The amount of people living subsidized by their parents is astounding

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The amount of cope in this thread from rich folks refusing to acknowledge that they were given a HUGE head start and continue to receive incredibly and fundamentally unfair advantages is pathetic. (And/or that their kids are receiving a huge head start and unfair advantages.)

Desperate pushback because deep down most of them know they are actually nothing special and wouldn’t have nearly the “success” they currently enjoy if the playing field were level…

Are you reading and comprehending?

Because I alone with several others fee up poor/lmc (my spouse did as well) and yet we managed to make an amazing life for ourselves. We were HNW
(10M) by 35 and UHNW by 50. No held from family, we had student loans and no help. We just chose to take risks and excel at our careers.
Now not everyone can do what we did but many can excel. It's about making opportunities, excelling at college and your jobs and choosing to live within you means and saving

Ironic that you questioned that poster’s reading comprehension while failing to comprehend that they’re clearly talking about children that benefited from rich parents. As an aside, would love to know how you went from student loans to $10 million in just over a decade.

Lived in a basic one bedroom for two years while we paid of almost 6 figures of student loans between two of us. By age 30 one of us was making $100K and the other was making $250K plus bonuses (in the 90s9. Both engineers.

Bought a first house we could easily afford on the $100K salary. So loans were paid off in 2-3 years. Then even after buying the home we lived on one income (the lower one) mainly--had a 15 yo 2k sq ft 4bed, 2.5 bath. Did all cleaning/yard work and minor maintenance ourselves. Brown bagged lunches 9 out of 10 days.
One took a job with a startup and that led to stock options that got us the rest of way.
But that is where choices matter. You have to be willing to take risks for the rewards. They moved quickly up in management and after a few more job changes was CEO in early 40 at company with 2k employees

Yeah, I am also confused the point you are trying to make. I agree with you that it's no excuse that you can't make your own way and shouldn't rely on handouts from parents. It's one thing if you receive them as part of estate planning...vs. needing the handouts to fund a reasonable UMC lifestyle.

So, are you in the camp of "kids need to make their own way", or the camp of "it's fine for kids to live their entire adult lives dependent on parent welfare".

"kids need to make their own way". Our kids are excelling at college (or did). They don't expect handouts and plan to be normal self sufficient adults. However, as long as our kids have good jobs we will continue to supplement their savings for big purchases.
What I mean is that my kid lives a lifestyle they can afford with their job (4 years out of college now), save 98% of what we give them. If they decide to quit their job and sit at home playing video games all day, they won't get much help from us, other than getting the into therapy.
And if my kid decides to sell the perfectly great $35K car we got them and upgrade to a sports car or luxury vehicle, well that will signal that they don't need any more gifts. But that won't happen, because when we suggested looking at slightly "nicer vehicles" the same kid stated they couldn't be a 26yo pulling into work driving a brand new luxury car. They also love their car and don't really see the need for anything more. So they don't want to show off, or waste money.

They know we will fund their weddings if/when they want one. They know we will fund education for the grandkids. So yes, that allows them to lead a bit less stressful life. But they are not living in a $4K/month apartment. They have what many of their colleagues have---if anything they went for "quality in the burbs closer to work" versus "being in the city near the college bars".

So there is a good midpoint that many parents take. It isn't one extreme or the other. As a parent, why wouldn't I want my kid to have a slightly better lifestyle and be able to do the car eer they want (no matter what the pay is) if they are passionate about it? Why wouldn't I provide some of our wealth to them now in their 20s/30s, rather than waiting another 40+ years for us to die? Yes it's a huge advantage but done correctly it doesn't stop the adult kids from striving and pursuing a great career in life.

I think you are confused as to what point you’re trying to make. It sounds like you want to have everybody believe that the perfectly reasonable and appropriate and respectable amount of subsidies fully grown adults accept from their parents is whatever amount YOUR kids accept from YOU.

It’s a very “the only moral abortion is my abortion” way of thinking.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The amount of cope in this thread from rich folks refusing to acknowledge that they were given a HUGE head start and continue to receive incredibly and fundamentally unfair advantages is pathetic. (And/or that their kids are receiving a huge head start and unfair advantages.)

