Still in love with AP

[Anonymous]

Choosing to be with an AP is not the sunshine and rainbows you think it will be. All the children involved will have strong emotional feelings about the affair, and this will be a major source of tension on your relationship. As the female, you will always be viewed as the home wrecking wh@@e, no matter how unfair that stigma actually is. 20 years from now, people will still be whispering about you, and you can pretend not to care but you will always, always be the villain in the story. Every family event, every gathering of relatives, people will be whispering about it and it is exhausting.

The life you imagine with him is not the life you will actually have. I don’t know why anyone would willingly choose this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just imagine him having sex with his wife. Legs over her head, doggy style snd the two of them falling asleep cradled in each other’s arms while he tells her how much he loves her and she’s the best thing that ever happened to him, stroking her cheek gently..

Imagine them at dinner earlier tonight, dressed to the nines, both turning heads as they walked in, feeding each other bites of their Michelin star plates. They look like movie stars together. You were so far below his level.

He gets up the next morning make her a latte and brings it to her in bed as he crawls back under the covers and puts his mouth between her legs.

Yeah you were a midlife bang that he hates himself for, almost losing everything he truly cared about. She never betrayed him and is too classy to ever be somebody’s side piece, a dirty nasty liar he could never trust. He has too much respect for her and never felt he was good enough.

You are delusional and aren’t close to the woman she is. You don’t know his mother’s name, his first love or what he is truly afraid of. Do you know the name of his best friend and how he died at 29? His deepest fears? The name of his childhood pet or the failure he felt when he couldn’t help his dad get off the bottle?

He didn’t confess any truths to you. You were somebody he needed to escape himself when he felt like sh@t and thought he wasn’t worthy. Thankfully he woke up, ended it and is making up for it every single day.

You are still delusional, living a lie and insecure.

Damn, this is a crazy imagination.

I cheated on my wife, and while I wasn't completely miserable in my marriage, it was nothing like this. I suspect if men had this reality with their wives, the infidelity rate would be very low. Men cheat mostly because they are sexually neglected.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just imagine him having sex with his wife. Legs over her head, doggy style snd the two of them falling asleep cradled in each other’s arms while he tells her how much he loves her and she’s the best thing that ever happened to him, stroking her cheek gently..

Imagine them at dinner earlier tonight, dressed to the nines, both turning heads as they walked in, feeding each other bites of their Michelin star plates. They look like movie stars together. You were so far below his level.

He gets up the next morning make her a latte and brings it to her in bed as he crawls back under the covers and puts his mouth between her legs.

Yeah you were a midlife bang that he hates himself for, almost losing everything he truly cared about. She never betrayed him and is too classy to ever be somebody’s side piece, a dirty nasty liar he could never trust. He has too much respect for her and never felt he was good enough.

You are delusional and aren’t close to the woman she is. You don’t know his mother’s name, his first love or what he is truly afraid of. Do you know the name of his best friend and how he died at 29? His deepest fears? The name of his childhood pet or the failure he felt when he couldn’t help his dad get off the bottle?

He didn’t confess any truths to you. You were somebody he needed to escape himself when he felt like sh@t and thought he wasn’t worthy. Thankfully he woke up, ended it and is making up for it every single day.

You are still delusional, living a lie and insecure.

Damn, this is a crazy imagination.

I cheated on my wife, and while I wasn't completely miserable in my marriage, it was nothing like this. I suspect if men had this reality with their wives, the infidelity rate would be very low. Men cheat mostly because they are sexually neglected.

Try again. Men cheat mostly because...

Use research to answer this time.

[Anonymous]

And before you say "then you should've divorced if you didn't feel loved and respected", I didn't see why I should upend either of our lives when everyone was getting what they wanted. During my affair was probably the happiest time in my marriage for both of us because I wasn't harassing him to love me and he was free to immerse himself in golf and computer games. Until several years passed and I realized my initial lust for my AP hadn't subsided...

