Birthday party no shows

[Anonymous]

I think an additional issue (because the first issue is people are RUDE) is that now that most children attend childcare, and there is a strong feeling that every child in the class should be invited, that can get to 20 invites. Then add a few family friends' kids, a cousin or two and it's a big, expensive, party.

And yet, NOT inviting all 2 or 3 or 4 year olds to a party when you KNOW a child is going to talk about it ad nauseum for a week before and a week after their party is very rude and feels horrible. And, truly, the classmates are friends - some are better friends than others, but we all talk about "my friends at preschool" and teachers talk about "we are all friends here" so...

And therefore, my 1 child will get 20 invites, which is a lot.

Again - I should STILL RSVP to them - even if it's a NO it's better than a nothing. (and WORSE it to show up without RSVPing yes! I'd never do that, actually.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Stop inviting those people. I remember who they are and know that they are not for us.

+1 This happened to me where I wanted to invite all the kids in my kid's K class to be inclusive. One mom asked if she could invite her kid's twin sister (not in my kid's class).

And then she didn't show up and I had to pay for two no-show kids.

After that, i moved to having parties where I know the parent/kid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think an additional issue (because the first issue is people are RUDE) is that now that most children attend childcare, and there is a strong feeling that every child in the class should be invited, that can get to 20 invites. Then add a few family friends' kids, a cousin or two and it's a big, expensive, party.

And yet, NOT inviting all 2 or 3 or 4 year olds to a party when you KNOW a child is going to talk about it ad nauseum for a week before and a week after their party is very rude and feels horrible. And, truly, the classmates are friends - some are better friends than others, but we all talk about "my friends at preschool" and teachers talk about "we are all friends here" so...

And therefore, my 1 child will get 20 invites, which is a lot.

Again - I should STILL RSVP to them - even if it's a NO it's better than a nothing. (and WORSE it to show up without RSVPing yes! I'd never do that, actually.)

You're acting really put out about this. But the all class invites stop around 7. You'll go from 20 invites to maybe a handful and then the hurt feelings start when it's just 4 besties and your kid is the 5th and didn't make the cut and is upset. Then you'll wish for the easy breezy days of too many invites to know what to do with.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Stop doing parties like this. There really is no reason. You don’t need a special “party package” to enjoy any venue. Invite a few kids, pay for them when they get dropped off, order a pizza there if you can or take the kids back to your house for cake and ice cream. Two adult drivers should be able to transport at least kids. This is what we do and it’s so much nicer than the party package stuff.

So the solution is to not have a party your child wants because some guests are rude and don’t show?

Surely your kid can find something to do that doesn’t require you to commit to a specific number of people AND prepay for that exact number. I honestly can’t think of any venue where that is the only way to do it. Even climbing…you can pay per person. I’ve don’t climbing parties. They don’t even provide instructors. Even if yours does, you don’t have to use them. An adult that does the 30 min training can be the designated belay person for multiple kids, maybe 3-4?

[Anonymous]

There are too many expensive kids parties now. Just have some cake and ice cream and games at home.

I really think most people are overwhelmed right now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Stop doing parties like this. There really is no reason. You don’t need a special “party package” to enjoy any venue. Invite a few kids, pay for them when they get dropped off, order a pizza there if you can or take the kids back to your house for cake and ice cream. Two adult drivers should be able to transport at least kids. This is what we do and it’s so much nicer than the party package stuff.

So the solution is to not have a party your child wants because some guests are rude and don’t show?

Surely your kid can find something to do that doesn’t require you to commit to a specific number of people AND prepay for that exact number. I honestly can’t think of any venue where that is the only way to do it. Even climbing…you can pay per person. I’ve don’t climbing parties. They don’t even provide instructors. Even if yours does, you don’t have to use them. An adult that does the 30 min training can be the designated belay person for multiple kids, maybe 3-4?

I think this is about so much more than the cost per person. It is just as rude not to flake on a house party when you are expected. As a parent I am far more concerned about how children feel when they are expecting friends to come and then they don’t.

[Anonymous]

All those with bad manners certainly have a lot of excuses.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Stop doing parties like this. There really is no reason. You don’t need a special “party package” to enjoy any venue. Invite a few kids, pay for them when they get dropped off, order a pizza there if you can or take the kids back to your house for cake and ice cream. Two adult drivers should be able to transport at least kids. This is what we do and it’s so much nicer than the party package stuff.

So the solution is to not have a party your child wants because some guests are rude and don’t show?

Surely your kid can find something to do that doesn’t require you to commit to a specific number of people AND prepay for that exact number. I honestly can’t think of any venue where that is the only way to do it. Even climbing…you can pay per person. I’ve don’t climbing parties. They don’t even provide instructors. Even if yours does, you don’t have to use them. An adult that does the 30 min training can be the designated belay person for multiple kids, maybe 3-4?