Desperate pushback because deep down most of them know they are actually nothing special and wouldn’t have nearly the “success” they currently enjoy if the playing field were level…

Are you reading and comprehending?

Because I alone with several others fee up poor/lmc (my spouse did as well) and yet we managed to make an amazing life for ourselves. We were HNW
(10M) by 35 and UHNW by 50. No held from family, we had student loans and no help. We just chose to take risks and excel at our careers.
Now not everyone can do what we did but many can excel. It's about making opportunities, excelling at college and your jobs and choosing to live within you means and saving

Ironic that you questioned that poster’s reading comprehension while failing to comprehend that they’re clearly talking about children that benefited from rich parents. As an aside, would love to know how you went from student loans to $10 million in just over a decade.

Lived in a basic one bedroom for two years while we paid of almost 6 figures of student loans between two of us. By age 30 one of us was making $100K and the other was making $250K plus bonuses (in the 90s9. Both engineers.

Bought a first house we could easily afford on the $100K salary. So loans were paid off in 2-3 years. Then even after buying the home we lived on one income (the lower one) mainly--had a 15 yo 2k sq ft 4bed, 2.5 bath. Did all cleaning/yard work and minor maintenance ourselves. Brown bagged lunches 9 out of 10 days.
One took a job with a startup and that led to stock options that got us the rest of way.
But that is where choices matter. You have to be willing to take risks for the rewards. They moved quickly up in management and after a few more job changes was CEO in early 40 at company with 2k employees

Yeah, I am also confused the point you are trying to make. I agree with you that it's no excuse that you can't make your own way and shouldn't rely on handouts from parents. It's one thing if you receive them as part of estate planning...vs. needing the handouts to fund a reasonable UMC lifestyle.

So, are you in the camp of "kids need to make their own way", or the camp of "it's fine for kids to live their entire adult lives dependent on parent welfare".

"kids need to make their own way". Our kids are excelling at college (or did). They don't expect handouts and plan to be normal self sufficient adults. However, as long as our kids have good jobs we will continue to supplement their savings for big purchases.
What I mean is that my kid lives a lifestyle they can afford with their job (4 years out of college now), save 98% of what we give them. If they decide to quit their job and sit at home playing video games all day, they won't get much help from us, other than getting the into therapy.
And if my kid decides to sell the perfectly great $35K car we got them and upgrade to a sports car or luxury vehicle, well that will signal that they don't need any more gifts. But that won't happen, because when we suggested looking at slightly "nicer vehicles" the same kid stated they couldn't be a 26yo pulling into work driving a brand new luxury car. They also love their car and don't really see the need for anything more. So they don't want to show off, or waste money.

They know we will fund their weddings if/when they want one. They know we will fund education for the grandkids. So yes, that allows them to lead a bit less stressful life. But they are not living in a $4K/month apartment. They have what many of their colleagues have---if anything they went for "quality in the burbs closer to work" versus "being in the city near the college bars".

So there is a good midpoint that many parents take. It isn't one extreme or the other. As a parent, why wouldn't I want my kid to have a slightly better lifestyle and be able to do the car eer they want (no matter what the pay is) if they are passionate about it? Why wouldn't I provide some of our wealth to them now in their 20s/30s, rather than waiting another 40+ years for us to die? Yes it's a huge advantage but done correctly it doesn't stop the adult kids from striving and pursuing a great career in life.

Lots of people want this. Now there is another young family who can’t have that quality house in the burbs close to their work because your kid outbid them, with the leg up they had from you.

That’s what we mean by saying that resources are finite. Nobody is saying it’s morally wrong to help your kid. We’re just saying your kid has an unfair advantage. It’s wild that you can’t admit that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The amount of cope in this thread from rich folks refusing to acknowledge that they were given a HUGE head start and continue to receive incredibly and fundamentally unfair advantages is pathetic. (And/or that their kids are receiving a huge head start and unfair advantages.)

Desperate pushback because deep down most of them know they are actually nothing special and wouldn’t have nearly the “success” they currently enjoy if the playing field were level…

Are you reading and comprehending?

