Cry it out is the most heartless and cruel thing you can do to a child…

[Anonymous]

Never did CIO. Kid is a perfect sleeper. Falls asleep within 2 minutes in his bed and sleeps soundly all night in his own room. He is now 6. So glad we never did CIO.

[Anonymous]

If you think CIO (done correctly, especially) and giving your child (and you) the gift of sleep is the cruelest thing you can do to a child, you’ve led a very charmed life and need to get some perspective.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Let’s get real. The only reason to CIO is to support parents’ sanity, livelihood, marital relationship, etc. It doesn’t help children sleep more or better—that’s delusion parents use to justify their choice. Happens to be the same reasoning people used when spanking kids “for their own good”. They too believed it was important for establishing boundaries, learning to self-regulate, etc.

Any infant who is on a good schedule, gets enough sunlight early and has a caregiver willing to work with the child’s clock rather than their own (yes that usually means rocking and soothing them to sleep for several months) will get enough sleep. Any outliers are ill—the last kids who should be left to cry

+1

CIO was developed as a "method" in order to facilitate the way we raise kids in the US -- dual income families, minimal family or community support. Babies are expected to get on adult schedules as quickly as possible because there is such limited accommodation for children.

In countries with sufficient parental leave and more support for young families, CIO is not a thing because it's not necessary. Even when both parents work, there is often extended family or communal support that enables the parents to work. Or families work alternate schedules. The idea that a couple will get their child STTN by month 2 or 3 so that the parents can get uninterrupted sleep without the assistance of extended family and then return to pre-baby schedules at work, is a uniquely American phenomenon.

Go ask people in other societies about Ferber or CIO or any of this. They don't know what you are talking about. Babies don't need to be "trained" to sleep. It's just in the country we train them to function as much like adults as possible to accommodate a culture that does not accommodate children or families but expects them to accommodate everyone else.

+1 yes! I am from Europe and I have never heard of letting kids cry in out to sleep. It’s an American thing. Most French or Italian babies are not sleep deprived… their parents? Yes maybe.
Being from another country, I could never met my child cry himself to sleep… and my parents would probably disowned me if I did (jk)

[Anonymous]

Tried this for like 10 min one time and just could not let the baby cry like that. Waited one more month and baby started sleeping through the night with no training. If it works for you then great. It’s is not for everyone.

[Anonymous]

Do NOT feel guilty. They learn to SLEEP!!!!

[Anonymous]

I had a kid who cried constantly. Rocking him or holding him didn't help. At 6 weeks I just put him down and let him scream.

One night of that, and he slept through the night from then on. His whole disposition was happier, as was ours.

Kids are different. But sleep is good for everyone.

[Anonymous]

I think it’s crueler to have an exhausted baby because you’re too scared to fix a problem. “Oh, I just couldn’t make him sad!” is a terrible way to parent.

[Anonymous]

Babies catch up on their sleep during the day regardless of if they are good sleepers or not at night. So the excuse that you are teaching your kids to be well rested and not sleep deprived is pure BS. I think it is a cruel and heartless thing that some parents do to their children and it is sad. However, it is not my circus and not my monkeys. Do what you want with your children, how do I care? How is it my business.

Life is not fair and many people get abusive and neglectful parents. CIO is not as bad as other things you can do to your kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you think CIO (done correctly, especially) and giving your child (and you) the gift of sleep is the cruelest thing you can do to a child, you’ve led a very charmed life and need to get some perspective.

There is no “gift of sleep” any more thanks there is a “gift of suckling” or “gift of appetite”.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s so funny that proponents of CIO think babies not subjected to this are sleep deprived and their parents are up all night. Not at all. Babies don’t need to be trained to sleep.
I coslept with mine for years. Once they were past needing diaper changes at night (a few weeks?), all I had to do was roll over, nurse, go back to sleep. Didn’t even need to fully wake up, & there was literally no crying. My kids are older now & sleep just fine. No “training” required.
There’s a reason it feels so wrong to ignore a young baby’s cries.

This is the funniest thing I've read all week on DCUM. You're saying parents are cruel for sleep training and then in the next breath say you coslept?!?!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Babies catch up on their sleep during the day regardless of if they are good sleepers or not at night. So the excuse that you are teaching your kids to be well rested and not sleep deprived is pure BS. I think it is a cruel and heartless thing that some parents do to their children and it is sad. However, it is not my circus and not my monkeys. Do what you want with your children, how do I care? How is it my business.

Life is not fair and many people get abusive and neglectful parents. CIO is not as bad as other things you can do to your kids.

But it’s still bad, PP. I don’t like to see any baby (or monkey) treated cruelty.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think it’s crueler to have an exhausted baby because you’re too scared to fix a problem. “Oh, I just couldn’t make him sad!” is a terrible way to parent.

WE DON’T HAVE EXHAUSTED BABIES!!

How many times do you have to be told?!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I had a kid who cried constantly. Rocking him or holding him didn't help. At 6 weeks I just put him down and let him scream.

One night of that, and he slept through the night from then on. His whole disposition was happier, as was ours.

Kids are different. But sleep is good for everyone.

You let you baby in pain and abandoned. He gave up because there was no hope of anyone coming to help him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I had a kid who cried constantly. Rocking him or holding him didn't help. At 6 weeks I just put him down and let him scream.

One night of that, and he slept through the night from then on. His whole disposition was happier, as was ours.

Kids are different. But sleep is good for everyone.

You let you baby in pain and abandoned. He gave up because there was no hope of anyone coming to help him.

Cue all the guilty parents pretending to laugh.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I had a kid who cried constantly. Rocking him or holding him didn't help. At 6 weeks I just put him down and let him scream.

One night of that, and he slept through the night from then on. His whole disposition was happier, as was ours.

Kids are different. But sleep is good for everyone.

You let you baby in pain and abandoned. He gave up because there was no hope of anyone coming to help him.

Blah blah blah. He is an adult now and laughing at your comment.