What does "Fit" Mean Anyway?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was 170 and physically fit when I started dating my fiancé. I worked out and enjoyed hiking for hours. I just wasn't thin.

Then, I got sick.

Now, I'm 40 lbs lighter which looks thin on me. All my curves are disappearing. I haven't exercised in almost 3 months and my doctor won't clear me to go back to the gym. I am definitely not fit.

curves are not from being in shape they are fat pockets

I miss my fat pockets. --PP

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When I think "fit," I think - could you run a 5k (all running) if you really tried? Not that you have to run 3.1 miles every day, but could you do it? Could you hike all day and survive ok? Like you might be a tiny bit sore the next day, but you won't be really sore or worn out. Can you do 5 decent push-ups?

"Fit" is a balanced way of saying you're reasonably active. Maybe not hours in the gym every day, or be a triathlete, but you're in decent physical shape.

No, I could not run a 5K all running because I have exercise induced asthma. I could, however (and have a number of times) run a half-marathon using the Jeff Galloway run-walk method - for fun, with my girlfriends, and not because I am marathon obsessed. Could I hike all day? Yes and have recently. Could I do 5 decent push ups? Yes.

Do I work at any of this? No. I have a trainer I see about once per week. I like to walk in the mornings when my neighborhood is quiet and go for walks outside generally. I like to dance. I sometimes take a dance class at the gym. But am I committed to X number of hours of exercise per week? No. I try to get outside every day but don't always. Some weeks my workouts consist of putting my carry-on in the overhead bin. I am fundamentally interested in exercising if it is fun and social. Hours alone in the gym with heavy weights are not me - I was married to that. We did CrossFit together for a little while but he dropped it because the weightlifting was not serious enough, and then I got injured, so that was that. Again, happy to work hard but need the social.

So how do I figure out what kind of guy I am talking to? One that wants to make sure I won't keel over if we do something? Or the one that requires a committed exercise habit? Or maybe even one who would be interested only in my girlfriend who has cycle trained in Colorado at the OTC? I'm most definitely not either of the latter two. Perhaps I'll stick with thin as a PP suggests and avoid "fit"!

Men pretty much only look at your pictures. The important thing is not to select something that means you won't come up in searches run by men who might actually be attracted to a picture of you. I think it's important to keep that in mind.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Fit and thin are two different things.

Are you active otherwise / despite your weight?

Fit it me is not necessarily thin, it's an athletic build. Neither thin nor "thick", also alludes to a lifestyle.

This. My skinniest friend, size 2 and 5'9", can't climb two fights of stairs without sucking wind. She is not fit at all. If you can't bike leisurely, go hiking, swim, etc. and other active hobbies, they probably aren't interested. It's a lifestyle.

[Anonymous]

Your picture matters way more than anything else and that's what guys will judge you by. I'd choose athletic or average and put up several full body shots and let them see for themselves.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your picture matters way more than anything else and that's what guys will judge you by. I'd choose athletic or average and put up several full body shots and let them see for themselves.

100% This will screen out all the guys that you don't want to waste your time on.
Don't write anything about your shape/size - the picture takes care of that. Write about everything else that makes you great.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Say your average. Skip the douches looking for fit models. Posting a picture should be enough. Good luck.

This is what I do. I'm on the slender side and pretty fit, although not ripped, but I describe myself as average. I have several recent, accurate full-body pictures. Most guys will just go by the pictures. If there are some that filter out "average" bodies and are only looking for thin or fit, they are too closed-minded for me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When I think "fit," I think - could you run a 5k (all running) if you really tried? Not that you have to run 3.1 miles every day, but could you do it? Could you hike all day and survive ok? Like you might be a tiny bit sore the next day, but you won't be really sore or worn out. Can you do 5 decent push-ups?

"Fit" is a balanced way of saying you're reasonably active. Maybe not hours in the gym every day, or be a triathlete, but you're in decent physical shape.

No, I could not run a 5K all running because I have exercise induced asthma. I could, however (and have a number of times) run a half-marathon using the Jeff Galloway run-walk method - for fun, with my girlfriends, and not because I am marathon obsessed. Could I hike all day? Yes and have recently. Could I do 5 decent push ups? Yes.

Do I work at any of this? No. I have a trainer I see about once per week. I like to walk in the mornings when my neighborhood is quiet and go for walks outside generally. I like to dance. I sometimes take a dance class at the gym. But am I committed to X number of hours of exercise per week? No. I try to get outside every day but don't always. Some weeks my workouts consist of putting my carry-on in the overhead bin. I am fundamentally interested in exercising if it is fun and social. Hours alone in the gym with heavy weights are not me - I was married to that. We did CrossFit together for a little while but he dropped it because the weightlifting was not serious enough, and then I got injured, so that was that. Again, happy to work hard but need the social.

So how do I figure out what kind of guy I am talking to? One that wants to make sure I won't keel over if we do something? Or the one that requires a committed exercise habit? Or maybe even one who would be interested only in my girlfriend who has cycle trained in Colorado at the OTC? I'm most definitely not either of the latter two. Perhaps I'll stick with thin as a PP suggests and avoid "fit"!

PP put down thin. You may be fit but you are on the below average side of fitness; it might disappointment men who are very active.

I'm fit - fit to me means you can at least jog a 5K in less than 30 minutes and deadlift your body weight. This is a minimum fitness most people achieve after working out diligently for 3 months.

[Anonymous]

Ah, but can you snatch your body weight, PP? Even better, how about three times your body weight? A body weight deadlift is not really a big deal.

[Anonymous]

I doubt these guys online care about a woman who is truly fit or athletic. They just don't want someone to be fat or on their way there. All that talk about triathlons and what not is designed to scare off fat women while simultaneously making him look good and interesting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was 170 and physically fit when I started dating my fiancé. I worked out and enjoyed hiking for hours. I just wasn't thin.

Then, I got sick.

Now, I'm 40 lbs lighter which looks thin on me. All my curves are disappearing. I haven't exercised in almost 3 months and my doctor won't clear me to go back to the gym. I am definitely not fit.

curves are not from being in shape they are fat pockets

I miss my fat pockets. --PP

Sorry PP, curves are gorgeous. Both men and women are supposed to have some body fat. Women a little bit more. Hope you feel better soon.

[Anonymous]

Put thin or slim or whatever they offer, and post a flattering but honest full-body picture and you're good to go!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I doubt these guys online care about a woman who is truly fit or athletic. They just don't want someone to be fat or on their way there. All that talk about triathlons and what not is designed to scare off fat women while simultaneously making him look good and interesting.

I don't doubt they want a thin woman but many men actually want someone who shares their hobbies. Shocker, I know.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I doubt these guys online care about a woman who is truly fit or athletic. They just don't want someone to be fat or on their way there. All that talk about triathlons and what not is designed to scare off fat women while simultaneously making him look good and interesting.

I don't doubt they want a thin woman but many men actually want someone who shares their hobbies. Shocker, I know.

I haven't found that to be the main concern of men dating online, I've found they want to make sure they won't be getting catfished before meeting up, but everyone's experience is different.

[Anonymous]

Even was at was at peak fitness, I didn't put "fit" on a dating site. I agree that "fit" means you like to run. Ha! It shouldn't, but I think that's how it translates. Fitness is how some people start off conversations. You say "fit" and men ask about your workouts. At least this is what I got from girlfriends when we'd talk about it at the gym!

"Fit" is a lifestyle, not a body type for the purposes of a dating site. "Average" wouldn't get you the responses you want (well, not the number of hits). You'd be right to go "thin" in your case.

[Anonymous]

Op just say you are and move on. If the guy likes you, it will not be a problem.