Do you have experience with ADHD-1 (inattentive)?

[Anonymous]

I posted in the older kids forum and then the health forum, but several people suggested that I post here. A few people have suggested that DD may be ADHD inattentive type -- I'm actually hoping to hear that this is not atypical behavior. But I'm curious what people with experience with ADHD-1 think. This is basically what I posted, with a few clarifications

My almost 14 year old DD takes forever to do everything - from getting dressed to taking a shower, practicing her instrument, to doing homework (and no, this is not a new thing). She is very bright and gets all A's in honors courses, but it takes her twice as long has her friends. She literally does homework ALL weekend long and every night until like 10-11pm. She rarely has time for friends/social life because of it. She is not allowed to watch TV or have "screen time" on her computer during the week except for homework (although I'm sure she's sneaking in texts or internet time). She's easily distracted and procrastinates a lot. Is this unusual? She makes me crazy! I'm happy to take suggestions....

I just want to note that the homework is not too hard - it just takes a long time!
And also, I asked her over the weekend whether it bothers her that it takes her so long - and she said not really - although I know it bothers her that she doesn't have time for friends. She has told me more than once that she just doesn't work like me (I am type A and hurry to get everything done on my to-do list so I can enjoy my free time afterwards - although somehow, I never end up with the free time - I'm constantly on the go...)

[Anonymous]

Hi OP - I've raised two kids with ADHD-inattentive. You are not going to want to hear this but our daughter sounds exactly what you posted (down to even taking hours to take a shower) got misdiagnosed ("exec functioning disorder" "slow processing" "ADHD-inattentive" "Depression" "Generalized Anxiety disorder) at least four times. We didn't find out until she was 16 that she actually had Asperger's/now "on the spectrum". As an adult, it is very obvious now that she has Asperger's. I wish I had received correct testing results early on so I could have provided more intervention but we followed what the pediatrician ("perfectly NT - no issues"), private schools, five testers, three shrinks and two therapists told us. We started therapy and testing at four an no one got it right until age 16. I wish you only the best of luck and want to remind you to keep retesting every three years.

[Anonymous]

My DD, 14, doesn't do nearly as well academically as yours, but she does read and do assignments slowly. She was just diagnosed with ADHD inattentive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I posted in the older kids forum and then the health forum, but several people suggested that I post here. A few people have suggested that DD may be ADHD inattentive type -- I'm actually hoping to hear that this is not atypical behavior. But I'm curious what people with experience with ADHD-1 think. This is basically what I posted, with a few clarifications

My almost 14 year old DD takes forever to do everything - from getting dressed to taking a shower, practicing her instrument, to doing homework (and no, this is not a new thing). She is very bright and gets all A's in honors courses, but it takes her twice as long has her friends. She literally does homework ALL weekend long and every night until like 10-11pm. She rarely has time for friends/social life because of it. She is not allowed to watch TV or have "screen time" on her computer during the week except for homework (although I'm sure she's sneaking in texts or internet time). She's easily distracted and procrastinates a lot. Is this unusual? She makes me crazy! I'm happy to take suggestions....

I just want to note that the homework is not too hard - it just takes a long time!
And also, I asked her over the weekend whether it bothers her that it takes her so long - and she said not really - although I know it bothers her that she doesn't have time for friends. She has told me more than once that she just doesn't work like me (I am type A and hurry to get everything done on my to-do list so I can enjoy my free time afterwards - although somehow, I never end up with the free time - I'm constantly on the go...)

She may just have slow processing speed and not ADHD. But slow processing is very commonly found with ADHD. Please get her evaluated. Since she is 14, you may want to do it now rather than later bc with ADHD, she can get additional time on standardized tests like the PSAT and SAT and it sounds like she needs it. Also, with an ADHD diagnosis she can get a 504 so she is not spending her entire weekend doing homework. Many kids with ADHD can get shortened assignments and/or help with executive functioning.

Good luck!

[Anonymous]

OP here - thanks for responses so far. I so don't want to hear this. Plus my husband thinks I am ridiculous for thinking anything is off. A few reasons why:

-She is smart and gets great grades - if she is doing well in school, he doesn't see a problem.

