What if the "best fit" is a mediocre school?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, it depends on what you mean by “mediocre”.

If your DC’s preference is any one of these:

SFS
GDS
STA
NCS
Holton
SAAS
Potomac
Madeira
Episcopal
Maret
Landon
WIS
G’town Prep
Bullis
Stone Ridge
SSSAS
Flint Hill
SAES
Gonzaga
Visi
Good Counsel
SJC

Then none of them is truly mediocre. Do some have more average students than others, yes, of course. But they are all really good schools. There are others that I’m not thinking of that are also probably in that category, I’m just less familiar with them.

Can throw SSSA in there too

It was in there. SSSAS. Right above Flint Hill

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I went to a mediocre university and, because I was comfortable, I did extremely well. Then went to a top grad school.

This, you can sometimes shine as the big fish in a small pond.

I think this is more true of college, however. HS students really want to fit in with their peers so I think it is more important to be in the mix of others who have the same focus and capabilities in HS.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My DS has applied to four schools for 9th. He has excellent stats, sports, recommendations, etc. Everyone seems pretty confident he will get into most/all schools.

The thing is that he fell in love with the most mediocre school of the bunch and would definitely choose that over others. Now, DH and I are now questioning whether it's worth it to go to a less prestigious private school vs. our excellent local public.

Will the experience be that great? Will it help with college admissions (or hurt)?

We were willing to shell out a lot of money for a prestigious school, but not sure if it's worth it for a lower tier.

Thoughts?

OP, you're asking for thoughts and mine might run counter to what you think. But I'll chime in anyway.

I think the two questions you're asking might be mutually exclusive, *and* you also have to think about what "helping" with college admissions means. If you only mean helping as in getting into HYP/etc, who knows, and you should probably stick with public+SAT tutoring+summer programs+college guidance.

BUT if you're looking for a great experience (assuming your kid loves the place) with a college process that is helpful by sure the kid gets into schools they will thrive at, regardless of name recognition, then that is where the DMV privates (mediocre and not!) thrive. I think you should pick a private because you think it will give your DS the next best four years of his life, not because he will have a rough four years with a chance of a leg up for the next four. Let the next quarter(ish) of his life be something that he loves, where you can set yourself up to have a strong relationship with him once he leaves the house.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My DS has applied to four schools for 9th. He has excellent stats, sports, recommendations, etc. Everyone seems pretty confident he will get into most/all schools.

The thing is that he fell in love with the most mediocre school of the bunch and would definitely choose that over others. Now, DH and I are now questioning whether it's worth it to go to a less prestigious private school vs. our excellent local public.

Will the experience be that great? Will it help with college admissions (or hurt)?

We were willing to shell out a lot of money for a prestigious school, but not sure if it's worth it for a lower tier.

Thoughts?

Trust your kid for many reasons.

1. Happiness and feeling safe to be true self matters so much to academic performance.
2. Your DC will shine brighter and be higher ranked for college apps
3. Many of the less prestigious privates in our area have excellent teachers and programs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, it depends on what you mean by “mediocre”.

If your DC’s preference is any one of these:

SFS
GDS
STA
NCS
Holton
SAAS
Potomac
Madeira
Episcopal
Maret
Landon
WIS
G’town Prep
Bullis
Stone Ridge
SSSAS
Flint Hill
SAES
Gonzaga
Visi
Good Counsel
SJC

Then none of them is truly mediocre. Do some have more average students than others, yes, of course. But they are all really good schools. There are others that I’m not thinking of that are also probably in that category, I’m just less familiar with them.

Bishop Ireton?

OP described the school as warm. Probably not BI. That said, all of these, and BI, are perfectly fine schools that will have your kid well prepared. The way top schools are now treating admissions, graduating from any private or even a well off public is no advantage. Privates can offer the advantage of great college counseling at no (additional) cost.

