Surrogate without a medical reason?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You’re 44, you have a child. Move on.

Jeeze, that's kind and helpful.

It's not bad advice. She's tried for 8 years. She's exhausted all options except the most extreme. She's would be 45 at the earliest when this child is born - and the journey towards that point would be expensive, emotional, fraught with uncertainty, and a legal minefield. Why spend more of her DC's fleeting childhood trying to get another child? Sometimes people just need to give themselves permission to move on.

OP does not need your permission either. If AMA sets you off, this board is probably not for you. Perhaps it is you who should move on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I gave birth at 45 to a baby conceived by donor egg as well as having several other children conceived without medical intervention in my mid to late 30s.

The pregnancy at 44-45 was no problem.

Dealing with a teenager in my late 50's is the only part that has been really hard.

Did I write this? Same exactly for me.

[Anonymous]

Surrogacy is gross. There’s a reason most developed nations have outlawed it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I gave birth at 45 to a baby conceived by donor egg as well as having several other children conceived without medical intervention in my mid to late 30s.

The pregnancy at 44-45 was no problem.

Dealing with a teenager in my late 50's is the only part that has been really hard.

Why? You’re not an old lady

By the time my mom was in her late 50s I had 3 kids and people on DCUM will tell you I shouldn’t expect her to babysit in her advanced age lol

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't understand why women think its okay to put other women through this when its not an absolute necessary. You do realize most surrogates are from economically weaker section of society, right? This is not surrogacy, its rent-a-womb. When did this become a norm, to just willy-nilly rent-a-womb?

Yeah, you'd rather those "economically weaker" women instead get themselves a second or third service job so you can get your french fries and manicures more easily, wouldn't you? Talk about gross. Women of any economic background are sentient beings who can make their own choices about what to do with their bodies without your patronizing input and control, thanks.

Surrogacy is the only job some women can do, for example a woman with childcare obligations and/or a woman who simply chooses not to have smb else raise her kids.

You have literally described surrogacy.

[Anonymous]

Surrogates aren't necessarily low-income women. My GC, whom I found through an agency, was a middle-class college-educated professional married to another middle-class college-educated professional. They owned a home, had stable jobs plus had turned their hobbies into side hustles, etc. Good agencies have both GCs and intended parents write profiles, and the GCs are the ones who pick which IPs they want to work with. My GC had enjoyed being pregnant, didn't want to have more kids, and wanted to help out another couple. (I think she was originally hoping to choose.a pair of gay men, but ended up picking us instead.) We had a lovely relationship through the pregnancy and have remained in touch and friendly years later. (She lives in another part of the country but we meet up when they take the occasional DC vacation or when we're passing through their state on a vacation.)

Just a gentle reminder that the GC relationship is not as simple as rent-a-womb. Our relationship with our GC (and between our families) made us feel like we shared more of the pregnancy and birthing experience, and the memory books she kept for us are very much treasured.