42 and still single, is it over?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"And, I say this gently, I'd really look into why you aren't married and haven't dated in 14 years. That's not common."

This is total BS. If OP lives in the DMV, it is very common for this to happen if she's not doing OLD. In 10 years, I only met one man who asked me for my number and then followed up. Granted, the COVID years were in there, but still. You pretty much have to proactively do OLD to meet men.

And what’s your point? If you want not to be single and have a family, then you do the thing that by your own admission, you pretty much have to proactively do to find a partner so you are not single and can have a family. If you couldn’t get to online dating for 14 years, no, you don’t actually want a partner and to have a family that bad.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s never too late. Never. Ignore the BS from previous posters. Be open to finding connection. Don’t judge on appearance or background. All that matters in the end is the connections we have with others.

^This. If you're not good in bed, just look for someone a little older whose libido is low. There is a lid for every pot.

Sleep around and get pregnant


I’m good in bed, but I haven’t had sex in like 8 years. OP

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"And, I say this gently, I'd really look into why you aren't married and haven't dated in 14 years. That's not common."

This is total BS. If OP lives in the DMV, it is very common for this to happen if she's not doing OLD. In 10 years, I only met one man who asked me for my number and then followed up. Granted, the COVID years were in there, but still. You pretty much have to proactively do OLD to meet men.

And what’s your point? If you want not to be single and have a family, then you do the thing that by your own admission, you pretty much have to proactively do to find a partner so you are not single and can have a family. If you couldn’t get to online dating for 14 years, no, you don’t actually want a partner and to have a family that bad.

Bingo

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s never too late. Never. Ignore the BS from previous posters. Be open to finding connection. Don’t judge on appearance or background. All that matters in the end is the connections we have with others.

^This. If you're not good in bed, just look for someone a little older whose libido is low. There is a lid for every pot.

I’m good in bed, but I haven’t had sex in like 8 years. OP

So you know, you don't want any at around 48+. It will shrink, go back inside, or disappear completely.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:42F, and haven’t dated since I was 28. I want to be married, and have kids, but I’m afraid it’s too late now.. What should I do?

You’re not having kids. It’s not fair to them to have a geriatric parent. You can find a partner and “adopt” their kids - instant family. Get out and do stuff you love. Meet someone nice and stable - not “the man of your dreams”, just a really good person you enjoy spending time with. It’s possible. Don’t do online dating - do a hobby or join a gym that exposes you to new people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s never too late. Never. Ignore the BS from previous posters. Be open to finding connection. Don’t judge on appearance or background. All that matters in the end is the connections we have with others.

^This. If you're not good in bed, just look for someone a little older whose libido is low. There is a lid for every pot.

I’m good in bed, but I haven’t had sex in like 8 years. OP

So you know, you don't want any at around 48+. It will shrink, go back inside, or disappear completely.

If he folds it in half, maybe he can still stuff it in?

[Anonymous]

You dodged a bullet. Marriage and kids sucks for most women. Because I got married and had kids I’m stuck with my husband and I have less time and money. My career has suffered. I have less fun. I have serious regrets.

[Anonymous]

My friend got married in her mid 40s and immediately started trying to get pregnant. She did a few rounds of IVF, was pregnant twice but miscarried early. They ended up using a surrogate with her egg and her husband’s sperm. She’s 50, her husband is 55 and they have a 2 year old.

I have another friend who did egg retrieval in her mid 30 because she knew she wanted a husband and kids but also knew her age was creeping up on her. She was single but dating. After some years she was still single but did not want to use donor sperm so she asked a friend to be the biological father but he said no. Now she’s mid 40s, single, and pursuing adoption.

[Anonymous]

Don’t you see what men mistreat women out there? You avoided it for 14 years and now you want a man in your life? Are you out of your mind?
Why do you want to destroy the wonderful life you have now? Why do you want to lose your freedom? Why?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s never too late. Never. Ignore the BS from previous posters. Be open to finding connection. Don’t judge on appearance or background. All that matters in the end is the connections we have with others.

^This. If you're not good in bed, just look for someone a little older whose libido is low. There is a lid for every pot.

I’m good in bed, but I haven’t had sex in like 8 years. OP

So you know, you don't want any at around 48+. It will shrink, go back inside, or disappear completely.

Ew that’s disgusting. Do you mean because they get fat?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"And, I say this gently, I'd really look into why you aren't married and haven't dated in 14 years. That's not common."

This is total BS. If OP lives in the DMV, it is very common for this to happen if she's not doing OLD. In 10 years, I only met one man who asked me for my number and then followed up. Granted, the COVID years were in there, but still. You pretty much have to proactively do OLD to meet men.

Or just be hot and out in the world. Men will approach you.

I am hot and this never happened to me all my life.

What kind of men do you want? What do you want from them?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What is your BMI?

I’m 105 lbs, 5’2.

Have you considered eating more? That's awfully skinny and potentially unattractive to men. Try to avoid looking like a child when you dress.

That's a very normal slim weight for that height. I have a friend who is about that size and she has a nice figure.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"And, I say this gently, I'd really look into why you aren't married and haven't dated in 14 years. That's not common."

This is total BS. If OP lives in the DMV, it is very common for this to happen if she's not doing OLD. In 10 years, I only met one man who asked me for my number and then followed up. Granted, the COVID years were in there, but still. You pretty much have to proactively do OLD to meet men.

What is OLD?
I must be old myself as i have never seen this acronym

[Anonymous]

I have a number of friends who could have written this. Some had early young marriages that didn’t last and others have just been single since their mid-late 20s, none have kids though. They are extremely choosy and unwilling to compromise on anything. This is compounded by the fact that you get used to being/living on your own and having everything the way you like it and then you’re reluctant to make any lifestyle changes for a man.

The ones who did eventually marry had to compromise on age (8-10 years older OR younger) and job/income. You can do this pretty easily if you’re not dead set on having children. If you do want a child I would have one on your own at this point, but you would likely need to forego dating for about 10 years so as not to expose your young kid to abuse from “mom’s boyfriend.”

[Anonymous]

If you want a kid then you need to do that on your own asap.