Because I alone with several others fee up poor/lmc (my spouse did as well) and yet we managed to make an amazing life for ourselves. We were HNW
(10M) by 35 and UHNW by 50. No held from family, we had student loans and no help. We just chose to take risks and excel at our careers.
Now not everyone can do what we did but many can excel. It's about making opportunities, excelling at college and your jobs and choosing to live within you means and saving

Ironic that you questioned that poster’s reading comprehension while failing to comprehend that they’re clearly talking about children that benefited from rich parents. As an aside, would love to know how you went from student loans to $10 million in just over a decade.

Lived in a basic one bedroom for two years while we paid of almost 6 figures of student loans between two of us. By age 30 one of us was making $100K and the other was making $250K plus bonuses (in the 90s9. Both engineers.

Bought a first house we could easily afford on the $100K salary. So loans were paid off in 2-3 years. Then even after buying the home we lived on one income (the lower one) mainly--had a 15 yo 2k sq ft 4bed, 2.5 bath. Did all cleaning/yard work and minor maintenance ourselves. Brown bagged lunches 9 out of 10 days.
One took a job with a startup and that led to stock options that got us the rest of way.
But that is where choices matter. You have to be willing to take risks for the rewards. They moved quickly up in management and after a few more job changes was CEO in early 40 at company with 2k employees

LOL. Like I said, you are clearly bad at math. The bolded didn’t get you “the rest of the way” to 10M by age 35. In your entire life story, it is the only meaningful action you took to obtain that level of wealth.

Good for you for being frugal, but lots of people are similarly frugal and that doesn’t lead to UHNW (which isn’t the goal, this entire conversation is basically beside the point). And good for you that your career risk paid off, but do you understand that that is partially attributable to… luck?

Umm, living frugal when you have a good salary means we had $2-3M in investments/savings by age 30 including retirement. So we were at $5M+ by age 35. If you are saving $140-150K/year easily plus retirement and investing it, you can get there. The key is investing and living below your means. I stated we were able to basically live comfortably on the $100K and save the $250K salary.

Interestingly, we turned down jobs offers with another more established company that had we taken it, we would have been worth $20M+ by 30 (we had 2 different friends who did take those offers so we know the trajectory). This was a tech company with 5-6K employees. Most of the employees got very rich. This is just to show that there are plenty of opportunities out there, you just have to be willing to take the risk

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The amount of cope in this thread from rich folks refusing to acknowledge that they were given a HUGE head start and continue to receive incredibly and fundamentally unfair advantages is pathetic. (And/or that their kids are receiving a huge head start and unfair advantages.)

Desperate pushback because deep down most of them know they are actually nothing special and wouldn’t have nearly the “success” they currently enjoy if the playing field were level…

Are you reading and comprehending?

Because I alone with several others fee up poor/lmc (my spouse did as well) and yet we managed to make an amazing life for ourselves. We were HNW
(10M) by 35 and UHNW by 50. No held from family, we had student loans and no help. We just chose to take risks and excel at our careers.
Now not everyone can do what we did but many can excel. It's about making opportunities, excelling at college and your jobs and choosing to live within you means and saving

Ironic that you questioned that poster’s reading comprehension while failing to comprehend that they’re clearly talking about children that benefited from rich parents. As an aside, would love to know how you went from student loans to $10 million in just over a decade.

Lived in a basic one bedroom for two years while we paid of almost 6 figures of student loans between two of us. By age 30 one of us was making $100K and the other was making $250K plus bonuses (in the 90s9. Both engineers.

Bought a first house we could easily afford on the $100K salary. So loans were paid off in 2-3 years. Then even after buying the home we lived on one income (the lower one) mainly--had a 15 yo 2k sq ft 4bed, 2.5 bath. Did all cleaning/yard work and minor maintenance ourselves. Brown bagged lunches 9 out of 10 days.
One took a job with a startup and that led to stock options that got us the rest of way.
But that is where choices matter. You have to be willing to take risks for the rewards. They moved quickly up in management and after a few more job changes was CEO in early 40 at company with 2k employees

LOL. Like I said, you are clearly bad at math. The bolded didn’t get you “the rest of the way” to 10M by age 35. In your entire life story, it is the only meaningful action you took to obtain that level of wealth.

