was dating. I'm 5'5" and dated a couple of guys who were my height. It didn't even occur to me that it would be an issue. They were both great guys. One frequently dated taller women - he was in demand.

I had a friend who was weirdly picky with OLD and treated one guy she met really poorly over something (not height, but another kind of thing he couldn't necessarily control) and I eventually ended that friendship - more due to other things, but that was something that really made me think about the kind of person she was.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
What does control have to do with anything? Most of the traits women *should* find most important fall into this category, like impulse control, executive function, IQ, etc.

It's relevant because a man can refine those social and decision making skills as he matures. If height is the primary factor then 5'9 men who possess said impulse control, IQ, etc never get consideration to begin with. Again, people are entitled to preferences, but something like a 6ft requirement shrinks the dating pool even before one gets into how compatible their personalities may be

[Anonymous]

We all have things we're attracted to. I like relatively skinny, tall men with nice arms. Do we need to psychoanalyze this or can we just accept that it's my biology?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Did you see this SNL skit about how the NFL gives back?

"The football is you"

Gold!

+1 LOVE It. To the poster who said the ad is offensive .... of course it is, it is SNL!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m only 5’10 and in college played soccer and with all the running could not gain weight. It would be another eight years before I wandered into a weight room. (Wish I’d started earlier).

My college GF had previously dated a burly football player and she often commented on how short I seemed. We should have just broken up—we were clearly both insecure kids, and it was only years later before I realized her issue at the time was that being with me made her feel like a middle linebacker.

This was in the 90s, when culture pushed women to be skinny rather than strong, so it could be generational for your friend. Now they all want that big centaur ass.

Ha. I’m a female soccer player of your generation. And I was always very muscular- big muscular soccer thighs and it was a fine when the waif/skin abs bones look was the thing.

Every guy I was attracted to and dated was 5’10”. Though men in my own family are 6’1-6’2”.

Fwiw, soccer players have the best bods of all male athletes.

DP.

I agree that soccer players are gorgeous.

However, my chances of finding a soccer player with whom I am compatible are even less than those of finding a tall man.

Tall men can afford to gain weight and still look decent.
My tall DH has a belly and is about 20 pounds overweight, but when he is walking out of the room, his long legs make me weak.It would take a shorter man more work and discipline to have legs like that.

Tall people just carry weight better.

But yeah, a shorter man who is athletic and works hard to maintain ( not stocky- I don't like that look), looks very nice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She is 55, she likes what she likes. Leave her TF alone.

She clearly doesn’t NEED a man she just prefers certain ones.

WTF do you care who she dates?

I care that I just discovered she's kind of pathetic.

She’s attracted to what she’s attracted to. You don’t know why. It’s her business if she can’t get it up for anyone under 6 feet.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who cares? Tall men are the equivalent of skinny women for men - sometimes it’s literally the only thing they care about.

I care, because I am concerned my friends is mentally damaged and I've missed that all these years. OP

"Mentally damaged" because she's only attracted to taller men? I hope you also think men who only date thin women are mentally damaged as well

[Anonymous]

I was always a height doesn’t matter it’s the person, person. Never in a relationship with anyone over 5’9”, which is my height.

Had great sex.

Recently got serious with someone who is 6’3”. It’s a little too tall. But, don’t know if I can ever go back to under 6 feet.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She is 55, she likes what she likes. Leave her TF alone.

She clearly doesn’t NEED a man she just prefers certain ones.

WTF do you care who she dates?

I care that I just discovered she's kind of pathetic.

She’s attracted to what she’s attracted to. You don’t know why. It’s her business if she can’t get it up for anyone under 6 feet.

Most reasonable adults are at least open to the idea that someone who isn't their usual physical preference can be attractive under the right circumstances. It sounds like OP's friend isn't, which is pretty rigid. That said, calling her preference "pathetic" or saying she's "mentally damaged" is way over the top. I can't imagine caring so much about my friend's preferences