The amount of people living subsidized by their parents is astounding

[Anonymous]

Dh and I had NO help from family at all after college and very minimal in college. Honestly...I don't want my kids to struggle the way we did. I also think were we to have been young adults now, even with our level of frugality and planning, we would be completely screwed due to the high cost of everything including housing. So we are planning on helping our kids. I am glad we can do it. I think it's different from our generation in the sense that the adult peers we have who have family money had an easier landscape AND help, and that can (not always) lead to a bit of cluelessness and insensitivity and smugness. I see it on here frequently.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm over 50 and have never met anyone like this. What kind of loser would accept money from parents/family? It's not that hard to just get a job and pay your bills in the US, assuming you didn't have kids before finishing college.

Who the hell would turn down money from a trust?

I did. My mom and sister swooped in and took or stole everything. There was some retirement money left to me, not a lot as he wasted it all on girlfriends. I turned it down as long as I never have to see or speak to them again due to their behavior.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:With kids in this area in places like Del Ray and Arl I'm not sure you can make it without help. You people who don't have kids living around here have no idea. Move you say. Well if my parents are willing to help my family happy around here esp because the kids are, I'm gonna accept it.

We all have different crossed to bear in life- the money doesn't make us happier or have more friends or be healthier - but it is a lucky break because we can actually live. You may have something we wish for. In my neighborhood there is no SFH less than $1M. Really less than $1.5M. With kids, it's so much more to shell out do understand that the help is very much needed.

Many people do it. Yes, even in pricey neighborhoods. How tone-deaf are you?

And you don’t have to live in a neighborhood with all 1.5M homes, FYI.

[Anonymous]

Why do people bare where others get their money so long as they didn't commit evil acts to obtain it? Jealousy is never a good thing. It only harms the person harboring that hate

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why does it matter? What is this obsession with how other people get their money?

Stop with the fake superiority that you are somehow better than them. If anything, you are jealous otherwise why would you care?

And I’m fully self-supporting but I sure wouldn’t turn down money if my parents gave it to me. So rock on those of you getting money! Make it work for you.

Because money is interesting. And because I never knew about this until we became new-money Arlington types hanging out with people from this area. It’s a new concept to me. I’m not obsessed and don’t think anyone is better or worse because of it. But come on. It’s fascinating to see behind the curtain. I love the rags to riches stores just as much

[Anonymous]

I live in a fancier neighborhood and am not subsidized by my parents beyond their paying for a public undergrad. It would never occur to me to be mad that my neighbors get help from their parents. I feel lucky for what i have. Different people have different things and that's ok.

[Anonymous]

This is basically my entire neighborhood in Chevy Chase.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's very common in DC. We have a lot of friends who have similar incomes to us (we went to grad school together, work at the same or similar places, similar career trajectories) but they live in much bigger or nicer homes, send their kids to private, and vacation in much nicer, more exotic locations. It's all family money -- parents gifting hundreds of thousands for down payments, paying directly for school tuition, and "hosting" family vacations to the South Pacific, Europe, etc. Because their parents aren't literally paying their bills or mortgage or just giving them money for travel, they don't really think if it as being "supported" by parents. They don't realize how much more they'd need to budget if their parents weren't paying for all this. It's invisible to them.

It’s fairly common everywhere.

The issue isn’t others being financially supported, but the entitlement it often creates, not to mention the eventual resentment when funds run dry.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I guess you could say I am "subsidized" by my parents. They transfer the annual minimum to all kids and grandkids. But I make almost six figures myself each year. What people do not understand is that transferring wealth is the way to protect assets and generational wealth. It is naive to think parents are "subsidizing" the lifestyle of their kids and grandkids. As someone upthread said, for UHNW individuals, they cannot spend the $$ and after they give to charity, the goal is tax minimization. So you lawfully transfer the wealth. IYKYK.

Just because it’s smart wealth planning on the part of your parents doesn’t mean they are not subsidizing your life by giving you tens of thousand a year. You make nearly six figures yourself? That’s financial aid worthy at most private schools.

[Anonymous]

My kid is on her own!!! Just on my medical plan, my netflix, my cell phone plan at 24

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just in the last 2 years we made 1m/year and my parents who make 80k/year on retirement have full medical benefits but have everything fully paid off want to pay for private school and I am ok with it because they don't have any other use for their money. If they end of running out of money i would help them. However their generation is very different than our's where they don't have any debts.

If you're making $2m per year and your letting your retired parents clocking $80k a year in retirement pay for your kids' private school education, you are a f4cking loser. Hope I'm crystal clear.

thanks, my parents have 10m in assets and i have loans and a house that has a mortgage balance of 50%. We are henry millennials that recently started getting this high income. either way sorry we are not all old genx/boomers like yourself. At least my boomer parents want to help.

That's awesome! I feel like your parents must be very satisfied. Not only were they able to save enough to have a comfortable retirement, their child(ren?) were able to get positions that are well paid, and they've done so well that they can support their grandchildren. It's definitely a position many people would love to be in.

[Anonymous]

It's always been like this. Only for a short time after the was when the rest of the world was in tatters and American manufacturing was going up and up was it possible for a nuclear family unit to really make it on their own on one or two salaries. The Amish raise barns and help plow fields for their families. Other places, parents and grandparents and unmarried aunts look after children and people bring into in the money from working outside the home share it with everyone. Multigenerational living is very common in places without a social safety net and welfare and housing/health subsidies. It's just more obvious in the UMC world now as we have all been sold this Lutheran work ethic of do it on your own and bootstraps or whatever. When it's not how anyone really did it. Especially the wealthy who always worried about passing on generational wealth.

[Anonymous]

Op, if you are an American, did your family grow wealth? How and where is it?
My great grandparents, grandparents, and parents all would have been rich if the money hadn't been taken from them in the old country.
All were extremely frugal, worked several jobs, but home ownership, owning a business, or stock market didn't exits. Any excess wealth they created, belong to the state.
I came to US, worked here minimum wage jobs for 10 year not being able to invest, buy property or go to school. The minute I got my green card, I invested myself into financial freedom.
My kids know we are finally building generational wealth and they are on board. They also know why my side of the family didn't do it before. They know why their American side didn't do it even though it was an option for them.
I'm more excited to finally build it than I am to use it. Wealth is also being happy with less and not care what others have.
Three generations lost their money to state. I won't hopefully. How's that not a good deal already.

[Anonymous]

We plan on offering DCs financial support in their adult lives. It's all going to be their one day, anyway---why not share it sooner rather than later?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We plan on offering DCs financial support in their adult lives. It's all going to be their one day, anyway---why not share it sooner rather than later?

To be honest, this is our plan too but I understand that it perpetuates inequality and I feel guilty about it. I support higher taxes on rich people and estates to make it harder for people like me to do it.