Good for you for being frugal, but lots of people are similarly frugal and that doesn’t lead to UHNW (which isn’t the goal, this entire conversation is basically beside the point). And good for you that your career risk paid off, but do you understand that that is partially attributable to… luck?

Umm, living frugal when you have a good salary means we had $2-3M in investments/savings by age 30 including retirement. So we were at $5M+ by age 35. If you are saving $140-150K/year easily plus retirement and investing it, you can get there. The key is investing and living below your means. I stated we were able to basically live comfortably on the $100K and save the $250K salary.

Interestingly, we turned down jobs offers with another more established company that had we taken it, we would have been worth $20M+ by 30 (we had 2 different friends who did take those offers so we know the trajectory). This was a tech company with 5-6K employees. Most of the employees got very rich. This is just to show that there are plenty of opportunities out there, you just have to be willing to take the risk

1. You were joining/rejecting start ups during the dot com boom. That’s pure LUCK. You are also arguing from a position of survivor bias, i.e. many people in your shoes took similar risks that did NOT pay off, so obviously they’re not metaphorically puffing their chests on the internet and telling everyone how clever they are.

2. Was it 10M at 35 or 5M at 35? Weird that you have already changed this detail. Doesn’t speak well for your credibility.

3. Those salaries were exceptionally good in the 90’s. Most couples even NOW don’t even EARN 140K + retirement, so obviously they can’t save it. A couple living off “only” 100K 25 years ago isn’t the flex you seem to think it is.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The amount of cope in this thread from rich folks refusing to acknowledge that they were given a HUGE head start and continue to receive incredibly and fundamentally unfair advantages is pathetic. (And/or that their kids are receiving a huge head start and unfair advantages.)

Desperate pushback because deep down most of them know they are actually nothing special and wouldn’t have nearly the “success” they currently enjoy if the playing field were level…

Well, generational wealth is a privilege that you have some control over. We are legal immigrants who came with $200 to US. And in a few decades we are able to give our kids in their 20s - college education, new car, seed money to invest. In their late 20s & early 30s - big fat wedding and down payment to house. Annually - the maximum tax-free gift that we can give.

But, I am surprised that people on this thread do not recognize their own privilege -
- Being from USA or western countries. Your generations and nations became rich by colonizing and sucking the blood of countries in Asia and Africa.
- Being White and Christian. Yes, this is a racist country and I cannot imagine that a White person has anyone but themselves to blame if they cannot do well with all the perks they get for being White. Also, your legal status opens immense doors for you.
- Being able to speak English. There is a huge segment of society that are excluded because they do not know English.
- 50% of the population does well because they are males in a patriarchal society.
- Having access to the technology and training that allows them to be on DCUM. The infrastructure that every American has.

And here are other privileges that most people on DCUM have.
- Having a family, married parents
- Having college education. Having infrastructure for living a good life.
- No food insecurity. No calorie deficit. A country so rich that many people are overweight.

So, as a non-White, non-Christian female immigrant from an Asian country that was colonized and made poor for centuries by White people, with zero support network in this country, being far away from my family and friends, being excluded from the White Boy's club, no parity in salary at work, facing both the glass and bamboo ceiling - If I am able to be successful and can give all the financial leg-ups to my children and grandchildren then - why don't you?

With all the privileges and opportunities , why a huge %age of White people are -
- Not college educated,
- Not rich,
- Not healthy,
- Without family support,
- Lonely and depressed,
- Without generational wealth and unable to create generational wealth,
- Without intact and loving families,
- Unable to do what is needed to help their adult children not have college debt,
- Unable to help their adult children financially or let them stay with them rent-free?

I will not bother addressing the idiotic racist talking points littered throughout this ignorant post, but I will point out that you have missed the point from the jump.

“Well, generational wealth is a privilege that you have some control over.”

No. No child has ANY control over who their parents are. You’re looking at this the POV of the wealthy parents, but we are discussing this from the POV of the kids who did nothing to earn this wealth.

No child has any control over being born. Parents have unprotected sex and a human being gets born in whatever situation they are being born. But in all civilized societies parents care for their children until they become successful on their own. So, yes, children do have a claim on the wealth or resources that their parents have earned.

