Happily married but have feelings for someone else

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You are not happily married if you have feeling for someone else. FYI.

I agree with this. It means there are cracks you aren’t acknowledging. You need to be careful.

+1000000

OP your heads in the sand.

It's a legit thing that happens to people- it is called being in the fog. It's hard to see clearly when you are looking for things wrong in the spouse to explain to yourself why you should be spending your time with the other guy.

[Anonymous]

It happens to most

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Totally normal. It is what you do with it that matters.

+1

[Anonymous]

I’m happily married and I’ve been attracted to others but I can’t say I’ve had feelings for them. Some of the magic disappears after you’ve been married a long time but that’s natural. I have a guy in my office who looks like a young Tom Selleck and he is very hot but I don’t have feelings for him despite how good looking he is. I’m sure my husband has gone through the same thing because he’s not dead. We have a great relationship and work hard to stay attractive to each other and based on our love life we seem to be succeeding.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m happily married and I’ve been attracted to others but I can’t say I’ve had feelings for them. Some of the magic disappears after you’ve been married a long time but that’s natural. I have a guy in my office who looks like a young Tom Selleck and he is very hot but I don’t have feelings for him despite how good looking he is. I’m sure my husband has gone through the same thing because he’s not dead. We have a great relationship and work hard to stay attractive to each other and based on our love life we seem to be succeeding.

The so-called “magic” disappears in every marriage, OP.

No woman is truly attracted to their man after a few years and a few kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It took 16 years for this to happen, that’s the weird part.

You avoid them at all costs.

It’s a limerance anyway.

16 years of marriage?

Yea that’s a long time to go and never meet someone you are attracted to.

[Anonymous]

It’s a crush. I add them to my wank bank but wouldn’t actually have an affair.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s a crush. I add them to my wank bank but wouldn’t actually have an affair.

op is going to blow up their life for a fleeting crush that won’t stand the scrutiny of real life.

[Anonymous]

Physical attraction, nothing else = normal, I wouldn’t be concerned.

Romantic feelings = huge red flag

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m happily married and I’ve been attracted to others but I can’t say I’ve had feelings for them. Some of the magic disappears after you’ve been married a long time but that’s natural. I have a guy in my office who looks like a young Tom Selleck and he is very hot but I don’t have feelings for him despite how good looking he is. I’m sure my husband has gone through the same thing because he’s not dead. We have a great relationship and work hard to stay attractive to each other and based on our love life we seem to be succeeding.

The so-called “magic” disappears in every marriage, OP.

No woman is truly attracted to their man after a few years and a few kids.

What do you recommend in this situation? Continue having duty sex or let him have an AP?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Physical attraction, nothing else = normal, I wouldn’t be concerned.

Romantic feelings = huge red flag

It might be romantic

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I find myself in a similar situation. We are both married with kids, and she is so cute and personable. Ideally, if we were to act on our feelings, it would only be when we are at work conferences, maybe 3 to 4 times a year.

Don’t fool yourself, it won’t just be at work conferences and even if it is: there will still be heaps of emailing and talk about feelings. Women (even ostensibly happily married ones)don’t like to feel like an unpaid internet escort. There is NO such thing as recurrent NSA sex with a woman, repeat as necessary.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Physical attraction, nothing else = normal, I wouldn’t be concerned.

Romantic feelings = huge red flag

It might be romantic

Uh oh. Strap in for a bumpy ride.

[Anonymous]

Just don’t go to lunch together!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just don’t go to lunch together!

or drinks, or phone calls, or anything.