How long does the man pick up the check?
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Anonymous
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Men, if you are a pick-up-tje-check kind of guy how long do you do this?
Women, do you expect men to keep picking up the check? Every time we go out, I offer to split the check, but he always says he'll get it. I'm starting to feel awkward and I definitely don't want him to think I'm taking advantage of him. What are the rules here? |
Anonymous
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At least the first two dates. After you are a more established couple and not just dating, you can talk about how you want to split things.
I've also had boyfriends who always footed the bill, but indefinitely initiated a conversation about it, and about what I could do to contribute, because much like you I didn't want to take advantage. |
Anonymous
| Forever. |
Anonymous
Man? Woman? Why? |
Anonymous
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At least a few dates, and when I was dating and wanted to contribute, I tried to do it in a way where I was buying something before the date (tickets, food to cook dinner, etc) instead of pulling out my wallet on the date - at least for a few months.
I would recommend that approach if he is being insistent about paying the bill but you want to contribute - plan a date where you can buy some stuff in advance; reserve tickets online, make him a dinner at home, pre-pay for massages, whatever. |
Anonymous
? |
Anonymous
The question was "How long does the man pick up the check?" The answer is "forever". Real men pay on dates. |
Anonymous
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I would say for sure the first two dates. The third possibly.
You should offer to pay your half by the third date, I would do so. If he protests, at least offer to pay the tip and leave a good one. If he continues insisting on paying for your meals out, then you can always return the favor (No!! Not like that...Get your heads out of the gutter people...Lol) by letting him eat stuff at your house. You could always suggest having him come to your place on occasion and you can always cook him a nice homecooked meal. |
Anonymous
+1 |
Anonymous
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I let him pay at first. After a few dates, I will offer to buy (not just split the check, but buy the whole thing). Some men refuse and others are okay with it. In general, my experience has been that men continue to pay about 2/3 of the time.
You also have to take into consideration other expenses. If you are paying for a babysitter to look after your kids, then the guy should probably pay. |
Anonymous
| Man here...during the "courtship" process, I pay for all of the dates. Once dating, I'd say it's about 80/20--I pay for most of the dates and she'll chip in with a few special treats. The lines are also blurred once you've been dating for a while because of groceries/expenses/etc. I may foot the bill for a Whole Foods trip, but then she may pick up Chipotle or Happy Hour. |
Anonymous
| By about the fourth date I offer to pay, but usually they don't let me. I try to find ways to contribute - getting to the theater first and buying tickets, bringing snacks on a hike, or cooking dinner at my place. I'm usually paying for a babysitter though so I end up spending more than the man anyway. Most of the men who have ended up being my boyfriends have always paid. |
Anonymous
Should I continue to offer to split? Is that appreciated? Do I assume he'll pay- that would just make me feel like an ass. |
Anonymous
Now, that is SO stupid. And what do women offer - sex? |
Anonymous
He's been a real gentleman so far. |