Feel gut-punched by SIL's comment I overheard

[Anonymous]

I have no siblings, and DH just has one sister, so we are a small family unit and spend a lot of time together. SIL and I have different interests but get along well and (I thought) have true affection for one another.

Last night at a large gathering, I was chatting with one of SIL's friends, and SIL (who was a bit drunk) came over and asked her friend if she needed to be rescued. SIL thought she was whispering, but obviously wasn't.

I can't stop replaying it and just feel so blue. I can think of only two possibilities -- that I had bad breath or that I talk too much -- but I don't have any reason to think it was either of those, so I'm at a loss.

If I thought it would resolve anything, I might ask SIL about it, but I think she'd just pretend not to remember saying it and it would only make things awkward.

I just feel sad. Thanks for reading.

[Anonymous]

Maybe since she was doing a faux whisper, she thought she was making a joke. Drunk humor is different from sober humor. If you've always had a good relationship, I wouldn't let one drunk comment ruin it.

[Anonymous]

First off, she was drunk. Secondly, why do you care what drunk people say? She's obviously not a perfect person, so don't beat yourself up over it. Even if you had bad breath, or talk too much, that's preferable to being a drunk.

[Anonymous]

Some people may like their inlaws but still think others don't necessarily want to hang with them. Or maybe she was oddly a little jealous that you and her friend were hitting it off to whatever degree, so she said something joking but awkward. I wouldn't worry about it.

[Anonymous]

Don't read too much into it. I could see it just being a general joke about bringing a friend to a family event and joking about how awful your family is in general.

[Anonymous]

How did the friend react?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Some people may like their inlaws but still think others don't necessarily want to hang with them. Or maybe she was oddly a little jealous that you and her friend were hitting it off to whatever degree, so she said something joking but awkward. I wouldn't worry about it.

+1

[Anonymous]

I'd ask her but I like things to be direct and clear

[Anonymous]

If you otherwise have a good relationship, I would let this go as a moment of stupidity and obnoxiousness. Don't let it define your relationship.

I've seen too many relationships (mine own included) ruined because of people overanalyzing and second-guessing others.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Some people may like their inlaws but still think others don't necessarily want to hang with them. Or maybe she was oddly a little jealous that you and her friend were hitting it off to whatever degree, so she said something joking but awkward. I wouldn't worry about it.

+1

+2 I also think this was more about her than about you.

[Anonymous]

The title of your post is a bit dramatic OP.

[Anonymous]

I would feel bad too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would feel bad too.

I would too. And I know that I would not feel the same again. I'm sorry, OP.

[Anonymous]

That'd gut punch me too. Once, my SIL was drinking (though not drunk) and at a dinner with lots of people while talking about the possibility of having a baby with my brother she said, "If I could just clone myself to have a baby, I would." And I was thinking, "Wow, if you think our genes are that awful why'd you even marry Brother?"

Cut to now - she has a baby (not cloned, but with my brother's genes in there too) and we are polite but not at all friendly or close.

[Anonymous]

It's probably the bad breath thing.