Pressure from Teacher Gifts

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The class parents gossip and talk. It’s not the teachers you have to worry about.

Truly we don't.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The class parents gossip and talk. It’s not the teachers you have to worry about.

Truly we don't.

Bull.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why does this bother you? Teachers make so little and public education is free. Why not give $20 for the holidays? These people are literally with your kids all day every day for most of the year. I don’t get why you wouldn’t want to participate. If you are truly broke, then just ignore. If you are being cheap, then just give.

They are with kids because it’s their job. Our first grade teacher makes $90,000 for 9 months of work, it’s not that bad!

School name?

It doesn’t matter what school it is. It matters what step the teacher is on. If the teacher has been there over 15 years it’s absolutely possible she is on the step that makes this much.

[Anonymous]

The only time they ask for money is now and eoy. They do a teacher appreciation gift card collection in April where they collect gift cards for all staff. I have room momed before and we are happy with any amount we collect even if it's $5. The other more recent thing is I noticed a teacher birthday collection. They don't do this for all the teachers, just some and I think it's a nice thing but it's a bit much. I prefer having the kids make cards but I think $5 is ok for this. So if you give $10 for eoy and holiday, that is $20 for the entire year. If you live in this area, I don't think that's going to break your bank, especially since people will spend $6 on a crappy cup of Starbucks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why does this bother you? Teachers make so little and public education is free. Why not give $20 for the holidays? These people are literally with your kids all day every day for most of the year. I don’t get why you wouldn’t want to participate. If you are truly broke, then just ignore. If you are being cheap, then just give.

They are with kids because it’s their job. Our first grade teacher makes $90,000 for 9 months of work, it’s not that bad!

School name?

195 days is more like 10 months.

[Anonymous]

Gift soliciting 2-3 times per year is too much. I just decided to ignore those emails and occupy my mind on something productive. I don’t give power to solicitors. You can do it, OP. Stay strong and confident.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP- I just feel that if I can’t give my child will be singled and and it will be noticed by the teacher. It doesn’t feel fair. We don’t go out and buy new gifts for our own kids, we get a lot of hand me downs, which we appreciate. I just wish this practice wasn’t done.

A handmade card is just fine. Teachers don't want you to choose between gifts and your family's needs. Even a $5-10 gift card is ok.

The best teachers appreciate a simple handmade card. They don’t accept expensive gifts. But the mediocre teachers and the ones with devil personality will dump your little gift cards and handmade cards.

[Anonymous]

I give each teacher an amazon gift card and a wonderful handwritten card from my kid. If the teacher is exceptional, they get an email where I cc the principal too.

OP, you do you. No need to get stressed. How will you handle life?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP- I just feel that if I can’t give my child will be singled and and it will be noticed by the teacher. It doesn’t feel fair. We don’t go out and buy new gifts for our own kids, we get a lot of hand me downs, which we appreciate. I just wish this practice wasn’t done.

OP - the teacher has no idea who contributed to the class gift. You're good.

[Anonymous]

I hated when room parents seemed like they were asking for money all the time. Then, I became one. It’s a massive, thankless job. Part of that job is collecting for class gifts from the class to the teacher for TAW, Xmas and end of school year. The card will note it’s from the whole class…but is so much better when everyone just contributes to the one big gift. As a room parent, it also looks kinda of cheap to present a $75 gift card for Xmas from 30 kids. I’ve done both and I’ve experienced both as the room parent and as a teacher.

If you don’t want to give or are unable to, don’t. It’s no big deal at all. Don’t stress about it - it defeats the whole purpose of the season. We love your kids no matter what.

If you want to give, as a room parent, giving to the class gift is preferred. As a teacher, I had lots of small gift cards floating around and, logistically, it’s easier to have one rather than lots. (I don’t teach now but I still have a drawer of small gift cards because I often forget about them or don’t have them handy when I need them.)

Teachers appreciate anything - from a cherry greeting, to a card to a gift.

Finally, as both room parent and teacher, I’ve contributed way, way more for class expenses than I ever collected. Again, it’s a thankless job and people get annoyed at you for doing what is your job. And yes - at our elem school - collecting for class gifts to the teacher IS part of the job.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The class parents gossip and talk. It’s not the teachers you have to worry about.

Truly we don't.

Bull.

I mean, if this is your response, nothing anyone says will change your mind. But I posted upthread and was a room mom for many of my child's ES, was/am on PTA, and volunteered a lot. There are way too many kids and too many parents for them to care whether you donate to a class gift. That is at the bottom of the list. Not even worth gossiping about. It just did not happen at our ES.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP- I just feel that if I can’t give my child will be singled and and it will be noticed by the teacher. It doesn’t feel fair. We don’t go out and buy new gifts for our own kids, we get a lot of hand me downs, which we appreciate. I just wish this practice wasn’t done.

A handmade card is just fine. Teachers don't want you to choose between gifts and your family's needs. Even a $5-10 gift card is ok.

The best teachers appreciate a simple handmade card. They don’t accept expensive gifts. But the mediocre teachers and the ones with devil personality will dump your little gift cards and handmade cards.

I am not sure if I am more put off my your “judginess” or your willingness to think the worst of people. Try and find the Christmas spirit, perhaps?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why does this bother you? Teachers make so little and public education is free. Why not give $20 for the holidays? These people are literally with your kids all day every day for most of the year. I don’t get why you wouldn’t want to participate. If you are truly broke, then just ignore. If you are being cheap, then just give.

They are with kids because it’s their job. Our first grade teacher makes $90,000 for 9 months of work, it’s not that bad!

School name?

Yeah, 90 thousand a year? I think not. Look at our salary charts, sweetheart.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why does this bother you? Teachers make so little and public education is free. Why not give $20 for the holidays? These people are literally with your kids all day every day for most of the year. I don’t get why you wouldn’t want to participate. If you are truly broke, then just ignore. If you are being cheap, then just give.

They are with kids because it’s their job. Our first grade teacher makes $90,000 for 9 months of work, it’s not that bad!

School name?

Yeah, 90 thousand a year? I think not. Look at our salary charts, sweetheart.

DP
I’m an ES teacher and I’m a little surprised by your response. The first grade teacher could be making $90k. A teacher on step 14 with a MA has surpassed $90k. Someone entering FCPS with 15 years experience and a MA starts at just under $89k.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I hated when room parents seemed like they were asking for money all the time. Then, I became one. It’s a massive, thankless job. Part of that job is collecting for class gifts from the class to the teacher for TAW, Xmas and end of school year. The card will note it’s from the whole class…but is so much better when everyone just contributes to the one big gift. As a room parent, it also looks kinda of cheap to present a $75 gift card for Xmas from 30 kids. I’ve done both and I’ve experienced both as the room parent and as a teacher.

If you don’t want to give or are unable to, don’t. It’s no big deal at all. Don’t stress about it - it defeats the whole purpose of the season. We love your kids no matter what.

If you want to give, as a room parent, giving to the class gift is preferred. As a teacher, I had lots of small gift cards floating around and, logistically, it’s easier to have one rather than lots. (I don’t teach now but I still have a drawer of small gift cards because I often forget about them or don’t have them handy when I need them.)

Teachers appreciate anything - from a cherry greeting, to a card to a gift.

Finally, as both room parent and teacher, I’ve contributed way, way more for class expenses than I ever collected. Again, it’s a thankless job and people get annoyed at you for doing what is your job. And yes - at our elem school - collecting for class gifts to the teacher IS part of the job.

And yet many classes don’t have room parents.