What does "Fit" Mean Anyway?

[Anonymous]

Another online dating vent, I suppose. Every guy 45-55 says he is looking for someone fit. They all seem to run or bike or hike or all three.

I consider myself thin-ish. I would like to lose about 8 lbs. If I do, this would put me on the very low end of normal weight for my height. I am a solidly normal weight for my height now.

Do I run triathilons? No. Would anyone in any way shape or form call me fat? No. Will my poor c-section cut abs and mild diastasis recti ever look like a supermodel's abs? No. Do I spend hours in the gym every day? No. Because working.

So do I say I am of "average" build and skip the guys seeking someone fit? Or not?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Another online dating vent, I suppose. Every guy 45-55 says he is looking for someone fit. They all seem to run or bike or hike or all three.

I consider myself thin-ish. I would like to lose about 8 lbs. If I do, this would put me on the very low end of normal weight for my height. I am a solidly normal weight for my height now.

Do I run triathilons? No. Would anyone in any way shape or form call me fat? No. Will my poor c-section cut abs and mild diastasis recti ever look like a supermodel's abs? No. Do I spend hours in the gym every day? No. Because working.

So do I say I am of "average" build and skip the guys seeking someone fit? Or not?

Say your average. Skip the douches looking for fit models. Posting a picture should be enough. Good luck.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Another online dating vent, I suppose. Every guy 45-55 says he is looking for someone fit. They all seem to run or bike or hike or all three.

I consider myself thin-ish. I would like to lose about 8 lbs. If I do, this would put me on the very low end of normal weight for my height. I am a solidly normal weight for my height now.

Do I run triathilons? No. Would anyone in any way shape or form call me fat? No. Will my poor c-section cut abs and mild diastasis recti ever look like a supermodel's abs? No. Do I spend hours in the gym every day? No. Because working.

So do I say I am of "average" build and skip the guys seeking someone fit? Or not?

Hmm. No, I put either "fit" or "thin" if those are the drop down choices. No one will find you if you put "average." Once you get past the filter, let them decide if they are attracted to you.

I know that sounds slightly unscrupulous but getting past the filter is pretty important in online dating. But do make sure to put up accurate full-body photos.

[Anonymous]

Fit and thin are two different things.

Are you active otherwise / despite your weight?

Fit it me is not necessarily thin, it's an athletic build. Neither thin nor "thick", also alludes to a lifestyle.

[Anonymous]

Ha! I was on eharmony and I noticed the same thing. All pics of guys finishing marathons or posing on some mountain peak. I'm 5'3", maybe 120 pounds. Definitly thin, and what I consider "fit", but I don't run and I def don't work out everyday.

I would say you enjoy the outdoors (if you do) and are thin build. Don't use the word "fit" if you feels it misrepresents you. That just annoys online daters.

[Anonymous]

When I think "fit," I think - could you run a 5k (all running) if you really tried? Not that you have to run 3.1 miles every day, but could you do it? Could you hike all day and survive ok? Like you might be a tiny bit sore the next day, but you won't be really sore or worn out. Can you do 5 decent push-ups?

"Fit" is a balanced way of saying you're reasonably active. Maybe not hours in the gym every day, or be a triathlete, but you're in decent physical shape.

[Anonymous]

I know men don't like fat women as a rule, but just because men are into triathlons doesn't mean they are looking for hyper-fit women.

I dated a marathon runner for a long time and I am the laziest woman alive. My body is probably a lot like you describe, OP.
He didn't mind at all that I wasn't into serious fitness, although I don't think he would have liked me if I was overweight, which it sounds like you are not.

[Anonymous]

You are thin or "height-weight appropriate." You may or may not be fit.

"Fit" means you exercise and enjoy an active lifestyle. You run, hike, dance, scuba, crossfit or something similar. If you don't work-out, then you aren't fit.

[Anonymous]

Men say "fit" because its nicer than saying "no fat women please"-- answer fit if you are not fat. This isn't about doing triathlons. trust me. I am happily married from Chemistry. com

[Anonymous]

I was 170 and physically fit when I started dating my fiancé. I worked out and enjoyed hiking for hours. I just wasn't thin.

Then, I got sick.

Now, I'm 40 lbs lighter which looks thin on me. All my curves are disappearing. I haven't exercised in almost 3 months and my doctor won't clear me to go back to the gym. I am definitely not fit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I was 170 and physically fit when I started dating my fiancé. I worked out and enjoyed hiking for hours. I just wasn't thin.

Then, I got sick.

Now, I'm 40 lbs lighter which looks thin on me. All my curves are disappearing. I haven't exercised in almost 3 months and my doctor won't clear me to go back to the gym. I am definitely not fit.

curves are not from being in shape they are fat pockets

[Anonymous]

fit = taut tummy

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was 170 and physically fit when I started dating my fiancé. I worked out and enjoyed hiking for hours. I just wasn't thin.

Then, I got sick.

Now, I'm 40 lbs lighter which looks thin on me. All my curves are disappearing. I haven't exercised in almost 3 months and my doctor won't clear me to go back to the gym. I am definitely not fit.

curves are not from being in shape they are fat pockets

PP didn't say differently. You can fit and still have curves. It's a diet issue, not an exercise issue.

[Anonymous]

I think curves are a genes issue, unfortunately.

Curves mean butt and boob fat. Some women have those when they are thin, and some fat women don't ever have them.

I once read that butt and thigh fat facilitates high IQ in babies, especially when the mother has a diet high in omega 3's. Evidently this is why it's attractive to men.

Random share!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When I think "fit," I think - could you run a 5k (all running) if you really tried? Not that you have to run 3.1 miles every day, but could you do it? Could you hike all day and survive ok? Like you might be a tiny bit sore the next day, but you won't be really sore or worn out. Can you do 5 decent push-ups?

"Fit" is a balanced way of saying you're reasonably active. Maybe not hours in the gym every day, or be a triathlete, but you're in decent physical shape.

No, I could not run a 5K all running because I have exercise induced asthma. I could, however (and have a number of times) run a half-marathon using the Jeff Galloway run-walk method - for fun, with my girlfriends, and not because I am marathon obsessed. Could I hike all day? Yes and have recently. Could I do 5 decent push ups? Yes.

Do I work at any of this? No. I have a trainer I see about once per week. I like to walk in the mornings when my neighborhood is quiet and go for walks outside generally. I like to dance. I sometimes take a dance class at the gym. But am I committed to X number of hours of exercise per week? No. I try to get outside every day but don't always. Some weeks my workouts consist of putting my carry-on in the overhead bin. I am fundamentally interested in exercising if it is fun and social. Hours alone in the gym with heavy weights are not me - I was married to that. We did CrossFit together for a little while but he dropped it because the weightlifting was not serious enough, and then I got injured, so that was that. Again, happy to work hard but need the social.

So how do I figure out what kind of guy I am talking to? One that wants to make sure I won't keel over if we do something? Or the one that requires a committed exercise habit? Or maybe even one who would be interested only in my girlfriend who has cycle trained in Colorado at the OTC? I'm most definitely not either of the latter two. Perhaps I'll stick with thin as a PP suggests and avoid "fit"!