[Anonymous]

I think this year has been challenging for admissions as some schools have been more accessible than others. Kids may lean towards schools they have gotten to know better. I’d wait to see where he gets in and then schedule a visiting day at each school, and have him make a final decision after he’s spent a day at each school. It may help to create a spread sheet comparing what is important to you all for each school to try to focus on the big stuff. Also, look at the course offerings and to make sure what you think he’d want to take is offered and accessible (honors or APs specifically in your child’s areas of interest? Certain electives?).
I am of the opinion that most kids can be successful at many different schools—having the student buy-in goes a long way to having success.

[Anonymous]

I attended an extremely "mediocre" college, then went to an Ivy for grad school, and did very well in multiple professions over the years. I love what I do for a living.
I have children in both public and private Montgomery County schools. They are all different, and all thriving.
Each child is unique, and no school predicts their outcomes in life. There's no such thing as a mediocre school. Don't lose sight of the big picture.

[Anonymous]

Pleased to see surprisingly consistent responses on this thread to OP's question, and I will add my vote to the majority. Most DC privates discussed above have been said to be way above the quality of most day privates in the country. Go with what feels right and you almost certainly won't go wrong.

Our own experience -- we focused on the biggest name DC privates (both parents having come from publics and knowing little about the private school world). On a rainy, miserable day we decided to go to one last open house years ago at SAES. Both my son and I instantly fell in love and knew it was a great fit, but we had some reservations as it wasn't quite what we envisioned. We took the leap and it was one of the best parental decisions we ever made. He got an outstanding education, had a wonderful time, made lifelong friends, and yes -- later attended and was well prepared for one of the most selective universities in the country. See where you DC gets accepted,and then go with best fit.

[Anonymous]

I haven't seen the admissions letters myself, but I understand that multiple kids in my kid's grade at Burke chose it over Sidwell Friends. Fit matters to some people, even for academically strong students. By the way, there are some hard core Republicans in the Burke community for this reason too. The progressive style of teaching really works well for some kids.

[Anonymous]

Burke, Field, Sandy Spring, St Andrews, and Bullis all would be much better than Big 3 for some students, even some strong students. Also Landon and Holton, for some students. Also some parochial schools.
"Mediocre" doesn't describe them.

Signed,

Big 3 parent and also parent at one of the "lesser" schools that actually was better in many ways

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I went to a mediocre university and, because I was comfortable, I did extremely well. Then went to a top grad school.

This, you can sometimes shine as the big fish in a small pond.

Yup. I’ve actually been told on this board that my undergrad diploma isn’t worth the paper it’s written on! Oh well. I’m happy with my career and my life so who really cares what anyone else thinks?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Personally, I think it's going to be really individual. One of our kids is at a private that markets itself as a non-pressure-cooker school. It's quite mediocre. The behavior is not much better than our public. The faculty is also quite mixed, and we are finding gaps after all the hybrid instruction. Depending on what you are after in a private school, I would do all the investigating you can.

Can you say the name of this school? Or at the very least give a good sense of where it is located so we can try and figure it out?

[Anonymous]

I really wanted my kid to go to private school for HS. He got into our first choice but after attending a shadow day he insisted on going to our local public. We tried our best to convince him but he is a stubborn kid. We decided it should be his decision. He seems very happy at the public school and has a lot of friends. Perhaps it was the right decision for him. I think he has not regretted his decision and appreciates having ownership of it. Perhaps if money is no issue for you, let your child decide

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I really wanted my kid to go to private school for HS. He got into our first choice but after attending a shadow day he insisted on going to our local public. We tried our best to convince him but he is a stubborn kid. We decided it should be his decision. He seems very happy at the public school and has a lot of friends. Perhaps it was the right decision for him. I think he has not regretted his decision and appreciates having ownership of it. Perhaps if money is no issue for you, let your child decide

That’s great! And I think I speak for the majority of us when I say that most us wish him the best.

[Anonymous]

Bumping this thread. OP, would you share with us which school your child chose?