How do you and DH spend your evenings, after the kids are in bed?

[Anonymous]

I ask because DH and I both work at home on our laptops from the minute we finish dinner (kids are already in bed) to the minute we go to bed. That's usually 3 hours, sometimes more. We take Fri and Sat nights off, but otherwise this is our life.

DH is at peace with our schedule -- we have demanding jobs and he accepts the costs. But I am increasingly unhappy with it. I feel like we're missing out on life, and yet I can't even imagine how we would spend our evenings if we weren't always working.

For those who have shorter work hours, help me out here. How do you spend your time in the evenings? What are we missing out on?

[Anonymous]

cuddling in front of TV and then sex.

[Anonymous]

computer plus some TV (sometimes separate shows, sometimes together)

[Anonymous]

usually we watch TV together while I am on the laptop with a glass of wine. Heaven...

[Anonymous]

Computer time, TV, sometimes sex.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:usually we watch TV together while I am on the laptop with a glass of wine. Heaven...

Same here, on laptop for personal things not work. Will watch TV in different rooms if one of us has a show DVR'd that we want to watch

[Anonymous]

This is so depressing - the laptop,then bed! It's the same for us and I hate it. We used to cuddle and watch TV and talk...now we are zoned out on out computers. I could give it up in a heartbeat, but he can't and then I feel alienated so I log-in, like now!

[Anonymous]

My husband is a couch potato and watches sports and movies that I dont like so I end up going upstairs with the baby and feed her and put her down. My husband stays downstairs with my son and watches/plays with him till bedtime so he doesnt try to wake up the baby. I sit on the laptop with mindless tv on in the bedroom. I dont feel married at all anymore. It is sad.

[Anonymous]

TV with lap dog and laptops most nights.

With a sprinkling of exercise on at-home equipment, or dog walks, or late night runs to grocery store.

[Anonymous]

Also TV, laptops, and sex. We try to eat dinner together if possible, if we didnt eat when DD was awake. Sometimes DH asks me to turn of the tv (I am a bit of an addict) and we read.

[Anonymous]

We check our emails, and internet.

[Anonymous]

I responded quickly before checking what others wrote, and thought we'd be the only ones with the internet / email combinations while the rest did something more meaningful / romantic. I looked up the thread and saw almost every signle post involves laptop / tv. Welcome to 2009!

[Anonymous]

I feel a little better about my incessant computering now! We eat dinner together, watch tv or a movie together, but I am on the computer the whole time (well, not during dinner). I know my husband wants me to put it away, and I do too, but wireless internet and the laptop make it just too easy. My attention span is shot, I guess. I find I need to do something with my hands (I used to be a smoker, so I think that's part of it) and clicking on the internet is mindless. We do talk while I'm on the computer. I feel like if I wasn't on the computer, I'd want to eat even more, and heaven knows I don't need that. Maybe I should take up knitting.

Last week we did a puzzle together. So dorky but very fun.

[Anonymous]

We used to spend time on our separate laptops, and it stifles intimacy (not sex necessarily). So DH decided we needed to make some changes. He put his computer away, and then demanded that I put mine away in the evening, too.

I greatly reduced my computer time. Then a few months ago, my sister came to visit. And I saw how her computer kept her from being a part of real life - from interacting with anyone, including her own daughter. My sister is depressed, and I feel really sorry for her. But that computer isn't helping her.

My computer is now in my office. I go in once a night to check e-mails quickly. But other than that, my DH and I watch tv, or read together or just talk. Best thing we've done for our marriage in a long time.

Oh - he had to fly to the West Coast tonight, so I can type away on DCUM this evening.

[Anonymous]

We recently implemented one night per week that is free of computer and TV. I'd really like to ditch cable and just use TV for the occasional DVD or movie. There are so many projects I'd like to do and books I'd like to read instead.....