When you meet other moms and their kids, what signals upper class?

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I’m thinking of a mom who is very well put-together, trim, and pretty. Her kids are well behaved, other than a short-lived pout, and the family lives in one of those nice custom homes spanning 5 or 6,000 square feet in a good school district. The kids are wearing nice clothes, brand name shoes and go to nice camps.

The family vacations in Hawaii, Mexico, the Caribbean and may travel back to their home country in August.

Is this spot on? If not, what signals wealth with families in the DMV?

This is MC.

Upper class is articulate, confident kids who can communicate with adults and children alike. All family members are trim and fit. Vacation at St Barts, Aspen, and Europe. Have at least one vacation home. Multiple kids in private school. Kind and not snobby. Live in 2500+ Sq ft house.... I say that because size doesn't matter as much as location and quality. House (no matter size) probably cost 1.5+.... I say this because some people just don't trade up as they age. They stay put, like Warren Buffet. Nice cars, may or may not be expensive, all in good condition.

It’s upper MC.

No it takes being in the top 2% in this city (or country) to sustain this. That is quantitative not qualitative. The only other way to define UC would be the way Europeans do, by royalty and titles. This is America, we define it by money. The top 2-5% are UC. Most have the above lifestyle. There will always be someone with more, but it doesn't mean you are UMC because you know someone with more.

+1

Top 5% income in US is 200,000. I don’t consider that upper class.

If you have top 5% wealth ($3M in assets) combined with HHI of top 5% (~300k in 2022), you are UC statically. What "you consider" is not an objective measure and therefore doesn't matter.

We have a HHI that puts us at the top 1%. I do not consider ourselves UC. We live a very UMC life. Our lifestyle hasn’t changed much from when we earned 500k to now earning more than $2m+.

Your lifestyle doesn’t change what socio-economic class you’re in.

Why not? Isn't there a social part to it? It's not just income derived.

Ahhh, now you're thinking lie a European with all the tastes and habits and snobbery, etc. Socio- in the American sense means that you focus on education, will probably pay for your kids' educations, give them opportunities, etc. You don't necessarily need to have all the tastes of the UC, just the ability to buy the opportunity other UC folks buy.

Sounds like you have your own narrowly defined rules for the "classes". It's not a strict income classification, if it was then we would all agree.

[Anonymous]

Ahhh, now you're thinking lie a European with all the tastes and habits and snobbery, etc. Socio- in the American sense means that you focus on education, will probably pay for your kids' educations, give them opportunities, etc. You don't necessarily need to have all the tastes of the UC, just the ability to buy the opportunity other UC folks buy.

Yeah, those Europeans are so snobbish, whereas DCUM class-obsessed crowd just cares about the eductation

[Anonymous]

How long does a family have to making that income before considered part of that class?

We now make over $500k (but $200k of it is bonus), but haven't been at this income very long. I do not really feel top 5%.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m thinking of a mom who is very well put-together, trim, and pretty. Her kids are well behaved, other than a short-lived pout, and the family lives in one of those nice custom homes spanning 5 or 6,000 square feet in a good school district. The kids are wearing nice clothes, brand name shoes and go to nice camps.

The family vacations in Hawaii, Mexico, the Caribbean and may travel back to their home country in August.

Is this spot on? If not, what signals wealth with families in the DMV?

Mother and children are frequently together? In the same place?

Gauche new-money behavior.

[Anonymous]

What you need to do is when you shake hands, scratch their palm lightly with your index finger. I learned this in my sorority and it always works to signal that I am upper class.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What you need to do is when you shake hands, scratch their palm lightly with your index finger. I learned this in my sorority and it always works to signal that I am upper class.

I do this, but it's to feel for lizard skin. Only then can I be sure you are one of the uber-wealthy reptilian overlords.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What you need to do is when you shake hands, scratch their palm lightly with your index finger. I learned this in my sorority and it always works to signal that I am upper class.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How long does a family have to making that income before considered part of that class?

We now make over $500k (but $200k of it is bonus), but haven't been at this income very long. I do not really feel top 5%.

It’s not about your “feelings.” You make a lot of money. The end.

[Anonymous]

Cut the guesswork out. I break into their homes, dig around their office, and check out their financial statements. I’m not taking any chances.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m thinking of a mom who is very well put-together, trim, and pretty. Her kids are well behaved, other than a short-lived pout, and the family lives in one of those nice custom homes spanning 5 or 6,000 square feet in a good school district. The kids are wearing nice clothes, brand name shoes and go to nice camps.

The family vacations in Hawaii, Mexico, the Caribbean and may travel back to their home country in August.

Is this spot on? If not, what signals wealth with families in the DMV?

This is MC.

Upper class is articulate, confident kids who can communicate with adults and children alike. All family members are trim and fit. Vacation at St Barts, Aspen, and Europe. Have at least one vacation home. Multiple kids in private school. Kind and not snobby. Live in 2500+ Sq ft house.... I say that because size doesn't matter as much as location and quality. House (no matter size) probably cost 1.5+.... I say this because some people just don't trade up as they age. They stay put, like Warren Buffet. Nice cars, may or may not be expensive, all in good condition.

It’s upper MC.

No it takes being in the top 2% in this city (or country) to sustain this. That is quantitative not qualitative. The only other way to define UC would be the way Europeans do, by royalty and titles. This is America, we define it by money. The top 2-5% are UC. Most have the above lifestyle. There will always be someone with more, but it doesn't mean you are UMC because you know someone with more.

+1

Top 5% income in US is 200,000. I don’t consider that upper class.

If you have top 5% wealth ($3M in assets) combined with HHI of top 5% (~300k in 2022), you are UC statically. What "you consider" is not an objective measure and therefore doesn't matter.

