So I'm I being too picky...I don't want to date a man with a child
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Anonymous
| The only exception will be a widow if it's one child only. I'm having an argument with my cousin. I love kids I want my own but I just don't want to deal with ex-wife drama. Granted not all ex wIves are malicious but I can see chaos in the type of relationship. I like a lot of attention and enjoy spending time with my partner and it's unfair for a man to give me the attention I want and take away time from his kid (s). Ive always thought it's best for me to marry a childless man. My cousin says I'm too picky and i told her I know myself and what works for me and what doesn't. I believe in compromises I just can't compromise on that issue. I wonder what divorced or separated men with children who are dating think about this. |
Anonymous
| I feel the same way. This isn't too picky its smart. |
Anonymous
+1 million |
Anonymous
+1 million |
Anonymous
|
How old are you?
Depending on age, you're going to get to a point where just about every potential date has a kid and is divorced. Something about this post reads older. I don't remember any of my 20-something or 30-something friends worrying about this. When you get to 40's just about everyone you meet will be on their second marriage. |
Anonymous
| They are probably thinking the feeling is mutual. |
Anonymous
|
If that is your only criteria, and you are in your 20s, no kids, never been married, then you are not being picky.
But if you are 40, divorced, or have kids of your own, and you also want him to be 40-55, 6', 180-200 pounds, make at least $150k, have no living relatives, Ivy-educated, voting for Hillary, willing to renovate your house, and not wear graphic tees or glasses, you may be waiting awhile. If you are willing to wait without complaing, then it's fine. |
Anonymous
|
I have two step children. His ex wife was wonderful to me while we were dating. We were actually friends. I would pick the kids up from school and take them places and she loved that we had a great relationship.
The minute we got engaged that all changed. She became insufferable. Kept taking us to court to get custody changes because she didn't want another woman raising her children. Scrutinized every move I made in regards to her children. They are adults now and she is still pissy and bitter over anything they do regarding me. Because of this she has actually pushed them away. It made me sad because pre-engagement I couldn't believe how lucky I got and thought she and my husband would be able to continue to coparent peacefully. |
Anonymous
Yes. According to my girl friends, the worst dates are the ones do not have kids. They try to compete with kids for attention and do not understand why they will never win. |
Anonymous
Wow, way to make it all about you. Perhaps start your own thread? |
Anonymous
WTF? This PP is anecdotal evidence supporting the OP. |
Anonymous
I think you're missing the point that she's supporting OP by sharing her real-life example of what can happen when you date a man with kids. Op, I think this depends a lot on your age. Under 35, you can probably fairly easily find a childless guy. Over 40 it will be much harder. |
Anonymous
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How old are you, OP?
If you are 30 or under, you are fine. 35+ maybe ok. Over 40 is going to be tough. |
Anonymous
| What if it is a really good guy and his ex is remarried. They have a good parenting relationship and minimal drama. What is so bad about that? |
Anonymous
| I never wanted to date a guy with kids, but took a chance on my husband. I "love" my husband and the life we have. His ex is a slight pain, but not horrible. What's more difficult is finding common ground on parenting. Even so, I don't regret anything. But I think it's very important to know yourself, what you want, and go for that. Don't set yourself up for failure. |