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Admissions and Applicants from Divorced Students
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Anonymous
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Does anyone know how admissions offices at top DC-area private schools perceive applicants whose parents are divorced? I never gave this much thought until recently when I read on a NYC listserv that several NYC schools had a reputation for turning their noses down on divorced applicants. I have no idea if that's valid and I'd like to think that an applicant's parents' marital status does not play a role, but I also know from personal experience that supporting a child's academics gets complicated when the child goes between two homes and that some divorced parents are high maintenance as far as communication and consistency go.
Thoughts? Insights? I'm divorced, shared custody. DC is currently enrolled in a fine private school, we may explore other schools in a few years, if DC outgrows this one. (It's on the small side.) Thank you in advance. |
Anonymous
| My divorced friend got in to Beauvoir. She has a lot of money. Money trumps divorce everytime. |
Anonymous
| My divorced friend's DC got into B... (before the blog police flame me). |
Anonymous
| Our children got into three excellent private schools last year & we're divorced. |
Anonymous
| OP here. So far, so good. The comment about the NYC school really unsettled me. If anyone else has anecdotes or thoughts, that would be great. |
Anonymous
| I think if the school thinks the parents will be difficult to deal with or not fully engaged in their child's education, they will be less likely to admit the child. Sometimes divorce causes those dynamics, but inversely sometimes those dynamics can be present in intact families! |
Anonymous
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I don't think you'll get your answer from anecdotes. The comparison should be what is the proportion of divorced parents at the "elites" versus the public schools in NWDC (or wherever the elite school is located). I think probably there is a bias, but not large (from the narrow vision of my son's school).
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Anonymous
I used to live in NYC and recall The Episcopal School which is a very prestigious pre-school which many parents considered to be the very best. The school is extremely competitive to get into but I have never heard of a family who didn't love it. Well, it is common knowledge that school frowns upon accepting children from divorced families. I am quite sure that no other school has this policy. Also note, it only runs through Pre-K. It is what it is... their loss. |
Anonymous
| We are friends with a former AD of one of the big three. This individual told us that while they certainly would never rule out a child solely on the basis of having divorced parents, the admissions committee is aware that likely there are greater "stressors" on this child, and they look at this carefully. |
Anonymous
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OP again.
13:11 Thanks but I do not see how comparing these ratios would help capture any biases on this count. I think the most useful ratios to compare would be the percentage of divorced applicants accepted versus the percentage of married applicants accepted over, say, a 10-year period. (Marital status obviously refers to parents.) Obviously that would only be a start, you'd have to weight for grades, test scores, less tangibles like interviews. Of course I'm not going to get those. So anecdotes and perception will have to suffice! |
Anonymous
| There will be a rebuttable presumption against your DC's application. No question. Such a presumption can be rebutted by money or power. Also, if both parents participate in the admissions process, and one clearly does not come across as an asshole, abuser, or cheater, then put that in the plus category. But mark my words, the AD will assume one of you fits into that category, so it'll be an uphill battle. |
Anonymous
But you'd need a variable for financial factors. Divorced parents may be supporting two households, and have less money available for tuition. |
Anonymous
| Yes a great proportion of FA requests would also be a factor, but comparing divorced parents at public versus private schools is not meaningful in analyzing acceptance rates at private schools. |
Anonymous
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But mark my words, the AD will assume one of you fits into that category, so it'll be an uphill battle. On what do you base this certitude? Thanks. |
Anonymous
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But isn't there also a bias that you need both parents (read Dad) to be involved because they want to make sure you will pay, donate, etc.? What about the situaiton where the divorced or separated mom is the (relatively) big money maker and clearly driving the train on the private school thing?
Or is it really they just want kids with no drama in their home life? |