You get that this is the definition of selfish, right? The fact that you can look back on this event after having had time and space to process and still defend yourself without any ownership of how this could have played differently, with acknowledgment of the pain you caused your husband (and maybe kids and your AP’s spouse and kids), shows you are very broken. You admittedly didn’t decide to “upend” things until you knew you had a soft place to land. Nowhere in any of your posts do you ever address your ex’s feelings and the pain you caused him (I doubt he agrees that you loved him like a brother - families don’t usually crap on each other like that). Your complete focus is on you, your feelings, and what you are entitled to. Your current DH should be on the alert because if/when things are not all unicorns and rainbows, you are primed to cheat again.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just imagine him having sex with his wife. Legs over her head, doggy style snd the two of them falling asleep cradled in each other’s arms while he tells her how much he loves her and she’s the best thing that ever happened to him, stroking her cheek gently..

Imagine them at dinner earlier tonight, dressed to the nines, both turning heads as they walked in, feeding each other bites of their Michelin star plates. They look like movie stars together. You were so far below his level.

He gets up the next morning make her a latte and brings it to her in bed as he crawls back under the covers and puts his mouth between her legs.

Yeah you were a midlife bang that he hates himself for, almost losing everything he truly cared about. She never betrayed him and is too classy to ever be somebody’s side piece, a dirty nasty liar he could never trust. He has too much respect for her and never felt he was good enough.

You are delusional and aren’t close to the woman she is. You don’t know his mother’s name, his first love or what he is truly afraid of. Do you know the name of his best friend and how he died at 29? His deepest fears? The name of his childhood pet or the failure he felt when he couldn’t help his dad get off the bottle?

He didn’t confess any truths to you. You were somebody he needed to escape himself when he felt like sh@t and thought he wasn’t worthy. Thankfully he woke up, ended it and is making up for it every single day.

You are still delusional, living a lie and insecure.

Damn, this is a crazy imagination.

I cheated on my wife, and while I wasn't completely miserable in my marriage, it was nothing like this. I suspect if men had this reality with their wives, the infidelity rate would be very low. Men cheat mostly because they are sexually neglected.

Try again. Men cheat mostly because...

Use research to answer this time.

Research says....men cheat because they are not feeling loved or appreciated at home.

Although to be fair, men's love language is overwhelmingly sex. So it's a bit disingenuous to say men cheating has nothing to do with sex, because men feel loved when having sex with their wives.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just imagine him having sex with his wife. Legs over her head, doggy style snd the two of them falling asleep cradled in each other’s arms while he tells her how much he loves her and she’s the best thing that ever happened to him, stroking her cheek gently..

Imagine them at dinner earlier tonight, dressed to the nines, both turning heads as they walked in, feeding each other bites of their Michelin star plates. They look like movie stars together. You were so far below his level.

He gets up the next morning make her a latte and brings it to her in bed as he crawls back under the covers and puts his mouth between her legs.

Yeah you were a midlife bang that he hates himself for, almost losing everything he truly cared about. She never betrayed him and is too classy to ever be somebody’s side piece, a dirty nasty liar he could never trust. He has too much respect for her and never felt he was good enough.

You are delusional and aren’t close to the woman she is. You don’t know his mother’s name, his first love or what he is truly afraid of. Do you know the name of his best friend and how he died at 29? His deepest fears? The name of his childhood pet or the failure he felt when he couldn’t help his dad get off the bottle?

He didn’t confess any truths to you. You were somebody he needed to escape himself when he felt like sh@t and thought he wasn’t worthy. Thankfully he woke up, ended it and is making up for it every single day.

You are still delusional, living a lie and insecure.

Damn, this is a crazy imagination.

I cheated on my wife, and while I wasn't completely miserable in my marriage, it was nothing like this. I suspect if men had this reality with their wives, the infidelity rate would be very low. Men cheat mostly because they are sexually neglected.

Try again. Men cheat mostly because...

Use research to answer this time.

Research says....men cheat because they are not feeling loved or appreciated at home.

Although to be fair, men's love language is overwhelmingly sex. So it's a bit disingenuous to say men cheating has nothing to do with sex, because men feel loved when having sex with their wives.

Huh yet you cite zero sources and add your subjective opinion. According to Scientific American journal, “An analysis revealed eight key reasons: anger, self-esteem, lack of love, low commitment, need for variety, neglect, sexual desire, and situation or circumstance.”

