How can I marry a rich guy?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Mom here. I have counseled my over achieving high earner of a son never to marry someone like you. His wife needs to pull her weight.

+1,000

And my dad taught my sisters and I to make our own $$.

I married well (husband makes $$$), but I am a STEM major/graduate degree that has always made my own bank.

I do not want my sons to end up with gold diggers that are only into them for the wallet.

But, smart, decent men can smell that kind a mile away. Probably why these pps have had no luck

+4, these threads really gross me out. I was always taught to be able to take care of myself financially, no matter what, which is why I pursued a graduate degree and chose a profession where I would make at least low six figures even in a "lifestyle" job. my DH is a high earner (probably not by DCUM standards, but he makes ~500K) and I make a little more than half of that. Obviously we are very fortunate and able to outsource a lot of household tasks (meal prep, housecleaning, babysitting) and we also have family nearby to help. OP, you need to change your career track and think about how you can build the life you want with your job. Plus as other PPs have pointed, at mid-30s, it is going to be difficult to land a wealthy man who has already built his career and will be wary of women like you.

[Anonymous]

Steal him from someone else.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I do not make good money due to poor decision making regarding my college major and subsequent work in the non-profit sector. I am not particularly ambitious or talented at climbing the corporate ladder so I always knew I wanted to marry a rich guy so I can have a better quality of life. The problem is, I can’t seem to attract well-to-do men. All my boyfriends have been the free-spirited, artistically inclined. One was trained as an engineer but preferred to work as a fitness instructor and the other had a graduate degree in liberal arts but was starting his own business.

I know what I want. I want someone ambitious and no nonsense who wants a comfortable upper middle class life. I want to be his wife and raise our kids while happily working a less stressful job or working on my passion projects.

What do I bring to the table?

I’m reasonably pretty, nice and a good home maker. I also love children and sex. I am in my mid thirties.

Please help!

I don’t believe for a minute that a person like this would be a good home maker, etc. if by her own admission she is on the prowl for a rich guy and also exhibits poor decision making. Ginger from Casino comes to mind.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Assuming you aren't a troll...

You need to go after someone at least 15 years older than you.

Also assuming you aren't a troll..
You don't need to be 'reasonably pretty', you need to knock him dead. And you homemaking skills aren't necessarily relevant to a rich guy, although there are different kinds of 'rich guys, to be fair.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Assuming you aren't a troll...

You need to go after someone at least 15 years older than you.

Mid 30s is way way too late to enact this plan. You need divorcee with grown kids and maybe table the idea of having your own kids.

Well, a 50-year-old load divorcee is a plan, doncha think?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Be a hot twentysomething administrative assistant at a hedge fund.

Let me guess, you're 45+? Or have no idea how hedge funds work these days? Or both?
No one is marrying their 'twentysomething' secretaries anymore.

[Anonymous]

OP, it would be much easier for you to go back to school and get a job making more money yourself. Then you can marry for love.

[Anonymous]

Due to the increasing trend of assortive mating....your odds are not good, I'm sorry. Colleges, law schools, MBA programs and med schools have a large number of educated, polished, very attractive, socially skilled women. So do the work settings they enter afterward. I think women who have not bern exposed to these settings do not realize this...many women have an embarrassment of riches to begin with and no I don't just mean their own family money (though some have that too). Water seeks its own level...if you are not an equal or bring something significant and special, it will be hard. Develop yourself and become the man you want to marry. That's my best advice.

[Anonymous]

During graduate school I was surprised by how many of the women I went to school with, .y peers, had the whole package: Pretty, very smart, nice family, psychologically and personally sophisticated, friendly, down to earth and ambitious. These are powerful attractors.

[Anonymous]

It's true that there are now large numbers of smart, attractive and highly educated and accomplished women in the dating pool. Being gorgeous alone or very traditional, is rarely enough. Times have changed

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a bunch of single male friends in your age range who are well-off (I'm similar, but happily married). None of them are looking for a low-ambition wife who is just pretty and brings nothing to the table. You say you like sex and having children. Well, just about every woman loves children and most women love sex (at least during the dating phase).

My theory is that these guys would feel the other guys in our group would look down on him if he's just getting a "trophy" wife.

Unfortunately, she isn’t qualified to be a trophy wife at this age. Mid Thirties and only reasonably good looking disqualifies her.

[Anonymous]

Do you care if you're in love with him or very attracted to him? If not, then your shot is much higher at landing some socially inept but rich nerd. I meet guys like this through DH because of their industry and while there are plenty of attractive, social, and rich nerds, most are either married or looking for someone that is an equal. But there are the guys with poor social skills, don't put much into their appearance or taking care of themselves, who are wealthy and single. So if you're just looking to marry money and not love, this would be an easy target for you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m amused by all these posters saying “a successful guy in his 30s will only marry an equally successful woman.”

No. That happens, but rarely at this age because by 35, successful people are in a trajectory where the last thing they need is a partner in the same phase. It’s going to make kids impossible and you’re going to be at odds a lot.

More often, they marry a woman “on their level” — similar education background, maybe spent a few years in law or consulting before bailing for an easier gig, has some family money/support to sweeten the deal. But she’s not got some hard charging career— she’s fully ready to pivot to kids with a less stressful job or maybe even being a SAHM.

OP, that could be you. I think you need to learn to brand yourself. You’re coming off as a bit of a sad sack. Learn to tell your story in a more appealing way, then go hard for corporate lawyers or similar on dating apps. Ask friends who work for high paying employers if they know any single guys. Then sell yourself. Be charming, upbeat, interested in him. Do you have a cute hobby that gives you an excuse to dress super sexy on an early date? Something like roller derby? You need to get methodical about this.

+1 I found the one useful post! OP, you are not some burnout sad sack. You are college-educated and work at a non-profit. Attractive women who work at non-profits dating professional higher-earning guys is so common in DC that it's a stereotype. Get on the apps, do an activity like rec soccer or triathlon training team, ask your friends to set you up.

It's true that, at 35+, most of the guys who want a family already have one or are well on the way (engaged/married). You should be open to divorcees a few years older than you, maybe even with kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do you care if you're in love with him or very attracted to him? If not, then your shot is much higher at landing some socially inept but rich nerd. I meet guys like this through DH because of their industry and while there are plenty of attractive, social, and rich nerds, most are either married or looking for someone that is an equal. But there are the guys with poor social skills, don't put much into their appearance or taking care of themselves, who are wealthy and single. So if you're just looking to marry money and not love, this would be an easy target for you.

I was going to say the same thing...a socially limited, sort of awkward but very smart, driven, professional of some sort...op seems to feel entitled to the top of the heap which is interesting. As if these dreamboat are all over the place...they are not and they want the best they can get as well. And they will be flawed too so unless you are in love with the guy it's hard to make it long term. Op, long term marriage gets hard under the best of circumstances even when you start off in love. Marry for money and you earn every penny is the phrase often cited here. Rethink your goals.

[Anonymous]

Sounds like you need to reevaluate what you think you're "bringing to the table" if it isn't working.