Navigating post-second date

[Anonymous]

He is a total asshole. Don't waste any more time on this guy, seriously. Focus on the other one.

[Anonymous]

So OP the question is if the guy not taking the lead is a deal breaker for you. If it is, you need to move on. If it is something you prefer, but could live with a guy not taking the lead if his other traits compensate for his not doing this, you should ask him out.

Lol, no.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

He sent a text this afternoon that said, "How does Wednesday work for some role playing?" I replied that Wednesday is great.

Did he leave you hanging again?! He's not in a rush, huh...

This feel like him deciding if he should give you his time or not; and like you have all the time available for him (whole Wednesday).
It should be vice versa, at least in the beginning.

OP: haha yes- he left me hanging again! After I replied that Wednesday is great, he didn't respond. Still waiting to hear whether this will be a "real" date, or more of an invitation to hook up.

The weird thing is that he came on strong during our two dates in person, telling me I'm an amazing woman, and the "real deal". So not sure how to interpret the slow action.

Well. You were stressed enough to make a post about it.
Sorry, OP. It sounds like he's a player. He probably says that to all his dates. Other pp's had good insight that he's keeping a lot of women in rotation and you're not a priority. A guy who's really into you would have quickly scheduled a date the multiple times you've provided your availability. You sound like a nice, honest person, and you can do better.

OP: Thank you! I'm actually not too stressed because I've gone on 4 dates with another guy who I really like. I'm just kind of waiting to see what, if anything, happens with this other guy.

So glad there's someone else and already 4 dates, wow. This is what happens when there is a natural flow and when a guy is interested!

It's Wednesday and the first guy still haven't set up a date...what a clown.

[Anonymous]

It’s entertaining to see what he does but I hope you’ve written him off.

[Anonymous]

OP: update. Our last interaction on Monday was:
Him- how’s Wednesday look for some role play?
Me: I think Wednesday would work well

Silence.
Just now, (Wednesday morning), he texted, “how’s your day looking?”

How would you respond?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP: update. Our last interaction on Monday was:
Him- how’s Wednesday look for some role play?
Me: I think Wednesday would work well

Silence.
Just now, (Wednesday morning), he texted, “how’s your day looking?”

How would you respond?

You should indicate that you already made plans. He is attempting a booty call. Sorry OP. Move on. This guy will never be what you want.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP: update. Our last interaction on Monday was:
Him- how’s Wednesday look for some role play?
Me: I think Wednesday would work well

Silence.
Just now, (Wednesday morning), he texted, “how’s your day looking?”

How would you respond?

You should indicate that you already made plans. He is attempting a booty call. Sorry OP. Move on. This guy will never be what you want.

This.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP: update. Our last interaction on Monday was:
Him- how’s Wednesday look for some role play?
Me: I think Wednesday would work well

Silence.
Just now, (Wednesday morning), he texted, “how’s your day looking?”

How would you respond?

You should indicate that you already made plans. He is attempting a booty call. Sorry OP. Move on. This guy will never be what you want.

OP: I replied that I would like to see him but already made plans. He replied, “Oh. I thought we’d agreed already.”

[Anonymous]

Op, I’ve asked you twice about his response after you told him you were free last Thursday and you haven’t provided the info. So I don’t know wether you’re creating stories in your head or if he’s the problem.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op, I’ve asked you twice about his response after you told him you were free last Thursday and you haven’t provided the info. So I don’t know wether you’re creating stories in your head or if he’s the problem.

OP: Sorry- thought I responded! This was an in-person conversation on the second date, and after he asked my schedule and I told him, he didn't say anything. He didn't ask me out on a date right then, and I thought he was going to via text, but then a week went by before he asked (if you consider this asking).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op, I’ve asked you twice about his response after you told him you were free last Thursday and you haven’t provided the info. So I don’t know wether you’re creating stories in your head or if he’s the problem.

OP: Sorry- thought I responded! This was an in-person conversation on the second date, and after he asked my schedule and I told him, he didn't say anything. He didn't ask me out on a date right then, and I thought he was going to via text, but then a week went by before he asked (if you consider this asking).

OP: Just to add, the other guy I've gone out with 4 times, always says, "I hope to see you again" at the end of the date, and then asks me out on a proper date (e.g., dinner) the next day. So I guess that's what I was expecting. Not sure if that's common, or rare?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op, I’ve asked you twice about his response after you told him you were free last Thursday and you haven’t provided the info. So I don’t know wether you’re creating stories in your head or if he’s the problem.

OP: Sorry- thought I responded! This was an in-person conversation on the second date, and after he asked my schedule and I told him, he didn't say anything. He didn't ask me out on a date right then, and I thought he was going to via text, but then a week went by before he asked (if you consider this asking).

OP: Just to add, the other guy I've gone out with 4 times, always says, "I hope to see you again" at the end of the date, and then asks me out on a proper date (e.g., dinner) the next day. So I guess that's what I was expecting. Not sure if that's common, or rare?

Whether it's common or rare this is the right way. Pursue this one the first guy is a loser who will never put the effort in that you deserve. Pleas trust us on this one! There is nothing you can do to make him better. He is beneath you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op, I’ve asked you twice about his response after you told him you were free last Thursday and you haven’t provided the info. So I don’t know wether you’re creating stories in your head or if he’s the problem.

OP: Sorry- thought I responded! This was an in-person conversation on the second date, and after he asked my schedule and I told him, he didn't say anything. He didn't ask me out on a date right then, and I thought he was going to via text, but then a week went by before he asked (if you consider this asking).

OP: Just to add, the other guy I've gone out with 4 times, always says, "I hope to see you again" at the end of the date, and then asks me out on a proper date (e.g., dinner) the next day. So I guess that's what I was expecting. Not sure if that's common, or rare?

It’s the way it should be done. The “other guy” is expressing his interest and following it up with action on his part. Sounds like a good guy but, the question is, are you attracted to him or the non-responsive guy more?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op, I’ve asked you twice about his response after you told him you were free last Thursday and you haven’t provided the info. So I don’t know wether you’re creating stories in your head or if he’s the problem.

OP: Sorry- thought I responded! This was an in-person conversation on the second date, and after he asked my schedule and I told him, he didn't say anything. He didn't ask me out on a date right then, and I thought he was going to via text, but then a week went by before he asked (if you consider this asking).

OP: Just to add, the other guy I've gone out with 4 times, always says, "I hope to see you again" at the end of the date, and then asks me out on a proper date (e.g., dinner) the next day. So I guess that's what I was expecting. Not sure if that's common, or rare?

It’s the way it should be done. The “other guy” is expressing his interest and following it up with action on his part. Sounds like a good guy but, the question is, are you attracted to him or the non-responsive guy more?

OP: I'm definitely attracted to the good guy vs. the non-responsive guy. The non-responsive guy intrigued me because I've been wanting to try dating an older guy (he's 8 years older), just to see what it was like.

[Anonymous]

P.L.A.Y.A