Truth is -there is a variety of reasons and plenty of men cheat who also fulfilled sexually at home because they are cake eaters and need the validation because they have low self esteem. Take note that PP did not say it had nothing to do with sex, rather research backs up that’s not the sole reason for cheating.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just imagine him having sex with his wife. Legs over her head, doggy style snd the two of them falling asleep cradled in each other’s arms while he tells her how much he loves her and she’s the best thing that ever happened to him, stroking her cheek gently..

Imagine them at dinner earlier tonight, dressed to the nines, both turning heads as they walked in, feeding each other bites of their Michelin star plates. They look like movie stars together. You were so far below his level.

He gets up the next morning make her a latte and brings it to her in bed as he crawls back under the covers and puts his mouth between her legs.

Yeah you were a midlife bang that he hates himself for, almost losing everything he truly cared about. She never betrayed him and is too classy to ever be somebody’s side piece, a dirty nasty liar he could never trust. He has too much respect for her and never felt he was good enough.

You are delusional and aren’t close to the woman she is. You don’t know his mother’s name, his first love or what he is truly afraid of. Do you know the name of his best friend and how he died at 29? His deepest fears? The name of his childhood pet or the failure he felt when he couldn’t help his dad get off the bottle?

He didn’t confess any truths to you. You were somebody he needed to escape himself when he felt like sh@t and thought he wasn’t worthy. Thankfully he woke up, ended it and is making up for it every single day.

You are still delusional, living a lie and insecure.

Damn, this is a crazy imagination.

I cheated on my wife, and while I wasn't completely miserable in my marriage, it was nothing like this. I suspect if men had this reality with their wives, the infidelity rate would be very low. Men cheat mostly because they are sexually neglected.

Try again. Men cheat mostly because...

Use research to answer this time.

Research says....men cheat because they are not feeling loved or appreciated at home.

Although to be fair, men's love language is overwhelmingly sex. So it's a bit disingenuous to say men cheating has nothing to do with sex, because men feel loved when having sex with their wives.

Based on highly reliable research of reading this board for several months, I think there’s three general camps. Cheater group A who do it for thrills, because they feel entitled, etc. Cheater group B who do it for revenge, to settle some score etc. in response to issues with their spouse. And Cheater group C, which is probably the minority, who do it to feel better about themselves and might actually have feelings for the AP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just imagine him having sex with his wife. Legs over her head, doggy style snd the two of them falling asleep cradled in each other’s arms while he tells her how much he loves her and she’s the best thing that ever happened to him, stroking her cheek gently..

Imagine them at dinner earlier tonight, dressed to the nines, both turning heads as they walked in, feeding each other bites of their Michelin star plates. They look like movie stars together. You were so far below his level.

He gets up the next morning make her a latte and brings it to her in bed as he crawls back under the covers and puts his mouth between her legs.

Yeah you were a midlife bang that he hates himself for, almost losing everything he truly cared about. She never betrayed him and is too classy to ever be somebody’s side piece, a dirty nasty liar he could never trust. He has too much respect for her and never felt he was good enough.

You are delusional and aren’t close to the woman she is. You don’t know his mother’s name, his first love or what he is truly afraid of. Do you know the name of his best friend and how he died at 29? His deepest fears? The name of his childhood pet or the failure he felt when he couldn’t help his dad get off the bottle?

He didn’t confess any truths to you. You were somebody he needed to escape himself when he felt like sh@t and thought he wasn’t worthy. Thankfully he woke up, ended it and is making up for it every single day.

You are still delusional, living a lie and insecure.

Damn, this is a crazy imagination.

I cheated on my wife, and while I wasn't completely miserable in my marriage, it was nothing like this. I suspect if men had this reality with their wives, the infidelity rate would be very low. Men cheat mostly because they are sexually neglected.

Try again. Men cheat mostly because...

Use research to answer this time.

Research says....men cheat because they are not feeling loved or appreciated at home.

Although to be fair, men's love language is overwhelmingly sex. So it's a bit disingenuous to say men cheating has nothing to do with sex, because men feel loved when having sex with their wives.

Huh yet you cite zero sources and add your subjective opinion. According to Scientific American journal, “An analysis revealed eight key reasons: anger, self-esteem, lack of love, low commitment, need for variety, neglect, sexual desire, and situation or circumstance.”