-When she wants to focus and get something done - she can (for some reason, racing with her little brother gets her to move quickly, for instance).

-She, herself doesn't think there is a problem.

Does this change anyone's assessment?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here - thanks for responses so far. I so don't want to hear this. Plus my husband thinks I am ridiculous for thinking anything is off. A few reasons why:

-She is smart and gets great grades - if she is doing well in school, he doesn't see a problem.

-When she wants to focus and get something done - she can (for some reason, racing with her little brother gets her to move quickly, for instance).

-She, herself doesn't think there is a problem.

Does this change anyone's assessment?

She can have ADHD and have a high IQ. Lots of very smart people with ADHD and the smarter you are the better you can compensate. Being able to hyperfocus is a common ADHD trait.

Get her evaluated. My child's psychiatrist told me some funny stories about people who found they have ADHD when they are older including an UVA freshman and a 2nd yr law student who wanted to know why he could not read law books but had to listen to them on tape for the first year of law school. Medication can make a huge difference.

Also, 2/3 of people with an ADHD diagnosis grow out of having ADHD by their mid twenties without treatment as their brain matures but they can sure use some help until then.

[Anonymous]

Also, I have a friend who is currently a dean at a top 25 law school who was diagnosed with ADHD when he was all done with his education and was clerking for a federal judge.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hi OP - I've raised two kids with ADHD-inattentive. You are not going to want to hear this but our daughter sounds exactly what you posted (down to even taking hours to take a shower) got misdiagnosed ("exec functioning disorder" "slow processing" "ADHD-inattentive" "Depression" "Generalized Anxiety disorder) at least four times. We didn't find out until she was 16 that she actually had Asperger's/now "on the spectrum". As an adult, it is very obvious now that she has Asperger's. I wish I had received correct testing results early on so I could have provided more intervention but we followed what the pediatrician ("perfectly NT - no issues"), private schools, five testers, three shrinks and two therapists told us. We started therapy and testing at four an no one got it right until age 16. I wish you only the best of luck and want to remind you to keep retesting every three years.

What did the aspergers intervention do that the ADHD inattentive intervention did not do? To me they seem very similar and would take similar intervention to help both types of children.

[Anonymous]

I have a kid with Asperger's ASD and ADHD, combined type. The ASD is a social communication issue, it primarily affects how DS relates to peers. The ADHD mainly affects his behavior and is controlled with medication.

DH does not have slow processing or working memory issues or learning disabilities. Does not take an inordinate amount of time to do his schoolwork.

It's very helpful to get a neuropsych evaluation to tease out your child's issues so you can target the interventions.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here - thanks for responses so far. I so don't want to hear this. Plus my husband thinks I am ridiculous for thinking anything is off. A few reasons why:

-She is smart and gets great grades - if she is doing well in school, he doesn't see a problem.

-When she wants to focus and get something done - she can (for some reason, racing with her little brother gets her to move quickly, for instance).

-She, herself doesn't think there is a problem.

Does this change anyone's assessment?

I bet assessment shows gifted and add-inattentive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here - thanks for responses so far. I so don't want to hear this. Plus my husband thinks I am ridiculous for thinking anything is off. A few reasons why:

-She is smart and gets great grades - if she is doing well in school, he doesn't see a problem.

-When she wants to focus and get something done - she can (for some reason, racing with her little brother gets her to move quickly, for instance).

-She, herself doesn't think there is a problem.

Does this change anyone's assessment?

