If your ex husband remarried and had a second set of kids

[Anonymous]

Did your kids get "less" in terms of financial resources.
Some counselor told me that whenever she sees situations where the husband moves on and re marries, then has kids by the second wife. The cash just stops flowing and everyone ends up back in court.

[Anonymous]

I'm a product of my parents first marriage, and I would say I received less resources/guidance/money/opportunities than my younger siblings (on both sides). My parents were also over a decade older when the "second sets" were born, so naturally were more home-oriented with more resources and experiences, too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm a product of my parents first marriage, and I would say I received less resources/guidance/money/opportunities than my younger siblings (on both sides). My parents were also over a decade older when the "second sets" were born, so naturally were more home-oriented with more resources and experiences, too.

Same here. Sucks though.

[Anonymous]

I'm the second wife. DH had two daughters from previous marriages and a sin with me. He is fair. Whatever his son with me gets so do his daughters. They may even get more.

[Anonymous]

That didn't happen in my case. They did experience a drop in standard of living due to our divorce, because it's expensive to run two households. But my ex, for all his faults, has never had a problem paying his fair share of kid stuff. His new wife earns well herself and only wanted one child, so as his earning power has grown over time, things haven't been too bad even though there is another mouth to feed.

I do think it can happen, though. Either the dad is just a deadbeat, or some people just get in over their heads financially without meaning to, and then something has to give. Not trying to excuse this behavior, but I can see how it would happen.

[Anonymous]

Sin = son

[Anonymous]

Whenever there are more mouths to feed everyone has to give. If the first family had another child or 2, older children would have to get less. Sadly money really doesn't grow on trees.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sin = son

Damn, I was so hoping that was a Freudian slip.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sin = son

Freudian slip!

[Anonymous]

Absolutely, but it made us a lot more self-reliant and self-sufficient. My sister and I both finished school and found jobs without parental support, but my younger half-brother knew he had a safety net (my dad paid for his education and travel and bought him a car and apartment when he graduated) and spent a lot of time partying and traveling with friends. It really affected his employment prospects when the recession struck in 2008. Plus his girlfriend dumped him because she thought he was too dependent on his parents and she didn't want to deal with that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Absolutely, but it made us a lot more self-reliant and self-sufficient. My sister and I both finished school and found jobs without parental support, but my younger half-brother knew he had a safety net (my dad paid for his education and travel and bought him a car and apartment when he graduated) and spent a lot of time partying and traveling with friends. It really affected his employment prospects when the recession struck in 2008. Plus his girlfriend dumped him because she thought he was too dependent on his parents and she didn't want to deal with that.

You don't know that is why he screwed up. You might even have achieved more with better parental support. It might make you feel better to believe that is why things turned out the way they did, but don't fool yourself, kids do better with more parental support.

[Anonymous]

Yes, my youngest sibling by my dad got the lion's share financially. My ex is about to remarry and he's already slacked off to pay for his & fiancée's fertility treatments.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes, my youngest sibling by my dad got the lion's share financially. My ex is about to remarry and he's already slacked off to pay for his & fiancée's fertility treatments.

Slacked off as in late with child support?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes, my youngest sibling by my dad got the lion's share financially. My ex is about to remarry and he's already slacked off to pay for his & fiancée's fertility treatments.

I'm sorry, it will likely get worse.
Always a red flag when a man refuses to get a vasectomy, he has future plans.

[Anonymous]

This is why my husband got a vasectomy. I could have done a tubal ligation or whatever as I have NO desire to be pregnant ever again (age plus enough children!). But there was no way I was going to let him preserve his fertility for a potential second batch of kids.