Truth is -there is a variety of reasons and plenty of men cheat who also fulfilled sexually at home because they are cake eaters and need the validation because they have low self esteem. Take note that PP did not say it had nothing to do with sex, rather research backs up that’s not the sole reason for cheating.

If men aren't sexually satisfied (for instance, if their spouse declines sex often), they take that rejection to heart, and it can easily translate to feeling "unloved." In fact, men are more likely than women to cheat due to a feeling of insecurity.

https://www.verywellmind.com/why-married-people-cheat-2300656#:~:text=If%20men%20aren%27t%20sexually,to%20fill%20an%20emotional%20void.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't understand all the hate people with APs get on this forum. Look, clearly, they are looking for advice, why jump on them and start saying narcissist?

That being said, OP, are you now willing to leave your marriage? If you are, then divorce, and see what the AP is up to. Otherwise, don't, because you know it will spiral out of control...

Absolutely horrible advice. Stay out of his marriage. If he cut her off then she needs to respect that. There is a reason he hasn't contacted and since he's a dude it's because he used it and is done with it. The thrill is gone.

Yeah she is a really great person :

"I love my spouse and our relationship is better than ever. There are kids involved on both sides."

Yet I want to harm my spouse, some other spouse and two sets of kids, blow up two households. You know, because I love my spouse and our relationship is better than ever.

Such a troll post.

+1

You all fell for the OP troll.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just imagine him having sex with his wife. Legs over her head, doggy style snd the two of them falling asleep cradled in each other’s arms while he tells her how much he loves her and she’s the best thing that ever happened to him, stroking her cheek gently..

Imagine them at dinner earlier tonight, dressed to the nines, both turning heads as they walked in, feeding each other bites of their Michelin star plates. They look like movie stars together. You were so far below his level.

He gets up the next morning make her a latte and brings it to her in bed as he crawls back under the covers and puts his mouth between her legs.

Yeah you were a midlife bang that he hates himself for, almost losing everything he truly cared about. She never betrayed him and is too classy to ever be somebody’s side piece, a dirty nasty liar he could never trust. He has too much respect for her and never felt he was good enough.

You are delusional and aren’t close to the woman she is. You don’t know his mother’s name, his first love or what he is truly afraid of. Do you know the name of his best friend and how he died at 29? His deepest fears? The name of his childhood pet or the failure he felt when he couldn’t help his dad get off the bottle?

He didn’t confess any truths to you. You were somebody he needed to escape himself when he felt like sh@t and thought he wasn’t worthy. Thankfully he woke up, ended it and is making up for it every single day.

You are still delusional, living a lie and insecure.

Damn, this is a crazy imagination.

I cheated on my wife, and while I wasn't completely miserable in my marriage, it was nothing like this. I suspect if men had this reality with their wives, the infidelity rate would be very low. Men cheat mostly because they are sexually neglected.

Try again. Men cheat mostly because...

Use research to answer this time.

Research says....men cheat because they are not feeling loved or appreciated at home.

Although to be fair, men's love language is overwhelmingly sex. So it's a bit disingenuous to say men cheating has nothing to do with sex, because men feel loved when having sex with their wives.

Huh yet you cite zero sources and add your subjective opinion. According to Scientific American journal, “An analysis revealed eight key reasons: anger, self-esteem, lack of love, low commitment, need for variety, neglect, sexual desire, and situation or circumstance.”

Truth is -there is a variety of reasons and plenty of men cheat who also fulfilled sexually at home because they are cake eaters and need the validation because they have low self esteem. Take note that PP did not say it had nothing to do with sex, rather research backs up that’s not the sole reason for cheating.

Their decision to cheat comes from the desire to experience the love and affection they expect to receive from their wife, but has faded over time. After years of enduring those unmet needs, infidelity became a way for them to be doted on while not having to give up a partnership that still means the world to them.
https://www.marieclaire.com.au/why-do-men-cheat

[Anonymous]

With Orsoyla Gaal’s cheating murder in Queens dominating the news, I’m surprised anyone isn’t seriously questioning their lifestyle and the risks the put their family in.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just imagine him having sex with his wife. Legs over her head, doggy style snd the two of them falling asleep cradled in each other’s arms while he tells her how much he loves her and she’s the best thing that ever happened to him, stroking her cheek gently..