Hi OP - this is the first PP whose daughter with ADHD inattentive turned out to be an Aspie. Alas, no. DD is so smart she qualified for youth Mensa (if you are in to that sort of thing - I signed her up to bolster her self-confidence which is at an all-time low). She got As and B+s throughout middle school and upper school years, although she did have an IEP once we got the Asperger's diagnosis. I think her I.Q. is 147. She scored a combined 33 on the ACT (but not the writing part - she cannot write). She made honor society at college. But she cannot drive (she drives like Temple Gradin - go rent the movie if you have not seen it), cannot self-regulate at college, cannot get herself to wash her hair, take her meds or go to bed or get up on time. She has little self-awareness (she's probably emotionally about 12 years old) so when younger did not realize there was a problem except that homework took forever. She also would stay in the shower as long as we would let her. I have found some adult Aspies on this site who explained that for them showering is a nightmare because "it's like peeling my skin off when I remove my clothes" then in the shower they said "I don't want to get out because then I have to decide what clothes to put on; often I just put on my old clothes so I don't have to make the decision". Hygiene has become an issue in college - DD is working with a counselor there on the showering issue. For what it's worth, DH thinks the shower is the equivalent of Temple Grandin's "squeeze-box" but that makes sense only if you see the movie. For what it's worth, our pediatrician, like your husband, didn't think there was anything NT off. There clearly was. I wish I had got intervention earlier. Was your child late to potty train? Have GERD or digestive issues? Our pediatrician ignored all of those symptoms too. Only after seeing a ped. endocrinologist did we discover that DD was not making up all the trips to the pott and digestive issues. She had five year old fecalomas inside her, a distended colon, and mega-colon. She will never be normal. I'm posting this not to alarm you. Nothing like this existed when we went through the trauma. My DH didn't even know what Asperger's was when we got the diagnosis. I pray I am very wrong and that all will work out really well for you. BTW we relied on a lot of $$ tutors. Composition and writing will always be a challenge. BTW, check DD's vitamin D levels. There is a brand new study indicating a link between vitamin D deficiency at birth and autism. DD just got at vitamin D test at her college - she scored only 21.5 on the 25(HO) test. 30 to 70 is norm. 100 is high. . I also wish I had gotten her speech intervention. As an adult, it is very apparent. It wasn't when she was younger. Praying for you. I am coming to terms with the fact that my Aspie will probably never be self-sufficient and will be living with me for life after college. It's heartbreaking.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here - thanks for responses so far. I so don't want to hear this. Plus my husband thinks I am ridiculous for thinking anything is off. A few reasons why:

-She is smart and gets great grades - if she is doing well in school, he doesn't see a problem.

-When she wants to focus and get something done - she can (for some reason, racing with her little brother gets her to move quickly, for instance).

-She, herself doesn't think there is a problem.

Does this change anyone's assessment?

Hi OP - this is the first PP whose daughter with ADHD inattentive turned out to be an Aspie. Alas, no. DD is so smart she qualified for youth Mensa (if you are in to that sort of thing - I signed her up to bolster her self-confidence which is at an all-time low). She got As and B+s throughout middle school and upper school years, although she did have an IEP once we got the Asperger's diagnosis. I think her I.Q. is 147. She scored a combined 33 on the ACT (but not the writing part - she cannot write). She made honor society at college. But she cannot drive (she drives like Temple Gradin - go rent the movie if you have not seen it), cannot self-regulate at college, cannot get herself to wash her hair, take her meds or go to bed or get up on time. She has little self-awareness (she's probably emotionally about 12 years old) so when younger did not realize there was a problem except that homework took forever. She also would stay in the shower as long as we would let her. I have found some adult Aspies on this site who explained that for them showering is a nightmare because "it's like peeling my skin off when I remove my clothes" then in the shower they said "I don't want to get out because then I have to decide what clothes to put on; often I just put on my old clothes so I don't have to make the decision". Hygiene has become an issue in college - DD is working with a counselor there on the showering issue. For what it's worth, DH thinks the shower is the equivalent of Temple Grandin's "squeeze-box" but that makes sense only if you see the movie. For what it's worth, our pediatrician, like your husband, didn't think there was anything NT off. There clearly was. I wish I had got intervention earlier. Was your child late to potty train? Have GERD or digestive issues? Our pediatrician ignored all of those symptoms too. Only after seeing a ped. endocrinologist did we discover that DD was not making up all the trips to the pott and digestive issues. She had five year old fecalomas inside her, a distended colon, and mega-colon. She will never be normal. I'm posting this not to alarm you. Nothing like this existed when we went through the trauma. My DH didn't even know what Asperger's was when we got the diagnosis. I pray I am very wrong and that all will work out really well for you. BTW we relied on a lot of $$ tutors. Composition and writing will always be a challenge. BTW, check DD's vitamin D levels. There is a brand new study indicating a link between vitamin D deficiency at birth and autism. DD just got at vitamin D test at her college - she scored only 21.5 on the 25(HO) test. 30 to 70 is norm. 100 is high. . I also wish I had gotten her speech intervention. As an adult, it is very apparent. It wasn't when she was younger. Praying for you. I am coming to terms with the fact that my Aspie will probably never be self-sufficient and will be living with me for life after college. It's heartbreaking.

