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I was thinking of just anonymously sending her this book
http://www.amazon.com/Think-Cheating-Probably-Suspicion-Right/dp/1608421007/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1427326040&sr=8-1&keywords=if+you+think+he%27s+cheating that way I'm not really "telling"--just giving her a heads up that she should do some research. What do you think? If I go to a store to buy an Amazon gift card, so that I don't have to use my credit card, and not use my amazon account will that keep it "anonymous?" |
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I think you should stay out of it.
And if you are who I suspect you are, he's not going to leave her for you. |
| Oh Jesus christ! If you want to have her know just tell the poor woman but don't play fucking mind games with her! |
| Too much damn trouble, get a life and stop riding her husband |
| Why would you do that? I think that is the key question. If she is a close friend or family member and you are motivated by love and concern, then yes ~ Of course you tell her. If you are motivated by anything else, you stay out of it. |
| Maybe just tell her? The book seems needlessly cute and unhelpful. Unless you do it and include a gift card that just tells her what's up. |
| Are you the one that talked endlessly about the anonymous text? |
Yes. That didn't work. Her phone must be set up to not allow those texts or something, because it was sent back to me as undeliverable. |
Please let it go. All of the signs are pointing to the fact that this is just not your news to tell. Why do you insist on taking this burden on your shoulders? |
| OP, are you the OW? |
OMG - are you OP?! |
| No I am not the OW |
| Are you at all spiritual OP? If you are, trust that God/the Universe/whatever will make sure the wife knows what she needs to know, when she needs to know it. You don't have to be the conduit for that news. |
| If your motivation in telling is anything less than honorable then don't do it. |
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You seem to have some reason for thinking the wife suspects but doesn't "know." Are you just posed your friend hasn't been caught and want to punish her - have you thought through what the unveiling of this "truth" means to everyone? What the wife doesn't want to know?
You are taking a lot of baggage into your own hands. |