Imagine them at dinner earlier tonight, dressed to the nines, both turning heads as they walked in, feeding each other bites of their Michelin star plates. They look like movie stars together. You were so far below his level.

He gets up the next morning make her a latte and brings it to her in bed as he crawls back under the covers and puts his mouth between her legs.

Yeah you were a midlife bang that he hates himself for, almost losing everything he truly cared about. She never betrayed him and is too classy to ever be somebody’s side piece, a dirty nasty liar he could never trust. He has too much respect for her and never felt he was good enough.

You are delusional and aren’t close to the woman she is. You don’t know his mother’s name, his first love or what he is truly afraid of. Do you know the name of his best friend and how he died at 29? His deepest fears? The name of his childhood pet or the failure he felt when he couldn’t help his dad get off the bottle?

He didn’t confess any truths to you. You were somebody he needed to escape himself when he felt like sh@t and thought he wasn’t worthy. Thankfully he woke up, ended it and is making up for it every single day.

You are still delusional, living a lie and insecure.

Damn, this is a crazy imagination.

I cheated on my wife, and while I wasn't completely miserable in my marriage, it was nothing like this. I suspect if men had this reality with their wives, the infidelity rate would be very low. Men cheat mostly because they are sexually neglected.

Try again. Men cheat mostly because...

Use research to answer this time.

Research says....men cheat because they are not feeling loved or appreciated at home.

Although to be fair, men's love language is overwhelmingly sex. So it's a bit disingenuous to say men cheating has nothing to do with sex, because men feel loved when having sex with their wives.

Huh yet you cite zero sources and add your subjective opinion. According to Scientific American journal, “An analysis revealed eight key reasons: anger, self-esteem, lack of love, low commitment, need for variety, neglect, sexual desire, and situation or circumstance.”

Truth is -there is a variety of reasons and plenty of men cheat who also fulfilled sexually at home because they are cake eaters and need the validation because they have low self esteem. Take note that PP did not say it had nothing to do with sex, rather research backs up that’s not the sole reason for cheating.

Their decision to cheat comes from the desire to experience the love and affection they expect to receive from their wife, but has faded over time. After years of enduring those unmet needs, infidelity became a way for them to be doted on while not having to give up a partnership that still means the world to them.
https://www.marieclaire.com.au/why-do-men-cheat

Those are just the first two articles in a Google search. They all connect men feeling unloved, or not appreciated with the underlying reason being sex at home fading over time.

I am not excusing male behavior or saying there aren't men who have amazing sex at home at still cheat for variety. Your view that it never has to do with sex is hard to square with everything out there

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just imagine him having sex with his wife. Legs over her head, doggy style snd the two of them falling asleep cradled in each other’s arms while he tells her how much he loves her and she’s the best thing that ever happened to him, stroking her cheek gently..

Imagine them at dinner earlier tonight, dressed to the nines, both turning heads as they walked in, feeding each other bites of their Michelin star plates. They look like movie stars together. You were so far below his level.

He gets up the next morning make her a latte and brings it to her in bed as he crawls back under the covers and puts his mouth between her legs.

Yeah you were a midlife bang that he hates himself for, almost losing everything he truly cared about. She never betrayed him and is too classy to ever be somebody’s side piece, a dirty nasty liar he could never trust. He has too much respect for her and never felt he was good enough.

You are delusional and aren’t close to the woman she is. You don’t know his mother’s name, his first love or what he is truly afraid of. Do you know the name of his best friend and how he died at 29? His deepest fears? The name of his childhood pet or the failure he felt when he couldn’t help his dad get off the bottle?

He didn’t confess any truths to you. You were somebody he needed to escape himself when he felt like sh@t and thought he wasn’t worthy. Thankfully he woke up, ended it and is making up for it every single day.

You are still delusional, living a lie and insecure.

Damn, this is a crazy imagination.

I cheated on my wife, and while I wasn't completely miserable in my marriage, it was nothing like this. I suspect if men had this reality with their wives, the infidelity rate would be very low. Men cheat mostly because they are sexually neglected.

Try again. Men cheat mostly because...

Use research to answer this time.

Research says....men cheat because they are not feeling loved or appreciated at home.

