Team Sports, Stop paying your kids for individual goals

[Anonymous]

I can't even watch this ridiculous shit anymore. Pass to the open player. Win for the team not for for parent payouts. Your kid isn't going to Harvard playing a team sport solo. Get a grip parents. Stop the cash flow.

[Anonymous]

Who's paying their kid to play sports?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Who's paying their kid to play sports?

Grandpa.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I can't even watch this ridiculous shit anymore. Pass to the open player. Win for the team not for for parent payouts. Your kid isn't going to Harvard playing a team sport solo. Get a grip parents. Stop the cash flow.

what are you prattling on about

[Anonymous]

Oh my god, are people actually doing this?? Yeah, let's pay our kids to be selfish players. Jeezus.

[Anonymous]

Stop paying them for grades and chores too.

[Anonymous]

My kid plays hockey and there are always parents who pay their kids for goals. Breaks down the team dynamics bc the kid doesn't give a shit if the team wins, just if he gets his $.

My kid is the highest goal scorer on his team--I would never pay him (they need to learn to self motivate), we barely even talk about it with him (focus is on effort and good attitude).

[Anonymous]

Is it ok if I bribe my kid with ice cream to score goals? Because she is really, really motivated by the idea of ice cream after a game.

[Anonymous]

This drove me crazy as a coach. U7 kid would score his hat trick, run over to Dad, collect his money and go home. Thanks for playing.

[Anonymous]

And coaches don't offer lollipops or patches if a kid performs a skill in a game?

There is nothing wrong with "bribes" or rewards for your kids. They should be in support of development and are rather commonplace.

The only problem I have with the rewards for goals is it is outcome based. I have made the same mistake and now will reward based on preforming particular skills or general effort and hustle.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This drove me crazy as a coach. U7 kid would score his hat trick, run over to Dad, collect his money and go home. Thanks for playing.

Are you kidding???? Who the hell are these terrible parents??/

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:And coaches don't offer lollipops or patches if a kid performs a skill in a game?

There is nothing wrong with "bribes" or rewards for your kids. They should be in support of development and are rather commonplace.

The only problem I have with the rewards for goals is it is outcome based. I have made the same mistake and now will reward based on preforming particular skills or general effort and hustle.

A goal is the definition of outcome-based. And yes, there is something wrong with bribing kids to perform in sports.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:And coaches don't offer lollipops or patches if a kid performs a skill in a game?

There is nothing wrong with "bribes" or rewards for your kids. They should be in support of development and are rather commonplace.

The only problem I have with the rewards for goals is it is outcome based. I have made the same mistake and now will reward based on preforming particular skills or general effort and hustle.

A goal is the definition of outcome-based. And yes, there is something wrong with bribing kids to perform in sports.

Or a "goal" could be defined as something you set out to achieve in a game.

If you successfully beat a kid with a step over i'll give you $1.00. If you make three successful passes another $1.00.

or replace the dollar with a lollipop.

The point is it can help kids try things in games that they would be to nervous otherwise to try, for fear of failing.

Get off your high horse.

[Anonymous]

And I suppose none of you give rewards for A's on a report card.

Rewards can be motivating to kids, the problem you have is what parents may choose to reward. If done properly and judiciously they can be used to help break bad habits or create new ones. They can also backfire. But if you think the juice box at the end of the game or the ice cream waiting for them isn't a Pavlovian reward for participating on a day that they perhaps had to be dragged out of bed or away from their favorite cartoon to go and play than you are lying to yourself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:And I suppose none of you give rewards for A's on a report card.

Rewards can be motivating to kids, the problem you have is what parents may choose to reward. If done properly and judiciously they can be used to help break bad habits or create new ones. They can also backfire. But if you think the juice box at the end of the game or the ice cream waiting for them isn't a Pavlovian reward for participating on a day that they perhaps had to be dragged out of bed or away from their favorite cartoon to go and play than you are lying to yourself.

But an A on a report card is, without question, the best thing you can do in a class.

Scoring a goal might not be the best thing for the team. Maybe someone else had a better shot. Or maybe the poor coach is watching a bunch of kids fight with each other to score goals while no one plays defense or moves the ball through midfield.

Want to promise a kid ice cream if he/she gives a good effort in a game -- or actually BEHAVES in a game? OK, fine. But don't save your rewards for the kids who hang out in front of the Pugg goal for a shot at big money.