PP- There is hope for your daughter. Hygiene isn't just an issue for children with asp. Its an issue for a lot of neurotypical children at college too, I know as I have one NT and one asp diagnosis. Sending you good vibes that you can find a good treatment team for your daughter and things will improve.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here - thanks for responses so far. I so don't want to hear this. Plus my husband thinks I am ridiculous for thinking anything is off. A few reasons why:

-She is smart and gets great grades - if she is doing well in school, he doesn't see a problem.

-When she wants to focus and get something done - she can (for some reason, racing with her little brother gets her to move quickly, for instance).

-She, herself doesn't think there is a problem.

Does this change anyone's assessment?

No. Inattentive ADHD runs in my family. The family members with it all have high IQs and have done well in school. They can hyper focus on things that interest them. They do not think they have a problem though others can see the ADHD.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here - thanks for responses so far. I so don't want to hear this. Plus my husband thinks I am ridiculous for thinking anything is off. A few reasons why:

-She is smart and gets great grades - if she is doing well in school, he doesn't see a problem.

-When she wants to focus and get something done - she can (for some reason, racing with her little brother gets her to move quickly, for instance).

-She, herself doesn't think there is a problem.

Does this change anyone's assessment?

Hi OP - this is the first PP whose daughter with ADHD inattentive turned out to be an Aspie. Alas, no. DD is so smart she qualified for youth Mensa (if you are in to that sort of thing - I signed her up to bolster her self-confidence which is at an all-time low). She got As and B+s throughout middle school and upper school years, although she did have an IEP once we got the Asperger's diagnosis. I think her I.Q. is 147. She scored a combined 33 on the ACT (but not the writing part - she cannot write). She made honor society at college. But she cannot drive (she drives like Temple Gradin - go rent the movie if you have not seen it), cannot self-regulate at college, cannot get herself to wash her hair, take her meds or go to bed or get up on time. She has little self-awareness (she's probably emotionally about 12 years old) so when younger did not realize there was a problem except that homework took forever. She also would stay in the shower as long as we would let her. I have found some adult Aspies on this site who explained that for them showering is a nightmare because "it's like peeling my skin off when I remove my clothes" then in the shower they said "I don't want to get out because then I have to decide what clothes to put on; often I just put on my old clothes so I don't have to make the decision". Hygiene has become an issue in college - DD is working with a counselor there on the showering issue. For what it's worth, DH thinks the shower is the equivalent of Temple Grandin's "squeeze-box" but that makes sense only if you see the movie. For what it's worth, our pediatrician, like your husband, didn't think there was anything NT off. There clearly was. I wish I had got intervention earlier. Was your child late to potty train? Have GERD or digestive issues? Our pediatrician ignored all of those symptoms too. Only after seeing a ped. endocrinologist did we discover that DD was not making up all the trips to the pott and digestive issues. She had five year old fecalomas inside her, a distended colon, and mega-colon. She will never be normal. I'm posting this not to alarm you. Nothing like this existed when we went through the trauma. My DH didn't even know what Asperger's was when we got the diagnosis. I pray I am very wrong and that all will work out really well for you. BTW we relied on a lot of $$ tutors. Composition and writing will always be a challenge. BTW, check DD's vitamin D levels. There is a brand new study indicating a link between vitamin D deficiency at birth and autism. DD just got at vitamin D test at her college - she scored only 21.5 on the 25(HO) test. 30 to 70 is norm. 100 is high. . I also wish I had gotten her speech intervention. As an adult, it is very apparent. It wasn't when she was younger. Praying for you. I am coming to terms with the fact that my Aspie will probably never be self-sufficient and will be living with me for life after college. It's heartbreaking.