Op here. When you book a party, they request a headcount a few days ahead of time. On the day of, I could probably even change it. When the party already started and you are expecting this person to come, they don’t adjust after the party. Don’t know what to tell you.

There are some rude people on this website who seem to think no showing is ok. This girl is a good school friend of my child. The mom is a bit of a mess. It is what it is.

Some people have their shit together and others don’t. If you have a work meeting, you would put it on your calendar. If your child has a birthday party that you RSVPd yes to, I would think that they would have some sort of calendar to remind them. Who knows?

We have a seven figure income and this $50 is nothing to us. I still think these people are really rude.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If they don’t open it or respond, they aren’t interested. It’s an invitation not a summons.

I knew the non-responders would show up with their justifications.

They are proud of the fact they don't look at invites and don't care if their kids are involved in the social scene. Very odd people so it must run in the family any way.

They're the ones who don't go to birthday parties because that's "family time." A two-hour party cuts into the five of them blocking an aisle together at Costco.

[Anonymous]

It’s rude at any age and any time to respond with a yes and then no show.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Stop doing parties like this. There really is no reason. You don’t need a special “party package” to enjoy any venue. Invite a few kids, pay for them when they get dropped off, order a pizza there if you can or take the kids back to your house for cake and ice cream. Two adult drivers should be able to transport at least kids. This is what we do and it’s so much nicer than the party package stuff.

So the solution is to not have a party your child wants because some guests are rude and don’t show?

Surely your kid can find something to do that doesn’t require you to commit to a specific number of people AND prepay for that exact number. I honestly can’t think of any venue where that is the only way to do it. Even climbing…you can pay per person. I’ve don’t climbing parties. They don’t even provide instructors. Even if yours does, you don’t have to use them. An adult that does the 30 min training can be the designated belay person for multiple kids, maybe 3-4?

Op here. When you book a party, they request a headcount a few days ahead of time. On the day of, I could probably even change it. When the party already started and you are expecting this person to come, they don’t adjust after the party. Don’t know what to tell you.

There are some rude people on this website who seem to think no showing is ok. This girl is a good school friend of my child. The mom is a bit of a mess. It is what it is.

Some people have their shit together and others don’t. If you have a work meeting, you would put it on your calendar. If your child has a birthday party that you RSVPd yes to, I would think that they would have some sort of calendar to remind them. Who knows?

We have a seven figure income and this $50 is nothing to us. I still think these people are really rude.

It is rude, but you seem bitter about the money. So don’t book those kinds of parties as it seems you have a flakey circle of friends

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Stop doing parties like this. There really is no reason. You don’t need a special “party package” to enjoy any venue. Invite a few kids, pay for them when they get dropped off, order a pizza there if you can or take the kids back to your house for cake and ice cream. Two adult drivers should be able to transport at least kids. This is what we do and it’s so much nicer than the party package stuff.

So the solution is to not have a party your child wants because some guests are rude and don’t show?

Surely your kid can find something to do that doesn’t require you to commit to a specific number of people AND prepay for that exact number. I honestly can’t think of any venue where that is the only way to do it. Even climbing…you can pay per person. I’ve don’t climbing parties. They don’t even provide instructors. Even if yours does, you don’t have to use them. An adult that does the 30 min training can be the designated belay person for multiple kids, maybe 3-4?

Op here. When you book a party, they request a headcount a few days ahead of time. On the day of, I could probably even change it. When the party already started and you are expecting this person to come, they don’t adjust after the party. Don’t know what to tell you.

There are some rude people on this website who seem to think no showing is ok. This girl is a good school friend of my child. The mom is a bit of a mess. It is what it is.

Some people have their shit together and others don’t. If you have a work meeting, you would put it on your calendar. If your child has a birthday party that you RSVPd yes to, I would think that they would have some sort of calendar to remind them. Who knows?

We have a seven figure income and this $50 is nothing to us. I still think these people are really rude.

If this is so little money to you then honestly, be grateful you have the means to give your kid these things and don’t let a no show ruin a happy day. All the money in the world can’t buy happiness - it is truly not worth it to be bitter at a mom who you think is a “mess” who “doesn’t have her shit together.”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Stop doing parties like this. There really is no reason. You don’t need a special “party package” to enjoy any venue. Invite a few kids, pay for them when they get dropped off, order a pizza there if you can or take the kids back to your house for cake and ice cream. Two adult drivers should be able to transport at least kids. This is what we do and it’s so much nicer than the party package stuff.

So the solution is to not have a party your child wants because some guests are rude and don’t show?

Surely your kid can find something to do that doesn’t require you to commit to a specific number of people AND prepay for that exact number. I honestly can’t think of any venue where that is the only way to do it. Even climbing…you can pay per person. I’ve don’t climbing parties. They don’t even provide instructors. Even if yours does, you don’t have to use them. An adult that does the 30 min training can be the designated belay person for multiple kids, maybe 3-4?

