Women who aren't white: How do you define elegance?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP asked for women of color to post, but then a bunch of middle aged white women got all offended and tried to tell the women of color who actually posted that we are wrong (whatever, ladies, we're used to your condescending rudeness and we know you're just jealous and insecure). And once again got two completely different Indian women confused (probably the same woman who on a different thread said she got Priyanka Chopra and Padma Lakshmi mixed up all the time).

What’s your evidence? I’m not even sure of the demographics of any beauty thread on DCUM, but I question the ubiquity of white women assumption.

[Anonymous]

I think its weird that people keep assuming that the pigmentation of my skin dictates my views. Over it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:I agree that it is very odd that you live in McLean and don't know other brown women. We are everywhere!

Anyway, in terms of what I strive for, definitely not the washed out, neutral colored, boring look of middle aged white women. I go for my mom, who still wears bright colors and bright lipstick and has a big personality.

Oh yeah, and all the gold.

Sounds fun but not elegant. Elegant would probably be too boring for your mom and that’s okay.

OP asked for definitions of elegant - your version of elegant and mine sound very different and that's okay, too.

You are entitled to your own definition of elegant. But your definition of elegant sounds very Eurocentric, when is the opposite of what the OP is looking for.

Um, what? I wrote the bolded things and I'm not sure why you think my description of my Indian mom who wears bright colors and gold jewelry is Eurocentric, but okay....

The comment that stated your mother’s look sounds fun, but is not elegant, is the Eurocentric comment to which I referred.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:NP. This is a fascinating thread. I am Pakistani American and live in Bethesda. My White friends think I dress elegantly. The desi fashionistas in Bethesda think I am boring and not trendy! I get that Bethesda has a nerdier vibe than McLean but looking elegant is not hard and the women in my family (including my in-laws) are all considered “put-together.” This seems more like OP is transitioning from one social class to the next. Her curiosity does not deserve snarky responses.

OP, have you been back to Pakistan recently? Women there are far better dressed then we are here. You should start following the magazines on Instagram. They are so on trend they are the point of being shallow there! They also know how to pair Eastern looks with Western. The same can be said for my friends in India. Additionally, people from South Asia know their textiles. The weights of different types of silks, voiles, lawns, wools. South Asians also know a lot more about tailoring since many items are bespoke. I really wish I knew you in real life so I could help you and give you confidence and maybe take you shopping.

OP here. No I haven't been to Pakistan in over 20 years and do not know many desis here since I married a white guy.

[Anonymous]

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:First I would determine your skin tone palette. It might be shocking for many, but not all brown have the same skin tone similar to White people. Some are more warm some are cool.
Then dress according to your skin tone. I don’t see anything wrong with preppy style for people of color, in fact there are a lot of preppy colors that compliment people of color.
Your heritage should not define your chosen style. Look at Amal Cloony, she is impeccable.

Amal is not very stylish, especially as she lives up the road from Milano of all places.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:NP. This is a fascinating thread. I am Pakistani American and live in Bethesda. My White friends think I dress elegantly. The desi fashionistas in Bethesda think I am boring and not trendy! I get that Bethesda has a nerdier vibe than McLean but looking elegant is not hard and the women in my family (including my in-laws) are all considered “put-together.” This seems more like OP is transitioning from one social class to the next. Her curiosity does not deserve snarky responses.

OP, have you been back to Pakistan recently? Women there are far better dressed then we are here. You should start following the magazines on Instagram. They are so on trend they are the point of being shallow there! They also know how to pair Eastern looks with Western. The same can be said for my friends in India. Additionally, people from South Asia know their textiles. The weights of different types of silks, voiles, lawns, wools. South Asians also know a lot more about tailoring since many items are bespoke. I really wish I knew you in real life so I could help you and give you confidence and maybe take you shopping.

OP here. No I haven't been to Pakistan in over 20 years and do not know many desis here since I married a white guy.

Chal Jhooti!