PP- There is hope for your daughter. Hygiene isn't just an issue for children with asp. Its an issue for a lot of neurotypical children at college too, I know as I have one NT and one asp diagnosis. Sending you good vibes that you can find a good treatment team for your daughter and things will improve.

Thanks! Needed that cheering message

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here - thanks for responses so far. I so don't want to hear this. Plus my husband thinks I am ridiculous for thinking anything is off. A few reasons why:

-She is smart and gets great grades - if she is doing well in school, he doesn't see a problem.

-When she wants to focus and get something done - she can (for some reason, racing with her little brother gets her to move quickly, for instance).

-She, herself doesn't think there is a problem.

Does this change anyone's assessment?

Hi OP - this is the first PP whose daughter with ADHD inattentive turned out to be an Aspie. Alas, no. DD is so smart she qualified for youth Mensa (if you are in to that sort of thing - I signed her up to bolster her self-confidence which is at an all-time low). She got As and B+s throughout middle school and upper school years, although she did have an IEP once we got the Asperger's diagnosis. I think her I.Q. is 147. She scored a combined 33 on the ACT (but not the writing part - she cannot write). She made honor society at college. But she cannot drive (she drives like Temple Gradin - go rent the movie if you have not seen it), cannot self-regulate at college, cannot get herself to wash her hair, take her meds or go to bed or get up on time. She has little self-awareness (she's probably emotionally about 12 years old) so when younger did not realize there was a problem except that homework took forever. She also would stay in the shower as long as we would let her. I have found some adult Aspies on this site who explained that for them showering is a nightmare because "it's like peeling my skin off when I remove my clothes" then in the shower they said "I don't want to get out because then I have to decide what clothes to put on; often I just put on my old clothes so I don't have to make the decision". Hygiene has become an issue in college - DD is working with a counselor there on the showering issue. For what it's worth, DH thinks the shower is the equivalent of Temple Grandin's "squeeze-box" but that makes sense only if you see the movie. For what it's worth, our pediatrician, like your husband, didn't think there was anything NT off. There clearly was. I wish I had got intervention earlier. Was your child late to potty train? Have GERD or digestive issues? Our pediatrician ignored all of those symptoms too. Only after seeing a ped. endocrinologist did we discover that DD was not making up all the trips to the pott and digestive issues. She had five year old fecalomas inside her, a distended colon, and mega-colon. She will never be normal. I'm posting this not to alarm you. Nothing like this existed when we went through the trauma. My DH didn't even know what Asperger's was when we got the diagnosis. I pray I am very wrong and that all will work out really well for you. BTW we relied on a lot of $$ tutors. Composition and writing will always be a challenge. BTW, check DD's vitamin D levels. There is a brand new study indicating a link between vitamin D deficiency at birth and autism. DD just got at vitamin D test at her college - she scored only 21.5 on the 25(HO) test. 30 to 70 is norm. 100 is high. . I also wish I had gotten her speech intervention. As an adult, it is very apparent. It wasn't when she was younger. Praying for you. I am coming to terms with the fact that my Aspie will probably never be self-sufficient and will be living with me for life after college. It's heartbreaking.

PP- There is hope for your daughter. Hygiene isn't just an issue for children with asp. Its an issue for a lot of neurotypical children at college too, I know as I have one NT and one asp diagnosis. Sending you good vibes that you can find a good treatment team for your daughter and things will improve.

Thanks! Needed that cheering message

One thing that helped my DC was having outfits pre-matched and an otter box phone on the case. The otter box on the case allowed my DC to take phone into shower and use a checklist app. Also in regards to speech therapy, have you looked into something through the college.