Op here. When you book a party, they request a headcount a few days ahead of time. On the day of, I could probably even change it. When the party already started and you are expecting this person to come, they don’t adjust after the party. Don’t know what to tell you.

There are some rude people on this website who seem to think no showing is ok. This girl is a good school friend of my child. The mom is a bit of a mess. It is what it is.

Some people have their shit together and others don’t. If you have a work meeting, you would put it on your calendar. If your child has a birthday party that you RSVPd yes to, I would think that they would have some sort of calendar to remind them. Who knows?

We have a seven figure income and this $50 is nothing to us. I still think these people are really rude.

If this is so little money to you then honestly, be grateful you have the means to give your kid these things and don’t let a no show ruin a happy day. All the money in the world can’t buy happiness - it is truly not worth it to be bitter at a mom who you think is a “mess” who “doesn’t have her shit together.”

I was annoyed after the party. I’m over it. DD saw the girl and asked why she didn’t come to her party and the girl was confused. She seemed to have not known. My daughter still likes the girl. I’m not a fan of the mom.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Stop doing parties like this. There really is no reason. You don’t need a special “party package” to enjoy any venue. Invite a few kids, pay for them when they get dropped off, order a pizza there if you can or take the kids back to your house for cake and ice cream. Two adult drivers should be able to transport at least kids. This is what we do and it’s so much nicer than the party package stuff.

So the solution is to not have a party your child wants because some guests are rude and don’t show?

Surely your kid can find something to do that doesn’t require you to commit to a specific number of people AND prepay for that exact number. I honestly can’t think of any venue where that is the only way to do it. Even climbing…you can pay per person. I’ve don’t climbing parties. They don’t even provide instructors. Even if yours does, you don’t have to use them. An adult that does the 30 min training can be the designated belay person for multiple kids, maybe 3-4?

Op here. When you book a party, they request a headcount a few days ahead of time. On the day of, I could probably even change it. When the party already started and you are expecting this person to come, they don’t adjust after the party. Don’t know what to tell you.

There are some rude people on this website who seem to think no showing is ok. This girl is a good school friend of my child. The mom is a bit of a mess. It is what it is.

Some people have their shit together and others don’t. If you have a work meeting, you would put it on your calendar. If your child has a birthday party that you RSVPd yes to, I would think that they would have some sort of calendar to remind them. Who knows?

We have a seven figure income and this $50 is nothing to us. I still think these people are really rude.

If this is so little money to you then honestly, be grateful you have the means to give your kid these things and don’t let a no show ruin a happy day. All the money in the world can’t buy happiness - it is truly not worth it to be bitter at a mom who you think is a “mess” who “doesn’t have her shit together.”

I was annoyed after the party. I’m over it. DD saw the girl and asked why she didn’t come to her party and the girl was confused. She seemed to have not known. My daughter still likes the girl. I’m not a fan of the mom.

Well, that was rude of your daughter to put her on the spot.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Stop doing parties like this. There really is no reason. You don’t need a special “party package” to enjoy any venue. Invite a few kids, pay for them when they get dropped off, order a pizza there if you can or take the kids back to your house for cake and ice cream. Two adult drivers should be able to transport at least kids. This is what we do and it’s so much nicer than the party package stuff.

So the solution is to not have a party your child wants because some guests are rude and don’t show?

Surely your kid can find something to do that doesn’t require you to commit to a specific number of people AND prepay for that exact number. I honestly can’t think of any venue where that is the only way to do it. Even climbing…you can pay per person. I’ve don’t climbing parties. They don’t even provide instructors. Even if yours does, you don’t have to use them. An adult that does the 30 min training can be the designated belay person for multiple kids, maybe 3-4?

Op here. When you book a party, they request a headcount a few days ahead of time. On the day of, I could probably even change it. When the party already started and you are expecting this person to come, they don’t adjust after the party. Don’t know what to tell you.

There are some rude people on this website who seem to think no showing is ok. This girl is a good school friend of my child. The mom is a bit of a mess. It is what it is.

Some people have their shit together and others don’t. If you have a work meeting, you would put it on your calendar. If your child has a birthday party that you RSVPd yes to, I would think that they would have some sort of calendar to remind them. Who knows?

We have a seven figure income and this $50 is nothing to us. I still think these people are really rude.

If this is so little money to you then honestly, be grateful you have the means to give your kid these things and don’t let a no show ruin a happy day. All the money in the world can’t buy happiness - it is truly not worth it to be bitter at a mom who you think is a “mess” who “doesn’t have her shit together.”

I was annoyed after the party. I’m over it. DD saw the girl and asked why she didn’t come to her party and the girl was confused. She seemed to have not known. My daughter still likes the girl. I’m not a fan of the mom.

Well, that was rude of your daughter to put her on the spot.

DP lol okay

Adults can’t be held to normal communication and etiquette standards, but kids should know the nuances of what it means to put people “on the spot.”