Sharing my recipe - am I being weird about this?

[Anonymous]

So true! Funny!


Wow, OP, I would say some of these posts are from your MIL's friends!

[Anonymous]

OP, It's your MIL. Give her what she wants. Change the recipe if you feel you must.

I have to tell you I have a friend who is a good cook who I know changes her recipes before she gives them out - and it makes me think less of her. Sorry but it's true. What kind of an insecure, selfish person changes a recipe so her FRIENDS cannot enjoy the dish as much as possible? I have another good friend who is a great cook and he always shares his reciped unaltered and I love that about him. And he benefits by the great food I share with his family!

[Anonymous]

Dear god, OP, unless it is a secret family recipe or you need it for a business ("Joe's secret family recipe") then give her the freakin' recipe.

This is your family. It's a RECIPE! Recipes are meant to be shared and enjoyed, not hoarded and lorded over.

[Anonymous]

Chill!!

[Anonymous]

This thread is almost as crazy as the dirty dice thread.

[Anonymous]

Didn't read everyone's post, but I totally understand your frustration. I agree that it would be one thing for her to ask for the recipe 'for her to make'; but she didn't.

She should be submitting her own recipe for her church cookbook, not yours. Some family recipes are cherished. What if your family recipe in the church cookbook gets so popular that in a few years from now you see it on the back of a soup can?

[Anonymous]

OK. I've previously posted that I don't like the idea of her contributing a recipe that she's never even made to a cookbook, but how about you tell her it's called Grandma Patterson's Perfect Pasta Salad (or whatever) and you'd like a copy of the cookbook when they publish it? That might make her accountable to give you/your mother credit for the recipe if she still wants to contribute it.

Or you can make the recipe vague like others have said. I make a dish where I don't measure anything. I use a swirl of soy sauce and a shake of sugar.

Oh and I'm going to guess the Jewish author is Jessica Seinfeld on Oprah. I know there was a big stink about her stealing Sneaky Chef recipes, but you can't copyright a recipe...

[Anonymous]

Good Lord, it isn't like she wants to copy your math homework! It's just food after all, what's the big deal!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I've posted this before, but here it goes again. In my Italian family, cooking is very important. It is the centerpiece of all family gatherings. When my great aunts passed on, they handed out cookbooks at their funerals and included funny stories about cooking together. I hope someone does the same when I die.

But, since we cooked like Italians, no recipe is ever accurate. I prefer to call recipes "suggestions". We cook by color, taste and smell, not measurements and timers. So, good luck following it if you don't cook like us.

If the OP is still concerned, write a rambling recipe without measurements. They will never print it.

Hee hee, so true. As my nana's getting up there, I'm trying to get some of her "recipes," such as they are, down, and it's impossible. My favorite is, "Cook it... you know, 'til it's done." Thanks, Nana, got it.

In my family every thing seems to get cooked at 350 degrees for 30-40 minutes, or until done.

[Anonymous]

eh, change a little here and there and then you can give her recipe2.0!

[Anonymous]

OP, did your MIL say that she would publish it under her name? I have a charity cookbook of donated recipes and I love the little snippets they put in from the authors. I mean how do you know she won't title it "My Dear DIL's Chili". Or, maybe she'll write a note like "everytime my DIL comes over she makes this wonderful dish, which reminds me of family get-togethers."

Even if she doesn't I think you should just talk to her outright, rather than plotting to sabotage recipe or making up passive lies to get out of it like others suggested. I'm really shocked by the responses. I'd be flattered and move on. Why are the majority of respondents super sensitive, it's like a knee-jerk reaction to be peeved. Not a good way to live.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Not sure which 10:52 you are, but I really don't have problems with my MIL. We're not super close, but we get along very well. Like I said, I would be happy to give the recipe to her for her to make - it's just her asking for it just to submit to the church cookbook that has my feathers ruffled. I wouldn't submit it to a cookbook myself and it feels weird to me to have her publicize it when I wouldn't, plus the other factor that others have hit on that it's also a little weird to me to have her submit it as hers when she has never made it. She does cook - it seems to me that she would have plenty of things of her own that she could submit.

Have you already told he that it's not a super special recipe that's been in your family for years? If not, then tell a white lie.

[Anonymous]

who cares if it's been in her family for years? why not still share it?

even booming businesses share their recipes with the public. think of magnolia bakery. they make the 4-3-2-1 recipe that home cooks have done for ages and they've found a way to profit over it. good for them. it doesn't take away from whoever's grandma originally came up with it.

[Anonymous]

I don't think it's weird. Just tell your mil you don't want to share it with strangers because you feel (even if it seems irrational) like it's something you share with your mother.

[Anonymous]

It's not a family recipe--it's not something that OP created or invented--it's not even particularly special or unique, apparently. So really, who cares?
Makes me think that OP is exactly the kind of petty, trite, small DIL I sincerely hope never to be stuck with. How do you know your MIL will pass it off as her own? Why care?

Jeez.