Although to be fair, men's love language is overwhelmingly sex. So it's a bit disingenuous to say men cheating has nothing to do with sex, because men feel loved when having sex with their wives.

Huh yet you cite zero sources and add your subjective opinion. According to Scientific American journal, “An analysis revealed eight key reasons: anger, self-esteem, lack of love, low commitment, need for variety, neglect, sexual desire, and situation or circumstance.”

Truth is -there is a variety of reasons and plenty of men cheat who also fulfilled sexually at home because they are cake eaters and need the validation because they have low self esteem. Take note that PP did not say it had nothing to do with sex, rather research backs up that’s not the sole reason for cheating.

Their decision to cheat comes from the desire to experience the love and affection they expect to receive from their wife, but has faded over time. After years of enduring those unmet needs, infidelity became a way for them to be doted on while not having to give up a partnership that still means the world to them.
https://www.marieclaire.com.au/why-do-men-cheat

A lot of guys are just entitled players. Period. They get long in the tooth in middle age and need to feel like they are the sh@t again. Their wives are often hot and sexy and what they bang leaves many scratching their heads.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:With Orsoyla Gaal’s cheating murder in Queens dominating the news, I’m surprised anyone isn’t seriously questioning their lifestyle and the risks the put their family in.

This was your typical online cheater. She had 3 men in her phone from dating apps when she got rid of her handyman. Mentally ill. Willing to take all kinds of risks, willing letting the guy into her home at 1am with her kid sleeping upstairs. On and off again for 2 years right under her husbands nose. Sex in the family home. Ugh.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just imagine him having sex with his wife. Legs over her head, doggy style snd the two of them falling asleep cradled in each other’s arms while he tells her how much he loves her and she’s the best thing that ever happened to him, stroking her cheek gently..

Imagine them at dinner earlier tonight, dressed to the nines, both turning heads as they walked in, feeding each other bites of their Michelin star plates. They look like movie stars together. You were so far below his level.

He gets up the next morning make her a latte and brings it to her in bed as he crawls back under the covers and puts his mouth between her legs.

Yeah you were a midlife bang that he hates himself for, almost losing everything he truly cared about. She never betrayed him and is too classy to ever be somebody’s side piece, a dirty nasty liar he could never trust. He has too much respect for her and never felt he was good enough.

You are delusional and aren’t close to the woman she is. You don’t know his mother’s name, his first love or what he is truly afraid of. Do you know the name of his best friend and how he died at 29? His deepest fears? The name of his childhood pet or the failure he felt when he couldn’t help his dad get off the bottle?

He didn’t confess any truths to you. You were somebody he needed to escape himself when he felt like sh@t and thought he wasn’t worthy. Thankfully he woke up, ended it and is making up for it every single day.

You are still delusional, living a lie and insecure.

Damn, this is a crazy imagination.

I cheated on my wife, and while I wasn't completely miserable in my marriage, it was nothing like this. I suspect if men had this reality with their wives, the infidelity rate would be very low. Men cheat mostly because they are sexually neglected.

Try again. Men cheat mostly because...

Use research to answer this time.

Research says....men cheat because they are not feeling loved or appreciated at home.

Although to be fair, men's love language is overwhelmingly sex. So it's a bit disingenuous to say men cheating has nothing to do with sex, because men feel loved when having sex with their wives.

Huh yet you cite zero sources and add your subjective opinion. According to Scientific American journal, “An analysis revealed eight key reasons: anger, self-esteem, lack of love, low commitment, need for variety, neglect, sexual desire, and situation or circumstance.”

Truth is -there is a variety of reasons and plenty of men cheat who also fulfilled sexually at home because they are cake eaters and need the validation because they have low self esteem. Take note that PP did not say it had nothing to do with sex, rather research backs up that’s not the sole reason for cheating.

Their decision to cheat comes from the desire to experience the love and affection they expect to receive from their wife, but has faded over time. After years of enduring those unmet needs, infidelity became a way for them to be doted on while not having to give up a partnership that still means the world to them.
https://www.marieclaire.com.au/why-do-men-cheat

A lot of guys are just entitled players. Period. They get long in the tooth in middle age and need to feel like they are the sh@t again. Their wives are often hot and sexy and what they bang leaves many scratching their heads.

Point being there are many, many reasons unique to men and women.