Too many doctor's appointments?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Really complained or just made a comment? Maybe you should take a sick day or pto on occasion to knock out multiple appointments in one day.

I live in an area where you take doctor's appointments when you can get them. Most people have long wait lists if they accept insurance (or even if they don't). So that's not realistic. Also, it's not like I have 2 appointments per week or so. It's once every 2 weeks I guess, I didn't count them. Maybe less.

Why do you have appointments every two weeks?

I have two kids. They each have a well visit at the pediatrician once a year, dentist appointments twice a year that they go to without me, one has a psychiatrist every three months. Then the random urgent care appointment for strep, maybe twice a year.

NP. Is it possible someone’s life is not just like yours?

I have dc into sports as well. There was a concussion with tons of follow up, a back issue that required an orthopedist, MRI and weekly PT. Plus add derm appts for acne, regular wellness visit, dental. It can add up fast. And if theres an issue, you want to be there as a parent for communication. And some doctors require a parent.

[Anonymous]

What would your boss say if you had a child with a disability or a chronic health issue?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a teen I rode my bike and went to dermatologist, dentist and orthodontist on my own.

We once sent our teen alone to the orthodontist and they called to let us know that wasn’t allowed. I don’t think a parent ever accompanied me to the ortho when I had braces.

I agree - this is a ridiculous suggestion.

+1.

A lot of people on this board have fully grown kids. They love to give advice about what they did in 2001 and are surprised it may not be totally relevant now.

This is not ridiculous. My DC gets allergy shots and we see teens come in all the time on their own. Same with the orthodontist. I get wanting to go if you can, but not going isn’t neglect. It’s actually probably helpful for them to do some of this routine stuff on their own so that when they’re on their own and have to go to the ER or something, it’s not their first time navigating a medical appointment.

[Anonymous]

They can go to the dentist for a cleaning without Mommy

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a teen I rode my bike and went to dermatologist, dentist and orthodontist on my own.

same, and pt when I had it.

NP. How on earth did this work? Minors can’t sign the paperwork. I doubt my kids’ doctors would even see then if they showed to unaccompanied, for liability reasons, if nothing else.

There's no paperwork for every visit to the dentist or orthodontist

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Really complained or just made a comment? Maybe you should take a sick day or pto on occasion to knock out multiple appointments in one day.

I live in an area where you take doctor's appointments when you can get them. Most people have long wait lists if they accept insurance (or even if they don't). So that's not realistic. Also, it's not like I have 2 appointments per week or so. It's once every 2 weeks I guess, I didn't count them. Maybe less.

Why do you have appointments every two weeks?

I have two kids. They each have a well visit at the pediatrician once a year, dentist appointments twice a year that they go to without me, one has a psychiatrist every three months. Then the random urgent care appointment for strep, maybe twice a year.

Is it that hard to imagine that the kids , of the mom/dad, have medical conditions that you may not know about? Jfc. It’s her leave. She’s entitled to use it as she wishes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your supervisor was inappropriate. I also have kids, and we all have doctor, dentist, eye doc appointments, and some also have dermatologist, gynecologist, etc. So that’s like 5 appointments per person over the year. And then sick visits. So maybe 2-4 more, depending on kids’ ages. It easily adds up but guess what? That’s normal. I would frankly just say, I was in an appointment that I took time off for. That’s it. If you have the leave, use it. There are going to be people who don’t believe you should have any sort of life outside of work. You have to set boundaries with them.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Try to schedule as many appointments as possible on one day and you take off work for the day and that will be MUCH less disruptive to your job.

This. Why would you be taking so many days off to take them to one-off appointments? Do it on an off-day for school and take one day sick leave for you. You have to plan ahead because other parents are doing the same thing. If recurrent appts (like therapy or physical therapy) the nanny takes them.

[Anonymous]

I used to send my au pair with them for routine things (like dentist appt) and they'd call me at the end of the appointment with instructions or to get permission for whatever they needed permission for.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I used to send my au pair with them for routine things (like dentist appt) and they'd call me at the end of the appointment with instructions or to get permission for whatever they needed permission for.

To do this, you may need to include a note giving the doc permission to treat in your absence. Best to call the front desk to ask in advance. (Same if you want the kid to go on their own. I did this once my kid could drive-- for routine things like dental cleanings.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your teenagers should be able to go to the dentist or dermatologist without you. If something comes up that you need to be involved in the decision making of, the kid or doctor can call or FaceTime you during the appointment. I started going to the ortho and dentist alone when I was 12 and to the allergist and pediatrician alone when I was 15 or 16.

I discovered that kids under 18 are not permitted to go to our dermatologist without a parent present. This is in Maryland. My daughter was a month shy of 18 and they sald she needed a parent.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your teenagers should be able to go to the dentist or dermatologist without you. If something comes up that you need to be involved in the decision making of, the kid or doctor can call or FaceTime you during the appointment. I started going to the ortho and dentist alone when I was 12 and to the allergist and pediatrician alone when I was 15 or 16.

I discovered that kids under 18 are not permitted to go to our dermatologist without a parent present. This is in Maryland. My daughter was a month shy of 18 and they sald she needed a parent.

I wondered about that too. Also, kids typically need a ride to appointments, unless you are in a city or teen has their license and a car.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Try to schedule as many appointments as possible on one day and you take off work for the day and that will be MUCH less disruptive to your job.

This. Why would you be taking so many days off to take them to one-off appointments? Do it on an off-day for school and take one day sick leave for you. You have to plan ahead because other parents are doing the same thing. If recurrent appts (like therapy or physical therapy) the nanny takes them.

She doesn’t have a nanny, she would have to hire a driving sitter every time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:They can go to the dentist for a cleaning without Mommy

They cannot. Since the COVID pandemic, our doctors don’t allow anyone under 18 in for a visit without a parent. The orthodontist does but only with a letter. It doesn’t matter since we live in suburbia and where it’s not walkable without public transport. Someone has to drive them.

Enough with the snowflakes need to be coddled. It’s the community we have built. They can’t do anything without someone playing an Uber driver or for me to pay an Uber driver. At that point, I’ll just take them and explain to my childless boss that yeah, people have families.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't think it's bizarre to point out that you're taking too much time off for appts, but I don't have the type of job where taking an hour or two off or taking the morning/afternoon off has no impact on my work/my coworkers. So someone who takes a lot of time off is definitely disruptive to the work flow (but thankfully we don't work 5 days a week so have the flexibility to get stuff done other days).

It doesn't have an impact in my position wither. She was complaining because I had not replied to a non-urgent email. I was in a dr appointment that required me to communicate with the dr and staff and which took 1.5 hours (plus going back and forth). The email wasn't urgent or important. She just wanted to prove a point, I guess.

As a boss and as a mom, yes, it's possible to take too much time. I would have a chat with you but it would be about work load and deliverables. I had an employee who was the primary parent for her children because her husband worked in professional sports and was gone most of the time. She took 3 small children to appointments but delivered all her work because she would work at night to compensate. She was awesome. If your boss is making comments that make you uncomfortable initiate a conversation about deliverables and make her comfortable.