Worried about ASD in my baby. Sorry to be "that mom."
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Anonymous
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Hi, I first want to apologize if I annoy or offend anyone. I know those of you with children on the spectrum get sick of the autism worry posts. I just feel worried and I'm driving myself crazy reading and just don't know what is typical at this age. My son just turned six months. He's my second, and I really can't remember what my first was like at this age except that people always described him as a "sunny" baby. My younger one seems more serious and less smiley. He does smile and laugh, but usually if I'm being really silly or making a big production. The weird thing is that he seemed more responsive/interactive around 4-5 months and now still interacts but seems more interested in looking at things around him and trying to get on the move/grab everything. He sometimes smiles when I smile at him and sometimes doesn't - seems to depend on his mood and how rested he is. When we're out in public, he really doesn't engage with strangers much. If they talk to him and try to get him to smile, he will very rarely smile in return, and sometimes actually looks away over my other shoulder - can't tell if he's being shy or what. Other times he will respond with a flirty smile when strangers talk to him, especially in a quieter environment like a house. Sometimes he will smile/giggle at his brother's antics, other times he will look away like he's kind of annoyed.
His eye contact is usually okay. If he's just hanging out in his high chair or bouncy seat, he will track me moving around the room and makes eye contact when I look at him. However, when I hold him on my lap, he tends to look off to either side at things around the room rather than at me. He coos, squeals, and makes some "ah-ya-ya" and "ba!" types of noises, but no mamama, dadada, etc. babbling yet. He responds when I call his name probably half the time. He likes when I sing to him and will smile at peek a boo if he's in a good mood. He's overall pretty laid back and has an easy temperament, but I wouldn't call him a super smiley baby. I guess it's just that I was reading one of those monthly development/milestones websites and it said something along the lines of, "your six month old is extremely social and may tire of the most interesting toy, but never tires of your attention and interaction... She always has a smile when you look at her, etc..." And I was thinking, that's not really how my baby is. I know babies are all different and have different personalities, but it's hard not to compare. I don't really know what I'm looking for here. I feel ridiculously anxious about this and I feel like I can't even enjoy my baby. I don't even know why I started obsessing about this all of a sudden, but now it's all I can think about! I know that ASD isn't/can't even be diagnosed until much later, but I keep reading all this stuff about the importance of early, intense intervention and I think - what is normal? Am I expecting too much from him at this age? Ugh, thanks for reading this novel. Be gentle with me, I know I sound neurotic. I also know that ASD is not the end of the world - i just hate uncertainty. It's going to be a long two years watching his development. |
Anonymous
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My child has high functioning autism. He hit all of his milestones on time, but he he didn't do several of the things that your child is doing. He didn't play peek-a-boo. He didn't babble. He didn't make much noise at all. He didn't point. He didn't make eye contract. He didn't smile much and did not return smiles. He wasn't very interested in what people were doing, but loved to watch fans and machines with moving parts.
Your child sounds like an introvert and a serious little person, not a kid with an ASD. |
Anonymous
| When I read these posts, I think the parent needs help with anxiety. If doctors can't diagnose in person at this age, what do you expect from nonexpert anonymous internet posts? I don't mean to be cruel, but get some help so you can relax and enjoy your baby. |
Anonymous
I agree with this poster- I think you need to get some help managing anxiety and understanding that normal is a range and not a point. Your post reads from the "normal 6 month old" baby dictionary. |
Anonymous
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He sounds fine.
You could use a Xanax. |
Anonymous
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Sorry- going to come off as cruel. Sorry that your worst fear is having an ASD kid- like mine.
Grow up lady- and learn some tact. |
Anonymous
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I'm going to echo the others. Call your PCP and ask for an assessment for postpartum anxiety. You are freaking out over nothing. Your baby may be on the spectrum. He probably isn't. But the fact that you are already freaking out about the next two years until you can get him assessed makes me think he is not the problem.
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Anonymous
Did you read her second to last sentence? |
Anonymous
| OP, you need help. You may not mean to be offensive, but your post is indeed offensive. You should talk to your child's doctor about his development and consider a therapist for your own anxiety. |
Anonymous
I did. And it's still offensive. I don't get to say 'don't take offense- but I'm afraid of being fat/ugly/poor/rude... Like you. |
Anonymous
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I am a mom of a kid on the spectrum and I am not offended. I also have anxiety though, so I get that piece too.
Ironically I wasn't worried about autism since my older child us dyslexia- I focused my anxiety on that. So I probably missed some early signs of ASD. But we figured it out at 3. Before then I had prepared a whole set of phonics interventions for him- poor kid 
I mean this kindly- please step away from the milestone lists and Google. They aren't helping you. And consider some self-care. Go for a walk and when you come back enjoy your serious little baby. It sound like it is fun getting a smile out of him. If your worries are overwhelming to you- please consider seeing a therapist. |
Anonymous
| Just as your child's mood and temperament and attitude changed from months 4-5 to month 6, so will they change again next month and the month after that. |
Anonymous
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Agree the the PPs that your anxiety is the issue, not your DS. And, yeah, it's offensive. It's one thing to have these worries after your DC has been assessed or after you get a diagnosis or while you are encountering real challenges. You're not.
If you really wanted answers to real concerns, you'd ask for a referral to a developmental specialist or you would enroll in one of the NIH studies on ASD/developmental delays like this one https://clinicaltrials.gov/ct2/show/NCT00271622?term=autism+and+bethesda&recr=Open&rank=4 . They've been talked about extensively on this board as have recommendations for when there are real concerns. Yet, you don't seem to have found any of those threads. Help your DC by helping yourself. Oh - and if you do go to one of the studies, stick with it. You need to make some sort of contribution to the SN community. |
Anonymous
| What you are describing sounds like what I was telling the doctor 7 years ago. My DS sounds like yours OP. Turns out he is just a more serious 7.5-year old who used to be shy and is somewhat growing out of that but who just has a more serious personality. He has no issues or problems at all. So, don't worry. And to everyone who is offended, tough, she didn't say anything offensive. We all hope for the best health for our kids and everyone has different issues. Nothing wrong with going out on this forum and asking questions and advice. |
Anonymous
It's great that you don't feel offended. However, my son has autism, and I find the post offensive. |