Interesting. We have both of those (but on the lower end - DH makes about $325-350k and our assets are just over $3M) and I SAH. No nanny, no private school. Fun camps but nothing ritzy. No second home, nice vacation but modest lodging (not ritz or 4 Seasons.) Standard 90’s colonial in a nice enough but not posh suburb. Drive Hondas.

DCUM would laugh their a$$es off if I tried to claim UC status.

True. That is mostly because the divide between the top 0.5% and the top 5% is much wider than the divide between the 5% and those living in poverty.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m thinking of a mom who is very well put-together, trim, and pretty. Her kids are well behaved, other than a short-lived pout, and the family lives in one of those nice custom homes spanning 5 or 6,000 square feet in a good school district. The kids are wearing nice clothes, brand name shoes and go to nice camps.

The family vacations in Hawaii, Mexico, the Caribbean and may travel back to their home country in August.

Is this spot on? If not, what signals wealth with families in the DMV?

This is MC.

Upper class is articulate, confident kids who can communicate with adults and children alike. All family members are trim and fit. Vacation at St Barts, Aspen, and Europe. Have at least one vacation home. Multiple kids in private school. Kind and not snobby. Live in 2500+ Sq ft house.... I say that because size doesn't matter as much as location and quality. House (no matter size) probably cost 1.5+.... I say this because some people just don't trade up as they age. They stay put, like Warren Buffet. Nice cars, may or may not be expensive, all in good condition.

It’s upper MC.

No it takes being in the top 2% in this city (or country) to sustain this. That is quantitative not qualitative. The only other way to define UC would be the way Europeans do, by royalty and titles. This is America, we define it by money. The top 2-5% are UC. Most have the above lifestyle. There will always be someone with more, but it doesn't mean you are UMC because you know someone with more.

+1

Top 5% income in US is 200,000. I don’t consider that upper class.

If you have top 5% wealth ($3M in assets) combined with HHI of top 5% (~300k in 2022), you are UC statically. What "you consider" is not an objective measure and therefore doesn't matter.

Interesting. We have both of those (but on the lower end - DH makes about $325-350k and our assets are just over $3M) and I SAH. No nanny, no private school. Fun camps but nothing ritzy. No second home, nice vacation but modest lodging (not ritz or 4 Seasons.) Standard 90’s colonial in a nice enough but not posh suburb. Drive Hondas.

DCUM would laugh their a$$es off if I tried to claim UC status.

Similar situation here. I also SAH, but at this income I do feel more breathing room to put DS in expensive theatre camp, sign up for things we don't need (like school bus service). I drive a 6 year old Subaru and our house was $1mm. I wouldn't dare try to talk about money or claim I'm not rich in from of others, though. Especially my parents and in-laws generation.

[Anonymous]

Your description covers most of Arlington north of Langton Blvd. Some of those women are crazy rich and some are strivers barely hanging on. It’s not always clear who is who - and it doesn’t really matter.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m thinking of a mom who is very well put-together, trim, and pretty. Her kids are well behaved, other than a short-lived pout, and the family lives in one of those nice custom homes spanning 5 or 6,000 square feet in a good school district. The kids are wearing nice clothes, brand name shoes and go to nice camps.

The family vacations in Hawaii, Mexico, the Caribbean and may travel back to their home country in August.

Is this spot on? If not, what signals wealth with families in the DMV?

This is MC.

Upper class is articulate, confident kids who can communicate with adults and children alike. All family members are trim and fit. Vacation at St Barts, Aspen, and Europe. Have at least one vacation home. Multiple kids in private school. Kind and not snobby. Live in 2500+ Sq ft house.... I say that because size doesn't matter as much as location and quality. House (no matter size) probably cost 1.5+.... I say this because some people just don't trade up as they age. They stay put, like Warren Buffet. Nice cars, may or may not be expensive, all in good condition.

It’s upper MC.

No it takes being in the top 2% in this city (or country) to sustain this. That is quantitative not qualitative. The only other way to define UC would be the way Europeans do, by royalty and titles. This is America, we define it by money. The top 2-5% are UC. Most have the above lifestyle. There will always be someone with more, but it doesn't mean you are UMC because you know someone with more.

+1

Top 5% income in US is 200,000. I don’t consider that upper class.

If you have top 5% wealth ($3M in assets) combined with HHI of top 5% (~300k in 2022), you are UC statically. What "you consider" is not an objective measure and therefore doesn't matter.

Interesting. We have both of those (but on the lower end - DH makes about $325-350k and our assets are just over $3M) and I SAH. No nanny, no private school. Fun camps but nothing ritzy. No second home, nice vacation but modest lodging (not ritz or 4 Seasons.) Standard 90’s colonial in a nice enough but not posh suburb. Drive Hondas.

DCUM would laugh their a$$es off if I tried to claim UC status.

Similar situation here. I also SAH, but at this income I do feel more breathing room to put DS in expensive theatre camp, sign up for things we don't need (like school bus service). I drive a 6 year old Subaru and our house was $1mm. I wouldn't dare try to talk about money or claim I'm not rich in from of others, though. Especially my parents and in-laws generation.

Oh! I also bought kind of last minute plane tickets at almost $1600 for two people to visit family. If I were "really" rich, I'd be flying first or business. I guess that's my marker. I know for others rich means flying private.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your description covers most of Arlington north of Langton Blvd. Some of those women are crazy rich and some are strivers barely hanging on. It’s not always clear who is who - and it doesn’t really matter.

Bingo

[Anonymous]

Just because someone has the clothes, new cars, fancy camps, second home doesn't mean they aren't up to their eyeballs in debt and on the brink of bankruptcy. Just because they are spending like they have it doesn't mean much and doesn't signify class. When it's all taken from you, then what?