First of all, the parents need to raise the children well by taking care of their physical, mental, emotional, academic, social wellbeing, and this requires the parents to be self-sacrificing and putting the children first, so that these children become successful adults and parents themselves.

Many American parents are selfish even though they make pretty decent money. They do not save for their kids because it inconveniences them. Then they shrug off every major financial decision that can give a leg up to their children by saying "sink or swim" or "have skin in the game".

In today's economy and climate, young people will not be able to go to college, marry, afford a house, have kids and send them to college etc if the older generation does not share their wealth with their AC. The youngsters are inheriting a terrible Earth and a terrible economy thanks to mismanagement of previous generations - and throwing them out of the house at 16 no longer works.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The amount of cope in this thread from rich folks refusing to acknowledge that they were given a HUGE head start and continue to receive incredibly and fundamentally unfair advantages is pathetic. (And/or that their kids are receiving a huge head start and unfair advantages.)

Desperate pushback because deep down most of them know they are actually nothing special and wouldn’t have nearly the “success” they currently enjoy if the playing field were level…

Well, generational wealth is a privilege that you have some control over. We are legal immigrants who came with $200 to US. And in a few decades we are able to give our kids in their 20s - college education, new car, seed money to invest. In their late 20s & early 30s - big fat wedding and down payment to house. Annually - the maximum tax-free gift that we can give.

But, I am surprised that people on this thread do not recognize their own privilege -
- Being from USA or western countries. Your generations and nations became rich by colonizing and sucking the blood of countries in Asia and Africa.
- Being White and Christian. Yes, this is a racist country and I cannot imagine that a White person has anyone but themselves to blame if they cannot do well with all the perks they get for being White. Also, your legal status opens immense doors for you.
- Being able to speak English. There is a huge segment of society that are excluded because they do not know English.
- 50% of the population does well because they are males in a patriarchal society.
- Having access to the technology and training that allows them to be on DCUM. The infrastructure that every American has.

And here are other privileges that most people on DCUM have.
- Having a family, married parents
- Having college education. Having infrastructure for living a good life.
- No food insecurity. No calorie deficit. A country so rich that many people are overweight.

So, as a non-White, non-Christian female immigrant from an Asian country that was colonized and made poor for centuries by White people, with zero support network in this country, being far away from my family and friends, being excluded from the White Boy's club, no parity in salary at work, facing both the glass and bamboo ceiling - If I am able to be successful and can give all the financial leg-ups to my children and grandchildren then - why don't you?

With all the privileges and opportunities , why a huge %age of White people are -
- Not college educated,
- Not rich,
- Not healthy,
- Without family support,
- Lonely and depressed,
- Without generational wealth and unable to create generational wealth,
- Without intact and loving families,
- Unable to do what is needed to help their adult children not have college debt,
- Unable to help their adult children financially or let them stay with them rent-free?

I will not bother addressing the idiotic racist talking points littered throughout this ignorant post, but I will point out that you have missed the point from the jump.

“Well, generational wealth is a privilege that you have some control over.”

No. No child has ANY control over who their parents are. You’re looking at this the POV of the wealthy parents, but we are discussing this from the POV of the kids who did nothing to earn this wealth.

No child has any control over being born. Parents have unprotected sex and a human being gets born in whatever situation they are being born. But in all civilized societies parents care for their children until they become successful on their own. So, yes, children do have a claim on the wealth or resources that their parents have earned.

First of all, the parents need to raise the children well by taking care of their physical, mental, emotional, academic, social wellbeing, and this requires the parents to be self-sacrificing and putting the children first, so that these children become successful adults and parents themselves.

Many American parents are selfish even though they make pretty decent money. They do not save for their kids because it inconveniences them. Then they shrug off every major financial decision that can give a leg up to their children by saying "sink or swim" or "have skin in the game".

In today's economy and climate, young people will not be able to go to college, marry, afford a house, have kids and send them to college etc if the older generation does not share their wealth with their AC. The youngsters are inheriting a terrible Earth and a terrible economy thanks to mismanagement of previous generations - and throwing them out of the house at 16 no longer works.

None of this drivel addresses the points being made. You appear to be suffering from the logical fallacy that because you are good at one thing (programming I’m guessing) you are good at all things. It is obvious that you are not, and this discussion is over your head.